uc graduate school personal statement

Application Essays

A personal statement or statement of purpose is a central part of any graduate admissions application.

Like a college application essay, it gives a graduate admissions committee (usually made up of program faculty and current graduate students) a chance to learn more about you beyond your grades or test scores.

Unlike a college essay, however, a personal statement or statement of purpose for graduate or professional school should highlight what interests you about the program AND what you will contribute to the program in terms of research, seminar discussions, conferences and other collaborative opportunities. It should answer two central questions:

• What interests and qualifications make you the ideal applicant for this program?
• Why are you pursuing a career in this field?

Personal Statement

A personal statement tells a story of experiences that have shaped your interest in your intended field of study and made you who you are. A personal statement is typically 500-800 words, or one to two double-spaced pages.

A Personal Statement should:

• TELL A STORY: Engage the reader. Use a writing style that is fresh and active. Don’t be afraid to use dialogue and descriptive language. Back up statements with examples and details.
• HAVE AN ANGLE: Even if your life has been less than dramatic, you still have a story to tell. Find a theme or “through line” that can unify all your paragraphs.
• PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION TO THE “LEAD”: The first paragraph will either grab the reader's attention or lose it. Use the lead to set the tone and direction for the statement. The lead can but does not have to be an attention-grabbing story. By the end of the first paragraph, the reader should know who you are and what your goal is.
• What's special, unique, distinctive, or impressive about you or your life story?
• When did you become interested in this field? What have you learned about it - and about yourself - that has further stimulated your interest and reinforced your conviction that you are well suited to this field? What insights have you gained?
• How have you learned about this field? What classes, readings, seminars, work or volunteer experiences, or conversations with people in the field have significantly advanced your knowledge or inspired you to learn more?
• If you have worked during your college years, what have you learned (leadership or managerial skills, for example), and how has that work contributed to your growth?
• What are your career goals?
• Are there any gaps or discrepancies in your academic record that you should explain (great grades but mediocre GRE scores, for example, or a distinct upward pattern to your GPA if it was only average in the beginning)?
• Have you had to overcome any unusual obstacles or hardships (for example, economic, familial, or physical) in your life?
• What personal characteristics (for example, integrity, compassion, and/or persistence) do you possess that would improve your prospects for success in the field or profession? Is there a way to demonstrate or document that you have these characteristics?
• What skills (for example, leadership, communicative, analytical) do you possess?
• Why might you be a stronger candidate for graduate school – and more successful and effective in the profession or field – than other applicants?
• What are the most compelling reasons you can give for the admissions committee to be interested in you?

Tell a story

Think in terms of showing or demonstrating through concrete experience. If your statement is fresh, lively and different, you'll put yourself ahead of the pack. If you distinguish yourself through your story, you will make yourself memorable.

Be specific

Your desire to become a lawyer, engineer or whatever should be logical – the result of specific experience that is described in your statement. Your application should emerge as the logical conclusion to your story.

Find an angle

If you're like most people, your life story lacks drama, so figuring out a way to make it interesting becomes the big challenge. Find an angle or "hook."

Concentrate on your opening paragraph

This paragraph is the most important. Grab the reader's attention.

Tell what you know

The middle section of your essay should detail your interest and experience in your field. Be specific in relating what you know about it and use the language professionals use. Refer to work experiences, research, classes, conversations with people in the field, books you’ve read, seminars you've attended, or any other source of information about the career you want and why you're suited to it. Your choices of what to include and what to leave out will indicate your overall judgment.

Leave out some subjects

Certain things are best left out of personal statements. For example, references to experiences or accomplishments in high school or earlier are generally not relevant. Don't mention potentially controversial subjects (for example, controversial religious or political views).

Do some research

Many schools want to know why you're applying there rather than elsewhere. Do some research to find out what sets your choice apart from other universities or programs. If the school setting would provide an important geographical or cultural change for you, this might be a factor to mention.

Be meticulous. Type and proofread your essay very carefully. Many admissions officers say that good writing skills are important. Express yourself clearly and concisely. Stick to the word limits.

Statement of Purpose

In contrast to a personal statement, a statement of purpose focuses on your reasons for applying. It should discuss your professional, intellectual and research interests and the expertise you have gained.

A Statement of Purpose should:

• SHOW THAT YOU KNOW SOMETHING: The main section explains what you know and who you are. Show knowledge of your field (e.g., a specific research focus) or your profession. Show how you will impact the field, or what has impacted you in the pursuit of your field.
• FOCUS ON YOUR SPECIFIC RESEARCH or PROFESSIONAL INTERESTS WITHIN YOUR FIELD: Detail how your academic and professional experiences have developed your research or professional interests and prepared you to pursue them at a higher academic level. Include courses, experts whose work you admire or whose work aligns with your interests, and factors such as internship opportunities or opportunities afforded by the school’s location.
• MATCH YOUR RESEARCH INTERESTS with the PROGRAM: Explain how your research interests can be pursued at this program and this institution.

General Guidelines for Both Personal Statements and Statements of Purpose

Whether you are writing a Personal Statement or Statement of Purpose:

• Answer the questions that are asked: Lots of schools may ask for similar information, but not all are the same. Use different statements for different schools, depending on the requirements.
• Leave out some topics: Accomplishments from high school are probably not relevant. Also, avoid controversial subjects. Your choice of content indicates your maturity and judgment.
• Avoid clichés: Saying “I like science” or “I want to help people” isn't specific enough to warrant pursuing a graduate or professional degree.
• Do your research: What sets this program apart? Why does this program attract you?
• Stay focused on what you can offer: What can you offer them?
• Edit and proofread: Be meticulous and thorough with your editing. Type and proofread your essay carefully. Many admissions officers say good writing skills are important. Express yourself clearly and concisely. Stick to the word limits.
• Watch out for "I" statements: Be careful not to begin every statement with “I.” One way to vary sentence beginnings is to focus on the program and the field.
• Don’t simply list or tell stories about all the points that can be found in your resume or CV.
• Avoid sounding defensive or self-pitying. Instead, take responsibility for challenging or difficult life circumstances and show how you have grown as a person and as a potential candidate.
• Don’t preach to your reader or tell them things they already know. For example, don’t summarize the research of a professor in the program you are applying to; they know this already.
• Avoid talking about money as a motivating factor in your decision process.

Some of this page content was adapted from "Writing Personal Statements" by the UCLA Undergraduate Writing Center.

How to Write a Strong Personal Statement for Graduate School

• by Heidi Kerr and Paul David Terry
• November 10, 2020

You’ve made the exciting decision to pursue a graduate degree. Congratulations! There are a wide range of graduate programs to explore , and once you’ve selected the right program for you, it’s time to begin the graduate application process. 

The statement of purpose and personal history statement are key components of the UC Davis graduate school application . With fewer than 4,000 characters allowed for each essay, these statements can seem particularly daunting. However, each one has a specific purpose for showcasing your academic journey and creating a holistic application.

Below, we’ve analyzed the differences between the statement of purpose and personal history statement and provided tips for writing these graduate school admissions essays. 

Statement of Purpose and Personal History: What’s the Difference?

The statement of purpose shares your academic objectives with the admissions committee and explains why you want to obtain a graduate degree. The personal history statement provides background about who you are and how your experiences have shaped your interests and ability to overcome challenges. Each essay has specific goals to showcase your experience, passion and story. 

How to Write a Strong Statement of Purpose

The statement of purpose should highlight your academic preparation , motivation and interests, along with any specializations and career goals that contribute to your program of study. As you write your statement of purpose, it should encompass some of the following:

• Academic and research experiences - Include any relevant academic studies or research pursuits, internships or employment, presentations, publications, teaching, and travel or study abroad experiences that prepare you for this graduate program. Explain your motivation or passion for these experiences and how they can enrich your graduate study.
• Interests, specializations, and career goals - Highlight your research interests, disciplinary subfields, area(s) of specialization, and professional objectives.
• Fit - Explain how your preparation, experiences, and interests match the specific resources and characteristics of your graduate program at UC Davis. Identify specific faculty within your desired graduate program with whom you would like to work and how their interests match your own.

The statement of purpose should also address why you want to pursue the particular graduate degree program at the university and what your goals are in pursuing a degree. Remember, the statement of purpose should explain exactly that, your purpose for becoming a graduate student. This is the primary way it stands apart from your personal history statement. 

What to Include in Your Personal History Statement

The personal history statement helps the reader learn more about you as an individual and potential graduate student. Use this opportunity to describe how your personal background informs your decision to pursue a graduate degree. Tell a story that  includes any experiences, challenges or opportunities relevant to your academic journey. Consider how your life experiences contribute to the social, intellectual, or cultural diversity within a campus community and your chosen field.

A strong personal history statement begins with an authentic voice and personal narrative. This can reflect your journey to graduate school, any obstacles you’ve encountered, and how you've overcome challenges. Talk about your personal goals and dreams. Explain what motivates and drives you toward this degree. The more your personal statement tells your school about you as an individual, the more it will stand out. Don't write something to impress someone else. This includes language, style and tone. Authenticity is important and resonates well. Tell the truth, in your voice, from your perspective. Use your story to connect.

More Tips and Resources for Applying to Graduate School

Applying to graduate school may be daunting to some, but UC Davis has a variety of resources to help you create a strong graduate school application. Check out the Applying to Graduate School: A Guide and Handbook for ideas and worksheets on how to construct your essays. Or visit our Office of Educational Opportunity and Enrichment Services website for more graduate school prep resources. 

Paul David Terry is the assistant director of special interest and affinity networks and alumni diversity lead at the Cal Aggie Alumni Association. He oversees the UC Davis Health Improving OUTcomes blog and enjoys cycling and brewing ginger beer.

Heidi Kerr works as the content and media manager at UC Davis’ Graduate Studies. She has worked as a communications professional at multiple higher education institutions and is passionate about promoting student success.

The authors acknowledge current and former leaders from Pre-Graduate/Law Advising in Office of Educational Opportunity and Enrichment Services, especially Annalisa Teixeira, Ph.D. and Cloe Le Gall-Scoville, Ph.D., who granted us permission to reference Applying to Graduate School: A Guide and Workbook .

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Writing the Statement of Purpose

The statement of purpose should convince the admissions committee that your achievements show promise for your success in graduate study. Think of the statement of purpose as a composition with four different parts.

Make sure to check on the appropriate departmental website to find out if your statement should include additional or specific information.

Part 1: Introduce yourself, your interests and motivations

Tell them what you’re interested in, and perhaps, what sparked your desire for graduate study. This should be short and to the point; don’t spend a great deal of time on autobiography.

Part 2: Summarize your undergraduate and previous graduate career

a) Research you conducted. Indicate with whom, the title of the project, what your responsibilities were, and the outcome. Write technically, or in the style of your discipline. Faculty are the people who read these statements.

b) Important paper or thesis project you completed, as well as anything scholarly beyond your curricular requirements.

c) Work experience, especially if you had any kind of responsibility for testing, designing, researching or interning in an area similar to what you wish to study in graduate school.

Part 3: Discuss the relevance of your recent and current activities

If you graduated and worked prior to returning to graduate school, indicate what you’ve been doing: company or non-profit, your work/design team, responsibilities, what you learned. You can also indicate here how this helped you focus your graduate studies.

Part 4: Elaborate on your academic interests

Here you indicate what you would like to study in graduate school in enough detail to convince the faculty that you understand the scope of research in their discipline, and are engaged with current research themes.

a) Indicate the area of your interests. Ideally, pose a question, define a problem, or indicate a theme that you would like to address, and questions that arise from contemporary research. This should be an ample paragraph!

b) Look on the web for information about departments you’re interested in, including professors and their research. Are there professors whose research interests parallel yours? If so, indicate this. Check the specific program; many may require you to name a professor or professors with whom you might work.

c) End your statement in a positive manner, indicating your excitement and readiness for the challenges ahead of you.

Essential Tips

1. What the admissions committee will read between the lines: self-motivation, competence, potential as a graduate student.

2. Emphasize everything from a positive perspective and write in an active, not a passive voice.

3. Demonstrate everything by example; don’t say directly that you’re a persistent person, show it.

4. If there is something important that happened to you that affected your grades, such as poverty, illness, or excessive work, state it. Write it affirmatively, showing your perseverance despite obstacles. You can elaborate more in your personal statement.

5. Make sure everything is linked with continuity and focus.

6. Unless the specific program says otherwise, be concise; an ideal essay should say everything it needs to with brevity. Approximately 500 to 1000 well-selected words (1-2 single space pages in 12 point font) is better than more words with less clarity and poor organization.

Statement of purpose

The statement of purpose is a short essay that should be customized for each program you apply to. it will be evaluated by the graduate program faculty, so present yourself as someone who will be a good fit for the program., crafting a strong statement of purpose.

Your statement of purpose is an important part of your UC graduate school application. Be sure to write a polished essay so you'll make a good first impression when you apply. Each application is different, but a good Statement of Purpose shouuld contain the following elements: 

• Introduction: Indicate the degree you want to earn and the topic you want to study. Describe your research and how graduate school will help you reach your career goals, as well as the contribution you will make to the program.
• Accomplishments: Summarize your achievements, including research projects, classes or work that stimulated your desire for graduate studies during your undergraduate or master’s career.
• Referrals: If you've received encouragement from professors in the program you would like to enter, mention that as well.
• Format: Modify your statement of purpose for each application you submit, carefully following the guidelines and instructions, which may vary from program to program. Typically, your essay should be one to two pages, single-spaced, using a 12-point font that's easy to read; but make sure to confirm the institutions formatting requirements. Proofread to make sure there are no typos or grammatical errors.

A few writing helpful tips

Writing a statement of purpose can be intimidating, but the following tips can help you create a strong statment that highlights your readiness to begin your graduate education. 

• Address your audience: Your primary audience is the faculty in the program to which you are applying. Treat your statement of purpose as an application to work with a specific professor in that department or scholarly field. Be compelling and clear.
• Provide specific examples: Rather than simply saying you are a high achiever, for example, describe a project on which you exceeded a professor’s expectations. If your grades suffered because of a misfortune, such as an illness, explain how you persevered. You can describe a mistake that taught you a valuable lesson — but don’t make excuses. Be positive and concise.

“I want to ensure that we have nutritious food to eat now and in the future. Studying in California and at UC Davis, I am able to work at the forefront of technology, science and service to the community.”

Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School: Good, Bad, & Everything In Between

Your personal statement should demonstrate that you have thought deeply about why you are making the decision to go to grad school and that you are an excellent fit for your target school. Sounds a little challenging? Don’t worry, these personal statement examples will break down the strategy of writing a strong graduate school application.

Comparing Graduate School Personal Statement Examples

Below I will share types of personal statement examples: one with a strong writing approach and one that lacks clarity and may cause confusion for an admissions committee reader. Then I will describe the strengths and weaknesses of each example.

Introduction Paragraph Examples:

Ex. 1-Strong) The ocean is as fundamental to our lives as any other ecological habitat, so why don’t we have systems in place to treat it that way? Growing up in Monterey, California I was first introduced to marine biology through my advanced placement biology class. While in community college I helped form a student-led monthly beach clean-up team. This rewarding experience led me to pursue an undergraduate degree in Biology with an emphasis in ocean preservation. My passion for developing innovative and culturally informed approaches to marine preservation on a global scale have led me to pursue a doctorate in the field of marine biology. My desired research focus will explore solutions to the impacts of micro plastics in our ocean.

Ex. 2-Weak) Yea sure, the ocean is in a devastated condition, but what are we going to do about it? Well, with my degree in bio I plan to get a PhD in marine biology to help figure out how to address micro plastics in our ocean. I know so much already, and I just know that with a PhD I will be able to contribute on a greater scale. I know the PhD is a lot of work, but I am pretty sure I will be able to complete the program and have a great time doing so. I have always wanted to live in Santa Barbara, and that is definitely a part of my decision to apply to your program.

Diving Deeper Into Personal Statement Introductions

So, let’s discuss the strengths and weaknesses of the example introductions above!

• Throughout the paragraph the applicant demonstrates that they have been involved with marine biology since high school, this is important because it demonstrates their commitment to the field early on in the essay
• The applicant mentions a desire to live in Santa Barbara, while it may be true, it is not a strong enough reason to pursue a PhD and signals to the admissions committee that you may be pursuing the program for the wrong reasons. Keep details like this out of your personal statement and focus on reasons for applying that are academically motivated.

Conclusion Paragraph Examples:

Ex. 1-Strong) As a first generation college student, and an English language learner, my journey to receive my bachelors of science in marine biology has been tough. Along the way I have developed leadership skills, research and lab experience, as well as a refined passion for the work that marine biologists are able to do when informed by the local community members. I desire to continue my studies with an emphasis on ocean preservation research through the innovative and unique PhD program offered at UC Santa Barbara. It would be an honor to work with Dr. Jonas Mendoza and Dr. Raquel Pacheco, two professors whose work aligns with my research interests and who have been welcoming and encouraging through our email correspondence. While my research goals are ambitious, I am confident that your program offers the resources and mentorship required for a unified effort to resolve the impact that microplastics have on not only human life, but all marine animals and ecosystems.

Ex2. -Weak) I think it’s a miracle that I even completed my B.S degree! That’s how I know that with the funding and laid back atmosphere at UC Santa Barbara I can definitely complete the PhD. I’m not so interested in the teaching part, or the amount of course work I would be required to take, but I just know that once I get out there and get into the water, it will all be worth it. My research experience is competitive and top-notch, I am a great person to work with and easily make friends. I am hopeful to hear back and excited for the next steps! Thanks for reading this far.

Exploring Personal Statement Conclusions

• The applicant concludes by mentioning the importance of a “unified effort” for their research goals. This goes a long way to demonstrate that they understand how important collaborative effort is. This helps make an applicant more attractive in the eyes of an admissions committee that must also consider the work ethic of all applicants.
• The applicant describes their research experience as “competitive and top-notch”, even if you have the most impressive curriculum vitae focus on instead listing what you have done, with who and what they outcomes were and let the admissions committee decide how they interpret it.

So, what makes a good personal statement?

Your personal statement will be one of many that an admissions committee will read to assess who its strongest applicants are. you have to remember that the committee members do not get to meet you before they read your application materials. you cannot risk leaving out crucial information. oftentimes, students struggle to talk about themselves, they see it as “bragging” or “showing off”. it is important that you overcome your discomfort and realize that the personal statement is essentially the first impression you will make on the committee. make the most of the opportunity to introduce yourself and make sure to address the following:.

• Why now? Admissions committees have been through graduate school. They know better than anyone that graduate school is not a choice one makes simply because “you don’t know what else to do”. Demonstrate that you are prepared for the commitment and the work by specifying why you have decided that graduate school is the best option for you at this time and that your current and past experiences align with your intentions if admitted into the program.

A good personal statement will address all of these questions and be mindful about appropriate boundaries with each. Ultimately, it will demonstrate to the committee that you are prepared for the program, that you are likely to succeed if admitted, and that you are passionate about and committed to pursuing a career in which the training and the degree that you will receive is imperative to your future goals.

The importance of a clear narrative:

A clear narrative will allow for the admissions committee to extract the necessary information about you without any hassle. Remember that you are one applicant amongst many, when writing your personal statement do not assume that your reader will know the importance of any information or the necessary context if you do not provide these details for them. Consider these tips when writing:

• Do not overestimate the importance of proofreading! Read your essays out loud and record the audio while doing it. Does it flow? Does it answer every question provided in the prompt (if provided one)? I recommend finding at least one person who is in graduate school and preferably within your field to read your essay.

Summary and Major Takeaways

The personal statement is usually just 1-2 pages. With a document this short and with so much importance towards your chances of admission, every word matters! Consider these takeaways and do your research at every stage of the writing process.

Do this before you get to writing. Gather information from this blog post, the program’s official website, any correspondence between you and professors or graduate students at each program you will be applying to, and develop a document that lists every experience and detail you wish to include. Use this as a reference as you write so that you are certain you are hitting every point.

Do not skip this step! Seek out support from current graduate students or a writing service for some feedback. Double check for any language that is too casual, or can be off putting or concerning to anyone who will review your application.

Remember that admissions committees are made up of real people who read an unbelievable amount of applications. Do your best to stand out, really think about what sets you apart and what skills you have developed throughout your life that are relevant to the program you are pursuing. After you have your first draft, focus on language and phrases that are both professional and captivating to your reader. Sprinkle in some flare! For more examples, visit our blog to see more personal statement examples that got their writers into graduate programs!

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Gre prep online guides and tips, 3 successful graduate school personal statement examples.

Looking for grad school personal statement examples? Look no further! In this total guide to graduate school personal statement examples, we’ll discuss why you need a personal statement for grad school and what makes a good one. Then we’ll provide three graduate school personal statement samples from our grad school experts. After that, we’ll do a deep dive on one of our personal statement for graduate school examples. Finally, we’ll wrap up with a list of other grad school personal statements you can find online.

Why Do You Need a Personal Statement?

A personal statement is a chance for admissions committees to get to know you: your goals and passions, what you’ll bring to the program, and what you’re hoping to get out of the program.  You need to sell the admissions committee on what makes you a worthwhile applicant. The personal statement is a good chance to highlight significant things about you that don’t appear elsewhere on your application.

A personal statement is slightly different from a statement of purpose (also known as a letter of intent). A statement of purpose/letter of intent tends to be more tightly focused on your academic or professional credentials and your future research and/or professional interests.

While a personal statement also addresses your academic experiences and goals, you have more leeway to be a little more, well, personal. In a personal statement, it’s often appropriate to include information on significant life experiences or challenges that aren’t necessarily directly relevant to your field of interest.

Some programs ask for both a personal statement and a statement of purpose/letter of intent. In this case, the personal statement is likely to be much more tightly focused on your life experience and personality assets while the statement of purpose will focus in much more on your academic/research experiences and goals.

However, there’s not always a hard-and-fast demarcation between a personal statement and a statement of purpose. The two statement types should address a lot of the same themes, especially as relates to your future goals and the valuable assets you bring to the program. Some programs will ask for a personal statement but the prompt will be focused primarily on your research and professional experiences and interests. Some will ask for a statement of purpose but the prompt will be more focused on your general life experiences.

When in doubt, give the program what they are asking for in the prompt and don’t get too hung up on whether they call it a personal statement or statement of purpose. You can always call the admissions office to get more clarification on what they want you to address in your admissions essay.

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What Makes a Good Grad School Personal Statement?

A great graduate school personal statement can come in many forms and styles. However, strong grad school personal statement examples all share the same following elements:

A Clear Narrative

Above all, a good personal statement communicates clear messages about what makes you a strong applicant who is likely to have success in graduate school. So to that extent, think about a couple of key points that you want to communicate about yourself and then drill down on how you can best communicate those points. (Your key points should of course be related to what you can bring to the field and to the program specifically).

You can also decide whether to address things like setbacks or gaps in your application as part of your narrative. Have a low GPA for a couple semesters due to a health issue? Been out of a job for a while taking care of a family member? If you do decide to explain an issue like this, make sure that the overall arc is more about demonstrating positive qualities like resilience and diligence than about providing excuses.

Specific Examples

A great statement of purpose uses specific examples to illustrate its key messages. This can include anecdotes that demonstrate particular traits or even references to scholars and works that have influenced your academic trajectory to show that you are familiar and insightful about the relevant literature in your field.

Just saying “I love plants,” is pretty vague. Describing how you worked in a plant lab during undergrad and then went home and carefully cultivated your own greenhouse where you cross-bred new flower colors by hand is much more specific and vivid, which makes for better evidence.

A strong personal statement will describe why you are a good fit for the program, and why the program is a good fit for you. It’s important to identify specific things about the program that appeal to you, and how you’ll take advantage of those opportunities. It’s also a good idea to talk about specific professors you might be interested in working with. This shows that you are informed about and genuinely invested in the program.

Strong Writing

Even quantitative and science disciplines typically require some writing, so it’s important that your personal statement shows strong writing skills. Make sure that you are communicating clearly and that you don’t have any grammar and spelling errors. It’s helpful to get other people to read your statement and provide feedback. Plan on going through multiple drafts.

Another important thing here is to avoid cliches and gimmicks. Don’t deploy overused phrases and openings like “ever since I was a child.” Don’t structure your statement in a gimmicky way (i.e., writing a faux legal brief about yourself for a law school statement of purpose). The first will make your writing banal; the second is likely to make you stand out in a bad way.

Appropriate Boundaries

While you can be more personal in a personal statement than in a statement of purpose, it’s important to maintain appropriate boundaries in your writing. Don’t overshare anything too personal about relationships, bodily functions, or illegal activities. Similarly, don’t share anything that makes it seem like you may be out of control, unstable, or an otherwise risky investment. The personal statement is not a confessional booth. If you share inappropriately, you may seem like you have bad judgment, which is a huge red flag to admissions committees.

You should also be careful with how you deploy humor and jokes. Your statement doesn’t have to be totally joyless and serious, but bear in mind that the person reading the statement may not have the same sense of humor as you do. When in doubt, err towards the side of being as inoffensive as possible.

Just as being too intimate in your statement can hurt you, it’s also important not to be overly formal or staid. You should be professional, but conversational.

Graduate School Personal Statement Examples

Our graduate school experts have been kind enough to provide some successful grad school personal statement examples. We’ll provide three examples here, along with brief analysis of what makes each one successful.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 1

PDF of Sample Personal Statement 1 – Japanese Studies

For this Japanese Studies master’s degree, the applicant had to provide a statement of purpose outlining her academic goals and experience with Japanese and a separate personal statement describing her personal relationship with Japanese Studies and what led her to pursue a master’s degree.

Here’s what’s successful about this personal statement:

• An attention-grabbing beginning: The applicant begins with the statement that Japanese has never come easily to her and that it’s a brutal language to learn. Seeing as how this is an application for a Japanese Studies program, this is an intriguing beginning that makes the reader want to keep going.
• A compelling narrative: From this attention-grabbing beginning, the applicant builds a well-structured and dramatic narrative tracking her engagement with the Japanese language over time. The clear turning point is her experience studying abroad, leading to a resolution in which she has clarity about her plans. Seeing as how the applicant wants to be a translator of Japanese literature, the tight narrative structure here is a great way to show her writing skills.
• Specific examples that show important traits: The applicant clearly communicates both a deep passion for Japanese through examples of her continued engagement with Japanese and her determination and work ethic by highlighting the challenges she’s faced (and overcome) in her study of the language. This gives the impression that she is an engaged and dedicated student.

Overall, this is a very strong statement both in terms of style and content. It flows well, is memorable, and communicates that the applicant would make the most of the graduate school experience.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 2

PDF of Sample Graduate School Personal Statement 2 – Musical Composition

This personal statement for a Music Composition master’s degree discusses the factors that motivate the applicant to pursue graduate study.

Here’s what works well in this statement:

• The applicant provides two clear reasons motivating the student to pursue graduate study: her experiences with music growing up, and her family’s musical history. She then supports those two reasons with examples and analysis.
• The description of her ancestors’ engagement with music is very compelling and memorable. The applicant paints her own involvement with music as almost inevitable based on her family’s long history with musical pursuits.
• The applicant gives thoughtful analysis of the advantages she has been afforded that have allowed her to study music so extensively. We get the sense that she is insightful and empathetic—qualities that would add greatly to any academic community.

This is a strong, serviceable personal statement. And in truth, given that this for a masters in music composition, other elements of the application (like work samples) are probably the most important.  However, here are two small changes I would make to improve it:

• I would probably to split the massive second paragraph into 2-3 separate paragraphs. I might use one paragraph to orient the reader to the family’s musical history, one paragraph to discuss Giacomo and Antonio, and one paragraph to discuss how the family has influenced the applicant. As it stands, it’s a little unwieldy and the second paragraph doesn’t have a super-clear focus even though it’s all loosely related to the applicant’s family history with music.
• I would also slightly shorten the anecdote about the applicant’s ancestors and expand more on how this family history has motivated the applicant’s interest in music. In what specific ways has her ancestors’ perseverance inspired her? Did she think about them during hard practice sessions? Is she interested in composing music in a style they might have played? More specific examples here would lend greater depth and clarity to the statement.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 3

PDF of Sample Graduate School Personal Statement 3 – Public Health

This is my successful personal statement for Columbia’s Master’s program in Public Health. We’ll do a deep dive on this statement paragraph-by-paragraph in the next section, but I’ll highlight a couple of things that work in this statement here:

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• This statement is clearly organized. Almost every paragraph has a distinct focus and message, and when I move on to a new idea, I move on to a new paragraph with a logical transitions.
• This statement covers a lot of ground in a pretty short space. I discuss my family history, my goals, my educational background, and my professional background. But because the paragraphs are organized and I use specific examples, it doesn’t feel too vague or scattered.
• In addition to including information about my personal motivations, like my family, I also include some analysis about tailoring health interventions with my example of the Zande. This is a good way to show off what kinds of insights I might bring to the program based on my academic background.

Grad School Personal Statement Example: Deep Dive

Now let’s do a deep dive, paragraph-by-paragraph, on one of these sample graduate school personal statements. We’ll use my personal statement that I used when I applied to Columbia’s public health program.

Paragraph One: For twenty-three years, my grandmother (a Veterinarian and an Epidemiologist) ran the Communicable Disease Department of a mid-sized urban public health department. The stories of Grandma Betty doggedly tracking down the named sexual partners of the infected are part of our family lore. Grandma Betty would persuade people to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases, encourage safer sexual practices, document the spread of infection and strive to contain and prevent it. Indeed, due to the large gay population in the city where she worked, Grandma Betty was at the forefront of the AIDS crises, and her analysis contributed greatly towards understanding how the disease was contracted and spread. My grandmother has always been a huge inspiration to me, and the reason why a career in public health was always on my radar.

This is an attention-grabbing opening anecdote that avoids most of the usual cliches about childhood dreams and proclivities. This story also subtly shows that I have a sense of public health history, given the significance of the AIDs crisis for public health as a field.

It’s good that I connect this family history to my own interests. However, if I were to revise this paragraph again, I might cut down on some of the detail because when it comes down to it, this story isn’t really about me. It’s important that even (sparingly used) anecdotes about other people ultimately reveal something about you in a personal statement.

Paragraph Two: Recent years have cemented that interest. In January 2012, my parents adopted my little brother Fred from China. Doctors in America subsequently diagnosed Fred with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy (DMD). My parents were told that if Fred’s condition had been discovered in China, the (very poor) orphanage in which he spent the first 8+ years of his life would have recognized his DMD as a death sentence and denied him sustenance to hasten his demise.

Here’s another compelling anecdote to help explain my interest in public health. This is an appropriately personal detail for a personal statement—it’s a serious thing about my immediate family, but it doesn’t disclose anything that the admissions committee might find concerning or inappropriate.

If I were to take another pass through this paragraph, the main thing I would change is the last phrase. “Denied him sustenance to hasten his demise” is a little flowery. “Denied him food to hasten his death” is actually more powerful because it’s clearer and more direct.

Paragraph Three: It is not right that some people have access to the best doctors and treatment while others have no medical care. I want to pursue an MPH in Sociomedical Sciences at Columbia because studying social factors in health, with a particular focus on socio-health inequities, will prepare me to address these inequities. The interdisciplinary approach of the program appeals to me greatly as I believe interdisciplinary approaches are the most effective way to develop meaningful solutions to complex problems.

In this paragraph I make a neat and clear transition from discussing what sparked my interest in public health and health equity to what I am interested in about Columbia specifically: the interdisciplinary focus of the program, and how that focus will prepare me to solve complex health problems. This paragraph also serves as a good pivot point to start discussing my academic and professional background.

Paragraph Four: My undergraduate education has prepared me well for my chosen career. Understanding the underlying structure of a group’s culture is essential to successfully communicating with the group. In studying folklore and mythology, I’ve learned how to parse the unspoken structures of folk groups, and how those structures can be used to build bridges of understanding. For example, in a culture where most illnesses are believed to be caused by witchcraft, as is the case for the Zande people of central Africa, any successful health intervention or education program would of necessity take into account their very real belief in witchcraft.

In this paragraph, I link my undergraduate education and the skills I learned there to public health. The (very brief) analysis of tailoring health interventions to the Zande is a good way to show insight and show off the competencies I would bring to the program.

Paragraph Five: I now work in the healthcare industry for one of the largest providers of health benefits in the world. In addition to reigniting my passion for data and quantitative analytics, working for this company has immersed me in the business side of healthcare, a critical component of public health.

This brief paragraph highlights my relevant work experience in the healthcare industry. It also allows me to mention my work with data and quantitative analytics, which isn’t necessarily obvious from my academic background, which was primarily based in the social sciences.

Paragraph Six: I intend to pursue a PhD in order to become an expert in how social factors affect health, particularly as related to gender and sexuality. I intend to pursue a certificate in Sexuality, Sexual Health, and Reproduction. Working together with other experts to create effective interventions across cultures and societies, I want to help transform health landscapes both in America and abroad.

This final paragraph is about my future plans and intentions. Unfortunately, it’s a little disjointed, primarily because I discuss goals of pursuing a PhD before I talk about what certificate I want to pursue within the MPH program! Switching those two sentences and discussing my certificate goals within the MPH and then mentioning my PhD plans would make a lot more sense.

I also start two sentences in a row with “I intend,” which is repetitive.

The final sentence is a little bit generic; I might tailor it to specifically discuss a gender and sexual health issue, since that is the primary area of interest I’ve identified.

This was a successful personal statement; I got into (and attended!) the program. It has strong examples, clear organization, and outlines what interests me about the program (its interdisciplinary focus) and what competencies I would bring (a background in cultural analysis and experience with the business side of healthcare). However, a few slight tweaks would elevate this statement to the next level.

Graduate School Personal Statement Examples You Can Find Online

So you need more samples for your personal statement for graduate school? Examples are everywhere on the internet, but they aren’t all of equal quality.

Most of examples are posted as part of writing guides published online by educational institutions. We’ve rounded up some of the best ones here if you are looking for more personal statement examples for graduate school.

Penn State Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School

This selection of ten short personal statements for graduate school and fellowship programs offers an interesting mix of approaches. Some focus more on personal adversity while others focus more closely on professional work within the field.

The writing in some of these statements is a little dry, and most deploy at least a few cliches. However, these are generally strong, serviceable statements that communicate clearly why the student is interested in the field, their skills and competencies, and what about the specific program appeals to them.

Cal State Sample Graduate School Personal Statements

These are good examples of personal statements for graduate school where students deploy lots of very vivid imagery and illustrative anecdotes of life experiences. There are also helpful comments about what works in each of these essays.

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However, all of these statements are definitely pushing the boundaries of acceptable length, as all are above 1000 and one is almost 1500 words! Many programs limit you to 500 words; if you don’t have a limit, you should try to keep it to two single-spaced pages at most (which is about 1000 words).

University of Chicago Personal Statement for Graduate School Examples

These examples of successful essays to the University of Chicago law school cover a wide range of life experiences and topics. The writing in all is very vivid, and all communicate clear messages about the students’ strengths and competencies.

Note, however, that these are all essays that specifically worked for University of Chicago law school. That does not mean that they would work everywhere. In fact, one major thing to note is that many of these responses, while well-written and vivid, barely address the students’ interest in law school at all! This is something that might not work well for most graduate programs.

Wheaton College Personal Statement for Graduate School Sample 10

This successful essay for law school from a Wheaton College undergraduate does a great job tracking the student’s interest in the law in a compelling and personal way. Wheaton offers other graduate school personal statement examples, but this one offers the most persuasive case for the students’ competencies. The student accomplishes this by using clear, well-elaborated examples, showing strong and vivid writing, and highlighting positive qualities like an interest in justice and empathy without seeming grandiose or out of touch.

Wheaton College Personal Statement for Graduate School Sample 1

Based on the background information provided at the bottom of the essay, this essay was apparently successful for this applicant. However, I’ve actually included this essay because it demonstrates an extremely risky approach. While this personal statement is strikingly written and the story is very memorable, it could definitely communicate the wrong message to some admissions committees. The student’s decision not to report the drill sergeant may read incredibly poorly to some admissions committees. They may wonder if the student’s failure to report the sergeant’s violence will ultimately expose more soldiers-in-training to the same kinds of abuses. This incident perhaps reads especially poorly in light of the fact that the military has such a notable problem with violence against women being covered up and otherwise mishandled

It’s actually hard to get a complete picture of the student’s true motivations from this essay, and what we have might raise real questions about the student’s character to some admissions committees. This student took a risk and it paid off, but it could have just as easily backfired spectacularly.

Key Takeaways: Graduate School Personal Statement Examples

In this guide, we discussed why you need a personal statement and how it differs from a statement of purpose. (It’s more personal!)

We also discussed what you’ll find in a strong sample personal statement for graduate school:

• A clear narrative about the applicant and why they are qualified for graduate study.
• Specific examples to support that narrative.
• Compelling reasons why the applicant and the program are a good fit for each other.
• Strong writing, including clear organization and error-free, cliche-free language.
• Appropriate boundaries—sharing without over-sharing.

Then, we provided three strong graduate school personal statement examples for different fields, along with analysis. We did a deep-dive on the third statement.

Finally, we provided a list of other sample grad school personal statements online.

What’s Next?

Want more advice on writing a personal statement ? See our guide.

Writing a graduate school statement of purpose? See our statement of purpose samples  and a nine-step process for writing the best statement of purpose possible .

If you’re writing a graduate school CV or resume, see our how-to guide to writing a CV , a how-to guide to writing a resume , our list of sample resumes and CVs , resume and CV templates , and a special guide for writing resume objectives .

Need stellar graduate school recommendation letters ? See our guide.

See our 29 tips for successfully applying to graduate school .

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Author: Ellen McCammon

Ellen is a public health graduate student and education expert. She has extensive experience mentoring students of all ages to reach their goals and in-depth knowledge on a variety of health topics. View all posts by Ellen McCammon

How to Write a Stand-Out Personal Statement for Your Graduate School Application

While deciding to embark on the path to graduate school is an exciting first step toward advancing your career, the application process can sometimes feel daunting and confusing.

One major part of the application that most schools require is a personal statement. Writing a personal statement can be an arduous task: After all, most people don’t necessarily enjoy writing about themselves, let alone at length.

A compelling personal statement, however, can help bring your application to the top of the admissions pile. Below, we’ve outlined what you need to know about crafting a personal statement to make your application shine.

What Is a Personal Statement?

The point of a personal statement is for the admissions board to gain a deeper understanding of who you are apart from your education and work experience. It explains why you’re the right fit for the program and a worthwhile applicant. It’s also an opportunity to highlight important factors that may not be readily available in the rest of your application.

A personal statement is different from a statement of purpose (if you’re asked for that as well). A statement of purpose will touch on your academic and career goals, as well as your past credentials. While those should also be discussed in your personal statement, it’s more about your life experiences and how they’ve shaped you and your journey to graduate school.

Questions to Ask Yourself Before Writing a Personal Statement

Before you start crafting your essay, there are a few prompts you can ask yourself to help clarify what you want to accomplish.

• What are the key points you want to communicate about yourself?
• What personal characteristics or skills do you have that make you a strong candidate for this field?
• What exactly are your career goals, and how does graduate school play into them?
• What have you learned about this field already? When did you first choose to follow this path, and what do you enjoy about it?
• What do you think is important for the admissions board to know specifically about you?
• Are there any discrepancies or causes for concern in your application you need to address? For example, is there a career and schooling gap, or a low GPA at one point? This is the time to discuss whether a personal hardship may have affected your academics or career.
• Have you dealt with any unusual obstacles or difficulties in your life? How have they affected and shaped you?
• What sets you apart and makes you unique from other graduate school applicants?
• What factors in your life have brought you to where you are today?

Top Tips for Writing a Graduate School Personal Statement

Pick a few points to emphasize about yourself . Introduce yourself to the admissions board. Select key factors about your background that you want the university to know — elements that reveal what kind of person you are and demonstrate why you’re a strong candidate for the school and field of study.

Be very specific . Again, a personal statement is all about communicating what distinguishes you from other applicants. To accomplish that, you need to share specific anecdotes that underscore your statements. If you say you’re a strong leader, present an example of a time you’ve proven that skill through work, school or your personal life. These specific, personal stories provide a deeper understanding of who you are and prove your intentions.

Do your research . Demonstrate what attracted you to the program. If there is a specific faculty member or class that caught your attention, or another aspect of the program that greatly interests you, convey it. This shows you’ve truly researched the school and have a passion for the program.

“Whatever the topic may be, I would recommend writing in a manner that reflects or parallels the institution’s and/or department’s missions, goals and values,” said Moises Cortés, a graduate/international credentials analyst for the Office of Graduate Admission at USC .

Address any gaps or discrepancies . Explain any factors that may have impacted your academic career. If you had an illness or any other personal hardships that affected your grades or work, discuss them. If there is a discrepancy between your grades and your test scores, you can also take the time to go over any extenuating circumstances.

Strike the right tone . While it’s important to give readers a glimpse of your personality, avoid oversharing or revealing intimate details of your life experiences. You should also avoid making jokes or using humorous cliches. Maintain a professional tone throughout your writing.

Start strong and finish strong . As with any piece of writing, you want to draw in your readers immediately. Make sure to start off with an interesting and captivating introduction. Similarly, your conclusion should be a well-written, engaging finish to the essay that highlights any important points.

“ For a personal statement, I think the first and last paragraphs are most important and should always relate the program they are applying to their own experiences and ideas,” Hoon H. Kang, a graduate/international credential analyst with the Office of Graduate Admission, told USC Online.

Proofread, proofread and proofread again . We can’t emphasize enough the importance of rereading your work. Your personal statement is also an analysis of your writing skills, so ensure you have proper grammar and spelling throughout. In addition, we recommend having multiple people look over your statement before submission. They can help with the proofreading (a second person always catches a mistake the writer may miss), give advice about the statement’s structure and content, and confirm it’s the proper recommended length.

Once you’ve considered all of the above and reviewed and edited your personal statement to perfection, it’s time to submit and check off any remaining application requirements, including your resume and letters of recommendation .

Personal statements are arguably one of the most challenging aspects of applying to graduate school, so make sure to revel in this accomplishment and acknowledge your successes.

For more information, visit the  Office of Graduate Admission at USC  and explore  USC Online ’s master’s degrees, doctoral programs and graduate certificates.

• College Application

UC Personal Statement Examples

Use our UC personal statement samples to learn how to write a college essay for these prestigious institutions. The UC application system has eight prompts that they refer to as “personal insight questions.” Not unlike other college essays , the UC prompts cover very common college essay topics familiar to all applicants, including background, family, strengths, weaknesses, hobbies, and so on. You can go through UC personal statement samples if you are finding it hard to write supplemental college essays of your own. Practicing the writing of supplemental essays will give you the confidence to easily overcome that obstacle when the time comes to submit your application to the university. Read on to learn how to write the best UC essay for your application.

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Article Contents 9 min read

Uc personal statement requirements.

Before we go ahead and have a look at each prompt and the UC personal statement samples, let us go over the UC personal statement requirements.

According to the UC application requirements, prospective candidates must choose to respond to four out of the eight available questions. Each essay has a word limit of 350 words.

UC also offers a piece of advice by suggesting that while the questions you choose are up to you, you should choose the prompts that are “most relevant to your experience and that best reflect your individual circumstances.” Keep in mind that the prompts are quite open-ended, so you have a lot of creative freedom when it comes to writing your essays. Try to choose prompts where you can showcase the qualities valued by the UC schools, such as leadership, creativity, diversity, academic prowess, and so on.

Learn how to write your college essays:

Now, let’s review expertly written UC personal statement samples. Below are essays that were written in response to four out of the eight prompts, as is required by UC. The fifth one is a bonus.

Prompt 1: Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time.

In my junior year of high school, I set a goal for myself: I would start a jazz club. Although we had several music clubs, including acapella, classical, and rock – there were none for the music I loved: jazz. To me, jazz is a genre that transcends race and nationalities. It is the music of “understanding.” By my junior year, I’d been playing the saxophone for five years, mostly at home, and wanted to continue to play with others. I also wanted to expose my peers to the music that meant so much to me. 

However, I also understood that jazz is the kind of music that attracted a distinct following. One must be exposed to live jazz before one can appreciate the beauty of this genre. I, therefore, knew I had to start by creating a buzz before considering forming a club, or it would be a club of one. And to create this buzz, I had to expose my schoolmates to live jazz and, therefore, create a jazz band.

I started looking for band members among my classmates. Not only did I ask my school to advertise my search in the school newspaper, but I also put up flyers at the entrance of the school to attract musicians. 

Slowly, over three months, I found four musicians to form our jazz quintet. Once we had set up our rehearsal schedules and practiced a few songs, we were confident enough to perform our first gig at the upcoming “Culture Day” hosted by our school.

After enthusiastic ovations for our last song, we took the opportunity to announce our intention to form a school jazz club and welcome everyone to join us in appreciation of this eclectic genre.

Shortly after our performance, we had our club. Over the last year, the club has grown exponentially. I continued to practice with my band and other club members, and we even began to invite local jazz musicians to play with us. Today, the club is growing strong and I hope will remain a part of the X high school for years to come.  (350 words)

As you can see from the UC personal statement samples and prompts, the UC schools are trying to understand what kinds of experiences you will bring to the college community. Remember, research each UC school to strategically choose experiences and skills to highlight in your essay.

Want to learn more about UC schools?

The UC personal statements are submitted using the UC application system, so you will simply be banned from submitting your work.

Your essays should be stories. Tell the admissions committee who you are and what got you to where you are today.

Don’t forget to spell check and make sure there are no grammatical errors.

UC schools are some of the best universities in the world. This means, the competition for admission each year is cutthroat.

Focus on ways you can increase your chances by creating exceptional personal statements and essays.

You can only join a UC school if you have a minimum 3.0 GPA as a California resident and a 3.4 GPA if you are a non-resident.

Not everyone is good at writing personal statements. But, you can go ahead and work with college essay advisors to get some pointers on how to write a competent personal statement.

It really doesn’t matter if the UC prompts change every year or not. The point is that you learn to write the best essays that you can and succeed in getting admitted to the university – regardless of the prompt.

The first thing you need to remember is that the personal statement is like a story about you. If you look at the prompts for the UC personal statements, you can see that they ask about you and how you affect – or are affected by – your community, your background, your experiences, and so on.

To make your personal statement stand out, you need to tell a compelling story when answering the prompts.

Since you’re talking about your life and experiences, you can go with a semi-casual tone. Avoid vulgar terms, stay away from controversial topics, and never write about current hot topics in politics.

Remember: you want to leave a good impression with the admissions committee – so don’t shoot yourself in the foot by inadvertently offending them.

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The Statement of Purpose is an important part of the online application and is given careful consideration in the selection process. Be concise and specific in preparing your statement: give information that will aid the selection committee in evaluating your potential for completing a graduate program of study at UC San Diego. Check the  department directory listing  for specific content requirements.

Focus your Statement of Purpose on the reasons you are interested in attending a specific graduate program at UCSD. Check the department requirements for the Statement of Purpose. The statement should be well organized, concise, and completely free of grammar, punctuation, and spelling errors. Before submitting the statement, seek constructive comments and criticism from friends and advisors.

Five primary topics to cover in your statement of purpose:

• How did you become interested in this field? Establish that you have had a long-term interest in the field and that you have taken positive steps in pursuing your interest. Give the committee members a sense of your particular talents and abilities and their relevance to your academic interests.
• What experiences have contributed toward your preparation for further study in this field? Demonstrate your interest by providing examples of research experiences, internships, work experience, community service, publications, or life experiences. Briefly describe what you did in each experience. Also, make sure to articulate what you have learned about the field and how those lessons stimulated you to pursue an advanced degree.
• What are your future goals? Specifically state your degree objective (Master's or Ph.D.) and specify what subdisciplines you are interested in pursuing. For example, if you are applying in political science, the committee needs to know whether you are pursuing American Politics, Comparative Politics, International Relations, or Political Theory. Let the reader know that you are planning a future career as a university professor, researcher, or consultant, or in public service or private practice (or whatever your goal happens to be).
• What are your research interests? Within your subdiscipline, you should be able to identify one or two topics that are of interest to you. When possible, be specific about your research agenda. Remember that you will be working with professors in research; therefore, your research interests should parallel those of the faculty. (You will usually not be expected to know exactly what you want to research; faculty know that initial interests often change.)
• How are you a "match" for the program to which you are applying? Explain what attracts you most to the institution/program to which you are applying. Align your research interests with those of one or more of the affiliated professors. The better the "match" with the program/professors, the better the chance that you will be admitted.

Other factors to weave in (remember these are secondary factors):

• Give examples of personal attributes or qualities that would help you complete graduate study successfully.
• Describe your determination to achieve your goals, your initiative and ability to develop ideas, and your ability to work independently.
• Describe background characteristics that may have placed you at an educational disadvantage (English language learner, family economic history, lack of educational opportunity, disability, etc.).
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Write Your Draft

Tell Your Story So Far  

Graduate schools ask you to submit admissions essays in an effort to get to know you better and understand your motivations for pursuing their program. Nearly every graduate program you encounter requires at least one essay, as it is an effective tool for them to gain key insights.

Fortunately, writing essays is something that should feel familiar to you by this point in your education, however, there can be more than what meets the eye in the various formats and prompts that are provided for application essays.

Use this page to compose a powerful draft for a Statement of Purpose, Personal Statement, Research Statement, and other statements for graduate admission.

Three-Pronged Outline

To begin drafting your document, it can help to begin with an outline that covers the three fundamental topics of most admissions essays:

• Motivations: Why do you want to go to graduate school in your chosen field or discipline? Why do you want to attend the particular program to which you are applying?
• Qualifications: Why are you qualified to attend the graduate program? How do your academic performance, experiences, and extracurricular achievements demonstrate your suitability for that graduate program?
• Direction: Where do you see yourself heading professionally, and how will the graduate program help you accomplish this goal?

An Introduction That Captivates

Consider creating a storyline with an opening that is personal to you. Here are some strategies for creating a memorable opening to your essay:

• Place the reader into your story at a key moment in time
• Draw inspiration from a significant character in your story by beginning with something they once told you
• Provide a narrative, account, or observation about a current event that pertains to your story

Avoid an opening that states that you have wanted to pursue the field since a young age, as this is the most common way that applicants begin their admissions essays. You can certainly open this way, but know that it is frequently used, and your readers appreciate variety just like anyone else.

Writing Tips  

There are a few key considerations when writing, refining, and editing the body of your essay. Here are some essential tips.

Consider Your Audience

What will your audience want to learn about in order to better understand why you would be a great match for their program? If you are using significant space to tell a story that is not bolstering this point, you may want to edit it out. Keep your writing focused and concise.

Keep a Positive Tone

One of the biggest red flags that graduate programs see is an applicant who puts others down (i.e., another institution, organization, or individual) in an attempt to build themselves up. Your essay should not be judgmental in any way. This is unbecoming on a personal level and unprofessional.

Avoid Complimenting a Program’s Prestige

This is not an appropriate medium for you to make broad compliments about a program or explain why the program to which you are applying is better than your undergraduate college or university. Instead, focus on concrete aspects of the program that would add value to your career.

Condense Your Prose

Take any paragraph in your essay and calculate its word count. Now try to get the same message across in half as many words. You may not be able to do it, but the effort will show you where you can and cannot trim.

Proofread for Typos

Mistakes with grammar and spelling look unprofesional and undermine your credibbilty as a schollar. Don’t you aggree? :)

Get a Fresh Perspective

Enlist a friend you trust to read your essay. When they are done, go back to each paragraph and ask them to paraphrase what you wrote. Is what they remember the thing you wanted to get across? If not, rewrite so that it is.

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Graduate school personal statement appointment with a writing specialist or tutor, key policies for graduate school personal statement appointments.

• Although Specialist (STAFF) appointments could go up to 50 minutes, Tutor (PEER) appointments could go as long as 60 minutes.
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• Students can book appointments up to 72 hours in advance (not including holidays and weekends)
• If you recently graduated, you can book up to 3 appointments on the personal statement calendar for one extra quarter (based on availability). For example, if you graduated spring 2023, you may see a specialist up until the end of summer 2023. If you graduated one quarter ago and have trouble with accessing the calendar, please email Kevin Sitz .

If you want help on your graduate school personal statement, you can ONLY book your appointment on the Graduate School Personal Statement calendar. You may also use this calendar to book for transfer essays along with program application essays (e.g., the UC transfer application). If you book on the general writing appointment calendar, your appointment may be cancelled. Note: personal statements for UCD classes (e.g., UWP 104) should be booked on the Appointment with a Writing Specialist or Tutor calendar  or the Submit Writing for Feedback calendar .

Due to AATC and University policy, you should not misrepresent yourself on the calendar (e.g., signing up for a graduate school statement on the Online Writing Appointment calendar and saying it is for a scholarship or booking an appointment for a friend using your account). Using your account in this way could result in consequences that limit your access to our system.

If none of our writing support options work for you or you have technology issues, please email Kevin Sitz at [email protected]

Access Graduate School Personal Statement Appointments Calendar Click on each topic below to learn more about how to book an appointment. Please familiarize yourself with our policies before your first appointment.

How Do I Sign Up For Oasis Appointments?

STEP ONE. Go to tutoring.ucdavis.edu and click on “Writing.”

STEP TWO. Once you are on the Writing Page, click on “Appointment with a Writing Specialist or Tutor”

STEP THREE. This will lead you to this page with directions on what to expect during your scheduled appointment, what to prepare, etc.

STEP FOUR. At the bottom of these instructions is a link to book your appointment. You must sign in with your UC Davis username and password (sometimes called CAS or Kerberos).

STEP FIVE. In the appointment booking website, select “Academic Assistance and Tutoring Centers” from either drop-down menu and “Online Graduate School Personal Statements" for help with personal statements or "Online Writing Appointments" for help with other kinds of writing (e.g., coursework, scholarships, OSSJA referral).

STEP SIX. On the next page, fill out your appointment details with your name, email, phone number, and what you need help with (e.g., UWP 22, Personal Statement, Scholarship). 

In the Special Situation box, click the appointment type that applies (for Online Writing Appointments: Appeals Letter or OSSJA Referral, Job or Internship Cover Letter, Scholarship Essay, or UC Davis class paper or assignment. For Online Graduate School Personal Statements: Health Sciences, Law School, MA or PhD program, or Med School). Then in the Reasons box, indicate the specific type of writing you are working on (e.g., UWP 1, Gilman scholarship, medical school secondaries). When you’re ready, click “Next.” 

STEP SEVEN. Once you can see the calendar, you can book your appointment. 

Across the top of the calendar, you can filter by appointment type. The AATC offers remote and in-person appointments.

In the top center, you can click on the drop-down menu to select the name of the Tutor (marked with PEER on their name) or Specialist (marked with STAFF on their name) whose calendar you want to view. You can also select “Any Available Advisor” to see everyone’s calendars at once.

Click on an appointment time that works for you. If your Tutor or Specialist has multiple options available for type of appointment, choose a type that works for you. Click “Confirm.”

What Can I Expect After I Sign up?

What to Prepare before your Tutoring Session

For Online Appointments:

• Please see below if you do not know how to use Google Documents.
• Any files (e.g., prompts, rubrics, etc.) that you can share with your Tutor or Specialist via Google Docs or Screen Share on Zoom.
• A list of questions to potentially ask your Tutor or Specialist. Remember that you only have up to 50-60 minutes with a Tutor or Specialist.
• Please familiarize yourself with Zoom in the tutorial below.

For In-Person Appointments:

• Any documents (e.g., prompts, rubric, etc) that you can share with your Tutor or Specialist during the appointment.

How to Meet With A Specialist or Tutor

After you schedule your appointment, you will receive an automatic email that has the link to your Tutor’s or Specialist’s Zoom link. You may click on the link before your Tutor or Specialist does, but your Tutor or Specialist will not arrive to the Zoom meeting until your scheduled appointment time.

Please make sure you are checking your email to have access to the Zoom link. You may have to download Zoom in order to use it on your laptop.

Start your tutoring session!

You will be asked to share a Google Doc of your essay/reading/other materials (be sure you set the documents so your Tutor or Specialist can edit) or Screen Share your documents over Zoom.

Your tutoring session is scheduled up to 50-60 minutes with a Tutor or Specialist. If you do not get all your questions answered, you can schedule another appointment.

After you schedule your appointment, you will receive an automatic email that has the location of the Tutor or Specialist you are meeting with.

Please make sure you are checking your email to have access to the appointment location ahead of time 

It’s important to show up promptly to your appointment but there is no need to show up early. 

You will be asked to share your essay and any supporting materials (e.g., prompt, rubric, reading) with the Tutor or Specialist to review together.

How Do I Use Zoom?

Source: How Do I Join a Zoom Meeting?

Join a Zoom meeting from your computer:

If the host shared the meeting link with you:

• Click the link that was shared with you from the host.
• If you are prompted by your browser to open the Zoom app, click OK .
• The Zoom meeting should open. Turn on/off your microphone and camera as desired.

If the host shared the Meeting ID with you:

• Navigate to https://www.zoom.us/join .
• Enter the Meeting ID then click Join .
• If you are prompted by your browser to open the Zoom app, click OK.

Join a Zoom meeting from your phone:

Call one of the Zoom International Dial-in Numbers:

• US: (669) 900-6833
• US: (646) 876-9923
• Additional Countries/Regions: https://ucdavis.zoom.us/zoomconference

Enter the provided Meeting ID followed by #

• If you do not know the Meeting ID , contact the host of the Zoom meeting.

You do not need to enter a Host Key, just press #

If prompted, enter the meeting password.

How do I Use Google Documents?

You all should have access to Google Docs as a UC Davis student. If you have been using another word processor, you can follow the following steps to use Google Docs with your UCD email address: 

STEP 1: Go to drive.google.com and log in.

STEP 2: Go to “New” and “Google Docs.”

STEP 3: Paste your essay into the document.

STEP 4: Share your essay. Click on Share

STEP 5: Click on “Get Sharable link”

STEP 6: Under “Get Link” click “Change,” select UC Davis in the left drop-down, and select “Editor” in the right drop-down. 

STEP 7: Make sure that your Tutor or Specialist has edit permissions on your essay . Copy the link. Make sure you have this link handy to send to your Tutor or Specialist via Zoom chat.

Frequently Asked Questions

What Can a  Specialist or Tutor Help Me With?

A Tutor or Specialist CAN help 

• Walk you through concepts
• Walk you through examples to help you better understand grammar
• Give you suggestions on how to better answer the prompt
• Guide you through a reading assignment

A Tutor or Specialist CANNOT 

• Edit your essay directly 
• Suggest what grade the paper may earn
• Write your essay for you 

Essentially, a Tutor or Specialist is there to GUIDE you through the learning process; they are not an editing service or homework machine. They want to make sure you leave the tutoring session with a better understanding of the concepts.

What happens if my Tutor or Specialist is not at the Zoom link/location indicated in the email for a remote or in-person appointment?

Please wait a few minutes. It is possible your Tutor or Specialist is traveling from another location/wrapping up another meeting before your appointment. If they do not arrive within 10 minutes of the scheduled appointment time, you can contact the Front Desk by calling (530) 752-2013 or visiting 2205 Dutton Hall for assistance.

What happens if I do not receive a Zoom link by the time my appointment arrives?

Check your Bulk or Junk mail folders for a message from the Advising Appointment System.

Please wait 10 minutes after booking your appointment and then contact the Front Desk by calling (530) 752-2013 so they can help troubleshoot. The Specialist or Tutor will also email you directly if they do not see you in their Zoom room 10-15 minutes after the start of the appointment.

Can my Tutor or Specialist help me with my online exam?

It is against OSSJA rules and AATC policy to help you with a writing assignment where the professor does not allow outside collaboration. In this situation, the best your Tutor or Specialist can do is to guide you through similar writing/grammar concepts so you can understand the concept. In fact, if the draft has the word “exam” on it, we encourage you to check and see if your professor will allow you to go to tutoring to get help on that specific assignment before your scheduled writing appointment.

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How to write a personal statement

If you want to give current article to your teenage child you might be right. But adults can be interested in it too. Personal statement is a piece of individual writing a person usually encloses to his or her university application. It's never too late to study, universities accept not only young and enthusiastic people but representatives of all ages. Anyway, we think it's vital to know how to write a personal statement. Who knows maybe next year you'll express desire to go back to school! Internet as usual can offer you a huge amount of personal statement examples for any case. We prefer to stick to theory that it should be unique and reflect best traits of your character and has a full story of your achievements. Personal statement format is not strict but of course there is a plan to follow. First is introduction. It should be catchy and captivate reader's attention from first sentence. In several blocks tell briefly but vividly about your education, experience and skills. Don't ask anyone for help, use your own words and phrases, let the committee know what a person you are. Search for tips on how to write a personal statement but do writing part yourself, without appropriating anyone's thoughts. In personal financial statement explain need of scholarship or financial aid. In personal mission statement define your primary goals you plan to achieve in life with help of high school.

Personal statement examples for different aims

Not to get lost under flood of information about personal statements, everyone should know that for each type of high school there should be a unique piece of paper.

Personal statement for graduate school won't contain any information about your desperate need of financial assistance in studying. This is what a personal financial statement for.

Planning to become a famous doctor and getting a medical certificate? Write a medical school personal statement, describe your preference. There is surely a noble reason for choosing career of doctor. After finishing studies and applying for a place in hospital as an intern there is a necessity to write residency personal statement. And again you say what made you think this very hospital would provide the best experience for you.

Dreaming of a career in jurisprudence? Be sure to make best law school personal statement ever. The competition between applicants is quite hard, as there are plenty of them. With moderate or low grades knowledge of how to write a personal statement is not just important, it's vital. When looking through samples ignore those that don't belong to necessary sphere. Medical school personal statement examples are not proper when applying for law school.

Importance of a good statement

Use of correct personal statement format is significant. Grades matter too but a brilliant piece of writing may win you a place in high school. Devote as much time as possible to compose it. Even when making a personal statement for college do your best. Examine your work several times, make notes, change part you don't like, give it to you teacher or senior to evaluate. Personal mission statement examples will help to make a right decision and sometimes completely change your mind.

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Statement Writing

If you missed the GATES meeting on "Writing a Personal Statement", we've compiled the advice from our wonderful graduate student panel below. You can also see real example statements from successful applications to graduate school and for GRFP fellowships at the bottom of this page.

The personal statement is your opportunity to talk about who you are, what you are interested in, and where you are coming from. Here, you can emphasize particularly relevant or important aspects of your CV. This is also the place to explain your journey if you started off in another field, took time off, or aren’t particularly proud of your GPA. If you have negative experiences to describe, include how you learned from them and how they have shaped you. This is very different from writing than a lab report, make sure it reflects your personality!

The personal statement is also a way to describe how you will fit into a potential graduate program and should be tailored for each school. You can suggest collaborations with other lab groups on campus, describe how your work will use an instrument or technique that’s available, and think about how the courses offered will help you attain your research goals. This will require a little digging through the department website but will show that you are truly interested in that particular program. 

Make sure you include how graduate school fits into your long-term plans. Mention why you are applying to a masters versus a PhD program. Describe what you hope to do afterwards. This isn’t a hard and fast commitment, but it shows you’ve thought about why you want to go to graduate school in the first place. 

Pay attention to the prompts! Different programs may want different types of statements. Make sure you are providing what they ask for. If a prompt is super vague, (politely) reach out to your potential advisor in that program and ask what they are looking for. 

The approach

There are many different ways to start writing a personal statement so you’ll need to find what works for you! A few of our panelist described writing it in a chronological fashion in order to end up at their current interests. Others panelists suggested a non-linear path, but everyone agreed the first draft is “word vomit”, so just get writing! If you can’t imagine writing about yourself, ask your friends to describe you and your awesome research. 

Get feedback and ask for examples! Ask your friends if it sounds like you. Ask your professors if it’s clear and concise. Graduate students and postdocs are a great resource as well. They have just been through this process and can offer lots of useful advice. Ask for their personal statements to use as an example!

Example Statements

Outside resources.

These resources have compiled past application statements for grad school, fellowships, grants, funding, etc.

Open Grants

NSF GRFP Examples

Example Personal Statements (For CU Boulder)

Here's an example of a personal statement written for CU Boulder.  Use these as a guide for yours, but remember to write about yourself and your interest!

CUB Example Personal Statement 1

CUB Example Personal Statement 2

CUB Example Personal Statement 3

CUB Example Personal Statement 4

CUB Example Personal Statement 5

CUB Example Personal Statement 6

CUB Example Personal Statement 7

Example Statements for Other Schools

Berkeley Example Personal Statement 1

Davis Example Diversity Fellowship 1

Davis Example Diversity Statement 1

Davis Example Statement of Purpose 1

UM Example Personal Statement 1

UM Example Personal Statement 2

UNR Example Statement of Purpose 1

Example GRFP Statements

GRFP Example Personal Statement 1

GRFP Example Research Statement 1

GRFP Example Personal Statement 2

GRFP Example Research Statement 2

NFL distances itself from Chiefs’ Harrison Butker’s Benedictine College speech

In response to the controversy surrounding Harrison Butker’s commencement speech at Benedictine College, the NFL distanced itself from the ideas expressed in the speech, saying the league doesn’t share the beliefs the Kansas City Chiefs kicker voiced while addressing the graduating students.

During the commencement speech, Butker referred to Pride Month as an example of the “deadly sins.” He also addressed gender ideologies and said a woman’s most important title is “homemaker.”

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“Not the deadly sins sort of Pride that has an entire month dedicated to it,” Butker said, “but the true God-centered pride that is cooperating with the holy ghost to glorify him.”

Butker spoke for more than 20 minutes to students at the Catholic school in Atchison, Kan., saying he wanted the graduating class to prevent political leaders from interfering with social issues that impact their relationship with the church.

In response, NFL senior vice president and chief diversity and inclusion officer Jonathan Beane said in a statement to The Athletic that Butker gave the speech “in his personal capacity.”

“His views are not those of the NFL as an organization. The NFL is steadfast in our commitment to inclusion, which only makes our league stronger,” Beane said. His statement was first reported by People.

The Chiefs declined to comment when reached Thursday by The Athletic .

While Pride Month, which is in June, falls outside the NFL’s season, the league participates in LGBTQ+ initiatives. On the Wednesday before Super Bowl LVIII, the NFL hosted a “Night of Pride” event in partnership with GLAAD, the LGBTQ+ advocacy organization.

The Chiefs are among the NFL teams that have a Pride selection of apparel with rainbow colors. Kansas City is also among the many North American cities that host Pride events during June, led by the KC Pride Community Alliance.

Later Thursday, legendary college football coach and TV analyst Lou Holtz took to X to thank Butker “for standing strong in your faith values.”

“Your commencement speech at Benedictine College showed courage and conviction and I admire that,” Holtz wrote, later linking to a form from America First Works for people to sign and offer their thanks to Butker for his comments.

Required reading

• Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker says Pride Month is example of ‘deadly sin’ during commencement speech

(Photo: Ric Tapia / Getty Images)

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Tess DeMeyer is a Staff Editor for The Athletic working on the live/breaking news team. Prior to joining The Athletic, she worked as an associate digital producer at Sports Illustrated. Tess attended Brown University and originates from a small town outside of Savannah, GA. Follow Tess on Twitter @ tess_demeyer