how to make a good hook for a book review

8 story hook examples (how to grab attention)

A ‘hook’ in a story promises intrigue, entertainment and answers to the questions it raises. Far from the trickery of a bait and switch, a hook gives a true sense of what your reader can expect of your story’s pleasures. Explore great story hook examples and what they teach us about starting strong:

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A literary ‘hook’ in a story promises intrigue, entertainment and answers to the questions it raises. Far from the trickery of a bait and switch, a hook gives a true sense of what your reader can expect of your story’s pleasures. Explore great story hook examples and what they teach us about starting strong

Story hook examples

A literary ‘hook’ in a story promises intrigue, entertainment and answers to the questions it raises. Far from the trickery of a bait and switch, a hook gives a true sense of what your reader can expect of your story’s pleasures. A brilliant hook also also grabs a reader’s attention from the get go, to encourage them to read on. A hook can also show a strong voice from the start. Explore great story hook examples and what they teach us about starting strong. Here are eight types of hooks.

These hooks in narrative writing a hook should: Raise curiosity, create questions and promise eventful action with them.

1. All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr

At dusk they pour from the sky. They blow across the ramparts, turn cartwheels over rooftops, flutter into the ravines between houses. Entire streets swirl with them, flashing white against the cobbles. Urgent message to the inhabitants of this town , they say. Depart immediately to open country . Anthony Doerr, All the Light We Cannot See (2014), p. 3.

2. Anil’s Ghost by Michael Ondaatje

When the team reached the site at five-thirty in the morning, one or two family members would be waiting for them. And they would be present all day while Anil and the others worked, never leaving; they spelled each other so someone always stayed, as if to ensure that the evidence would not be lost again . Michael Ondaatje, Anil’s Ghost (2000), p. 5.

3. Let The Great World Spin by Colum McCann

Those who saw him hushed. On Church Street. Liberty. Cortlandt. West Street. Fulton. Vesey. It was a silence that heard itself, awful and beautiful. Some thought at first that it must have been a trick of the light, something to do with the weather, an accident of shadowfall. Others figured it might be the perfect city joke – stand around and point upward, until people gathered, tilted their heads… Colum McCann, Let The Great World Spin (2009), p. 3.

4. Alias Grace by Margaret Atwood

It’s 1851. I’ll be twenty-four years old next birthday. I’ve been shut up in here since the age of sixteen. I am a model prisoner, and give no trouble. That’s what the Governor’s wife says, I have overheard her saying it. I’m skilled at overhearing. If I am good enough and quiet enough, perhaps after all they will let me go; but it’s not easy being quiet and good… Margaret Atwood, Alias Grace (1996), p. 5

5. The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V.E. Schwab

Villon-sur-sarthe, France, July 29, 1714 A girl is running for her life. The summer air burns at her back, but there are no torches, no angry mobs, only the distant lanterns of the wedding party, the reddish glow of the sun as it breaks against the horizon, cracks and spills across the hills, and the girl runs, skirts tangling in the grass as she surges toward the woods, trying to beat the dying light. V.E. Schwab, The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue (2020), p. 3.

6. On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong

Let me begin again. Dear ma, I am writing to reach you-even if each word I put down is one word further from where you are. I am writing to go back to the time, at the rest stop in Virginia, when you stared, horror-struck, at the taxidermy buck hung over the soda machine by the restrooms, its antlers shadowing your face. Ocean Vuong, On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous (2019), p. 3

7. God Help the Child by Toni Morrison

It’s not my fault. So you can’t blame me. I didn’t do it and have no idea how it happened. It didn’t take more than an hour after they pulled her out from between my legs to realize something was wrong. Really wrong. Toni Morrison, God Help the Child (2015), p. 3

8. Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens

On the morning of October 30, 1969, the body of Chase Andrews lay in the swamp, which would have absorbed it silently, routinely. Hiding it for good. A swamp knows about death, and doesn’t necessarily define it as tragedy, certainly not a sin. Delia Owens, Where the Crawdads Sing (2018), p. 6

The examples of hooks from novels above illustrate what effective hooks do:

How to write good hooks for stories:

Great story hooks do one or more of the following. They:

• Build urgency
• Prompt pressing questions
• Involve intriguing contexts
• Introduce striking voices
• Show a glimpse of a vivid world
• Imply past or future conflicts
• Build narrative tension
• Share relevant backstory
• Set the story’s tone

Let’s explore each of these ideas in brief with reference to the story hook examples given above.

Ways to write hooks:

1. build urgency.

A girl running for her life; a dead body lying in a swamp; a crowd gathering to point into the sky.

Each of these actions or images create a kind of urgency that hooks a reader into the story.

The reader wants to know why a girl is running for her life. We need to find out who murdered Chase Andrews. We want to know what the crowds are staring up at in Let The Great World Spin (an urban tightrope walker).

To build urgency in your story’s hook, you could:

• Describe an action with a time limit: For example, having ten minutes to get to a crucial interview
• Share actions with high stakes: A girl running for her life; a tightrope walker between NY skyscrapers
• Imply a situation requiring urgent investigation: A murder, a mystery – a vital piece of missing information for one or more characters

What needs to happen at the start of your story (or scene, or chapter) that is of utmost priority for your characters?

Watch this brief video on how to write hooks and keep reading for more ideas:

Story Hook Examples: How to grab attention

2. Prompt pressing questions

Good story openings include meandering beginnings that take time getting to the point (this is especially common in literary novels that do not necessarily require the brisk pace of a thriller).

Yet even if your story opening is gentler, more tone-and-mood-setting, a question hook, rather than full-tilt action, how can you prompt pressing questions, creating elements of a hook?

In the opening hook to Anil’s Ghost , for example, we wonder what evidence is being sought that could be ‘lost again’.

A good story makes us ask ‘who’, ‘what’, ‘why’, ‘where’ and ‘when’ at several junctures. The hook is a crucial place to set up these questions. Tweet This

For the above story hook examples, readers may have questions such as:

• What are people gathering to point at? ( Let The Great World Spin )
• What or who is the girl running from? (The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue )
• Why does the narrator think something is gravely wrong with her newborn (God Help the Child )
• When will the prisoner be released, if ever? ( Alias Grace )

What thought-provoking questions does your hook give your reader? You can also use a rhetorical question as a hook. Or, use a statistic hook, quoting facts and figures to grip a reader’s attention.

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3. Involve intriguing contexts

The best story hooks don’t only grab our attention. They tell us (often in a highly compressed way) a lot about the world we’re about to enter. Why we’re in for a good story .

We begin to understand aspects of con text such as place , era, scenario and situation. That a wartime city is about to be evacuated, for example ( All the Light We Cannot See ). Or that there is a wedding party, somewhere in the periphery, that may be relevant to a character’s current situation ( The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue ).

What makes context intriguing? Elements such as:

• Implied recent, imminent or eventual conflicts
• Interesting, compelling relationships (e.g. the man writing to his mother at the start of On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous )
• Interesting facts (for example, Delia Owens’ description of the swamp’s peculiarities as a biome opening Where the Crawdads Sing )

How can you involve your characters’ contexts at the start of a novel, chapter or scene so that your reader pricks up their ears?

4. Introduce striking voices

We tend to think of hooks strictly in terms of ‘Plot’ with a capital ‘P’. Yet a hook may be something as simple as teasing the reader with introduction to an interesting character (or multiple characters).

For example, in the opening to Ocean Vuong’s On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous (written as a Vietnamese-American man’s letters to his abusive mother), there is an immediate, intimate sense of a connection between two characters. A connection that has its own complex history filled with vignettes such as the rest stop scene the narrator describes.

We have an immediate sense of voice through the wording of the man’s letter.

A hook thus is not only made up of the pressing or intriguing questions it inspires. It can also be something as simply compelling as a lone, specific voice reaching out to us from the written page.

You could also consider using a quotation hook. This, as the name implies, means using a quote from a notable or famous person. This will serve introduce the topic of your story, or lead into it. A quote hook will can be effective in reeling your reader in from the word go.

What makes your viewpoint narrator’s voice compelling from the first line? What fragment of their experiences, beliefs, fears or desires may invite your reader into their narrative?

5. Show a glimpse of a vivid world

Many novels start with story hooks that describe and define place, a descriptive hook. Delia Owens’ swamp facts at the beginning of Where the Crawdads Sing , for example. Or Ondaatje’s description of a forensic archaeological site in Sri Lanka.

To hook readers in, you could show a glimpse of what is extraordinary about this place. The dead body in the swamp with its already remarkable properties. The strange hunting trophy on the rest stop wall that fills the narrator’s mother with horror in On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous . These are all examples of vivid descriptions of scenes that create a picture  in a reader’s mind.

What detail is typical of your story’s era, time or primary location? Or else, your hook could begin with something out-of-the-ordinary – the tightrope walker between towers of Let The Great World Spin , for example.

6. Imply past or future conflicts

Stories are about change, at root. Nothing is an agent of change like conflict (as the evacuation order leaflets at the start of All the Light We Cannot See show).

As an example, on the first page of God Help the Child by Toni Morrison, we wonder what is so wrong about the narrator’s newborn.

We quickly learn that her worry is driven by colorism, a by-product of racism. The narrator’s child has been born ‘midnight black, Sudanese black’ (p. 3), the mother’s surprise being because she has lighter skin tone herself.

From the first page, this story hook example suggests conflicts at the heart of racism; its comparative prejudices and violences. We wonder how others will treat this child due to a mother’s concern, thus her anxious focus creates narrative suspense.

What past or anticipated conflicts might feature strongly in the opening pages of your story? Find ways to build a hook around their suspense.

7. Build narrative tension

The best story hook examples teach us how to build narrative tension from the start. It may be something as simple as Addie LaRue running for her life from the wedding party. Or else the hush of a crowd craning their necks at a terrifying, aerial spectacle.

To build narrative tension in your hook, you could use just such an attention-grabbing hook:

• Describe high-stakes events (e.g. a man walking a tightrope between skyscrapers)
• Imply an immediate struggle or obstacle (for example, the implied hurdles of being ‘other’ in the opening to God Help the Child )
• Suggest a situation whose outcome could go either way (for example, whether the protagonist will be released from prison or not in Alias Grace )

8. Share relevant backstory

Beginning with a large chunk of backstory that is irrelevant to the main events of your story is not a good way to begin. Your reader may quickly become bored, as writing coach Romy Sommer explains:

An issue I see with a lot of beginner writers is they tend to write the backstory as the story itself. So the first few chapters will be, ‘This thing happened, and then this thing happened…’ Understanding Character Arcs: How to write characters, preview on YouTube

Good story hook examples instead of giving all the backstory tell the reader backstory that is relevant to the current situation.

For example, the petty crime that lead a character to be currently incarcerated. Or the evacuation order that lead to your character’s current hurrying from their home city. This type of hook is useful for revealing just as much as you want to in a few simple sentences.

Relevant backstory tells us just enough to give the present scene context, history, and fuller narrative purpose .

9. Set the story’s tone

Many of the story hook examples listed above set the tone for the story. Addie LaRue’s bid for freedom, to not ‘just’ be anybody’s wife, for example. Or Little Dog’s difficult, complex relationship with his mother in On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous .

How can your story’s hook hint at your story’s primary subjects, themes and symbols?

Writing exercise: ‘Toning’ your hook

Find three adjectives for a hook sentence you’d like to write. For example:

• Tense, unsettling, eerie
• Lyrical, languid, mysterious
• Gritty, fast, loud
• Silly, quirky, unexpected

Write a sentence to a paragraph while thinking about your three adjectives. How many questions out of the 5 (‘who’, ‘what’, ‘why’, ‘where’ and ‘when’) can you make your reader ask?

Start finessing your story idea now so you have the foundation for a brilliant hook.

Related Posts:

• Grabbing attention with scene beginnings: 5 tips
• 10 dialogue tips to hook readers
• How to start a novel: Hook readers from page one
• Tags how to write a hook , story openings

Jordan is a writer, editor, community manager and product developer. He received his BA Honours in English Literature and his undergraduate in English Literature and Music from the University of Cape Town.

20 replies on “8 story hook examples (how to grab attention)”

Another excellent and practical article, Jordan. Thank you!

Thank you for the kind feedback, MJ! Have a lovely week.

Hi Jordan, so glad I stumbled on this article while researching Hook / Concept! Excellent information and I’ve printed it off (for an anti-clutter frugal printer, that is quite high praise lol). Now off to read your other articles. Thanks!!

Hi Regan, thank you so much for your kind feedback and taking the time to share it. I am only happy to contribute to print-clutter 🙂 It’s a pleasure, have a good week.

Thanks Jordon you help me a lot I am writing a non fiction article I needed to find out about a good hook how to try to hook reader in the first sentence I got it thanks to your explanations if you ever teach writing lessons on how write short stories for children I ready to enlist thanks for your help

Hi Scooter, it’s a pleasure. Penguin has a useful article by Alan Durant on how to write a children’s picture book here that you may find interesting. Happy holidays!

Thank you, Jordan. I found this very helpful! People so often talk about a ‘hook’ and it’s interesting to really break it down to see what makes it work.

Hi Rebecca, it’s a pleasure. I’m glad to hear that! Thank you for reading our blog and have fun working on your story’s hook 🙂

Very helpful. Thanks. Although, I noticed that you use ‘their’ to refer to the woman giving birth, but ‘him’ to the person writing to the mother, whose gender was not revealed in the sentence. sigh. why do we need to erase women? Other than that small observation, very useful info.

Thank you for your feedback and my apologies, definitely no erasure intended. I think the spur-of-the-moment rationale was probably to use the neutral ‘their’ due to the ungendered reference in the immediate sentence (‘the narrator’). Yet since the narrator in question is indeed a woman, I’ve changed it to ‘her’. I’m glad you found this article useful, thank you for reading and sharing.

If you had to pick one story hook, which would you pick, having something blow up or a tiny man shrinking?

Hi Alex, thank you for your question about story hooks. Explosions are fairly standard for action stories, but depending on the context it could be a safe in medias res starting point. But if a man is tiny already, why would he be shrinking? Thanks for reading our blog.

Great article. It helped me a lot with my writing. thanks

So glad to hear that, Sule. It’s a pleasure, thank you for your feedback and for reading our blog.

Excellent examples and a well written article.

Hi Debra, thank you for your kind feedback. I’m glad you enjoyed this article.

I hope this doesn’t annoy you, I’m compelled to rearrange wording until its more clear to me of what’s being said.

We tend to think of hooks strictly in terms of ‘Plot’ with a capital ‘P’. Yet a hook is just as often made from an inviting ‘who’—or compellingly repulsive anti-hero.

Hi Meka, not at all, thank you. I appreciate all help from our readers in making my articles better, especially when feedback is constructive like this. I’ve rewritten that sentence for clarity (I’m always updating articles here thanks to readers’ helpful suggestions). Thanks for sharing.

I’ve struggled for ages to understand hooks and inciting incidents! I’m autistic, and despite having a great logical brain, sometimes it takes the right kind of teaching by breaking down a concept into steps, then “steplets” lmao. I’ve been writing for years, but never actually LEARNED how, if you know what I mean. Now I want to write a proper fanfiction that’s not for kids. I want it to be as scary and spine tingling as possible without being heavy handed. This article helps a ton!!! I’m definitely gonna check out any others and watch the linked videos! Thank you very much for the help! ^–^ ♡♡♡

Thanks Rose. That’s wonderful to hear, so pleased that this is so helpful. Enjoy the videos and the rest of our varied blog posts.

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How to Write a Hook for a Book

Last Updated: February 22, 2024 Approved

This article was co-authored by Christopher Taylor, PhD . Christopher Taylor is an Adjunct Assistant Professor of English at Austin Community College in Texas. He received his PhD in English Literature and Medieval Studies from the University of Texas at Austin in 2014. There are 8 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. wikiHow marks an article as reader-approved once it receives enough positive feedback. In this case, 83% of readers who voted found the article helpful, earning it our reader-approved status. This article has been viewed 82,176 times.

Writing a “hook” can mean 2 different things and will require 2 different methods. You may be trying to write a first line for your book that draws your reader into the story right away and encourages them to turn the page. Or you may be creating a hook summary for a book to promote your book to a publisher or to readers. You can create either “hook” using a few straightforward steps.

Writing a Hook First Line

• For your first line, you can use a strong, interesting description to describe an image of your main character in action. For example, the first line of Joseph Heller’s novel Catch-22 : “Yossarian was in the hospital with a pain in his liver that fell just short of being jaundice.” This is a strong opening because the main character is introduced to the reader right away, he is placed in a setting, and he has an issue he has to deal with.
• You can also start with a description of the setting of your book. For example, the first line of J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Hobbit : “In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.” [3] X Research source This is a simple, direct opening that capture the reader’s attention.

• For example, the opening line of Kate Morton’s The Forgotten Garden : “It was dark where she was crouched but the little girl did as she’d been told.” [4] X Research source This is a good hook opening line because it places the reader in the action, creating a situation that suggests danger or fear for the “little girl.” This is also known as an “in medias res” opening.

• For example, the opening line of J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone : “Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much.” [7] X Research source This is a third person narrative voice that has attitude and color to it, drawing readers into the story.
• The first line of Vladimir Nabokov’s novel Lolita is another good example, as the novel begins: “Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins.” [8] X Research source Right away the reader is prepared for a unique narrator who is not afraid to embellish, entertain, and disturb.

• For example, the opening lines of Nick Hornby’s novel Juliet, Naked : “They had flown from England to Minneapolis to look at a toilet.” [11] X Research source This first line pulls the reader in right away and sets up a strange, engaging situation.

• For example, if you are writing a book with a reader who is young adult, you may start the story with a young adult in mind. Consider what details or moments you might include if you were writing for a young adult.
• This may also be a useful tactic if you are writing a hook for a book that is non-fiction, as you may consider what fact, anecdote, or moment in the history you are writing about would most spark your reader’s interest.

Creating a Hook Summary for a Book

• Your hook should grab your reader’s attention in 30 seconds and act like the elevator pitch for your book. Having a strong hook in your book proposal or in the marketing material for your book can make it seem more attractive to an editor or a literary agent.
• Your hook should also explain how your book is different from the other books that are currently available. If you are writing in a specific genre, the hook should also tell your reader how and why your book is different from the other books published in that genre.

• Most hooks for a book are written in the present tense, rather than the past tense, to make the hook feel more active to the reader. You should try to always use the present tense to describe the action in the book.

• You should use engaging nouns in your hook to describe the main plot. Avoid too many adjectives or adverbs. You want the hook to be descriptive, but not long-winded or too full of descriptors. When in doubt, simple is better for the hook.
• Make sure you do not reveal the ending of the book in the hook, only the main plot. The ending of the book should be included in your synopsis of the book, not in the hook.

• You can try the following formula to create your hook, using character and action: “When [opening conflict] happens to [characters], they must [overcome conflict] to [complete their quest].”
• For example, the hook for J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone could be: “When a Dark Lord murders a boy wizard’s parents, he must train for the battle for his life to save his friends and the wizarding world.” This hook is simple and straightforward, so it will be more likely to entice readers.

• You can then revise the hook so it is more concise and to the point. Your hook should be no longer than 1 to 2 sentences and should leave the reader wanting to read your book in full.

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• ↑ http://writeitsideways.com/6-ways-to-hook-your-readers-from-the-very-first-line/
• ↑ http://www.time4writing.com/learning-how-to-write/starting-with-a-hook/
• ↑ https://bookriot.com/2016/09/21/the-37-best-lines-from-the-hobbit/
• ↑ https://bookriot.com/2019/11/15/first-line-of-harry-potter/
• ↑ https://pen.org/multimedia/opening-lines-lolita/
• ↑ https://www.kibin.com/essay-writing-blog/good-hook-sentences/
• ↑ http://www.booksandsuch.com/blog/8-tips-for-writing-a-powerful-hook-for-your-book-proposal/
• ↑ http://www.rachellegardner.com/writing-a-one-sentence-summary/

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Guides • Perfecting your Craft

Last updated on Nov 09, 2023

How To Craft a Book Hook (Tips from Editors)

Could you describe what your book is about in a clear, engaging, and concise manner? That's precisely the purpose of a book hook, also known as a pitch.

In this post, we'll break down what a book hook is, why it matters for authors, and how to craft a successful one, borrowing from the wisdom of accomplished authors, editors, and literary agents. 

Are you ready for a literary agent?

Find out here! Takes one minute.

What is a book hook?

A book hook or pitch is a one-sentence summary that encapsulates the essence of your book and leaves the listener or reader intrigued. Whether you share it with a literary agent , a potential reader, or a total stranger, the goal is to leave them eager to hear more.

It is based on the concept of the "elevator pitch," which comes from the business world and refers to the scenario of being able to clearly and succinctly present a business idea to people who could help make it a reality by the time they reach their floor. 

🪝The terms "hook" and "elevator pitch" refer to the same concept but are used in different settings. The hook is the written version, ideal for marketing materials and book descriptions. The elevator pitch is the spoken version you'd use in a face-to-face conversation, perhaps with an agent or publisher.

In the literary world, a pitch has multiple purposes depending on where you are in the publishing process. It can serve as a "North Star" as you write your book, but also as a sales tool to pitch it to agents or readers once the book is ready to hit the market. 

Your North Star as you write the book

Author Tom Bromley, the instructor behind Reedsy's How to Write a Novel course, argues that it’s a good idea to craft your pitch before you even start writing. “The process of pruning down your story to a single sentence is invaluable. It’ll really help you understand what is at your novel’s heart. The sharper and clearer you can make that pitch, the smoother a writing journey you'll have.”

A well-crafted book pitch can serve as a lifeline when you're grappling with writer's block or feel like you're losing the thread of your plot . “I always advise my students to keep their pitch on a post-it note for easy reference. Then ask themselves, 'How does this chapter contribute to my core idea?' If it doesn't, they might be veering off course.” 

FREE RESOURCE

The 5 P's of Novel Preparation

This worksheet will help you nail down your 5 P's and start your novel on the right foot.

The pitch will also come handy in the book publication phase.  

Your very first sales tool

A book pitch is an essential part of promoting your book . You can use it as a compelling first line in your Amazon blurb , as a hook that nicely leads to the book synopsis of your query letter , or simply place it on the back of the book cover or social media banners to intrigue potential readers. 

As editor Rebecca Heyman points out, the process of crafting your book pitch can help you become more comfortable with selling your book. “Advocating for your book and your story is a critical part of going from the inward-facing process of authorship, to the outer-facing process of obtaining readership.” 

Book Blurb Template

Learn to write a book blurb that hooks readers from the first sentence.

Let's look into how to write a book pitch, and what its essential components are.

How to write a book hook

A well-crafted book hook often introduces some story elements, like the main character, central conflict, and stakes, and potentially other intriguing details, like a unique setting or magic system. There isn’t a single formula to write a pitch, but there are a few essential elements to keep in mind. 

Include conflict, change, and details

According to Tom Bromley, the pitch should emphasize the central conflict that drives your story. “Conflict creates dramatic tension, especially when its outcome is uncertain.” Additionally, since stories revolve around change, it should hint at some character’s transformation. Finally, it could include some details, like character names or the setting, to distinguish it from other stories. 

Let’s take as an example the hook for The Fellowship of the Ring by J. R. R. Tolkien:

Introduce the character, conflict, and stakes

For another perspective, editor Rebecca Heyman argues that the pitch should introduce the main characters, the primary conflict, and the stakes. “The stakes are the reason people care about the conflict — the larger personal or global impact that the resolution of the conflict will have on the main character.”

Similar to Tom’s advice, there are subtle differences. Let’s take the hook for The Martian by Andy Weir as an example:  

You have a main character (the astronaut,) his goal/conflict (surviving Mars until rescue,) and the stakes (testing the limits of human ingenuity and, obviously, his life.) What will he come up with? Will his team help him? Will he survive? 

As editor and former literary agent Jennifer Udden says, a great pitch leaves the listener intrigued, not confused. "Your audience should have questions because they're excited, not because they require answers to those questions to get excited."

🤓 Watch editors Rebecca Heyman and Jennifer Udden review several book pitches submitted by aspiring authors, giving tips on how to improve them.

To craft your hook, it might be useful to break down your story into these components: 

• The main characters 
• Their primary conflict/goal
• What’s at stake if they don’t achieve it.

But also identify some surprising story elements or details that could help make it stand out. As a starting point, you could use this template:

Set in [place and time period], the story follows [protagonist], who wants to [goal/motivation], but [conflict] doesn’t make that easy, putting [stake] at risk.

Ultimately, your hook should be as unique as your book, so tinker with it until it “feels right.” As you read it out loud or test it on friends, it should sound smooth, clear, and captivating. To get a better sense of what a good hook sounds like, read our next post which lists dozens of book pitch examples.   

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8 Tips for Writing a Powerful Hook for Your Book Proposal

August 17, 2012 //  by  Mary Keeley //   71 Comments

Blogger: Mary Keeley

Last week I gave you a list of tips for writing a perfect synopsis here . Today I’ll list some tips on how to write a powerful hook for your book proposal.

With the growing number of electronic and social media diversions competing for people’s attention, the hook on the first page of your book is proportionately more important to grab readers’ attention, make them hungry for more—and eventually to recommend your book to friends. A compelling hook in your book proposal is equally vital because you have one chance to convince an agent or editor to continue reading.

The hook is not a shorter brief description. This is a frequent mistake I see in proposals, and it reveals more than a lack of understanding of a hook’s purpose. It implies a lesser writing skill or possibly even the author’s lack of clarity about his or her book.

The hook is the first impression the agent or editor will have of your book. It is more than marketing copy. It should capture what your book is about in very few words.

• The hook in your proposal should be one or two sentences. In your manuscript the hook can be up to several paragraphs. I think this difference is where confusion has occurred. Remember that you have only 30 seconds to attract an agent or editor to continue reading your proposal. If you can’t distill the hook to an attention-grabbing sentence or two, their perception may be that your story or topic isn’t strong enough to warrant further reading. Before you think agents and editors are cruel and insensitive, understand that we have stacks of proposals to read and precious little time available to do so. It’s an unfortunate reality in the industry. But it underscores the necessity of having a powerful hook in your proposal, doesn’t it.
• Use strong active—never passive—verbs that convey the emotion or pressing need in your book. Use present tense.
• Allude to the main plot or the issue at stake—the main conflict or crisis. If you can encapsulate the essence in a word or two, great! Use them in an illusive, edgy, bold, or passionate sentence—whichever type corresponds with your book. But don’t explain the conflict or crisis. That’s the job of the synopsis.
• It isn’t necessary to refer specifically to the protagonist but if you do, use his or her name. It can create a personal connection with the character in an instant.
• Sometimes it’s more intriguing to make a passionate but general statement that conveys the central theme.
• Use colorful nouns; eliminate adjectives.
• Questions are for back cover copy, not the hook.
• Unlike the synopsis, do not reveal the ending of your novel in the hook.

One way to start writing your hook is to jot down some sentences about the main plot or topic of your book and the main characters (fiction) or people and ideas (nonfiction). Search for a few strong words that capture the theme and conflict in your story or message and build from there.

In their book Write the Perfect Book Proposal, Jeff Herman and Deborah Levine Herman define the hook this way: “ . . . the hook for your book proposal is the power point from which your ideas take flight.” I like this description because it shows the passion a hook should have to make an agent sit up and say, “Ooh . . . sounds interesting!”

What do you find to be the hardest part about writing a hook for your proposal? What approach works best for you in narrowing down your words and phrases?

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August 17, 2012 at 7:17 am

Writing the hook is challenging, but I really enjoy it. My years as a newspaper reporter benefit me here since every story was supposed to lead with a strong hook.

I once read this formula (wish I could remember where and give credit!) that helped immensely: When OPENING CONFLICT happens to CHARACTER(s), they have to OVERCOME CONFLICT to COMPLETE QUEST.

August 17, 2012 at 7:20 am

Excellent, Sarah. Thanks for sharing.

August 17, 2012 at 8:30 am

Oh, thank you! This is great!

November 8, 2013 at 7:20 pm

I am struggling to write a good hook. I have written my first novel and submitted the first 50 pages to an agent who requested them. She wrote back asking me to give her a hook and then resubmit. Here is what I have: If someone had told her she would go without sex for a decade, she would have never believed them. She liked sex. Loved it really. But sometimes, life gets in the way of things you enjoy.

November 21, 2013 at 9:31 pm

Hi Sarah, Can you give some tips to find the hook in a content?

August 17, 2012 at 8:17 am

Great tips. Thanks, Mary!

Is there a difference between a logline and a hook? There are so many terms I get confused between them all. 🙂

August 17, 2012 at 8:46 am

Good question, Lindsay. They are similar. A logline is a one-sentence summary of a script/screenplay. The term hook is used in fiction and nonfiction. And a lead is a short opening sentence pointing to the facts in a magazine or news story.

August 17, 2012 at 10:10 am

Ah, okay. Like Michelle says below, I have also read that the hook can be a question. Like I said, so many things to remember! 🙂 Thanks for your help in understanding them.

November 21, 2013 at 9:33 pm

Hi Mary, I have a difficulty in finding a hook statement of a content. Can you please write a post or suggest me some ways to find hook statement?

August 17, 2012 at 8:39 am

I think, no wait, I know giving birth was easier than writing a hook! Okay, *perhaps* not, but I daresay, it might be close!

The hardest part is developing the emotional impact, in so very few words, that is needed to draw in an agent, to the point where they yell “Give me her email!! No wait, give me her cell phone number so I can call her in the middle of the night and make her world flip upside down!!!”

August 17, 2012 at 8:48 am

LOL . . . Many heads are nodding, Jennifer.

August 17, 2012 at 9:29 am

I always find the question versus statement hook to be a bit confusing. Some say write a question, some say writing a statement and experts in both camps. LOL! Thanks for clearing this up for me, Mary.

(I think the source of the strategy that Sarah mentioned is Susan May Warren. She uses those words in her training, but it could be someone else as well.)

August 17, 2012 at 10:25 am

Michelle, I shouldn’t have stated it as an absolute. If you can capture what the book is about, the emotion, and conflict in a short question, go for it. But most often, that isn’t easy to accomplish.

August 17, 2012 at 11:11 am

No worries, Mary. All of your insight is very helpful. Is anything in publishing absolute? Probably not. Lots of great information here! Thanks.

November 8, 2013 at 7:25 pm

Does the paragraph below evoke emotion and raise questions enough to be a good hook? What would you recommend to improve it.

If someone had told her she would live without sex for a decade, she would have never believed them. She liked sex. Loved it really. But sometimes, life gets in the way of things you enjoy.

August 17, 2012 at 10:31 am

Mary, I appreciate all you shared here today. I’m still figuring out how to write a hook that will draw people in. I’m glad to know questions or statements work. I’m pondering all you’ve shared, and all people are saying in the comments today. Thanks!!

August 17, 2012 at 11:04 am

You’re welcome, Jeanne.

August 17, 2012 at 10:52 am

First off, I just found out about Janet’s loss. I am so sorry to hear it. I offer my condolences and prayers for her and her family at this time.

Now to the post though, thanks for continually giving us hungry-for-more-advice writers some more good tips to store in our minds and hearts. I have written a two-sentence hook line that surprisingly (it was!) came quite easy for me. I am a trained journalist so I deal in “leads” too, so perhaps that helped. I can’t wait to finish the book proposal I am working on now and sending it hook line and all to an agent!

Also, if you don’t mind, Mary, I have a question. I know there has been obviously a lot going on at the office lately and I asked Wendy a question on her post the other day that she was not able to respond to. If you don’t mind, I would like to ask it now.

It is about a part of publishing contracts that limits signed authors to not publishing any other writing outside of their book contract. Does this apply to journalists too? I am a full-time newspaper reporter, so I must be able to publish to keep my job. It just concerned me when I read about that in her blog post. Thanks so much!

August 17, 2012 at 12:20 pm

Morgan, you are referring to Janet’s blog this past Monday. Wendy was responding to comments for her. The degree of stringency in non-compete clauses varies from publisher to publisher. Most of the clauses restrict an author from publishing other full-length books or books on the same tipic, not articles and news stories. In fact, articles, columns, and news stories are viewed as a means of promoting you and your books as long as the content doesn’t “give up the ship.”

Janet explains the reason non-compete clauses came into existence here https://booksandsuch.com/blog/publishers-contracts-and-how-they-got-that-way/

We B&S agents approach negotiation of these clauses from the very perspective you are concerned about: that an author has to be able to make a living. But there also is sound financial reason why publishers need to protect themselves. We work very hard to negotiate reasonable win-win agreements in these clauses.

August 17, 2012 at 1:09 pm

Thanks so much, Mary! I feel much better. I was a bit scared there for a moment. I am just entering the stages of querying, so the whole contract issue seems like a big looming dragon over my head. That’s why we need great agents though. That is the truth. 😀 Thanks and have a great weekend!

August 17, 2012 at 10:55 am

Very helpful post, Mary. I’m so grateful for your guidance, especially in my denser moments. 🙂 I’m wondering if some examples might help solidify these concepts? Like others, I get confused between how the hook is different from back-cover copy, etc.

August 17, 2012 at 11:43 am

I would really like to see the example like Sarah Forgrave has asked, for fiction most specifically.

This was a great post and while I think I understand it, it has clarified it more.

Thanks, Mary!

August 17, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Here’s what I have at the moment: “A self-righteous man, an unwed mother and a desperate drought–it will take a miracle to save the town and find forgiveness.”

August 17, 2012 at 12:53 pm

How about this one I saw recently for a romantic suspense novel:

Two snipers arrested. One sniper remains.

You know what the story is about, the central plot, the conflict and tension in six words.

The purpose of the hook in a proposal is to grab the editor’s attention an make him or her want to read more. Back cover copy on the back of your published book is written to market the book to potential readers. It is longer, explains a little more about the characters and story, and often ends with an enticing question about how the story might end. Its intent is to drive browsers to become purchasers.

August 17, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Great post.

But I will never get my hook this tight. Six words? I thought I was doing good to get it to 30 words. Ouch.

Thanks for laying it out clearly.

November 5, 2013 at 5:06 pm

I like: Two snipers arrested. One sniper remains. Why? 1. The sentences are short, balanced (both three words), and catchy. 2. Both sentences start with a number. 3. The statements beg a question. 4. And as you said, they you quickly grasp what the book is about and they create tension.

September 10, 2015 at 4:31 pm

I’m the newest of newbies, and your hook example was like deliverance. Lol Thank you…I finally got it! I requested time with you next week, and I really hope I get it. Amazingly helpful!

August 17, 2012 at 11:15 am

One of the many, many drawbacks of the glacial pace of the industry, is that even after I feel a proposal is “complete” and send it off, I find myself able to refine it: and many moons later, upon finding a courteous decline for representation in my e-box, realize that I would in all likelihood turn down the propsal if I had gotten it the form of the one first offered! 🙂

Not that there have been times with an agent I would have liked where I’ve been tempted to politely reply and thank them for their consideration, with the refined proposal attached…. 😉

August 17, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Larry, if it provides any comfort, you are in good company with many other writers. One way to minimize the potential for this scenario is to step away from your proposal for a week or two before you send it out. When you go back to it with fresh eyes, you’ll more readily notice wording, formatting that can be improved as well as spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors you missed.

It’s worth going through this process more than once until you don’t see more room for improvement.

Having said that, don’t go to extremes and end up in paralysis by analysis.

August 17, 2012 at 11:33 am

Thank you, Mary. You always give helpful and clear information.

Like Michelle, I have read contradictory statements about what a hook should be. It seems, though, that the goal is to write one or two sentences that not only get at the heart of the story (I’m speaking from a fiction writer’s point of view) and make an agent or editor jump out of the chair and say, “WOW!” That, for me, is the most intimidating part of writing a hook. Thank you for your suggestion to write down sentences and identify strong words connected with the book and its theme. Thank you also for # 3, 4 and 5. I thought that I had to get these in the hook. To intrigue by giving a little less detail seems like an effective approach.

Have a blessed weekend.

August 17, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Christine, I think some of the confusion or apparent contradiction occurs when it isn’t clear whether the advice you read is about the hook on the first page of your book or the hook in your book proposal.

The hook on the first page of your book can be several paragraphs long or a full page. It’s the opening scene that grabs the reader with a surprising statement or question and introduces a main character, making him or her appealing or sympathetic so readers begin to care about what happens and are compelled to turn the page.

Today I am talking about the hook in a book proposal, which is directed to catch an editor’s attention in your 30-second window of opportunity.

November 5, 2013 at 5:19 pm

The middle paragraph is the best description of what a hook should be that I’ve read — and I’ve been reading, reading, and reading the “how to” and first scenes in book after book. For writers looking for examples, here’s my favorite opening paragraph. It’s by Janet Evanovich in One for the Money: There are some men who enter a woman’s life and screw it up forever. Joseph Morelli did this to me–not forever, but periodically.

August 17, 2012 at 11:42 am

Thank you for such specific pointers, Mary! I’m in my final edit and working on a query now, so I’ll be putting this information to (hopefully) good use. Your point about not making the hook a question was new to me. I had heard that the hook should be a question to get the reader thinking. I can appreciate your response above, though, that a question would be more difficult to write. Thanks for sharing all your wisdom!

August 17, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Meghan, I think my previous response to Christine’s comment will help to provide understanding. Best wishes on your query.

August 17, 2012 at 11:47 am

Thank you for explaining the summary variations. That should help with the querying process.

August 17, 2012 at 1:44 pm

You’re welcome, Dale.

August 17, 2012 at 11:50 am

I think I have constructed nothing short of fifty possible hooks for my WIP. The tweaking of words is endless:) Now to decide on the very best one…

August 17, 2012 at 1:56 pm

I hope you enjoy the process, Lisa.

August 17, 2012 at 11:51 am

Thanks for the tips. They make sense and I’m sure they will be helpful.

Are there any hooks or hook “formulas” that are overused and therefore boring to an agent?

August 17, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Leah, the mistake I see in proposals too often is a hook that is more like a shortened version of the brief description or overview. They don’t have the “Wow, this is unique and interesting” factor.

August 17, 2012 at 11:55 am

Great tips! Thank you!

August 17, 2012 at 2:03 pm

You’re welcome, Martha.

August 17, 2012 at 12:00 pm

I kind of enjoy developing a hook and usually brainstorm with my critique buddies until I feel it’s perfect. What I dread is being asked, in person, what my hook is. Not because I can’t remember it or feel wishy-washy about my book, but because I’m conflicted on how to respond. Do I assume my dramatic, movie trailer voice and deliver my punchy but cryptic hook? Do I just tell the person what my book is about in a casual tone? Will I sound like a door-to-door sales person if I recite a memorized spiel? I tend to do whatever comes most naturally in the moment. I know that may not be the advice given at conferences, but as I talk about my writing in more varied settings, from conversations with strangers to presentations at schools, I find the more authenticity from me the better. Still, I always have that fear that when asked, I’ll either come off as Crazy Drama Girl or Flaky Rambler.

August 17, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Evangeline, as you suggested it depends on who your are talking to. Reserve your movie-trailer voice for presentations and speaking engagements. I agree that in casual conversations, authenticity is best. Use your hook paragraphs on the first page of your book as a guide for what to say. And don’t give them the ending. They’ll have to buy the book for that 🙂

August 17, 2012 at 12:05 pm

I hate hooks – I always end up pricking my fingers and bleeding all over my WIP.

That’s the hook from a story about a writer. Not really. But it should be.

Thanks for the encouragement, Becky

August 17, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Funny, Becky. I hope the tips help. Tip #9: Remove all sharp objects from the area while you work on your hook.

I spend a great deal of time thinking about the proposal hook. It helps keep me on track with the theme and purpose of the book.

So far I’m having good success with the manuscript I’ve been pitching and querying, resulting in requests for fulls. Just haven’t found the right agent yet.

August 17, 2012 at 2:25 pm

A great habit, Rachel. Thanks for sharing. This is excellent advice for all writers.

August 17, 2012 at 12:21 pm

I think hooks may be the most difficult thing for an author to write, because it’s asking us to convey in fifteen words what it took us 100,000 words to do in the book!

Randy Ingermanson had a great course on ACFW this summer and he talked about the importance of the hook. He challenged us to use 15 power-packed words, or less, to create one. I wrote my hook and then I started to trim it down, replacing less powerful words for better ones. The result was a hook that he chose as one of the top twenty-one out of hundreds submitted. I’ll share it, and his comments, as an example:

16) Gabrielle Meyer: Historical Fiction: A headstrong bride-to-be arrives in town and finds the groom is missing, but a hundred eager bachelors wait in line to change her mind.

Randy sez: And wouldn’t every girl on the planet want to be this girl? For sure. This has a lot of humor potential. Good job! There’s a strong, strong word right in the middle of this sentence that I really love. Do you see it? Take a look and try to find it before I tell you. It’s that adjective just after “hundred” and just before “bachelors”. See how that massively amps up the story?

August 17, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Well done, Gabrielle. Thanks for sharing your great example.

August 17, 2012 at 12:25 pm

Your comments, Mary, about good hooks remind me that there is never a second opportunity to make a good first impression. The moment is now. Condensing our thoughts into laser focus is more critical than ever.

August 17, 2012 at 4:43 pm

So true, Ed. And well-stated.

August 17, 2012 at 1:50 pm

Wondering, is this the same for nonfiction?

August 17, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Yes, Meadow. The tips are adaptable for both fiction and nonfiction.

August 18, 2012 at 5:08 pm

Very helpful, thank you!

August 18, 2012 at 8:03 pm

It’s almost midnight after a 14 hour road trip. I’m not sure if you’ll see this but I’ll give it a go.

Truth is terrifying, trust is dangerous and escape is impossible. With one last chance at love, will Sarah Monroe survive what it takes to live?

August 18, 2012 at 8:21 pm

Thanks for the information. One question, should the hook be part of the query as well, or just in the proposal?

August 20, 2012 at 7:06 am

I recently shared my first chapter with a writers’ group and their responses helped to crystallize the hook for me. It’s hard, as the writer, to look at the story objectively. Even when you’ve spent months working on something else!

But the writers’ group folk all asked me the same question afterwards 🙂

Here’s my hook now: Scott Black lets it slip – he’s famous – but he won’t tell Sun Geary any more than that.

November 5, 2013 at 5:30 pm

Nice hook. It begs the question, what is “it”? I’m also left wondering if the names Black and Sun are intention. And of course the obvious questions, what is he famous for and why won’t he tell her.

November 10, 2013 at 11:39 am

Your article was really helpful. Thank you so much. But there’s one doubt that has been bugging me for months. Can we use quotes in a hook?

June 19, 2014 at 7:59 pm

Can I post my hook here and ask anyone to comment? I’m struggling so bad, I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel friends are being objective. Nor are the fans of my other career. I just need a little feedback on my hook.

June 21, 2015 at 3:18 pm

I am working on my One-Sheet right now. I have completed a very rough draft of it but I don’t feel it’s strong enough. This article was very helpful and I believe you may have just saved a publisher from certain boredom.

August 15, 2015 at 10:26 am

im almost done writing my autobiography and I’m in the prosence of putting together my press kit and I was hoping that you could send me a example of a one sheet with a very good hook

September 24, 2015 at 8:28 pm

When should I start searching in google to learn to write a hook? Now before the book is finished or after when the last chapter is done and every chapters been revised and edited? Do you have any websites that can help with this? Thanks!

April 24, 2016 at 5:22 am

I’m just beginning to blog portions of my book “Out of a Secret Darkness” on my blog. I’m learning how to write along the way. It’s challenging, but the finished book will be worth the effort.

I have revised my book hook using this information. “One child suffers in the world of darkness. God’s saving grace rescues and his love transforms.” I need to shorten it a little more.

Thank You. Linda

December 15, 2016 at 11:25 am

thanks that worked a lot

January 4, 2017 at 3:33 am

my story has no major plot , no antagonist or protagonist ! what do i do !

January 27, 2017 at 12:47 pm

First figure out what character has the most at stake in the book, then think about their goals; what is it that they really want? What matters the most to them? then go though each chapter while thinking about this and fix it.

January 25, 2017 at 9:30 am

The precision of this advice is very helpful. The hardest part is reducing the hook down until it is so tight it hurts.

January 3, 2018 at 6:37 pm

Hi some agents request a proposal with specific guidelines and no separate query letter! Others ask for a query letter by itself! So I’m thinking the book hook will go in the query letter! Does the same rule apply as far as 1-2 sentence phrase?

August 30, 2019 at 6:02 am

You are so awesome! I don’t believe I’ve read a single thing like that before. So great to discover someone with unique thoughts on this issue. Really.. thank you for starting this up. This website is one thing that’s needed on the web, someone with a bit of originality!