How To Write a Personal Statement That Stands Out

How To Write a Personal Statement That Stands Out

Table of contents

personal statement example help

Laura Jane Bradbury

A personal statement is a chance to highlight your unique qualities, skills, and experiences, all while showcasing your personality.

But whether you're applying for university, a job, or funding, it can be daunting to write about yourself. To increase your chances of getting accepted, it's important to know how to create an effective personal statement.

In my six years as a copywriter, I’ve written many personal statements that get results. In this article, I’ll guide you through what to include, what to avoid, and how to tailor a personal statement based on your application type.

Key Takeaways

  • A personal statement is an opportunity to share your unique qualities, experiences, and skills.
  • It should always relate to the course, job, or funding you are applying for.
  • Include accomplishments and experiences that demonstrate how suited you are to the position or course you are applying for.
  • Use clear and simple language to ensure your points are understood.

Your personal statement should be concise and demonstrate how you fit the position or opportunity you’re applying for. It’s important to keep information relevant, rather than listing all of your skills and accomplishments.

Follow these steps to accurately write and tailor your statement.

Understand your prompt

Before you start, make sure you understand what's expected of you. Are there specific instructions, keywords, or phrases that stand out in your prompt? Read through it thoroughly and note the requirements. You can then brainstorm ideas for each point.

Let's say I'm applying for a university journalism course. I've been asked to write a statement that shares why I'm interested and why I would be a good fit. I can use columns to plan my content:

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Putting your ideas together first makes it easier to stay on track. Otherwise, you might lose focus and include irrelevant information. 

Show, don't just tell

Once you’ve listed your experiences, skills, and accomplishments, consider how you can demonstrate them with examples. Take a look at the list you created during the previous exercise and organize your points so you have clear examples and proof.

personal statement example help

This technique helps you demonstrate your experiences and how they tie in with your application.

When telling anecdotes, use engaging stories that demonstrate your skills. For instance, a story about how I handled a fast-paced news internship proves I work well under pressure. 

Start strong

Recruiters, application tutors, and funders read lots of personal statements. You can make yours stand out with an engaging introduction.

Examples of a strong opening include:

A meaningful statistic

This draws readers in and increases credibility: 

"Communication is the key to marketing success, according to Business Marketing News. With five years of experience communicating and delivering campaigns to global clients, I have the skills and passion to add value to your team."

A personal story

Anecdotes connect the reader with the author’s real-life experience: 

"My first exposure to microbiology was during my time as a research assistant for a microbiologist. I was fascinated by the complex and intricate processes within cells."

An alarming statement

This piques the reader’s interest by making an issue seem urgent:  

“ The fashion industry churns out clothes at an alarming rate, causing mass production of synthetic fibers and harsh chemicals which have a detrimental impact on the planet. Funding my sustainability initiative is vital to mitigating this environmental impact." 

Avoid cliches such as "From a young age, I have always loved...." and "For as long as I can remember, I have had a passion for..."

Pro tip: Use Wordtune Editor 's Shorten feature to cut unnecessary fluff and make your intro sharper. Simply type in your sentence and click Shorten to receive suggestions.

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Get Wordtune for free > Get Wordtune for free >

Admission committees and employers appreciate sincerity and authenticity. While it may be tempting, avoid exaggeration. You can better emphasize your skills and personality by being honest. For instance, rather than claiming I read every type of newspaper in my journalism application, I can focus on my dedication to reading The New York Times.

Your writing style should also feel genuine. Instead of trying to impress with complex language and fancy words, keep sentences simple and direct . This makes them more effective because they’re easier to read. 

Address weaknesses

Addressing weaknesses can show your willingness to confront challenges. It also gives you a chance to share efforts you have made for improvement. When explaining a weakness, exclude excuses.

Instead of saying "I didn't achieve my expected grades due to work commitments impacting my studies," try “While I didn't achieve my expected grades, I am now working with a tutor to help me understand my weak areas so I can succeed in your program.”

Wordtune’s Spices feature can help you develop counterarguments to weaknesses. In the Editor, highlight your text, click on Spices, and then Counterargument . Here’s an example:

Wordtune Editor’s Spices feature can provide a counterargument to help you address weaknesses in a personal statement.

Using Wordtune’s suggestion, I can highlight my eagerness to learn and provide examples to support my argument.

Highlight achievements

This is your chance to shine! A personal statement should highlight your best qualities — provided they relate to your prompt.

Ask yourself:

  • What are your skills and strengths? Identify both academic and non-academic abilities such as critical thinking, problem-solving, and teamwork.
  • What challenges have you faced? Reflect on how you have overcome significant challenges and how these experiences have helped you grow. For example, completing a course, learning a new language, or starting a business.
  • What are your unique selling points? Consider what sets you apart from other applicants. For example, you may have a unique set of technical skills or experience learning in a different country.
  • How have your achievements shaped your goals and aspirations? Sharing your goals shows that you think long-term and have taken the time to make sure you’re applying for the right opportunity.

Connect with the institution or company

Tailor your statement to the specific institution or company you're applying to — this shows you understand their values and have carefully considered where you want to seek opportunities.

To do this, head to the company or institution’s website and look for the About page. Many organizations include a mission statement on this page that conveys its purpose and values.

Princeton University’s “In service of humanity” page highlights that they value supporting society and giving back.

For example, universities often include their values under “Community” or “Student Life” sections. Here, Princeton University’s “In Service of Humanity” section highlights how they value using education to benefit society. Applicants can engage with this by explaining how they interact with their communities and seek to use their education to help others.

You can also research a company or institution’s social media. Look for similarities — maybe you both prioritize collaboration or think outside the box. Draw upon this in your personal statement. 

End with a strong conclusion

A strong conclusion is clear, concise, and leaves a lasting impression. Use these three steps:

  • Summarize the main points of your statement. For example, “My experience volunteering for the school newspaper, along with my communication skills and enthusiasm for writing, make me an ideal student for your university."
  • Discuss your future . Share your future ambitions to remind the reader that you’ve carefully considered how the opportunity fits into your plans.
  • Include a closing statement. End on a positive note and offer the reader a final explanation for why you would be a great match. For instance, “Thank you for reviewing my statement. I am confident my skills and experience align with the role and your company culture.”

Tip: Learn more about writing an effective conclusion with our handy guide . 

Different types of personal statements

Now you know how to write a personal statement, let’s look at what to focus on depending on your application type.

personal statement example help

The length of your personal statement will vary depending on the type. Generally, it should be around 500 words to 650 words . However, a university application is often longer than a statement for a job, so it’s vital to determine what is expected of you from the beginning.

Whatever the length, it’s important to remove and edit content fluff , including any repetition or copy that does not relate to your prompt.

Personal statement checklist

Use this checklist to ensure that your statement includes: 

  • An engaging introduction.
  • Clear examples of your experiences, skills, and expertise. 
  • A commitment to improvement, if required.
  • Any applicable achievements. 
  • A direct connection to the company or institution’s values.
  • A strong conclusion that summarizes information without adding new content.
  • Authentic, simple language.

Personal statements are an opportunity to delve deeper and share who you are beyond your grades or resume experience. Demonstrate your ability with anecdotes and examples, address any weaknesses, and remember to use genuine and simple language. This is your place to shine, so follow our tips while displaying your unique personality, and you’ll be sure to stand out from the crowd.

Want to get started and create a powerful introduction? Read our step-by-step guide .

What is the difference between a cover letter and a personal statement?

A cover letter expresses your interest in a position and introduces you to an employer. It’s typically shorter and focuses on your qualifications, skills, and experience for a particular role. A personal statement, however, is common for a job, internship, funding, or university application. It explores your background, goals, and aspirations, as well as your skills and experience.

What is the purpose of a personal statement?

A personal statement is an opportunity to stand out by detailing your background, experiences, and aspirations. It should explain why you are interested in and a good match for the company or institution you are applying to.

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How to Write a Personal Statement – 5 Personal Statement Examples

How to write a personal statement – introduction.

The personal statement is one of the most important parts of the college application process. For this reason, it’s often also one of the most anxiety-inducing. If you’ve been searching for personal statement examples because writing your personal statement has you worried (or excited), then you’re in the right place. 

In this article, we’ll present five personal statement examples and teach you how to write a personal statement that highlights who you are and demonstrates your full potential to colleges. We’re going to outline what a personal statement is, how colleges use them in the application process, and which topics tend to work best for college applicants. Then, we’ll offer some advice and tools to help you draft, edit, and finalize your own personal statement. Finally, we’ll walk you through five personal essay examples, breaking them down individually, so you can see just what makes them work. 

Writing a personal statement may seem like a daunting task, especially if you aren’t clear on just exactly what a personal statement for college is. After you see your first personal statement example, things may seem clearer. But first, let’s demystify the term “personal statement.” 

What is a personal statement?

Learning how to write a personal statement starts with understanding the term . I’m sure throughout the college application process you’ve heard your counselors, teachers, and classmates talking about the importance of a personal statement. While you may know that the personal statement for a university is extremely important, you still might not be clear on just what it is. You may have never even seen a personal statement example. So, before you attempt to start writing , let’s answer the questions: what is a personal statement for college? And just how do universities use them to evaluate students?

A personal statement for college is your chance to set yourself apart from other students and show admissions who you are. A strong personal statement for a university will describe your unique experiences and background in a first-person narrative. And when done well, it’s your opportunity to catch the right attention of an admission officer. 

No pressure, right? Don’t stress quite yet. The process of writing a personal statement can be fun! It’s an opportunity to write about something you’re passionate about. You’ll be able to see a personal statement example later on (five, actually!), and you’ll notice that it’s not about the perfect topic , but rather, how you tell your story. 

Personal statement basics

Now, let’s talk about personal essay specifics. Generally speaking, a personal statement will be between 400-700 words, depending on the specific university guidelines or application portal. The Common App essay must be 250-650 words. The Coalition App , by contrast, suggests that students write 500-650 words.  Try to aim for the higher end of those ranges, as you’ll be hard pressed to write a compelling personal statement without enticing descriptions. 

Apart from the word count, what’s the personal statement format? The personal statement for a university should be written in a first-person conventional prose format. You may be a wonderful poet or fiction writer but refrain from using those styles in your personal statement. While using those styles in a personal essay could occasionally be a hit with admissions, it’s best to showcase that style of writing elsewhere. If you choose to add your creative writing style to your application, you should do so by submitting a writing portfolio. Generally speaking, the strongest personal statement will be written in first-person prose language. 

General or prompted

When it comes to a personal statement for college, it will generally fall into one of two categories : general, comprehensive personal statement, or a response to a very specific personal essay prompt. In the open-ended option, you’ll want to share a story about something important related to your life. This could be about family, experiences, academics, or extracurriculars . Just be careful not to repeat your entire resume. That’s certainly not the goal of a personal essay.  

Remember, it’s a personal statement. So, share something that you haven’t elsewhere. If given a prompt, it will likely be open-ended so that you can flex your creativity and show off your writing style. You’ll be able to write a story that genuinely matters to you, ideally sharing something that has made you who you are. 

You may also need a personal statement when applying to certain programs, such as business or STEM programs. The basic idea is the same, but you’ll want to connect your experiences to the specific program. Check out the details of writing a personal statement for a specific field . 

That extra push

The college application process can seem rigid at times; the personal statement for college is your chance to show off in a way that has nothing to do with GPA or transcripts. The personal statement is an opportunity for colleges to meet students on their own terms. It’s essentially your written interview . 

At top universities, many students will have similar grades and test scores. A strong personal statement gives students the chance to stand out and show that they’re more than just numbers on a transcript. What’s the extra push that an admissions officer may need to admit a qualified student? A well-written, compelling personal statement can help you gain admittance to competitive schools . 

Having a support system throughout the college admissions process is important. Keep your parents in the loop with this personal statement webinar that offers details about the common app essay and the personal essay for college. 

You are probably wondering the same things as other students about the college application essay or college essay tips. Read an admissions officer’s response to some FAQs and get some useful college essay tips. Then, put your college admissions knowledge to the test with our quiz below!

The CommonApp Essay vs. The Personal Statement

So, we’ve discussed what a personal statement is and why it matters. Now, let’s discuss one common type of personal statement: the Common App essay. While each school may have their own personal statement topics, the Common App essay section has general prompts that will serve as your personal statement. The Common App essay will respond to one of seven prompts.

For the most up-to-date information on the Common App essay, you can check their website .

Common App Essay Questions for 2022-2023:   

  • Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.
  • The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?
  • Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome?
  • Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you?
  • Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.
  • Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?
  • Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you’ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Open-ended prompts

The Common App essay personal statement prompts are intentionally open-ended. They are meant to give you the chance to tell your unique story . However, one requirement is that your Common App essay must be between 250-650 words. 

You can choose to respond to any one of the seven prompts. Remember to choose the best prompt for you. It may seem obvious, but the personal statement for college is your opportunity to share your personal story. You’ll want to choose a topic you can write well about that will show how you’ve grown or changed. It’s also your opportunity to show off your writing style. So, pick a topic you enjoy writing about!

Check out some tips on how to tackle each prompt from the Common App essay blog. You may also want to read this Common App essay overview for juniors . We’ll get into more specific details later on how to write the Common App essay– and other personal statement topics in general– later in this article.

How important is a Personal Statement?

As we’ve mentioned, the personal statement is your chance to stand out in a pool of applicants. It’s an extremely important part of any college application. A personal statement for college will be a requirement of nearly every application you complete. Admissions will use your personal statement to get a sense of who you are beyond your grades and scores. So, if you want to show colleges what makes you unique, your personal statement is the place to do it. Figuring out how to write a personal statement is key to a successful application. 

Seeing what works when it comes to your personal statement for university can be a helpful first step. U.S. News breaks down the process of writing a personal statement and gives some successful personal essay examples. Reading another student’s successful personal statement example will give you an idea of what impresses admissions. It may even get you excited about writing your own personal statement for college! 

While every school will likely require some sort of personal statement, it may actually be used differently in the admissions process. How your personal statement is judged during the admissions process will depend on a school’s size, ranking, acceptance rate , and various other factors. Larger state schools will likely put the most importance on an applicant’s grades and scores while spending little time reviewing a student’s personal statement. 

Especially important at top tier schools

However, at Ivy League schools and other elite institutions, many students have the same impressive grades, scores, and extracurriculars. The personal statement allows these schools to distinguish between high-achieving students. If you’re looking at these types of institutions, then a lot of importance should be placed on writing a personal statement that is unforgettable and impresses admissions. 

So, we know that learning how to write a personal statement is key to many successful applications, but you may be thinking: what’s the difference between a personal statement and supplemental essays? Every school you apply to via the Common App will receive an identical copy of your Common App essay. The Common App essay serves as your personal statement. 

However, each school will have their own supplemental requirements, which may include additional supplemental essays . For schools with many supplemental college essay prompts, your personal essay may not have as much of an impact on your overall application. Admissions officers will see your writing style, and likely your personality, in all of the college essay prompts you submit. 

Additional personal statements

Still, you should always treat your personal essay with the utmost care. It can make a huge difference in the admissions process. You may also need to write other personal statements when applying to scholarships or specific programs . It’s good to get used to the process and the personal statement format during college application season. 

When should I start writing my Personal Statement?

When it comes to all things in the college application process, including any college application essay, it’s best to start early . Don’t leave your personal statement for a university until the last moment. Writing a personal statement will take time. The sooner you start your personal statement for college, the more likely you are to succeed. 

This doesn’t mean that you should start writing your personal statement for university the summer before your sophomore year. High school is a time for development, and colleges want to get to know you at your most mature. It’s just good practice to start thinking about how to write a personal statement early on. 

Review personal statement examples

Think about personal statement format, personal statement topics, and personal statement ideas. Look at other students’ personal statement examples. You can start jotting down potential ideas for your personal essay for college at any time, which may be useful down the line. But, you don’t need to actually start writing your personal statement until the summer before your senior year .

Be open-minded to changing your personal statement topic as you grow and discover new things about yourself. Check out this personal statement webinar on how one student switched her personal essay for college at the last moment. Just like there is no set personal statement format, there are no rules against mixing up your topic as you see fit. But, at least try to allow yourself some time to revise and edit your personal essay for college to perfection.

What do I write in a personal statement?

There’s no one-size-fits-all outline when it comes to how to write a personal statement. Your personal statement for university will depend on your own background, interests, and character. Overall, it’s not the personal statement topics that will catch the eye of admissions officers– it’s how you write your story that will. You need to know how to write a personal statement that not only checks the boxes but is also powerful . 

Important things to keep in mind when writing your personal statement: 

Choose a topic you’re passionate about.

What would you be excited to write about? Chase the personal statement topics that seem fun to write, think about, and talk about. If you’re passionate about your personal statement, your audience will feel it and be engaged. 

Really be you

Authenticity is key when it comes to writing a personal statement. After all, it’s your chance to tell your story and really show admissions who you are. Whatever you write about, make sure it is true, honest, and authentic to your experiences.

Give it some flair

Ok, we don’t mean do something too unconventional like a personal statement haiku. But, you should show off your writing style in your personal statement for college. Admissions officers want to get to know you and your writing. 

Knowing how to start a personal statement or how to start a college essay, in general, is often the most difficult part of the process. You’ll want to brainstorm some personal statement topics to get your creative juices flowing. CollegeAdvisor.com offers a masterclass on brainstorming personal statement topics for the Common App essay in case you need some help with how to start a college essay or a personal statement. 

Still have doubts? Read more on how to write a personal statement and get some college essay tips from CollegeAdvisor.com’s admissions experts. It will also be helpful to look at some successful personal essay examples and understand why they worked . Good personal statement examples can inspire you to tackle writing your own personal essay for college.  

Exploring Personal Statement Topics

It seems logical that when exploring the process of how to write a personal statement, you should start thinking about personal statement ideas. What are the best topics to write about in a personal statement? If you look at various successful personal statement examples, you’ll likely realize the topic isn’t necessarily the most important part. You don’t need to write about something that no one else has ever written about. You just need your personal statement to have its own unique spin. Lean into brainstorming personal statement ideas that show who you are. It’s helpful to read some personal statement examples for inspiration. 

While there is no exact formula for “how to write a personal statement”, there are some basic guidelines that students should follow. The personal statement should be written in first-person nonfiction prose form. Often, a personal statement introduction will include a story or an anecdote and then expand to reveal the impact of that experience on the writer. 

You may be specifically wondering how to start a personal statement. Well, it could be with a moment, a place, or a conversation that spurred some sort of change or growth within you. While this isn’t necessarily a “personal statement format,” it’s a very general format that works. 

Things to avoid

We now know that the personal statement format is fluid, but there are some things to avoid when thinking about how to write a personal statement: 

  • Profanity, explicit content, or crude language. 
  • Lying or misinterpreting events. Keep it authentic. 
  • Sharing overly personal descriptions of troubling life experiences. Remember that applying to college requires professional boundaries. 
  • Writing a narrative that revolves around others. The personal statement is all about you and your experiences. 

If you want to know what a bad personal statement example would look like, imagine one that includes any of the formerly listed items. You don’t want to catch an admissions officer’s attention for the wrong reasons. Good personal statement examples will be engaging, but inoffensive. Check out some more do’s and don’ts when it comes to how to write a personal statement.   

When pondering “how to write a personal statement,” it’s good to know that you don’t need to follow conventional essay guidelines. The best personal statement examples will exude passion and professionalism, while a bad personal statement example will lack soul. If you’re excited about a topic, then that’s a great place to start! Now, let’s get into the actual writing. 

How do you write a good Personal Statement?

To review, in the first part of this series of three articles on how to write a personal statement we answered the question “What is a personal statement?” We also explained how schools use a student’s personal statement for college to evaluate them. We described the Common App essay as an example of a personal statement for a university. Next, let’s dig into how to write a personal statement, including how to start a personal statement, the best tips for writing a personal statement, and some good personal statement examples and personal essay examples to inspire you.

First, you have probably wondered how to write a personal statement that stands out from the rest. It all comes down to one thing: authenticity. The best personal statement examples and personal essay examples show schools what makes the writer unique, and they are written in an authentic voice. When giving advice about how to write a personal statement, admissions officers say that the best personal statement examples tell them who the student is beyond their coursework and grades. They are personal, and they tell a unique and interesting story.

Considering Personal Statement topics

So, as you think about how to write a personal statement, you may also wonder what the best personal statement topics are. When writing a personal statement, including the Common App essay, you don’t have to share an exciting story about the time you wrestled a wild bear or how you discovered a cure for cancer. For example, in their advice on how to write a personal statement, Wellesley College advises , “Tragedy is not a requirement, reflection and depth are.” 

Some of the best personal statement topics focus on insights about common experiences. Begin your brainstorming process by reviewing the list of Common App essay prompts as you think about writing a personal statement, and choose a story that genuinely matters to you. Then, get excited about telling it! Think about writing a personal statement, including the Common App essay and every other personal essay for college, as an opportunity to lean into your quirkiness or to share your unique insights.

What’s more, a good personal statement for a university should be well-written. Consider the advice offered by Purdue Online Writing Lab : “Be specific, write well and correctly, and avoid cliches.” This will take time—writing a good personal statement for a university or a good Common App essay doesn’t happen overnight. The process of writing a personal statement will include multiple sessions between the first phase of brainstorming and the final phase of editing. Be prepared to write and rewrite, and never hesitate to ask for help from an advisor, counselor, parent, or trusted adult. However, remember that your work should always be your own.

Now, let’s discuss how to start a personal statement.

How do you start a personal statement?

So, now you have the basic information on how to write a personal statement, including your Common App essay. Next, you’re probably asking, “But how do you start one?” In this section, we’ll break down the process of exploring personal statement ideas and how to start a personal statement. This information also applies to thinking about how to start a college essay. Then, we’ll discuss how to write a personal statement opening.

Brainstorming is usually the first phase of any writing project to generate personal statement ideas. You may want to read a personal statement example like those here or here for inspiration to help get your personal statement ideas flowing. Next, ask yourself some idea-generating questions : Who have your intellectual influences been?  Which careers are you considering and why? What personal goals do you have? As you think about the answers to these typical college essay prompts, jot down personal statement ideas that occur to you. If you’re still feeling stuck, ask a close friend or family member , “What do you think differentiates me?,” or “What are my quirks?”

Pick a topic that excites you

Then, once you have a few good topics for your personal statement, choose one that you feel most excited to write about. Write a draft of your personal statement introduction and see what other ideas occur to you for later parts of your essay. Choose another topic and do the same thing. Don’t feel like these initial drafts need to be perfect—words on the page are always a great start! The goal right now is to decide which personal statement topics you feel most inspired to write about. Which ideas reflect something interesting about you ? 

Once you have selected which topic you will focus on for your personal statement, Common App essay, or personal essay for college, think about crafting a strong hook. The opening line (or lines) of the best personal statement examples include a “hook” for the reader, grabbing their attention and making them want to keep reading. For example, you could start with a question, an unusual or surprising statement, or an anecdote that will leave readers wondering what comes next. Whichever approach you select when considering how to start a college essay, make sure to use engaging language and vivid imagery.

Remember, start early and write several drafts .

The personal statement is an opportunity to write about a topic that is important to you and that also reflects your personality . Now, let’s discuss the personal statement format.

How do you format a personal statement?

Different applications may require different approaches to your personal statement format. In some cases, you may copy and paste your personal statement into an application and it will format itself automatically. In other situations, you will need to set up your personal statement format yourself. If this is the case, Times New Roman font, 12-point, with conventional margins and double spacing is a safe personal statement format.

When you are submitting your personal statement or Common App essay through the Common App, you may notice that the Common Application text box only allows formatting for bold, italics, and underlining. Therefore, it’s best to write your personal statement in Google Docs or Word and to write your paragraphs with block formatting (not indented). In addition, using Google Docs or Word will also allow you to easily check spelling and word counts before pasting your personal statement into the Common App.

Editing your Personal Statement

Many students wonder what the editing process for their personal statement for college, including the Common App essay and other personal essays for college, should look like. This varies by student and by essay. But, the best personal statements for a university go through at least several rounds of edits.

Firstly, once you have written the first draft of your personal statement for a university or personal essay for college, take a step back for a few hours or even for a day. Then, return with fresh eyes. Is your narrative well organized? Are there sections that seem unclear, ideas that don’t support your main point, or awkward sentences? You may want to reorder your paragraphs or sentences or delete and rework other elements. Revisit a personal statement example and consider how it is organized for comparison. 

Making the cut

In short, don’t be afraid to cut sentences that don’t directly relate to the main focus of the essay or convey some important detail of the story. This will help clarify your narrative. Also, make sure that you have centered your writing around your own experiences—the story should reflect your perspective and insights.

Next, once you are confident that your personal statement is well organized and your main ideas are clear, do another round of detailed editing. Eliminate any typos or repetitive language; make sure you have proper grammar and spelling throughout.

Finally, ask a trusted adult to read your personal statement and provide feedback. Something that you thought was clear may not be to them. Also, ask them how engaging your personal statement is, and if there are sections that seem dry or unimportant. Ask whether your hook is effective, and review tips on how to start a personal statement if necessary. Sometimes feedback can be difficult to hear, but it helps to remember that even professional writers seek input from others. The goal is to create the best personal statement possible!

For more detailed advice on revising your personal statement, check out this CollegeAdvisor personal statement webinar, “ Revising the Personal Statement .”

How do I know when my personal statement is done?

There’s no definitive way to know when your personal statement for a university is done—you can keep editing most writing forever. However, as you revise and edit, you’ll notice that you have fewer things to fix with every new draft. Once you feel like there’s nothing major left to change, get feedback from someone you trust. 

Your College Advisor expert can also provide valuable feedback and guidance at this point. If the notes and suggestions from others are also limited, you may be nearly ready to finalize your personal statement for college and press “submit.”

6 Tips for Writing a Great Personal Statement 

1. be authentic.

Remember, admissions officers want to know about you —your personality, your interests, your goals. A great personal statement is personal . Your personal statement for a university needs to express your unique ideas and insights in your own voice. Nobody can tell your story better than you. So, choose a topic that interests you and let your energy and ideas shine through.

Being personal also means that you should share sensory details and your internal dialogue. What did you see or hear at a critical moment? What were you thinking or feeling during that pivotal conversation? The more personal details you share, the more interesting your personal statement will be.

2. Start early

This is one of the most important tips on how to write a personal statement. You can start brainstorming topics for your personal statement at any time during high school. Some students keep a notebook where they write down personal statement topics and ideas as they occur to them over time. They also begin reading other good personal statement examples and Common App essays for inspiration. 

Regardless, a good plan is to solidify a draft of your personal statement for college the summer before your senior year. This will give you time to work on supplemental essays and other parts of your applications during the fall of your senior year.

3. Brainstorm before you write

Take some time to think and reflect deeply before you begin writing. Don’t feel like you need to jump into a full essay draft as soon as you complete your junior year. Do some writing exercises and brainstorming activities first, including reading other personal statement examples. 

In each personal statement example you read, pay close attention to the personal statement introduction, the narrative arc, and the conclusion. Did the writer incorporate an effective technique for how to start a college essay? Why is the essay interesting? What does it tell you about the writer? 

4. Tell a story

Keep in mind that well-told stories have a beginning, a middle, and an end. They also engage the reader and arrive at a clear message or point by the end. In short, the best personal statement examples follow a narrative arc. 

Start with an interesting hook and use it as an introduction to a story from your life that addresses the given college essay prompt. Then, use the latter half of your personal statement or Common App essay to show why this story matters and how it reveals a key part of your identity. And always remember: show, don’t tell.

5. Avoid common mistakes

Steer clear of cliches in your writing—they do not help you stand out or demonstrate strong writing skills. Also, do not use your personal statement or Common App essay as an opportunity to rehash your activities or achievements. Remember, these are included in other parts of your application. 

The best personal statement examples show admission officers something about the writer that is not reflected in other parts of the application. They describe first-hand experiences and provide specific examples to illustrate ideas.

6. Edit carefully

Once you’ve written your personal statement for college, look for anything that doesn’t feel right. Eliminate awkward phrasing, delete or replace repeated words and phrases, and work to streamline your language. You might delete entire drafts, and that’s okay! It’s a process, and all the work you do gets you closer to your best work. Also, make sure to ask a few others whom you trust to read your essay and provide suggestions for edits.

Bonus tip: Ask for help

A second set of eyes can make a huge difference. Ask an advisor (like our team at CollegeAdvisor.com), counselor, or parent to look over your work. Don’t let anyone write your sentences for you—instead, use their input to help your voice shine through. 

For more great college essay tips on how to write a personal statement and college essays, check out this advice from college admission experts.

Personal Statement- Frequently Asked Questions

Where can i find a good personal statement example.

There are a variety of websites that offer good personal essay examples as models you can use to inspire you. A good place to begin is here , and there are also examples of personal statements in the next article of this series. As you read these examples, take note of the personal statement introduction, as well as how the writer focuses the essay on a specific topic or idea that reflects their personality.

Is it ever too late to change my personal statement?

While it is much better to begin writing your personal statement early, sometimes students decide later in the writing process that they want to rethink the personal statement topic they have chosen. If you find yourself in this position, you will find some helpful advice in this CommonApplicant.com personal statement webinar . 

My parents didn’t go to college. How do I explain personal statements and how to write a personal statement to them?

CollegeAdvisor.com has created a special personal statement webinar just for parents. In this webinar, we describe personal statements, the specifics of how to write a great college essay, and other college admissions terms.

I’m a high school junior. What should I be doing now to prepare to write my personal statement and college essays?

First, congratulations on thinking ahead! You can begin by reading “ Common App Essay Overview for Juniors .” Then, your CollegeAdvisor admissions expert can help you begin brainstorming and planning for your college application essays. They can provide you with examples of common college essay prompts, as well as helpful college essay tips. Also, they can provide suggestions on how to start a personal statement and share other resources on how to write a great college essay.

How will college admission officers evaluate my personal statement and college application essay?

Admission officers are looking for personal stories that are well told. How closely each of your college application essays is read will vary depending both on the school and the other components of your application. However, as more schools become test-optional, admission officers say that college essays are becoming even more important in the admissions process. So, as you plan your essays keep in mind that admission officers want to learn about you —your experiences, thoughts, and goals. They also want to see that you have solid writing skills, so make sure that you closely edit your essays before you submit them.

If you would like to hear directly from an admission officer and learn more about how to write a great college essay, including specific advice on how to start a college essay, check out this “ 39 Essay Tips ” article.

How is the personal statement for a university different from the Common App essay and personal essay for college? 

The Common App essay asks students to write a personal statement in response to one of seven provided prompts. All types of personal essays for college provide students with an opportunity to introduce themselves to college admission officers on their own terms. For a more detailed description of each of these types of essays, check out the first article in this series, “How to Write a Personal Statement.”

For answers to more frequently asked questions about personal statements for college and college essays, click here .

In the first part of this series discussing how to write a personal statement, we answered the questions “What is a personal statement?” and “How important is the personal statement?” In this second article of the series, we have covered the specifics of how to write a personal statement, including descriptions of the writing phases of the personal statement and personal essay for the college writing process. In the next article, we will examine personal statement examples and highlight key elements of each personal statement example. 

Introducing 5 Personal Statement Examples

By this point, you’ve gone from asking, “What is a personal statement?” to knowing how to write a personal statement. Now, let’s look at some personal statement examples. Reading personal statement examples is great preparation for writing your own personal statement for college.

However, keep in mind that reading about how to write a personal statement is one thing–writing a personal statement is entirely different. By reading these personal statement examples and why they worked, you’ll have a better grasp of how to write a personal statement.

Each of these personal statement examples shows something that isn’t clear in the rest of the application. Top schools accepted all the writers of these personal statement examples. Our guide will walk you through each of these personal essay examples and discuss what makes them work. We hope by reading these, you can learn more about how to write a personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #1: Choosing a Great Topic

The first of our personal statement examples was written by a student who was accepted to Yale, Princeton, and other top schools. Their personal statement discusses the legacy of antisemitic violence in their family. While political and religious topics can be difficult, this student writes a fantastic college application essay about their topic.

Personal Essay Example #1

Across the ocean, there is war. Children mistaking rockets for fireworks, parents too protective—too careful—to correct them.          Back home, there are phone calls. To family, to friends. In English, in Hebrew.          “Are you safe?”         I pray they live far from Jerusalem.          Right here, in my room, there is turmoil.          Furiously swiping through Instagram, I wonder who will betray me next. I wonder which friend will decide that their loosely related, offensive commentary belongs on their profile.          Once the deed is done, I am quick to unfollow. To cut off perpetrators of what Jewish journalists call “the Social Media Pogrom”: when targeting the Jewish people online turns to real antisemitic violence (and a powerful reason to unfollow my friends).          So I flee from my friends’ Instagram accounts. But only because my family fled from much worse.          My grandfather found himself wearing a yellow star, living in a ghetto, and losing everything to the Nazis. One day, he ripped off the star and ran. Even though it meant never seeing his family again.          He did not flee for a better life; he fled for any life.          His son came to marry another refugee: my mother. Her story is a familiar one, shared by many in my hometown: escaping yet another antisemitic regime whose existence threatened her own, my mother fled Revolutionary Iran in 1979. Fortunately, she was reunited years later with all eight of her siblings, who had escaped in various other creative, illegal ways—“on camelback” being a personal favorite.           To this day, she bears a scar on her eyelid from antisemitic violence back home.          My family tree’s roots are settled in the soil of persecution. Swastikas have sawed away at its structure, and Revolutionary Guards have bent its branches. I know too well which winds will threaten the leaves: words wishing my people death, implicitly or explicitly. Calling on my cousins to evacuate their homes, for they are on the Jewish side of the land dispute. Denying the reality that no one deserves to be displaced.         When I hear these words, see them on a screen, I sense a chillingly familiar breeze. Sometimes, the breeze blows away a few leaves: a rabbi is stabbed, a synagogue vandalized.          Suddenly my friends, teetering on the edge of antisemitism with waves of painful posts, are no longer my friends. They are my enemies.          But then I hear a little voice:         “David, what on Earth are you doing?”         And I remember that they are not. They are not Nazis or Revolutionary Guards. I should not shun them or cease to show them love. I cannot wallow in my rage or simply “unfollow”—not on Instagram, not in life.          I soon return those beloved friends to my circle. I “follow” them once again.         Because dialogue is my lifestyle. I ought to be recruiting my friends to Model Congress or engaging them in class. Welcoming the people around me to a world of positive, exciting, and purposeful discourse is the best I can do. It’s also who I am.          My family passed down a sensitive radar for harmful rhetoric, but also gifted me with a powerful belief—a Jewish belief—in informed discussion and coexistence. Holding no hate in their hearts, my ancestors wore lenses of love that did not belong to their oppressors.         Today, I wear those same lenses with pride. Once infuriating Instagram posts no longer cloud my vision. I’ve instead fallen in love with the precious diversity of thought that surrounds me and find myself most at home when I am immersed in political dialogue.          I will face many “enemy” opinions, but I will not shut my eyes and cover my ears, give up a dear human connection, and miss out on a meaningful experience.            I will approach individuals with humanity rather than animosity, acceptance rather than judgement, and love rather than hate.          I will live by the lessons of my ancestors. 

What Worked?

What did this Common App essay do well? Firstly, it covers a great topic. This student writes about their family’s experience with antisemitic violence and its legacy in their life today. When writing a personal statement for college, such sensitive personal statement topics can be challenging. In this case, the writer successfully centers their experiences and thoughts rather than on controversial events.

Moreover, they cut through political tension with a core reality rooted in empathy: “No one deserves to be displaced.” This is a great strategy if you’re wondering how to write a personal statement on a sensitive topic. All personal statement topics have an angle that makes them universally relatable. If your personal essay for college is missing something, try an empathetic approach.

Ask for help revising

Don’t forget to ask other people to revise your personal statement for university. What makes sense to you may not read well to others. Especially with sensitive topics, share your work with someone you can trust to give you feedback. If possible, also include a non-family member like a teacher or guidance counselor who knows how to write a personal statement.

This student connects their family’s troubles with their own worldview. Good personal statement examples offer a look at the author as a person. A strong topic lets you reflect on how your experiences have impacted your engagement with the world and other people. And as shown above, the writer chose a great topic –not necessarily a great college essay prompt. College essay prompts are wide-ranging , and good personal statement ideas can come from any of them. Indeed, whatever your prompt is, personal essay examples are ultimately about you . 

Evocative language and imagery

With this in mind, look at how the writer’s attitude changes throughout their Common App essay. Good personal statement examples contain precise, evocative language and imagery. When you’re writing a personal statement, find the right words—not necessarily the longest ones—and sentence structures you need. This personal statement begins in a panic; the writer “furiously swiping” in the “turmoil” of their room, keenly attuned to betrayal from friends. These words and the short paragraphs bring each thought into sharp focus.

The writer’s passion for their subject shows through their language. Using structural repetition in “Wishing…. Calling…. Denying…” establishes a serious tone and keeps the personal statement fresh. In the latter half, words like “beloved,” “lenses of love,” and “precious diversity” signify a shift to a gentle, loving attitude. The best personal essay examples choose their words precisely. By choosing words carefully in combination with poetic and rhetorical devices, you can write a stellar personal statement for university.

Certainly, family histories can be great personal statement topics. Even so, suffering doesn’t automatically make a strong personal statement for university. If you know how to write a personal statement, even at first mundane personal statement ideas can become good personal statement examples.

Personal Statement Example #2: Finding a Great Hook

The second of our personal statement examples is by a student who was accepted to UC San Diego, Johns Hopkins, the University of Pennsylvania, Vanderbilt University, and more. In their personal statement for college, this student uses their interest in Rubik’s cubes to frame other parts of their life.

Personal Statement Example #2

My life is as simple as a Rubik’s Cube: a child’s toy that can be solved in 20 moves or less IF and only if enough knowledge is gained. I received one on my 9th birthday and over the following months, I became obsessed with it.  I rotated the rows aimlessly, hoping that eventually the cube would solve itself. I was naive about the complexity of the cube which led me to apply some research. I began looking up tutorials on YouTube about solving the toy and was in awe over the amount of work that had to be done. I forced myself to go step by step until I could arrange a single face, and my progress pushed me forward until I could solve 4 of the 6 faces of the cube. Every night for an hour I would randomize the colors again and work my way back to ⅔ of the cube being complete. Until this point, I lacked the confidence in my everyday life and had never aimed for a difficult goal, especially one without external motivation. However, what I love about solving the cube is that you can follow the steps perfectly and still run into a stalemate based on the arrangement of the squares. This forces you to randomize the cube again and start from step 1. All the hard work and time put into this object can be useless, but it is unavoidable no matter what you do. Multiple times I faced this dilemma of running into a wall, but instead of giving up, my will pushed me forward. I shed many tears over my failures to solve a child’s toy. I needed to push through these failures until I could learn how to arrange the last faces of the cube. And just like that, it was complete! The Rubik’s Cube was arranged correctly. However, I wanted to get faster. I was inspired by the greatest, the individuals who could solve cubes within 5 seconds, and mix up the cube once more. I tried over and over until the point of obsession where I could get the cube arranged in under a minute. Sometimes it is necessary to disarrange a completed face of the cube in order to achieve the end goal of every face being complete. The colors of a cube can be compared to my academics, my athletics, my art, my leadership, my hobbies, and my family life. Though it is a struggle to juggle all these tasks, it is the desire to expand in all these subjects that pushes me forward. I want to learn more and master subjects within my academics, improve my form and get faster within my athletics, grow my skills of digital design within art, become a stronger role model as a leader, volunteer more within my hobbies, and get closer to supporting my family.  This mindset will continue to push me to expand my present knowledge and learn new concepts in order to complete my goals. 43,252,003,274,489,856,000: That is how many combinations there are for a single 3×3 Rubik’s cube, and there are probably even more combinations ahead of me in my journey through college and beyond. I have to struggle to learn how to solve my cube and put in the hard work in order to succeed at this game of life. Once I finish school and solve my cube for the first time, the game is not over. The next steps are to refine my work and ethics until I can get the process of solving my own cube down to 20 moves or less. My life goal is to carve a name for myself among the best and the brightest in the surgical field, yet there is always more knowledge to obtain which will drive me to continue growing.

Take a look at that hook! The classic personal statement format begins with a hook to draw the reader into a story, and this is no different. This personal statement introduction, “My life is as simple as a Rubik’s cube”, is bold, even seemingly contradictory, until you read the rest of the sentence. Either way, it makes you want to keep reading this personal statement example. 

The worst thing a personal statement for a university can be is boring. A good hook starts your reader off on the right foot. While many personal statement examples begin in the middle of a story, making a bold claim is also common. If you’re wondering how to start a personal statement, start thinking about what opening sentence would grab your attention.

Like the first essay’s writer, this student also uses descriptive language to bring their Common App essay to life. They didn’t simply try the Rubik’s cube, but they “rotated the rows aimlessly”. Rather than saying they kept working on the cube, the writer shows us how they scrambled and resolved it every night. When writing a personal statement, do your own experiences justice with the right descriptive language .

Thinking about tone

You may notice the tone of this personal essay example is very different from the first– intensity isn’t everything! In fact, it’s a reflection of the different subject matter of these personal essay examples. When writing your personal statement, your tone should match what you are trying to say. In the same way that one word can make a sentence, another can totally break it. 

From a vivid description of their childhood, the writer expands the scope of their Common App essay to other areas of their life. Good personal statement examples explore subjects that other parts of your application don’t. In this case, this student uses the Rubik’s cube to represent their varied activities and their aspirations for each. They also reflect on life lessons and personal traits: perseverance, ambition, and curiosity.

In other words, the writer creates parallels between their interest in Rubik’s cubes and their personal journey. In the same way that they obsess over speed-solving, the writer works to excel in other subjects. Furthermore, the writer shows us this instead of directly telling — a maneuver fundamental to all good personal statement examples. The writer makes a compelling case as not only an applicant but also as a future member of the campus community. 

Consider chronology

Notice the chronological structure this student uses for their Common App essay. Specifically, see how it follows the writer’s life from their first Rubik’s cube to the present day. This is a simple way to craft a strong Common App essay. Personal essay examples like this make it easy to reflect on your growth, which is crucial for any personal statement for college. Lastly, by ending with the 20 moves needed to solve a cube, the writer neatly ties up this personal statement example.

Personal Statement Example #3: The Value of a Great Ending

The third of our personal statement examples is by a student who got into the University of Michigan-Ann Arbor, Carnegie Mellon, and the University of Southern California. The writer talks about how being on the swim team helped them cultivate confidence.

Personal Essay Example #3

When I joined the high school swim team, I never expected to go to school dressed as Shrek. Yet as Freshman Friday approached, I learned it was team tradition for upperclassmen swimmers to dress freshmen teammates in ridiculous costumes. Against my will, my teammates splotched green paint on my face, styled my hair into pigtails covered in green paper, and stuffed a pillow under my sweatshirt. Attending my classes was mortifying. With every stare, I buried my head further into my textbook and shifted my hand to cover my green and now bright red face; with every chuckle, I sank deeper into my seat, attempting to hide my massive pillow stomach. The frown on my face felt like a permanent fixture, and after dealing with the humiliation for a class period, I was done. I yanked the pillow out of my sweatshirt and ripped the paper from my hair. The only hint of swamp ogre that remained was the green face paint. When confronted about my lack of Shrek-ness at the end of the day, I claimed I was overheating and that the paper had fallen apart.  I lied. I was just embarrassed. I always knew I was shy — the “too-timid-to-signal-the-waiter” type of shy — but until Freshman Friday, I hadn’t realized the extent to which it affected the social and academic aspects of my life. Ever since I was young, my jaw would clench at the thought of humiliating myself by deviating from the norm and bringing attention to myself. I often closed myself off from friends by diverting conversations to trivial topics like gym class when they probed me about deeper subjects like my mental health. I even avoided participating in class by scouring Google for hours for physics help to circumvent admitting to my classmates that I was confused by asking questions. By hiding in the shadows to avoid embarrassment, I hindered my ability to cherish the humor in being Shrek, and, more broadly, my comfort in freely expressing myself.  However, I loved swimming and wanted to make my high school team’s environment as wonderful for me as my love for the sport. I slowly started creeping out of my shell, meeting the team, and participating in more voluntary dress-up days. Freshman year, I wore a dragon onesie on pajama day; sophomore year, I wore a Hawaiian shirt, a lei, and sunscreen for tacky tourist day. Junior year, I wore my swimsuit over leggings, goggles, medals, pigtails with award ribbons, and a towel cape, finally surpassing the ridiculousness of the Shrek costume. For the first time, I finally felt confident enough to prance around the school, laughing about my costume with my classmates. I felt like a true part of my team, joking with teammates, taking pictures, and letting the whole school know that I swam. With each year and its dress-up days, I gradually felt more of the sense of community, team spirit, and fun that I had craved.  Dressing up unleashed my confidence. This, in turn, made me happier and more involved in my school community. Most surprisingly, though, was how dressing up eventually better prepared me to enter engineering. Hispanic women are severely underrepresented in engineering, so I used to fear that I would be incapable of establishing a strong enough presence and earning my peers’ respect for my ideas. However, with every group discussion I initiated, every question I asked, and every club meeting I hosted, I saw myself making a place for my input and noticed that my teachers and peers actually valued it. I realized that I had found my voice and even enjoyed sharing my opinions. I’m now ready to take on the challenge of expressing my thoughts in a male-dominated field. In the meantime, I’m just looking forward to my swim team’s next dress-up day.

Like our last essay, this personal statement has an awesome hook. In fact, the writer drops us right into the action. This technique, known as in media res , is great for a Common App essay. You can immediately set the scene for your reader, then build context from there. Not only does the writer bring us right in, but they also expertly use language for tone. “Ridiculous,” “against my will,” and “splotched” all illustrate the writer’s opposition to what’s about to happen. This is an effective technique in personal statement examples.

Following the anecdote, the writer reflects on their intense shyness. They show self-awareness by recounting specific instances where fear got the better of them. Yet again, we can see the importance of showing rather than telling in a personal statement. Each sentence provides an example of how the writer’s shyness had a negative impact on their social and academic success. Thus, we see the true conflict in this personal statement isn’t the costume, but the writer overcoming their lifelong shyness. 

Personal growth and development

Ask anyone how to write a personal statement and they’ll tell you about growth. When writing a personal statement for university, demonstrating personal growth and an ability to reflect on it is key. Across college essay prompts, you should explore how your experiences have shaped or changed you. Being able to indicate specific causes and effects is part of all good personal statement examples.

From there, the writer clearly illustrates their journey from insecurity to confidence. They show us the ways that their shyness manifested before. Then, the writer shows us the increasingly ridiculous costumes they wore. Of course, the language changes, too—the writer goes from “creeping” to “prancing”! Yet another example of how small changes to wording can have a huge impact on your personal statement for college.

Finally, the writer provides a sound conclusion. They mention the numerous benefits of their newfound confidence and, more importantly, look forward. In the final paragraph, the writer takes the lessons they’ve learned and discusses how they will use them to accomplish their goals. Like both of the personal essay examples we’ve already seen, the writer closes by talking about the doors they want to open.

Circling back to your hook

We saw the effectiveness of linking the hook and closing paragraph in previous personal statement examples. Similarly, this personal statement example ends with the idea of dress-up day once again. This kind of personal statement format helps bring everything full circle. In learning about how to write a personal statement, the conclusion is one of the most important parts. Especially in chronologically structured personal statements, closing the loop in this way makes your personal statement feel complete .

The best personal statement examples have a well-written conclusion. Taking your personal statement ideas and addressing them neatly in the conclusion is important. Whether you explain particular future goals or simply affirm your personal values, you should have a future-facing closer. Colleges want to know not only how you’ve grown, but also how you will bring that growth to campus. 

Personal Statement Example #4: Why This Essay Worked

Fourth on our list of personal statement examples is by a writer who applied to performing arts programs. This student wrote about their love for the performing arts and their heritage. They were accepted to schools like NYU Tisch, Point Park, and Roosevelt University. Look for the college essay tips we already mentioned in the personal statement below.

Common App Essay Example #4

At six years old, most kids I know get excited to help Blue find clues or recite Elmo’s songs on Sesame Street. So you can imagine my family’s surprise when they saw me ignoring the other kids to go belt alongside my grandfather’s mariachi trio in the backyard. Growing up, I had always loved performing for people. But my passion for performing in front of a packed house never compared to performing for my favorite audience: my great grandmother. From age seven to twelve, my dad would take our family on a three-hour road trip to visit my great grandmother’s nursing home every single weekend. I remember the clean, antiseptic smell, and the beeping of her oxygen concentrator as I perched myself next to her bed and sang all types of songs from romantic boleros to earwormy Disney tunes. Even as she began failing to recognize her loved ones due to her worsening Alzheimer’s, she would always remember me, her “palomita blanca,” or white dove. But as I got older, singing what once were innocent songs, like “Edelweiss” or “Almost There,” started to make me feel like an imposter. I knew I belonged on stage, but I never saw any Mexican representation in any of my favorite musicals and animated cartoons. By seventh grade, I was plucking away at my full eyebrows for community theatre the night before auditions because I was told it would give me a better chance at landing a lead role. When my great grandmother passed away, I had lost the person who constantly reminded me how powerful staying true to your identity is. Without her, I questioned whether I had a chance at pursuing the thing that lights my soul aflame. But I stuck through the late nights, sprained ankles, and endless sweating under stage lights, because I loved theatre more than anything else in the world. In my freshman year, I joined the Conservatory of the Arts program for dance and drama at my high school. After my first show, I remember feeling so comforted by the fact that I finally felt that I belonged in the theatre kid community. In sophomore year, I finally got my first lead role as Gertrude in my high school’s production of Seussical. At last! All of my hard work had paid off and I was going to be a lead after six years of ensembles. I was so excited to get the chance to show myself and the world that my identity was my power. I didn’t want to be any old Gertrude. I’d stay up until 2 a.m. on weekends coming up with ways to make her more memorable. Inspired by Juan Gabriel’s emotional ballads, I added vocal cry to Gertrude’s solos to better portray her insecurities. Instead of sticking to just belting in “All For You,” I sang runs similar to the high energy mariachi songs I grew up with to show off my character’s passion and newfound confidence. But in March 2020, the world stopped, and the show couldn’t go on. Distanced learning made the performing arts programs nowhere near as fun or educational as they used to be. Still though, as president of the drama program in 2021, I am determined to rebuild a community that was torn apart by a worldwide pandemic. I want to be the mentor I never had. My confidence in my identity has been an important tool in teaching others that practice doesn’t make perfect, it makes progress. I work hard encouraging others not to be afraid to show the world what they have. Musical theatre is an art that thrives with innovation, so I’d like to bring the creative spice which my culture has enriched me with to the world’s stage. Maybe someday I can be that actress on stage or TV that’ll get a little Latina girl enthralled by the arts.

In this personal essay example, the writer uses vivid storytelling to show how they became the person they are today. Firstly, the hook tells us how the writer values both performance and her family. This light, fun personal statement introduction quickly goes for the heartstrings by introducing the writer’s great-grandmother. Personal statement examples sometimes avoid talking about family, because it’s easy to lose focus on the writer. But this writer never loses sight of their own memories, emotions, and experiences.

Equally important, those experiences are well-illustrated with rich imagery that clearly conveys the writer’s passion for their topic. Details like the smell and sound of the nursing home bring us into the moment. The writer also provides some examples of what they endured in theatre: “late nights” and “sprained ankles.” Use concrete images to get your personal statement ideas across with impact .

Also, the writer makes a point to explore the intersections of their Hispanic heritage and their passion for theatre. Particularly, the writer discusses their difficulty in putting them together, as shown by plucking their eyebrows. By establishing this conflict in the middle of her personal statement, the writer indicates their awareness of the wider world and their place in it. Many good personal statement examples will create context like this, showing the author thinking beyond themselves.

Show commitment to your topic

Broadly, the writer discusses their twin passions with powerful language and imagery. Exhibiting genuine enthusiasm for your personal statement topics is key. This personal statement shows that the writer has always been moved by their family and by the arts. Their triumph in combining the two feels huge precisely because we understand how much each of these things mean to them. Even if your personal statement topics aren’t as deep-seeded as this writer’s, you should show commitment to what you’re writing about.

If you’re reading this, COVID probably disrupted your school life at some point, as it did for this student. However, be careful not to linger on it more than necessary. This writer doesn’t completely gloss over the pandemic, but they keep their own journey at the center of the personal statement. The writer’s experience with distanced learning propelled them forward. Ideally, your personal statement for the university should keep a tight focus on you. The narrative personal statement format should show not only your experiences but also what you’ve learned from them.

Personal Statement Example #5: Pulling It All Together

The fifth and last of our personal statement examples is by another student who got into several top schools. They write about their participation and leadership at a club event. Keep an eye out for all the tips we’ve mentioned, from a good hook to showing-not-telling.

Personal Statement #5

One hundred and fifty bagels, all completely frozen. I couldn’t believe it. My school’s Model UN Conference was to start in thirty minutes, and breakfast for the delegates was nowhere near ready. I looked with dismay at my friends’ concerned faces peering out from behind piles of frozen bagels. As Secretary-General, it was my job to ensure that this conference went smoothly. However, it seemed that was not going to be the case. I took a moment to weigh my options before instructing Hannah, our “logistics coordinator,” to heat up the frozen circles of doom in the home-ec room. I knew Hannah enjoyed baking, so I trusted her to find a way into the locked room and thaw the assortment of bagels.  Cold bagels were not the only thing weighing heavily on my mind that morning. As I walked from classroom to classroom helping set up committees, I couldn’t help but feel nervous. Our conference wasn’t going to be like those of the private schools- there were no engraved pens or stylish water bottles. Instead, people got post-it notes and whatever pens we could steal from the supply closet. Forcing myself to stop worrying, I chose instead to think of why we made that choice. Since most of the food was donated, and all of the supplies had been “borrowed” from the supply closet, we could afford to charge only a nominal fee to everyone attending. Making Model UN accessible was one of my top priorities as Secretary-General; the same desire motivated me to begin including middle school students in the club. I hurried back down to the cafeteria, and was relieved to see that all the bagels looked warm and ready to eat.  The bagels would not be the sole crisis that day. As debates were about to start, one of the Chairs sent me a panic stricken text: “We only have 5 people in our committee! We can’t reenact the creation of the Treaty of Versailles!” I hurried to where his debate was taking place, and sure enough, only five people were there. I quickly considered my options- cancel the committee?  Convince some delegates to switch into this debate through bagel bribery? Or maybe, come up with a completely new topic?  I settled on idea number three. But what topic could a committee of only five people spend a day discussing? I mulled it over until an idea began to form. I explained to the room, “Each one of you will represent one of the five major Democratic and Republican presidential candidates. The chair will guide you as you tweet, make campaign videos, and debate the most important political issues.” I spent a few minutes figuring out how to go about moderating such an unconventional committee, before heading off to check in on the other debates.  As I walked from committee to committee, fixing problems and helping move debates along, I felt a sense of pride. I had spent months working on this conference, along with the other members of my team. At times, I worried I could never pull it off. A part of me had wished our faculty advisor would just organize the whole thing for us. After all, I’m just a high schooler, how could I put together such a big event? But as the day went by, I realized that with the help of my peers, I had done it. All the little crises that cropped up weren’t because I was doing a bad job; they were inevitable. The fact that I could find solutions to such a wide variety of problems was a testament to my leadership skills, and my level-headedness. I didn’t just feel like a leader—I felt like an adult. As I look towards my future in college and later the workforce, I know that I can succeed, even if my obstacles seem as insurmountable as a mountain of frozen bagels. 

This writer has a great example of how to start a college essay. Their strong hook makes us curious – why are there so many? What’s going on, and can the writer fix it? The essay’s tone is clear from the outset, and we’re drawn in by the conflict. Moreover, the writer establishes themselves as a leader and problem-solver.

Like a short story character, this writer encounters various obstacles. Throughout this personal statement, the writer shows off their resourcefulness, leadership skills, and quick thinking. While other people are in this personal statement example, the focus never wavers from the writer’s thoughts and actions. Additionally, the writer details the thought process behind each of their solutions.

As we’ve mentioned, a good personal statement for a university shows information, rather than telling it. This writer walks through various aspects of the conference in the second paragraph, then explains their reasoning. Instead of just saying they wanted to make the conference accessible, the writer shows us how they made it possible by organizing food donations and only charging a small fee. This Common App essay shows us what the writer is like through actions as well as words.

A narrative of learning and growth

As with our other personal statement examples, the writer wraps up with a strong conclusion that recalls the hook. They recount their personal growth throughout this process. In addition, the writer elaborates on the lessons they have taken from this experience. As shown above, introspection on personal growth and values is part of any good personal essay for college. This Common App essay makes a solid case for its writer as a future student and community member.

In sum, this writer takes a seemingly insignificant anecdote and uses it to reveal something critical about their experiences. By highlighting particular, telling moments, the writer shows us their personality and capability. What’s more, by using engaging language and a clear structure, the writer makes a lasting impact on the reader. For these reasons, this is a superb example of a personal statement for college.

CollegeAdvisor Resources on Writing a Great Personal Statement

By now, you’ve seen several personal statement examples and confidently say you know how to write a personal statement. But maybe you feel you need a little more information. A good personal statement for college starts with early preparation. Getting a head start on writing your personal essay for college is a great idea.

We at CollegeAdvisor have no shortage of guides on how to write a personal statement. We’ve got quick college essay tips from our admissions experts . If you have some more time, here are some frequently asked questions answered by an Admissions Officer. If you’re more of a watcher than a reader, check out a personal statement webinar from CollegeAdvisor.

How to Write a Personal Statement: Final Thoughts

You made it to the end! Now you know how to write a great college essay. Let’s briefly recap what we covered in this “How to Write a Personal Statement” guide.

Firstly, we answered the question, “What is a personal statement?” We outlined the expected length, personal statement format, and how important they are in the application process. Then, we explored some of the most common and effective personal statement topics.

Next, we looked at how to write a personal statement. We gave advice and tips on drafting, editing, and finalizing your personal essay for college. Specifically, we talked about the value of strong hooks, your unique voice, and editing.

Finally, we reviewed five personal statement examples and discussed what made them work. Each of our personal essay examples had effective language, structure, and other techniques that may inspire your writing.

Still a little stuck on how to write a personal statement for college? Aside from college essay tips and personal statement webinars, CollegeAdvisor also offers one-on-one support. We have hundreds of Admissions Experts and former Admissions Officers available to support you. Our Admissions Experts can work with you to help you craft a college application essay that highlights your potential.

This guide was written by Sarah Kaminski , Lori Dunlap , and Gina Goosby . No matter what stage you are at in your college search, CollegeAdvisor.com is here to help. We’ve created a wide range of guides, to help you navigate the college admissions process from building your school list all the way to packing for your freshman fall. For more specialized guidance on writing a personal statement, click here to schedule a free meeting with one of our Admissions Specialists. During your meeting, our team will discuss your profile and help you find targeted ways to increase your admissions odds at top schools. We’ll also answer any questions and discuss how CollegeAdvisor.com can support you in the college application process.

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Successful Personal Statement Examples: Step-By-Step Guide

Welcome to our comprehensive guide on crafting successful personal statements. In this article, we’ll walk you through a step-by-step process to help you master the art of personal statement writing. Whether you’re applying for university, a job, or a scholarship, a well-crafted personal statement can make all the difference. To aid your journey, we’ve curated personal statement examples from industry experts and successful applicants, providing invaluable insights and inspiration along the way. Now, let’s dive in and unlock the secrets to crafting a personal statement that truly stands out.

Table of Contents

What are personal statements.

In the context of university applications, a personal statement is a concise essay that allows applicants to showcase their personality. It also shows academic achievements, extracurricular activities, and aspirations. In addition, it serves as an opportunity for candidates to express their passion for their chosen subject. They can also demonstrate their suitability for the course, and differentiate themselves from other applicants.

Why are Personal Statements Important

Every admissions cycle, our team is inundated with a plethora of lacklustre statements that kick off with the cliché: ‘In my youth, my father introduced me to the classic board game, Monopoly. Since then, I’ve been fixated on pursuing a career in business.’ If this sounds familiar, kindly refrain. Simply put: don’t.

Personal statements are crucial components of university applications for several reasons:

Demonstrating Motivation and Enthusiasm

First, a well-written personal statement enables applicants to articulate their genuine interest and passion for the subject they wish to study. Admissions tutors often seek candidates who are enthusiastic about their chosen field, and a compelling personal statement can convey this enthusiasm effectively.

Highlighting Academic Achievements and Skills  

Secondly, personal statements provide a platform for applicants to showcase their academic achievements, relevant skills, and intellectual curiosity. By highlighting academic accomplishments and demonstrating the ability to think critically and analytically, candidates can present themselves as strong contenders for admission.

Showcasing Extracurricular Activities and Experience  

In addition, personal statements allow applicants to discuss extracurricular activities, work experience, volunteering, and other relevant experiences. These experiences provide evidence of a candidate’s broader interests, leadership abilities, teamwork skills, and commitment to personal and professional development.

Differentiating Applicants

Next, personal statements offer an opportunity for applicants to differentiate themselves from their peers. A well-crafted personal statement can certainly leave a lasting impression on admissions tutors and make a candidate stand out in a competitive pool of applicants.

Assessing Fit with the University and Course

Lastly, p ersonal statements enable admissions tutors to assess whether applicants are a good fit for both the university and the specific course they are applying for. By articulating their reasons for choosing the institution and demonstrating an understanding of the course content and structure, candidates can then convey their alignment with the university’s values, ethos, and academic requirements.

Personal Statement Examples

We have curated a comprehensive list of examples that you can refer to when writing your own personal statements. In this section, we cover various sections of your personal statement, all of which are equally important. 

Opening Statement to Justify your Course Selection

  • Short and simple : “I have always wanted to/ had the desire to… “
  • In order to be a…., it is very important to have a solid background in Y.
  • What fascinates me about X is … ” plus a specific explanation.
  • The role of (such and such profession) in (doing something vital in life/society) has been brought home to me by …. (add some experience/reading/etc.).
  • Since reading (some book) I have thought a great deal about (degree/something in the degree)” and then elaborate what was of particular interest in the book.
  • My interest in X stems from…
  • I’ve always loved (something related to the subject), and my favourite subject at school has always been… (and then say what you like about it).
  • My choice of degree/career was confirmed for me last year when I saw/read/ experienced…(plus detailed description conveying your enthusiasm)”.
  • X has always been my strongest academic subject and the field of study I have found most engaging(plus what and why).
  • Y is a subject that is relevant to (something important in the world)”.
  • When I was younger I wanted to / liked X… Person / Thing / Event X developed / changed/nurtured this interest to the extent that I now I am sure I wish to pursue X as a degree course.”
  • X (something in particular about the degree) has always fascinated me and for this reason I wish to pursue a degree in…

Personal Statement Examples Regarding your A-Level Subjects

  • Look back over your files, textbooks and homework, to remind yourself of what you have covered this year (should be fresh in your mind given the exams last week…).
  • What themes, topics, problems, relationships, connections, and debates have you found most interesting? Describe them.
  • Have you tried to follow any of these up by further research or reading? Mention it.
  • Did you come to any (perhaps only provisional) conclusions?
  • Would you look forward to exploring something you’ve come across at A level further at university, perhaps something that lies outside of your syllabus ?
  • If you’ve done some coursework this year, how has it deepened your appreciation of your subjects?

When discussing your A-level subjects, you can refer to the following sentence structures.

  • The X side of the A level course is an area which I find especially interesting (plus exactly what about it that does so).
  • I am also studying…
  • Studying (such and such degree) requires many skills (plus list of them ). My work on X in such and such a subject involved…(can also be used as intro to personal qualities section).
  • For me, the pleasure / fascination/joy/ attraction of studying X lies in (argument, close analysis, experimentation, problem – solving, exploration, whatever). Plus give examples of this from your studies.
  • During my study of XYZ at A level I have become especially interested in…
  • I take pleasure in many aspects of my A level course (plus examples and reflection on what is on the list of).

Personal Statement Examples for Work Experience

  • Being involved in a/professional / successful (type of company) allowed me the opportunity to (describe main tasks briefly). These duties developed skills in.
  • Working part-time in a (state the kind of business) has enabled me to develop my skills in (XYZ) by (describe the tasks that you did ).
  • I enjoyed working as a (state job) because it gave me valuable insight into (degree area). In particular I learned that…
  • Working voluntarily as a (……) provided a rewarding and valuable experience in (state experience and skills).
  • Shadowing a busy G.P at my local surgery taught me a great deal about the pressures on doctors’ time and the need for them to have excellent support staff and accurate, up-to-date records. Then give an example of where you saw this in practice.
  • Clerical work in a successful lawyer’s office last year taught me the importance of meticulous accuracy in reading documents which might have a bearing on the verdict in a criminal trial, and of the necessity to follow set procedures thoroughly in case of jeopardising a prosecution case.
  • The value of listening skills in my chosen career was brought home to me when I worked on a social services helpline at my local council office in the summer. I have learned to manage others in my work as the Saturday manager of my local branch of Burger King / of my father’s pharmacy. This has involved organising schedules, making sure health and safety standards are maintained and cultivating a cheerful and enthusiastic work atmosphere.
  • My familiarity with different kinds of computer software has allowed me to hold down a weekend job at a local internet cafe, where I have become used to dealing with different clients and their needs as well as indulging my love of problem-solving.

Personal Statement Examples for Community Service

  • Studying (degree subject) or such and such a career requires (dedication, teamwork, patience, sensitivity to others, a sense of responsibility, diplomacy, working to deadlines etc.) and these are qualities I possess / have developed in (helping at my local whatever, playing hockey, looking after X, my role as prefect, captain of tiddlywinks, work experience in etc.).
  • My interest in (degree topic) has led to an interest in / been supported by / (something extracurricular).
  • I believe that the individual can make a great contribution to society, so I am an active volunteer at…
  • My local community has always been very important to me, and in this regard I have…
  • I have always been taught that you only get out of life what you put in. I involve myself as much as possible in the life of my college / local community / etc.
  • I enjoy spending time outside the college contributing to the life of the community through involvement in clubs and societies.

Personal Statement Examples Regarding your Experience in School

  • A regular period of voluntary work with () gave me the chance to develop my communication skills with people of very different backgrounds and ages to my own.
  • I found raising money for Oxfam was a very rewarding opportunity to help others. I held a 24-hour sponsored fast and sold cakes I had baked myself on a stall outside school to raise £300. I would like to take on more responsibility to organise charity events while at university.
  • At college, I have been a member of the Student Council, taking turns to chair meetings from which proposals have been made to the Principal of the college. In this way, I have helped to persuade the college, for example, to improve its computer facilities and to add korfball to its sport curriculum.
  • Helping out at the college’s Open Days has given me a much better sense of the workings of a large organisation, and talking to parents of new students about the college has developed my confidence and communication skills.
  • As a prefect, I have learned how to exercise authority in a calm and judicious manner and to communicate effectively with people in higher positions, particularly in the role of monitor of the dinner queue, where my colleagues and I had to ensure orderly behaviour among 200 hungry teenagers.
  • As a library assistant, my duties included organising the book loan system. This experience has shown that I am responsible and capable of dealing with a range of people.

Personal Statement Examples for Other Interests

  • Being a member of the cast for A Streetcar named Desire was extremely rewarding. Acting has improved my self-confidence and public speaking skills. I hope to be involved in more dramatic productions at university.
  • Watching foreign films such as Amores Perras and City of God is a passion of mine and it has led to a broad interest in world literature/other cultures.
  • Last year I was introduced to African music, and since then I have developed a real interest in it, particularly the work of Mann Dibango and Fela Kuti, and I have also enjoyed finding out about the political context of the arts in Africa, as at the recent Africa exhibition at the Hayward Gallery.
  • In my spare time, I like to experiment with new recipes in the kitchen. I am really pleased to be getting to grips with the basics of Thai cuisine – as are my family!
  • Playing left-wing for the Hendon Wanderers 1 team over the last two years has been a really enjoyable and worthwhile experience, teaching me a lot about my own and other people’s character in terms of commitment and working in a group under pressure.
  • I have always enjoyed singing in my local church choir and hope to learn something about gospel/perform in light opera/form a blues band at university.
  • Outside college, I get great pleasure and good exercise from Latin American dancing, where I have reached level 6 over the last three years. Learning new routines has also taught me a lot about what kind of learner I am, and this self-knowledge has fed into my college work too.
  • My interest in problem-solving in Maths is also reflected in my desire to work out from local public records, exploring my family tree going back to the eighteenth century.

Frequently Asked Questions

Most universities recommend a maximum length of 4,000 characters or 47 lines, including spaces and blank lines.

It’s advisable to mention relevant courses or modules if they support your interest in the subject you’re applying for. However, avoid listing them without explaining their relevance to your academic or career goals.

While it’s tempting to reuse personal statements, it’s crucial to tailor each one to the specific requirements and ethos of each university. Admissions tutors can often spot generic statements, so it’s best to personalise each one.

Yes, mentioning relevant achievements or awards can bolster your application and showcase your abilities. However, focus on those that directly relate to your chosen course or demonstrate skills valued by universities.

The opening paragraph is crucial as it sets the tone for your entire statement. Aim to grab the reader’s attention with a compelling introduction that highlights your passion, motivation, and suitability for the course.

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What to include in a Personal Statement

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Personal Statement Tips

Nail your uni application with our personal statement examples.

Discover personal statements by subject, from A to Z. Find inspiration for your own application with these successful personal statement examples from real students.

A-Z of Personal Statements

Learn from previous student personal statements here. We have collated over 700 personal statement examples to help you on your university journey and to help you with how to write a personal statement.

These personal statement examples will show you the kind of thing that universities are looking for from their applicants. See how to structure your personal statement, what kind of format your personal statement should be in, what to write in a personal statement and the key areas to touch on in your statement.

A personal statement is a chance to tell your university all about you - a good personal statement is one that showcases your passion for the subject, what inspired you to apply for the course you’re applying for and why you think you would be an asset to the university.

Our collection includes personal statement examples in Mathematics, Anthropology, Accounting, Computer Science, Zoology and more.

Writing a personal statement has never been easier with our vast collection of personal statement examples.

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Personal Statement Help

What is a personal statement.

A personal statement is an essay written by a student applying to either a college or university. A personal statement is written and then uploaded to UCAS and is then attached to any university applications that the student may then make.

If you need more information check out our personal statement advice articles .

How to write a personal statement

There isn't a clearly defined personal statement template for you to use as each person's statement is different.

When it comes to writing a personal statement for universities, your personal statement should touch on your passions, your interest in the course, why you're applying for the course and why you would be an asset to the university you're applying to.

Talk about the clubs and societies that you belong to, any work experience you may have and any awards you might have won.

If you're still looking for information check out our article on how to write a personal statement .

How to start a personal statement

When it comes to starting your personal statement, the best thing to do is to be succinct and to have enough tantalising information to keep the reader informed and eager for more.

Your introduction should touch on your personal qualities and why you are applying for the subject you're applying for. Keeping things short and sweet means that it also allows you to break your personal statement up, which makes it easier for the reader.

We have plenty of advice for students that are wondering about what to include in a personal statement .

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How to Write a Personal Statement [Tips + Essay Examples]

personal statement example help

It’s one of the most critical, confusing, and stressful parts of the college application: the personal statement. As a component of the Common Application, the personal statement gives students the most control and the best opportunity to let the university get to know a little more about them. The predetermined prompts are broad enough that students can pretty much write about whatever they want, as long as it relates to their chosen essay question.

What Is a Personal Statement?

The personal statement is a short essay that allows the admissions committee to get to know more about you beyond your grades, test scores, extracurriculars, and recommendation letters. It should provide a compelling narrative that expresses your authentic voice and helps the committee understand who you are and how you would contribute to the campus community. Other parts of the college application don’t provide much insight into your personality, which is why the personal statement matters.     

Why the Personal Statement Is Important

When students think about what it takes to get into college, the first thing that usually comes to mind is good grades and test scores. While those “hard factors” are critical, the   college application evaluation also takes into account “soft factors,” or the application elements that aren’t so easily quantified — like essays, recommendations, extracurricular activities, and more. The essay is the most important soft factor that colleges consider, according to NACAC’s State of College Admissions report .

The personal statement, when used properly, can give admissions officers additional insight into who a student is as a person, what motivates them, and, more practically, how that student communicates and follows directions. An amazing personal statement isn’t going to guarantee admission, but it can positively impact a student’s application, while a poor personal statement can really hurt a student’s chances of getting in. This is why the personal statement shouldn’t be taken lightly. Students need to put a lot of effort into writing a great essay to enhance their chances of admission.

6 Tips to Help You Write a Great Personal Statement

Don’t rush the process of writing a personal statement. It can be intimidating — especially since the admissions committee is your audience — so allow yourself plenty of time to draft and revise. These six tips can help college-bound high school seniors write a great personal statement essay.

Reveal Something New About Yourself

We say this every year because it’s one of the essay tips students struggle with the most. In an attempt to show a specialty or passion, students can often be redundant and spend the length of the essay reiterating something else that’s already in the application. If marching band is on your activity list, the college already knows you enjoy music, so don’t spend your essay writing about what it means to play flute in the band.

Take this opportunity to give the admissions office insight into something new about you. Whether it’s how your religion impacts your education, how a mentor helped you realize your potential, or an event that’s shaped who you are today, write about something with substance that adds another dimension to your application.

Spend Time Brainstorming Topics

To reveal something new about yourself, choose a meaningful and original essay topic. While the Common Application essay questions are helpful, it’s up to you to choose a personal topic that ties in with the Common Application prompt you’ve selected. Take time to think about what’s important to you, what people or events have shaped you, and what you think is interesting about yourself.

Don’t just choose the most obvious topic, like the soccer team captain writing about winning the championship game. Instead, think of events, themes, life experiences, and more that are somewhat unique to you and how they’ve impacted you. Investing in brainstorming is key to writing a stellar personal statement.

The topic you ultimately choose must make for a strong narrative. To give you an example, Robin , an IvyWise College Admissions Counselor, shares what she wrote about in her personal statement.

Be Mindful of Word Choice, Tone, and Voice

Your essay should sound like you wrote it, so avoid this college application mistake and don’t overload it with long vocabulary words, complex sentence structure, or a lofty tone if that’s not how you normally write or speak. However, don’t be afraid to stretch your writing skills.

The personal statement should demonstrate your best writing, so take your time to carefully craft an essay that clearly conveys your story and your voice. Avoid redundant words or phrases, filler words that don’t add any value, or confusing language that muddles the message.

Practice, Practice, Practice!

It’s rare that anyone’s first draft is the perfect personal statement. Just like with anything else, you get better with practice. Write often, whether it’s in a journal, blog, or another outlet, as a way to improve and evolve your writing skills. When it comes time to pen your personal statement, practice that, too. Revise, revise, and then revise again. It often takes students many drafts before they have a personal statement that demonstrates their best writing and clearly conveys the essay’s message.

Don’t Procrastinate

A stellar essay isn’t usually written in a day. We advise students to get a head start on their personal statements by brainstorming topics and writing the first draft as early as the summer before the school year starts. That way, some of the most difficult work — choosing a topic and starting the writing process — is done before you head into a hectic senior year. However, we realize this isn’t always the case for students. No matter where you are with your personal statement, don’t wait to get feedback or help from your college counselor. The earlier you can get this essay done, the better!

Expand on Relevant Skills and Experiences

Your personal statement is an opportunity to expand on your skills and experiences. Weave these details into your narrative — how you developed and honed these skills and how they helped you personally and professionally. Did you learn more personal responsibility? Did you gain more self-confidence? Did you realize that you are a natural leader? These are all details you can include.

These are just a few tips that can help you get started with writing a great personal statement. Remember, be yourself and write about what’s important to you — not what you think the college wants to read. IvyWise counselors Rachel and Zach share their top tips on how to brainstorm and write college application essays, and what admissions officers are looking for when they read them on the Just Admit It! college admissions podcast. Listen Now to learn how to brainstorm and write college essays and what admissions officers are looking for when they read them.

7-Step Fool-Proof Strategy on How to Write a Personal Statement

Step 1: brainstorm.

Brainstorming is a critical part of any writing process. You can never have too many ideas! If you haven’t decided which personal statement prompt to respond to yet, take the time to come up with at least three ideas for each of them.  Try these brainstorming tips to help you generate some creative ideas.  

Step 2: Shortlist Your Ideas

Since most personal statement prompts require you to write a short response, it’s best to focus on one idea. Now it’s time to narrow your list. Look at each idea you’ve written down. Is it a topic you’ve cared about for a long time? Is it a topic you’ll enjoy writing about? Is it a topic that allows you to showcase your unique perspective? If so, add this topic to your shortlist.

Step 3: Start Writing Down Your Thoughts

Now that you have a topic, it’s time to start writing! You aren’t going to get it right on the first draft, so just focus on getting the words down. Refer to the personal statement prompt as you write to ensure you don’t stray off topic, and don’t think about the word count just yet. You can polish and refine later to add or subtract words as needed. These tips can help you with your rough draft.

  • Don’t think about complex language before you write down what you want to say. Edit later. 
  • Write like you speak. Don’t use vocabulary you wouldn’t normally use or stuff your essay full of words you think will impress the admissions committee. That said, your essay should also be relatively free of grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors — though you aren’t expected to be perfect.  
  • Get personal. The admissions committee wants to get to know you, so don’t be afraid to write about your life in detail.  

Step 4: Take a Break and Read It Out Loud Later

Writing your personal statement can be challenging because you are invested emotionally. It’s important to take breaks to clear your head. In fact, walking boosts creativity , so taking short strolls can help if you’re feeling stuck. When you come back to your essay, read it out loud so you can get a feel for its flow and catch mistakes.   

Step 5: End It with a Bang

Ideally, you want your personal statement to make a lasting impression on the admission committee. A strong conclusion should connect to the beginning of your essay, reinforce your key points, and make the case for why you should be admitted.

Step 6: Edit

Now that you have a completed draft, it’s time to proofread and edit. Catch grammar and spelling mistakes in your personal statement by reading over it carefully. Make sure your essay is clear, flows well, responds to the prompt, and avoids repetition. Also edit for conciseness, especially if your draft exceeds the maximum word limit.  

Step 7: Ask for a Second Opinion and Rewrite if Needed

Asking someone you trust to read your personal statement is beneficial. Not only can they catch errors you missed, but they can also point out anything that’s unclear, distracting, or choppy. Ask someone who will give you honest feedback, especially if they have strong writing and/or editing skills. Rewrite or revise any sections that need work.    

Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Write Your Personal Statement

You may find it helpful to do some self-reflection before you start the process of writing your personal statement. Thinking about these questions can help you add more interesting and compelling details to your narrative.

  • Do you have a specific skill or quality that distinguishes you from others?
  • What hardships or challenges have you overcome, and what did you learn from them?
  • Is there something about you or your life story that is particularly distinctive?
  • When and how did you become interested in the academic discipline(s) you want to pursue?
  • What aspects of your personality will make you successful in your chosen field?
  • What have you learned through work, academics, or extracurricular activities that has helped you grow personally and professionally?
  • What are the most compelling reasons for the admissions committee to accept you?  

Examples of a Good Personal Statement

These examples of good personal statements come from IvyWise students. Each responds to a different personal statement prompt on the Common App and provides insights into themselves that wouldn’t appear elsewhere in their applications.  

Personal Statement Example 1

Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? (650 words max)

“What is utopia?” Dr. Cohen challenged my junior-year English class while we discussed Chang-Rae Lee’s dystopian novel On Such a Full Sea.

“A world without poverty and war!” “No discrimination or injustice!” “A four-day school week!”

As my classmates described their “perfect” worlds, I struggled for my own. In Qingdao, my home until I was eight, I’d been taught that the People’s Republic was the ideal society. Yet, the surveillance cameras in our classrooms defied a sense of freedom, and the songs we recited at assembly praising the Party felt mechanical and forced. When my family moved to California, I anticipated a freer, more just country, but disappointment followed. A sixth-grade classmate asked how I could see through my slanted eyes; our neighbors mimicked my mom for saying “sanks” instead of “thanks;” and last year, I encountered threats of censorship when I submitted a newspaper article about microaggressions against students of color.

As I sat in Dr. Cohen’s class mulling over these thoughts, I couldn’t hold back. I raised my hand. “Utopia doesn’t exist,” I stated firmly.

Sir Thomas More titled his paradisical satire from the Greek word ou-topos, which literally means “no place, nowhere,” and I was beginning to understand his irony: How could utopia exist in a world plagued by so much injustice and distrust? Because we humans are imperfect, I rationalized, no place inhabited by us could ever be perfect. In fact, all the authors we had explored in class–Atwood, Orwell, Ishiguro–affirmed this grim reality.

I am, by nature, an optimist, so for days after the utopia dilemma, I was bothered by my unexpected cynicism. Struggling to formulate a universal truth that would define the perfect world, I pored over utopian philosophies–those of Plato, St. Augustine, Owen. As I sought an answer, I found myself drawn to moments in my own life: cooking baozi with my grandmother, sharing sugar cookies with fellow newspaper staff during Saturday layouts, singing Adele’s hits with my mom driving home with fresh strawberries from the farmers’ market, and laughing hysterically with Kate and Ben while watching our mockumentary about Halloween. Though these moments weren’t documented in treatises, they were my utopias, my souvenirs of unblemished happiness.

But how could my everyday moments possibly approach the grand worlds posited by renowned philosophers? My utopias didn’t fit the model of the detached island that More had envisioned; my idylls depended upon close relationships and camaraderie, not solitude. Nor did my visions of ideal existence involve the propaganda and censorship upon which Plato’s Kallipolis was founded; my utopias rested on honesty, compassion, and companionship. Connection, I reasoned, is essential to utopia because our very nature is relational, a deep longing within each of us to seek the comfort of another.

I realized then that utopia isn’t one place or condition; it’s every small moment of engaging with others, of feeling known and letting others know they too are seen and understood. It’s not just gathering for celebration; it’s bolstering during injustice, sharing over grief, forgiving despite betrayal. It was marching with fellow Black Lives Matter protesters, mourning with my childhood playmates when our friend Kairan died, forgiving Anna for divulging my secret, and Anna’s forgiving me for divulging hers.

In class, I’d vehemently agreed with More that utopia existed nowhere. I recognize now that it can–it must–exist everywhere, especially in a challenging world where sometimes all we have is each other.

I’m still convinced there is no perfect world; I’m not sure it was even fair for me to expect one when I know that I myself am far from perfect. But my acceptance of human flaws, including my own, has not diminished my optimism. Instead, I’ve become even more determined to create for myself and others those special moments that give life meaning and purpose.

Why This Essay Works

This essay stands out because the student demonstrates their ability to think critically, question their own beliefs, and come to a new understanding about themselves. The student provides a window into their personality, and their experiences as an ethnic minority helps the admissions committee understand the diverse perspective this student can contribute to the campus community.

Personal Statement Example 2

Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you’ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design. (650 words max)

As a sailor, I revel in the piercing wind, the sound of my boat tearing through the water, and the periodic ice-cold splashes in my lap. But my head is always filled with questions. Why do we set the sail at certain angles? To find the answer, I went home and filled my beloved chalkboard with trigonometry and calculus, deriving that the sail’s optimal angle is half the bow’s angle to the wind. And how does a sailboat sail? Bernoulli’s principle in AP Physics answered that.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve learned best by asking questions and exchanging ideas. A simple question can lead my mind to go out for a stroll… and fall down a rabbit hole, like the one I found myself in during an elective on Nazi Germany. Every few sentences I read sparked a question to Google: What was the history of IG Farben? What obscure facts can I learn about Berchtesgaden? This happens with everything I read; when I need to move on to other work, I create a long list of questions to research later. Every answer sparks more questions and more articles saved in open tabs, running me up against the 500-tab limit on both web browsers on my phone. To paraphrase JFK: As my knowledge grows, my ignorance unfolds.

But seeking answers goes beyond gathering information. In Mock Trial, my moral and political views often lead me to quickly conclude which side is “right.” Building two opposing arguments, arguing passionately for both, and asking questions to poke holes in my own arguments allows me to understand different perspectives. I’ve learned that no issue is as clear-cut as it seems. For example, I always saw student debt as a matter of personal responsibility. Then a conversation with my English teacher while on a field trip made me waver. Hearing about the weight of her monthly payments and her struggles to make ends meet, I saw that the student debt crisis requires a societal response. She dedicated her life to teaching students like me, and I was benefitting from her burden. I now find myself interested in questions with purpose: How do issues like student debt impact people’s lives? What can be done about it?

Such questions about morality and effectiveness are at the heart of policy discussions. I’ve seen how policy questions affect real people, whether I’m talking to voters about the Cincinnati streetcar while working on a local campaign, writing about the national abortion debate, or advocating for STEM education funding on Capitol Hill. How should Cincinnati spend its transportation budget? What is the best way to bring robotics programs to disadvantaged communities? Asking such questions and hearing different perspectives is critical to crafting effective policies.

To inform my opinions on difficult questions, I absorb viewpoints from opposing sources and debate (often vigorously!) with my friends and family. I scrutinize problems with arguments in publications that align with my beliefs and carefully consider good points by authors I typically disagree with. I dive past the political zealotry tied to Supreme Court rulings, reading law review articles and referencing my course notes from Justice , where I read Kant, Mills, and Rawls. Using these resources, I examined the legal and moral questions around the 2021 case Cedar Point Nursery v. Hassid , writing an article weighing employers’ property rights and unions’ rights to organize workers. But not all questions are weighty: I love bickering with my best friend about whether Shakespeare was better than Marlowe (he was) or arguing with her over which Star Wars movie is best (clearly, The Force Awakens , not The Empire Strikes Back ).

Asking questions forces me to think, leading toa deeper understanding. While some questions are trivial, the answers are always interesting. More importantly, the answers to some questions can meaningfully impact people’s lives. This is what motivates me to keep learning, keep debating, and keep questioning.

This essay demonstrates the student’s critical thinking skills and what motivates them to learn both in and out of the classroom. The main idea flows seamlessly throughout the essay, from topics that pique the student’s interest in class to social and political issues and activities that inspire them to question, debate, and understand. It gives the admission committee a good idea of how this student will contribute to the class and the wider campus community.

How Ivywise Can Help You with Your Personal Statement

At IvyWise, our team of former admissions officers works with students to help them brainstorm and identify compelling personal statement topics, provide feedback on essay drafts, and more. Our college counseling services and strategic admissions support can help you stand out in all aspects of your application.

Just looking for help with your personal statement? We offer customizable programs to fit your specific needs, goals, and budget, including smaller programs focusing on your college essay.  Contact us today for information on our counseling services.

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Last updated March 5, 2024

Every piece we write is researched and vetted by a former admissions officer. Read about our mission to pull back the admissions curtain.

Blog > Common App , Essay Examples , Personal Statement > 15 Amazing Personal Statement Examples (2024 Update)

15 Amazing Personal Statement Examples (2024 Update)

Admissions officer reviewed by Ben Bousquet, M.Ed Former Vanderbilt University

Written by Kylie Kistner, MA Former Willamette University Admissions

Key Takeaway

What’s that old saying? “The best way to learn is by doing.” Well, we believe that, in personal statements and in life, cliches like this should be avoided. For some people, the best way to start writing a personal statement is indeed just to start.

But for most writers, jumping right into the writing process is a daunting task. If you’ve never written a personal statement before, then how do you know where to begin?

That’s where example essays come in. There are millions of opinions in the college admissions world about whether or not students should read example essays. But here’s ours:

You absolutely should be reading example personal statements.

Let’s get into it.

Why you should read example personal statements

Reading example personal statements helps you understand why they work (or don’t work) in the admissions process.

Now, the point of reading them isn’t to copy them. It’s not even necessarily to be inspired by them.

Instead, the point of reading examples is to know what personal statements look like. Think about it: if you’d never seen a children’s book before, would you know how to write one? Probably not! Same goes for personal statements.

In this post, we show you some exceptional, solid, and need-to-be-improved personal statements.

And to help you understand how these essays function as personal statements, we’ve also gotten our team of former admissions officers to grade and provide feedback on each.

What does an admissions officer look for in a personal statement?

Before we get to the essays, let’s briefly walk through what goes through an admissions officer’s head when they open an application.

Admissions officers (AOs) read hundreds to thousands of applications in a single year. Different institutions require admissions officers to use different criteria when evaluating applications, so the specifics will vary by school. Your entire application should cohere to form a seamless narrative . You'll be crafting that narrative across the following categories:

  • Transcripts and course rigor : AOs look at the classes you’ve taken to assess how much you’ve challenged yourself based on the classes your school offers. They’re also looking at how well you've done in these classes each term.
  • Extracurricular activities : When reading through your activities list, AOs look at the activities you’ve done, how many years you’ve participated in them, and how many hours a week you devote to them. They’re assessing your activities for the levels of magnitude, impact, and reach that they demonstrate. (Want to know more about these terms? Check out our extracurricular impact post .)
  • Background information : This background information briefly tells admissions officers about demographic and family information, your school context, and any honors or awards you’ve received.
  • Letters of recommendation : Letters of recommendation give AOs insight into who you are in the classroom.
  • Essays : And, finally, the essays. Whether you’re writing a personal statement or a supplemental essay , essays are the main place AOs get to hear your voice and learn more about you. Your personal statement in particular is the place where you get to lay out your overall application narrative and say something meaningful about your personal strengths.

So, with all that in mind, what does an admissions officer actually look for when reading your personal statement?

A few traits tend to surface across the best personal statements, no matter the topic or format. There are four primary areas you should focus on as you craft your personal statement.

  • Strengths : AOs want to know about your strengths. That doesn’t mean bragging about your accomplishments, but it does mean writing about a topic that lets you showcase something positive about yourself.
  • Personal meaning : Personal statements shouldn’t be fluff. They shouldn’t be history essays. They should be personal essays that ooze meaning. The topic you choose should show something significant about yourself that the admissions officers won’t get from any other part of your application.
  • Authenticity and vulnerability : These characteristics can be the most difficult to achieve. Being “vulnerable” doesn’t mean airing all your dirty laundry. It means revealing something authentic and meaningful about who you are. To be vulnerable means to go beyond the surface level to put yourself out there, even to admissions officers who you’ve never met.
  • Clear organization and writing : And lastly, admissions officers also want your essay to be organized clearly so it’s easy to follow along. Remember that admissions officers are reading lots of applications, even in one sitting. So you want to make your reader’s job as easy as possible. Thoughtful and skillful writing can also help take your personal statement to the next level.

If you want to know more about how to incorporate these traits into your own essay, we have a whole guide about how to write the perfect personal statement .

But for now, let’s get into the examples.

We’ve broken up the example personal statements into three categories: best personal statement examples, good personal statement examples, and “bad” personal statement examples. These categories show you that there is a spectrum of what personal statements can look like. The best examples are the gold standard. They meet or exceed all four of the main criteria admissions officers are looking for. The good examples are just that: good. They’re solid examples that may be lacking in a specific area but are still effective personal statements. The “bad” examples are those that don’t yet stack up to the expectations of a personal statement. They’re not objectively bad, but they need some specific improvements to align with what admissions officers are looking for.

Here we go!

The Best Personal Statement Examples

Writing an exceptional personal statement takes a lot of time and effort. Even the best writers can find the genre challenging. But when you strike the perfect chord and get it right, it’s almost like magic. Your essay jumps off the page and captures an admissions officer’s attention. They feel like you’re right there with them, telling them everything they need to know to vote “yes” on your admission.

The following essays are some of our favorites. They cover a range of topics, styles, and student backgrounds. But they all tell meaningful stories about the writers’ lives. They are well-organized, use vivid language, and speak to the writers’ strengths.

For each essay, our team of former admissions officers have offered comments about what makes the essay exceptional. Take a look through the annotations and feedback to see what lessons you can apply to your own personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #1: Thankful

My family has always been broke. Saturday mornings and Thursday evenings, always the same drill: the kids (my brothers and me) would be loaded in the car with my parents and off we’d all go to the food pantry. New clothes were few and far between, and going on vacation was something that we could only dream of. Despite our financial struggles, one year, my parents decided to surprise us with a trip to Disney Land. It was a complete shock to me and my siblings. We were over the moon. In fact, the screams of excitement that emanated from my younger brother’s mouth still ring in my ears.

But as the trip drew close, my excitement tempered and I began to worry. Being poor when you’re young doesn’t just affect you materially. It also affects how you see the world and loads you up with a whole range of anxieties that, in an ideal world, no child should have to face. How were my parents going to afford this, I wondered? Would an expense like this push us over the brink?(( The beginning of this essay, and especially this sentence, show the writer’s empathy. They are not selfish; they understand their broader family context and take that into consideration.)) I didn't want to ruin the surprise by asking, but I couldn't shake the feeling of dread building inside of me.

The day of our trip arrived and we set off for the airport. In the car, my dad made an off-the-cuff comment about a new video game that he’d wanted to play but didn’t buy, and everything clicked—my parents had made the trip possible by saving for months, cutting back on expenses and sacrificing their own comforts to make the trip happen.

As we boarded the plane, I was filled with a mix of emotions. I was grateful beyond words for my parents' sacrifice, but I was also overwhelmed by the guilt of knowing that they had given up so much for us. I didn't know how to express my gratitude; when we deplaned in LAX, I gave my mom and dad a rib-crushing hug.

The trip itself was everything that I had dreamed of and more. We spent four magical days at Disney Land(( Nice use of vivid details here. The reader can picture the sights and smells of Disney—and the ensuing hunger when passing a churro stand.)) , speed running the roller coasters and campy boat rides from the 70s. Sure, we packed our own food and walked right by the churro stands with a hungry look in our eyes. But I will never forget the feeling of unmitigated joy that my family shared on that trip, the smiles that painted my parents’ faces.

But the trip itself was nothing compared to the gratitude I felt for my parents(( Here, the writer transitions to reintroducing the theme of gratitude.)) . They had given us the gift of a lifetime, and I knew that I would never be able to repay them for their sacrifice.

In the years since that trip, I have carried that feeling of gratitude with me. It has motivated me to work hard and to always strive to be the best person that I can be. I want to make my parents proud and to show them that their sacrifice was worth it(( Finally, the writer sums things up with an eye to the future. It’s helpful for an admission officer to picture what the essay’s lessons might mean for the student as a future community member.)) .

I will never be able to fully express my gratitude for what my parents did for us, but I will always remember their selflessness and their willingness to put their own needs aside for the sake of our happiness. It was a truly surprising and incredible act of love, and one that I will always be thankful for.

AO Notes on Thankful

This essay accomplishes a few things even though it essentially tells one story and offers a quick reflection. It gives some important context regarding the challenges of being from a lower-income family. It does that in a way that is authentic, rather than problem-focused. It also shows that the writer is empathetic, family-oriented, and reflective.

Why this essay stands out:

  • Vulnerability : This essay is upfront about a challenging topic: financial insecurity. While you don’t have to tell your most difficult challenge in an essay, this writer chose to write about a circumstance that gives additional context that may be helpful as admissions considers their application.
  • Personal : The writer gets into some family dynamics and paints a picture of how their family treats and takes care of each other.
  • Values: We clearly see some values the writer has and that they don’t take their parents’ sacrifices for granted. As an admission officer, I can picture this student using their education to give back—to their family or to others.

Personal Statement Example #2: Pickleball

I’ve always been one to have a good attitude no matter the circumstances. Except when it comes to exercise. From dodgeball in PE class to family Turkey Trots, I’m always the first one out and the last one across the finish line. These realities aren’t from a lack of skill—I’m actually quite coordinated and fast. They are from a lack of effort(( This is a quick hit of… either humor or vulnerability. I chuckled at the blunt honesty, and am intrigued to learn more.)) . Despite my best intentions, I can never get myself to care about sports or competitions. So when my dad first asked me to be his pickleball partner last summer, I did nothing but laugh.

But soon, I realized that he was serious. My dad started playing pickleball two years ago as a fun way to exercise. He’d become a star in our city’s recreation league, and I always enjoyed cheering him on from the sidelines. When his doubles partner got relocated for work, my dad decided that the disruption was a good opportunity for us bond through pickleball. Even though I was mortified by the thought of running back and forth to hit a bouncing ball, I reluctantly agreed.

The next Saturday morning, we went to the court for our first practice. I was wearing sweatpants, an old sweatshirt, and a grimace. My dad showed me how to hold the paddle, serve, and return the ball to our opponents. He told me about staying out of the kitchen—an endearing pickleball term that references the “kitchen,” or the middle part of the court—trying to make me laugh. Instead, I sighed impatiently and walked to my end of the court, ready to get it over with.

My dad remained patient in spite of my bad attitude. He gently served me the ball, and I gave a lackluster attempt to return it. The ball bounced into the net. I hadn’t even made it to his side of the court. Trying his best to encourage me, my dad gave me the ball so I could serve it to him instead. I tossed the ball up and hit it underhand toward my dad. It hit the net again. I tried again and again, each attempt with less care than the last. I grew frustrated and threw my paddle down in anger(( Okay, this paragraph gives a good dose of openness to the emotions of the writer. They’ve served up an opportunity to learn a lesson soon…)) .

After seeing my mini-meltdown, my dad crossed the kitchen to talk to me. During our conversation, I began to ask myself why I got so frustrated when I wasn’t trying very hard in the first place. I thought pickleball was a miserable sport, but I realized that it wasn’t pickleball that I cared about. I cared about my dad. I wanted to make him proud(( Ah, and there it is! A realization. As the admission officer I’m thinking, “Go on…”)) . Playing pickleball with him was the least I could do to thank him for everything he’d done for me. I dusted off my bad attitude alongside my paddle, and I got up to try another serve.

That serve hit the net again. But more determined now, I kept trying until my serves went over the net and through my dad’s weak side. I couldn’t believe it. My attitude adjustment helped me see the game for what it was: a game. It wasn’t supposed to be agonizing or cruel. It was supposed to be fun.

I learned that my attitude towards sports was unacceptable. This experience taught me that it’s okay to have preferences about what you enjoy, but it’s important to always maintain a positive attitude(( And the lesson learned! )) . You may just enjoy it after all.

Now my dad and I are both stars in our recreation league. Soon, we will make our way to our league’s semi-finals. We’ve worked our way through the bracket and are close to the championship. What I appreciate more about this experience, however, is how close it’s brought my dad and I together. His patience, positivity, and persistence have and will always inspire me. I want to be more like him every day, especially on the pickleball court.

AO Notes on Pickleball

This is a strong “attitude adjustment” essay, a bit of a remix of a challenge essay. The challenge, in this case, was a fixed mindset about sports that needed to be adjusted. The writer takes us on a witty journey through their own attitude towards organized athletic activities and their father.

  • Self-aware : Similar to the vulnerability of other essays, this writer is willing to criticize themselves by recognizing that they need an attitude adjustment. Even before they changed their attitude, we get the sense that they are at least aware of their own lack of effort.
  • Strong conclusion : We see a nice lesson at the end that relates both to having an open mind and caring for others. They even make a point about simply enjoying things because they are fun.
  • Life lesson : Beyond the stated lesson, as an admission officer with a few more years on this Earth than the writer, I can tell this lesson will apply beyond sports. In fact, I can easily picture this student trying a new class, club, or group of friends in college because they are now more open to novel experiences.

Personal Statement Example #3: The Bird Watcher

I’m an avid walker and bird watcher(( Okay, the writer gets right into it! I think this simple introduction of the topic works well because they are writing about a less common hobby among teenagers. If they had said “I am an avid baseball player”, I would have been less eager to learn more.)) . Growing up, I’d clear my head by walking along the trail in the woods behind my house. By the time I was immersed in the chaos of high school, these walks became an afternoon routine. Now, every day at three o’clock, I don my jacket and hiking shoes and set off. As I walk, I note the flora and fauna around me. The wind whispering through the trees, the quiet rustling of a chipmunk underfoot, and the high-pitched call of robins perched atop branches, all of it brings me back to life after a difficult day.

And recently, the days have been more difficult than not. My grandparents passing, parents divorcing, and doctor diagnosing me with ADHD have presented me with more challenges than I’ve ever experienced before. But no matter what’s going on in my life, the wildlife on my walks brings me peace. As an aspiring ornithologist, the birds are my favorite(( This paragraph accomplishes a lot: a montage of difficult circumstances, context for their application, and declares their future career.)) .

I became interested in ornithology during long childhood afternoons spent at my grandparents’ house. They would watch me while my parents finished up work. I’d listen to the old bird clock that hung on the wall in the kitchen. Each number on the clock corresponded with a different bird. Every hour, the clock would chirp rather than chime. When the cardinal sang, I knew my parents would be arriving soon. Those chirps are all seared into my memory.

Twelve o’clock: robin. The short, fast, almost laugh-like sound of the robin always makes me hungry. All those Saturday afternoons filled with laughter and good food have resulted in a Pavlovian response. I’d cook meatballs with my grandma, splashing sauce on her floral wall paper. We’d laugh and laugh and enjoy the meal together at her plastic-covered kitchen table. This wasn’t my home, but I felt at home just the same.

Three o’clock: blue jay. It’d chime as soon as we walked in the door after school. The blue jay was my grandpa’s favorite. It was also mine. Why he loved it, I’m not completely sure. But it was my favorite because it marked the beginning of the best parts of my day. Symbolizing strength and confidence, blue jays always remind me of my grandpa.

Six o’clock: cardinal. The sharp whistle and staccato of the cardinal indicated that it was almost time for me to leave. Like the whistle of a closing shift, I’d hear it and start to pack my things. The cardinal has always been my least favorite.

Nine o’clock: house finch. The high, sweet, almost inquisitive call of the house finch was the one my grandma loved most. It was also the one I rarely heard. Either too early or too late in the day, the house finch was reserved for the occasional weekends when I’d spend the night at their house. My grandma would explain that finches symbolize harmony and peace. They are petite but mighty, just like she was(( This is a clever and sweet way of describing summer days with grandparents, while sprinkling in some vivid details to bring the story to life.)) .

This past weekend was the anniversary of my grandpa’s passing. Longing for my grandparents, I went for a walk. Winter is approaching, so the sky was darkening quickly. I walked slowly. As the sun set, I heard the tell-tale squawk of a blue jay, loud and piercing through the chill of the wind. I looked around and saw it sitting on an old stump, a small house finch behind it. I extracted my binoculars from my backpack, hoping to get a better glimpse through the dark. I turned the dial to focus the lenses, just as the birds flew away together. I took a deep breath, binoculars in hand, and continued on, spotting a robin in the distance(( The ending stylistically wraps the essay up without tying a bow on it. It’s a more artful way of concluding, and it works well here.)) .

AO Notes on Birdwatcher

This first two paragraphs are well-written and fairly to-the-point in their language. They do a nice job of setting the scene, but the third paragraph transitions into the writer’s distinctive voice. They detail the birds on the clock to chronicle the hours of their summer days and end, not without concluding, but leaving the reader wanting to read more of their stories.

  • Voice: The writer transitions to writing in their own distinct voice, which comes to a crescendo in the final paragraph.
  • Interesting approach: Sometimes students use an approach to tell a story that feels overly forced or cliche. This one feels organic and relates nicely to the writer, their family, and the story as a whole.
  • Career path : This is far from a “What I want to be when I grow up” essay, but it clearly shows an academic interest grounded in family and childhood memories. This is an artistic and beautiful approach to showing admissions how the writer may use their college education.

Personal Statement Example #4: Chekov’s Wig

At the age of six, I starred in an at-home, one-woman production of Annie. My family watched as I switched between a wig I’d fashioned from maroon yarn, a dog’s tail leftover from Halloween, and a tie I’d stolen from my dad.

When the reveal came that Annie’s parents had actually passed away, I took a creative liberty: they had left Annie a small unicorn farm. The rest of the play proceeded as normal. When the curtain closed, I bowed to the sound of my family’s applause. But one set of hands was missing: my grandmother’s. Instead she sat, arms raised, and jokingly exclaimed, “But what about the unicorns?”(( Wow, an interesting intro! We see creativity and a silly side to the writer. As the admission officer, I’m eager to see where this leads.))

My grandma, an avid thespian, taught me a lot about life. But one of the most important lessons followed this production of Annie . After we laughed about her remark, she introduced me to the concept of Chekov’s gun. For Anton Chekov, brilliant playwright, the theory goes something like this: a writer shouldn’t write about a loaded gun if it’s not going to be fired. In other words, writers shouldn’t include details about something if it won’t serve a purpose in the story later. My unicorn farm had committed this writing faux pas egregiously.

I’m not a natural writer, and I have no goal to become one, but I’ve taken this concept of Chekov’s gun to heart—it forms the foundation of my life philosophy. I don’t believe that everything was meant to be(( This philosophical reflection is a nice introduction to the paragraphs that follow. )) . In fact, I think that sometimes bad things just happen. But I believe that these details will always play a part in our larger story.

The first test of my Chekov’s gun philosophy occurred shortly after Annie when my grandma, my biggest supporter, passed away. My family tried to console me saying that “it was her time to go,” but I disagreed. I couldn’t see how a death could be destined. Instead, I found comfort knowing that her presence, her support, and her death wasn’t for nothing. Like Chekov’s gun, I wasn’t quite sure how or why, but I knew that she would return for me.

As I grew older, my philosophy was tested time and again. Most recently, I fell back on Chekov’s gun as I coped with my parents’ divorce and my subsequent move to a new town. Both events shattered my world. My happy family theatre productions turned into custody hearings and overnight bags. The community I’d found at my old school became a sea of unfamiliar faces at my new one. None of this was meant to be. But as the writer of my own life, I won’t let the details become inconsequential.

I’ve used these events as plot points in my high school experience. Dealing with my parents’ divorce has taught me how to make the best of what’s given to me. I got the chance to decorate two bedrooms, live in both the suburbs and the city, and even have twice the amount of pets. And without the inciting incident of the divorce and move(( We see that the writer is able to make lemonade out of lemons here.)) , I never would have joined a new drama club or landed leading roles in Mama Mia and Twelfth Night. The divorce and move, like Chekov’s gun, have been crucial details in getting me where I’m at today.

I know that Chekov’s gun is more about the details in a story, but this philosophy empowers me to take what happens, the good and the bad, as part of my personal character development. Nothing would be happening if it weren’t important.

This summer, as we cleaned our garage in preparation for yet another move, I found my old Annie wig, yarn tangled from the box. Next to the wig was a note, handwritten in a script I’d recognize anywhere. My darling star, it read. You are going to go on to do great things. Love, Grandma ((And a sweet, or bittersweet, conclusion.)) .

AO Notes on Chekov’s Wig

This essay tells a beautiful story about a foundational philosophy in this young writer’s life. As their admission officer, I can see how grounded and positive they are. I can also imagine them taking this lesson to college: really paying attention to life, reflecting on the past, and understanding the value of even the smallest instances. There is an inherent maturity in this essay.

  • Creativity: From the first few sentences, we can see that this student is now, and was as a child, creative. An original thinker.
  • Reflective: When challenged by their grandmother, the writer didn’t insist that their way was correct. They took the criticism in stride and absorbed it as a salient life lesson. This shows open-mindedness and an uncommon level of maturity.
  • Silver linings: It’s clear that this young writer has had some familial challenges that are likely familiar to some of you. They don’t gloss over them, but instead they learn from them. From having more pets to starring in the school musicals, there are lessons to glean from even life’s more difficult challenges.

Personal Statement Example #5: An Afternoon with Grandmother

The Buddhist temple on the hillside above my home has always possessed a deep power for me. With its towering spires and intricate carvings thousands of years old, it is a place of peace and serenity(( This writer opens with some wonderful imagery. I like how the imagery mirrors the meaning.)) —somewhere I can go to escape the chaos of the world and connect with myself and with my sense of spirituality. When my grandmother called me one January to let me know that she would be coming to visit, I smiled, my mind darting immediately to the temple and to the visit of it we would take together.

My relationship with my grandmother is a special one. After my parents passed away, she and my grandfather raised me for three years before I moved in with my father’s sister. In that time, she was my sole companion; she shared her recipes with me, told me stories, and most importantly, she taught me everything I know about spirituality. We spent countless nights staying up past bed-time, talking about the teachings of the Buddha, and she encouraged me gently to explore my own path to enlightenment(( This topic is accomplishing a lot: we see the writer’s relationship with their grandmother, their personal values, and their ideas about who they want to be in the future.)) .

When my grandmother finally arrived, I felt bathed in a warm glow. After catching up and preparing her favorite meal—red rice with miso soup and hot green tea—I told her about the plans I had for us to visit my special place.

Later that afternoon, as we entered the temple, I felt the calmness and tranquility wash over me. I took my grandmother's hand and led her to the main hall, where we knelt before the altar and began to recite the prayers and mantras that I had learned from her years before.

As we prayed, our voices joined together, echoing throughout the temple. A gentle rain began to fall outside and, as the cold crept around where we knelt, I was engulfed by a deep sense of connection with my grandmother and with the universe. It was as if the barriers between us were falling away, and we were becoming one—with each other, and with our shared connection to the divine.

We finished our prayers and sat in silence, lingering in the serenity of the temple. I could feel my grandmother's hand in mine, and I was filled with a sense of gratitude and love(( A great example of weaving vivid language with explicit reflection!)) .

Spirituality has been essential in my life. It gives me a sense of grounding and purpose, and it teaches me the value of compassion. My spirituality has also given me a way to connect with my grandmother on a deeper level—like a private language that only we speak together. In a world that can often feel chaotic and disconnected, faith and spirituality provide a sense of stability and connection.

As we left the temple, I held my grandmother's hand and felt suffused by a sense of peace and contentment. Too often people who are disconnected from spirituality misunderstand the role it plays in billions of people’s lives. They see it as a way to “check out” from the issues the world faces, ignoring their responsibilities to others. This may be true for others, but not me. Quite the opposite. My spirituality helps me empathize with others(( Wonderful reflection.)) ; it helps me focus on the obligations we each have to every other person and creature on this planet. For me, it is the ultimate way to “check in” to the needs of the world and my community in a way that grounds me emotionally.

Spirituality offers a way to find meaning and purpose in life, and to connect with something greater than ourselves. For that, and for my grandmother, I am truly grateful.

AO Notes on An Afternoon with Grandmother

In this deeply reflective essay, the writer uses spirituality and their relationship with their grandmother to reveal a very personal part of themselves. The writer isn’t afraid to be vulnerable, and they clearly showcase strengths of wisdom and compassion.

  • Vivid language: This author is a talented writer who has included a bunch of vivid language. But it’s not over the top. They include just enough to hold a reader’s attention and add some interest.
  • Reflection: The reflection throughout this essay is excellent. Notice how it’s not just at the beginning or the end. It’s woven throughout. The writer follows up each major detail with an explanation of why it’s personally meaningful.
  • Conclusion: The conclusion combines vivid language and reflection perfectly. By the end of the essay, we know exactly what the writer wants us to take away: spirituality is personally meaningful to them because it helps them connect with the people around them. And I especially like how the writer chose to end on a note of gratitude—always a good value to have in a personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #6: Rosie’s

While most people find their lowest point at rock bottom, I found mine in an Amerikooler DW081677F-8(( We’re definitely off to an odd start. I’m curious where this is headed!)) . With drops rolling down my back and my cheeks, I snuck into the walk-in freezer for a moment of chill.

At that point, I had worked at Rosie's for nearly a year. The job was a good one: it fit with my school schedule, paid well, and introduced me to close friends. But as a workplace, Rosie’s was pure chaos. The original owners passed on a host of problems the new owners were working hard to fix. But the problems ran deep. From an inefficient kitchen organization to a malfunctioning scheduling software, we never knew what to do or when.

The day I found myself in the Amerikooler was the day everything caught up with us(( This is a good transitional phrase that helps readers navigate this fairly complex narrative.)) . An error in our scheduling software led to us operating with only 30% of our typical team. As the only waitress on duty, I ran between the kitchen and the guests, stopping mid-delivery to put new vegetables in the steamers. The kitchen staff were barely getting through each dish before customers lost patience.

Then, in all the commotion, I dropped a plate of macaroni and cheese all over a customer. I apologized over and over again. I was embarrassed and ashamed. I couldn’t believe what I had done. I always tried to be one step ahead to give my customers the best service, so my mistake felt like an utter failure. After helping them clean up, I ran immediately to the freezer. I realized that something had to change.

In the Amerikooler, a pea and corn mix cool on my back, I considered my options. The easiest option was to quit. I could find another job, one that didn’t cause me so much stress. But quitting wouldn’t just mean giving up. It would mean accepting my failure. It would also mean abandoning the coworkers I had grown close to. Leaving them would only burden them more. While I knew it wasn’t my job to fix the restaurant, I knew that leaving wasn’t the answer either. Instead, I decided to focus on solutions(( I like the focus on solutions and action steps here!)) . I stood up from the cold, dirty freezer floor, dusted off my work pants, washed my hands, and got back to work.

Despite being the newest and youngest member of the Rosie’s staff, I recognized that I brought a new perspective to the workplace. Having spent the previous three summers scheduling volunteers for my local food drive, I used my organizing experience to devise a new scheduling system, one that didn’t rely on our outdated technology. I brought up the system at our weekly meeting, and after initial pushback, everyone agreed to give it a try. Three months later, my system keeps everyone happy and our kitchen and floor staffed.

But it wasn’t just the staffing problem that was the issue. Our workflows were inefficient, and we didn’t know how to communicate or collaborate effectively. I know that identifying an issue is always the first step to a solution, so I raised the question at our most recent staff meeting. Having earned my coworkers’ and bosses’ trust(( And here we see some good growth and leadership.)) , I led us in outlining a few new processes to streamline our productivity. In stark contrast to the failure I felt after spilling the macaroni and cheese, developing a new workflow with my coworkers made me proud. I hadn’t given in to the chaos, but I had worked thoughtfully and collaboratively to create new solutions.

I’m sure that won’t be my last time working in a disorganized environment or spilling macaroni and cheese. But I know that I’ll be ready to address whatever comes my way.

AO Notes on Rosie’s

If you’ve ever worked in a food establishment, then something in this essay will probably resonate with you. But I appreciate how the writer doesn’t get pulled into the negativity they experience. Instead, they focused their efforts (and their essay) on how they could make things better for everyone. That’s the kind of student admissions officers want to see on their campuses.

  • Organization: The writer has to narrate and backtrack a bit at the beginning of the essay to make the introduction work. But it’s not confusing for a reader because they have very solid transitions. I also like how the action steps and reflection are organized in the narrative.
  • Positive outlook: As an admissions officer, I would admire this student for their problem-solving skills. Working in that environment was surely tough, but they didn’t give up. They got to work and helped everyone out in the process.
  • Humor: From the introduction to the conclusion, the writer incorporates subtle humor throughout. Because of it, we actually feel like we know the writer by the conclusion. Too much humor can overwhelm a personal essay, but just enough can help readers see who the writer really is.

Personal Statement Example #7: Gone Fishing

I pulled the line with my left hand and snapped the rod back with my right. The line split through the air above me like a knife through cake. I rigidly waved my right arm up and down to dry off my fly, which had started sinking from the weight of the water. Ready to cast, I loosened the grip on my left hand to release a few more feet of line, pulled my right arm back in a grandiose motion, and hammered it back down. I expected my line to fly out in front of me, gracefully floating back onto the surface of the water. Instead, I was met with a startling resistance. My fly had lodged itself into the bush behind me(( This opening paragraph has great vivid description. Here, we end on a moment of suspense that has left me intrigued about what will happen next.)) .

Annoyed, I waded through the tall, thick grass, rod under my arm and mosquitoes buzzing in my ears. This was the reality of fly fishing. In my short time as a fisherman, I’d caught far more trees, bushes, and riverweed than I had fish. What seems so elegant in movies like A River Runs Through It is actually a grueling process of trial and error. I took up flyfishing a year ago to conquer my fear of the outdoors(( Ah ha—we learn that this essay isn’t really about fly fishing. It’s about conquering a fear. And with that, we see that the stakes are high.)) . I could have (and probably should have) chosen a more mild activity like hiking or kayaking, but I’ve always been one to take on a challenge.

I had been afraid of the outdoors since childhood. Coming from a family that prefers libraries to parks and bed and breakfasts to tents, I never learned how to appreciate nature. I limited my time outside as much as I could. I feared the bugs, the sun, and the unknown.

I decided to try flyfishing when I realized I didn’t want to be controlled by my fear any longer(( As an AO, I would applaud this student’s bravery.)) . All the birthday parties I’d turned down, the memories that were made without me, I had missed out on so much. Being outside was an integral part of the human experience—or, at least, that’s what I’d been told. Without being willing to enjoy nature, I was missing out on what it meant to be myself.

Soon after this realization, I found an old rod in my grandpa’s garage and took it as a sign from the universe. On my first time out, my Honda Civic lurched over a ditch on the gravel road Google Maps had directed me to. I’d spent hours watching YouTube videos of proper technique. Stepping out of my car, I felt my skin crack under the dry heat, and I wanted to leave. But I continued on, walking through branches and over logs to the riverbank. I was doing it( More vivid detail that really gives us a sense of the writer’s discomfort—yet they’re persisting.)) .

I pushed myself to continue, no matter how uncomfortable I got. I went back, Saturday after Saturday, each time noticing improvements in my abilities. Along the way, I learned to push myself to do things that make me uncomfortable. I saw myself in a new light. I wasn’t Charlie, afraid of the outdoors. I was Charlie, fisherman.

The first time I caught a fish, I could hardly believe it. Thinking I had caught another piece of riverweed, I tugged on my line and rolled my eyes. But suddenly, it started tugging back. It was a sensation I’d never experienced before, one of haste, pride, and panic. I instantly collected myself, bracing against the bank as I secured the line with my finger and slowly pulled the fish ashore. Delicately removing my hook from its mouth, I admired its beauty. Whereas I had once feared creatures like this trout, I now respected it. Its holographic scales glistened in the sunlight. I thanked it for helping me grow, and I placed it back in the water. It swam away. I wiped the slime off my hands and picked up my rod, left hand tugging at the line, right hand snapping back again((This conclusion is quite long, but I really like this poetic ending. It shows so much growth, and there’s a subtle nod to the fact that the writer is continuing to fish.)) .

AO Notes on Gone Fishing

From all this imagery, I really felt like I was fishing alongside them. What’s better, I feel like I really get where this student is coming from because of their vulnerability. They show immense growth and open-mindedness, which is exactly what admissions officers are looking for.

  • Imagery: This writer definitely likes creative writing. From the introduction, we can envision ourselves going on this journey with the writer. There is some excellent “show, don’t tell” here.
  • Deep personal meaning: Biggest fears are hard to overcome, especially with such a good attitude. It’s clear that this topic is a meaningful one to the writer. Even the act of fly fishing, which they didn’t seem to like much at first, becomes a meaningful act.
  • Narrative arc: We have a classic “going on a journey” essay, where the writer transforms on a journey from point A (being afraid of the outdoors) to point B (catching a fish). The writer’s implementation of this structure is excellent, which makes the essay easy to follow.

Good Personal Statement Examples

Even if your essay isn’t worthy of The New Yorker , you can still make your mark on admissions officers. Writing an essay that fulfills all the goals of a personal statement, whether or not it meets every single criterion an admissions officer is looking for, can still get you into a great college.

Most personal statements are good personal statements, so don’t worry if you’re feeling overwhelmed by the amazing essay examples you see online. The key to writing a good personal statement is writing your personal statement. Focus on finding a topic that lets you communicate your own meaning and voice, and you’ll be set.

The following examples are awesome personal statements. There may be a little room for improvement in places, but the essays do exactly what they need to do. And they say a lot about their writers. Let’s see what the writers and admissions officers have to say.

Personal Statement Example #8: Beekeeper’s Club

As I lift the heavy lid of the hive, the hum of thousands of bees fills my ears. I carefully smoke the entrance to calm the bees, and I begin to inspect the frames. The bees are busy at work, collecting nectar and pollen, and tending to their young. I am in awe of their organization.

I never would have thought that I, a high school student, would become a beekeeper(( An interesting hobby for a high school student! I’m intrigued to see where this is going.)) . But now it’s something I can’t imagine my life without.

It all started when I found a beekeeping suit at a garage sale two summers ago. At a mere five dollars, it was yellowing and musty, but it appeared to be fully intact and without any holes. I’ve lived many lives as a hobbyist, always willing to try new things. I’ve been a sailor, a gardener, a basketball player, a harpist, a rock climber, and more. The problem is that I can never manage to see these hobbies through(( I see. Here we get a sense of what’s at stake in this new venture. The problem is that writer can’t seem to hold down a hobby. Will beekeeping solve that problem? Let’s find out .)) . As a perpetual novice, I always lose interest or become overwhelmed by all the information. But that’s never stopped me from taking up a new hobby, so I brought the beekeeping suit to the make-shift register and handed the seller a five-dollar bill.

To embark on my new hobby, I first went to the library and read everything I could find about beekeeping. Research is always my first step when starting something new. I like to know what I’m in for. As I read, I became fascinated by the fact that such small creatures can serve such a critical role on our planet. I learned about the importance of bees for pollinating crops, and I read that their populations have been declining in recent years. I was determined to do my part to help. This wasn’t just a hobby anymore— it was a mission(( And the stakes just got higher.)) .

But like the bees I’d been reading about, I knew I couldn't do it alone. My years of abandoning hobbies had taught me that this time, I needed guidance from someone with experience. I knew the first place to look. At the farmer’s market that Saturday, I went straight to the honey stand and introduced myself. The vendor’s name was Jeremy, and he was excited to see someone so young taking up beekeeping. I asked if I could come see his hives sometime, and he agreed.

I showed up the next weekend with my used beekeeping suit in hand. Jeremy gave me a tour. I was astounded by the simultaneous simplicity and complexity. As the months went by, Jeremy became my mentor. He taught me the importance of monitoring the health of the hive, how to properly harvest honey, and even the ins and outs of the farmer’s market business.

I was grateful for his guidance and friendship. I found myself becoming more and more passionate about bees and the art of beekeeping.

After months of tending to my hive, I finally had it up and running. These bees were in my care(( The writer has shown us that they’ve learned a big lesson from their past failures: they need support and guidance. I’m impressed that this time they are making an intentional change.)) —this was one hobby I couldn’t abandon. With that knowledge and Jeremy’s support, one hive grew to five. I’m not in it for the money or even the honey. I’m in it for the bees, for the millimeter of difference I’m making in their lives and in the life of the earth.

Through beekeeping, I have found a community of people who share my love for bees. Jeremy, the bees, and the entire beekeeping community have taught me not to quit. We support each other, share tips and advice, and work together to help protect these important insects. And in the process, I have learned that I can take up any new hobby I want and stick with it if I just put in enough effort(( Yep—the writer has come out of this journey on the other side, having learned that their effort does pay off.)) .

AO Notes on Beekeeper’s Club

As an admissions officer, it’s always fun to read about students’ eccentric hobbies. I’d count this as one of them. But what’s better than learning about the hobby is seeing a student’s personal growth.

What makes this essay good:

  • Personal journey: Most good personal statements show some kind of personal growth. In this case, we see that the writer has grown mature and aware enough to hold down a hobby. We see that it wasn’t an easy road, but they got there.
  • Strengths: There are lots of strengths in this personal statement. We see self-awareness, initiative, teamwork, and care for the bees and the planet.
  • Reflection: Part of what makes this personal journey so good is that the writer takes us on the journey with them through reflection. At each stage of the journey, we know exactly what the writer is thinking and feeling. By the end, we’re celebrating their success with them.

What the writer could do to level up:

  • Personal meaning: Yep, “personal journey” and “personal meaning” can be two separate things. Although the writer goes on a great personal journey, the personal meaning seems to be lacking a bit. It’s clear that this is an important topic to the writer, but it doesn’t exactly come across as an especially vulnerable one. The writer could make it more vulnerable by incorporating more personal meaning into their reflection: what would it have meant if they had quit beekeeping too? What’s the problem with dropping hobbies in the first place? Why is it personally important to learn to stick with things?

Personal Statement Example #9: Ann

Pushing her blonde curls from her forehead, she pursed her lips in focus(( This vivid, detailed description really draws me in.)) . She sat with legs crossed across the kitchen chair. This was it: the moment she’d been preparing for. Her tiny hand gripped the pencil as if it were a stick of dynamite and twitched her fingers up, down, and back again. She looked up at me and smiled, teeth too big for her growing mouth. “Ann,” the paper read. As I glowed back at my mini-me, I saw in her my whole heart(( And here the focus switches from Ann to the writer—an important transition.)) .

My sister was technically an accident, born when I was eleven years old. But I know that, in the grand scheme of things, Ann’s existence was destined by the cosmos. Watching her write was like looking in a mirror. My hair has long since turned brown, but she and I deal with the same unmanageable curls. Her toothy grin developed over five years of mutual laughter. And she got that unwavering focus from watching me do my own homework each night. At the same time I’ve taught her the ways of the world, she’s taught me joy, patience, and persistence(( Lessons learned! This sentence really draws attention to the main theme. It could be a little more specific because “joy, patience, and persistence” are almost cliche.)) .

I had been an only child for my first decade of life. I remember being lonely and without purpose. With Ann came the opportunity to make a real impact on someone, even as a child myself. The night she was born, I vowed to protect her. I had never seen anyone so small and fragile, and I begged my parents to let me hold her. Next to mine, her hand looked like a doll’s. It was purple and pink from the ordeal of birth. Her eyes barely opened, but I couldn’t keep mine off her.

Many older siblings find their younger siblings to be nuisances. But Ann has always been my best friend. Her first two years of life, she struggled with health issues that scared us all. I felt helpless and afraid, but I knew I had to fight alongside her. I did everything I could: I grabbed diapers and bottles for my parents, I talked to her for hours on end, and, when she was old enough, I spoon fed her and encouraged her to eat. As Ann grew bigger and stronger, I grew stronger, too(( It sounds like this was a really difficult challenge for the writer and their family. I appreciate this picture we get of the writer in relation to Ann.)) .

Each year has gotten better than the previous. I was there to catch Ann when she took her first steps, teach her her first words, and get her dressed every day. She tagged behind me as I took photos before my first dance, got my learner’s permit, and went on my college tours. While being a teen with a toddler sibling wasn’t always perfect, Ann’s mere presence makes those around her feel loved and appreciated. She’s exactly who I aspire to be.

Watching her write her name at the kitchen table, I became overwhelmed with the thought of leaving her to head off to college. She still has so much to learn, so many ways to grow. But just as the thought entered my mind, she spoke in her high-pitched and innocent voice. “When you go to college,” she asked, “will you tell me about your classes?” I blinked away the tears gathering in my eyes, smoothed her curls with my hand, and pulled her in close.

Going to college won’t mean leaving Ann. It will mean opening her world—and mine—to endless new knowledge and possibilities. She’ll grow and change, and so will I. When we reunite, we’ll smile our toothy smiles and embrace each other, our curly hair intertwining. We’ll sit at the kitchen table, focused and laughing, like nothing has changed(( I like how the siblings are continuing to grow together, but at the end of the day, they still have their amazing relationship.)) .

AO Notes on Ann

I always find sibling essays like this one so sweet. It’s amazing how clearly we can understand someone solely through their interactions with a loved one. As an admissions officer, I would see that this student would be a great community member (and roommate!).

  • Deeply meaningful: Especially with the family context, it’s apparent that this topic is deeply meaningful to the writer. Because it’s so meaningful a topic, the writer is able to show an immense amount of care for Ann without even trying. AOs love seeing traits like care, maturity, and the ability to grow.
  • Clear message: Personal statements should have themes that encompass the main message the writer wants to convey. This essay’s message is clear as day: the writer is a better, happier, more generous person because of Ann. They are an awesome sibling.
  • More about the self: This one’s tricky because we get an implicit sense of who the writer is now through the overall tone and meaning. But a lot of the personal examples the writer chose are old examples from childhood and early adolescence. Some of those are important to provide family context, but I still would have liked to get a more recent picture of the writer.

Personal Statement Example #10: Running through My Neighborhood

My mind and eyes began to wander as I turned the corner on my fourth mile. I’ve always been a runner. It's a way for me to relax and challenge myself. Running makes me feel like I’m one with the world around me. As I run, I can't help but be struck by the beauty of the buildings and people that make up my city. Each is a work of art—a carefully-crafted expression of my community. With every step, I feel a deep connection to the life around me(( This introduction covers a lot, so this last sentence could be a bit more specific.)) .

On my run, I find myself drawn to the intricate details of the buildings. I admire the way the light catches on centuries-old bricks, casting shadows that dance across the pavement below. I look up at the skyscraper windows that nearly touch the sky, frightened at the sight of window washers. Old and new, the buildings all carry stories.

In the same way, I admire the neighbors around me. I see them feeding pigeons, smiling at me as I pass by. They’re walking dogs and babies, talking on a park bench, and playing hopscotch. I run by them, fast but steady, and breathe it all in. I’m on this beautiful city block, surrounded by people whose whole lives are familiar yet mysterious, and I’m running.

But it's not just the aesthetic beauty of the buildings that grabs my attention. As I run, I find myself thinking about the stories and histories behind each one. I wonder about the people who built them, the families they had at home, the lives they led. I think about the people who have lived and worked in these buildings and the memories that have been made within their walls.

Take the local bakery, for instance. I’ve run by there a thousand times in my life, each time soaking up the smell of freshly-baked bread and pastries. The building seems unassuming at first, with a simple glass door and brick façade. But once you step foot inside, you’re immediately hit with the warmth of the staff and patrons. The old photos on the wall and cozy furniture that has been there since the bakery’s opening back in the 1950s—it feels like home(( These are great vivid details.)) . The bakery is everything I value about my neighborhood. It completely represents what kind of neighbor I want to be. Plus, it’s not a bad place for a post-run snack.

Through my runs, I’ve also made connections with those who frequent the sidewalks alongside me. One of the people I see regularly on my runs is Mrs. Carter, an elderly woman who always has a kind word and a smile for everyone she meets. Her white hair is carefully curled, and her face is dimpled with laugh lines from thousands of conversations like ours. She often stops to chat with me, asking how my day is going and sharing stories from her own life. I always look forward to seeing her. She’s like the grandmother I never had. Mrs. Carter inspires me to be a better community member every day(( This kind of reflection brings the focus back to the writer’s personal journey.)) .

Running through my neighborhood is about more than just staying fit. It’s also about being in community with those around me. As I weave through the people on the sidewalk, I feel as though I am weaving myself through their stories, picking up tidbits and adding them to my own narrative. I wouldn’t be who I am today without these runs that have taught me so much. I can’t wait to run across my college campus, admiring my new surroundings and meeting my new neighbors(( I like this gesture to the future—as an AO, I would start to picture this student running through my campus, too!)) .

AO Notes on Running through My Neighborhood

Running essays can get a bad rap in college admissions. But this one overcomes that stereotype. At its core, this essay is about the runner’s relationship to their community. I really appreciate how much care and enthusiasm this writer shows for those around them.

  • Writing: The writer’s voice shines through. They have great vivid descriptions, and we’re really able to envision ourselves in the neighborhood alongside them.
  • Personal meaning: The way the writer describes those they encounter in their neighborhood shows that this isn’t a minor part of their life. Their runs are a big deal. The people they see along the way have greatly shaped who they are.
  • Greater focus on self: Now, there are much worse culprits when it comes to personal essays that focus on people other than the writer. But the writer does toe the line. Their descriptions mostly focus on those around them, and while there is some reflection that connects their own experience to other people, it doesn’t actually take up much space in the essay. To level up, the writer could make this essay more about themself.

Personal Statement Example #11: Musical Installation Art

As a child, I was always drawn to stringed instruments(( The hook could have more punch, but this gets the job done.)) . I would pluck at my dad's old guitars, create makeshift harps with dental floss, and even play around with the banjo and harp in music class. As I got older, I realized that I wanted to focus on making my own instruments. And where better to start than in my dad's scrapyard? The yard sprawled out for almost five acres behind our house. It was a marvel of junk and oddities, with the accumulated garbage from hundreds of junker cars built up in our backyard. I grew up playing there, leading a childhood that most parents would probably see as reckless—rolling tires through narrow alleyways between crushed cars stacked high. But for me, the backyard was an endless playground for my imagination.

It was there that I discovered the joys of welding and soldering. I would rummage through piles of metal and find pieces that I could fashion into something new. My first sculptures were simple, resembling birds or dogs and pieced together from strips of metal. I’d look for similar art everywhere I went, grasping for inspiration. At a fair one weekend, I saw a booth run by an artist who built guitars. After speaking with him about his art, he asked to see a picture of my sculptures. I showed him and explained that I hoped to make my own instruments one day, too. He scuttled to the back of his tent and returned with a gift: a set of thick copper strings. “Try using those,”(( What an endearing story.)) he told me.

My first sculpture instrument was a crude thing—little more than a board of metal with pegs that I used to pull the copper strings tight. But I tightened them, I was in love—spending all night plucking away. At first, the instrument wailed and screeched. String by string, I delicately tuned the wires into sirens. I had created something that played music, and I was so proud.

My experience building the instrument motivated me to enroll in a sculpture class at the local community college. It was there that I learned how to properly solder metal and create more complex structures. For my final project, I made a three-foot-tall, four-stringed metal instrument in the shape of a dragon.

But as I worked, I started to realize that my dragon wasn't going to be beautiful in the traditional sense. Its metal body was jagged and uneven, and the strings were stretched tight across its back in a way that produced discordant, almost abrasive music. I tried to adjust the tuning, but no matter what I did, the music remained harsh and unpleasant.

At first, I was disappointed. I wanted my dragon to be a work of art, something that people would marvel at and love listening to. But as I continued to play with it, I started to see the beauty in the chaos(( This paragraph shows wonderful growth. And as a reader, I’m drawn in trying to imagine what the sculpture actually looks like.)) . The music it produced was like a musical language that I had invented, one that was wild and untamed. It was a reflection of my own creativity and individuality. A discordant collection of notes that sounded like they’d been tuned so as to be atonal. But I didn't care. I was a scrapyard kid, and this dragon played the song of my people: strong, innovative, and beautiful.

The combination of sculpture and music fascinates me. How does the shape of a fabrication affect the kind of sound that the object produces? What sounds do different materials produce? As I’ve learned more about sculpture, I’ve also become interested in installation art that has sound dimensions. I want to capture people’s visual and aural attention to inspire questions about how we navigate the aesthetic world(( It sounds like this topic potentially relates to the student’s future goals. If that’s true, there could be a clearer academic connection here.)) . And I’ll use whatever scraps I can find to make my creations.

AO Notes on Musical Installation Art

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a piece of musical installation art myself, so this topic really held my attention. I appreciate the journey the writer went on to learn that their art may not look like everyone else’s, but it can be just as impactful.

  • Topic: I like this topic not only because it’s not one you see every day but also because it lets the writer reveal a lot about themself and their background. We see where they grew up and who they grew up with, and we also learn about this deeply meaningful personal interest.
  • Writing style: This author has a very distinct writing style. In some ways, the writing style mirrors their art style—abrupt at times, melodic at others.
  • Organization: The first half of this essay doesn’t always match up with the second half. Even though we’re still able to see the writer’s journey as a metal artist and musician, there’s still a bit of streamlining that needs to happen.

Personal Statement Example #12: Ski Patrol

I can never get enough of being in the mountains(( This hook isn’t very compelling, so it could use some more attention.)) . I am a skier through and through. Growing up, I spent countless family vacations on the slopes with my dad and siblings. I love the rush I get speeding down the mountain—I’ve improved so much over my life that I can now handle most runs I come across. But last year, I took my love for skiing to a whole other level by joining ski patrol.

It was mid-December, and my family had decided to take a weekend away to go skiing. Everything was going normally at first. We had a good day on the slopes and wanted to go one more run before calling it a night. We took a moment to rest and watched the person in front of us go. Only seconds after she headed down the mountain, something happened with her ski. She catapulted into a nearby tree. People raced to check on her, while we stayed back and alerted ski patrol.

When ski patrol arrived, I watched in amazement. They moved in such a precise way. They were like a machine—everyone knew exactly what to do when. Thankfully, it was a false alarm and the skier only had a few scratches. But my own life was changed forever. I knew then that I wanted to be a part of this team, to help others in a tangible way and to make a difference on the mountain that had always been my home.

As soon as I could, I applied for the Junior Ski Patrol team. I had to go through a tryout process on the hill, which made me nervous. But it felt good to be surrounded by people who loved skiing as much as I do. Thankfully, I was accepted shortly after; it was one of the best days of my life. Now on Junior Ski Patrol, I have the opportunity to do what I love – skiing – while also making a positive impact on others(( And here we get to the heart of the essay. The writer wants to help others while doing something they love. It’s a noble pursuit!)) . My team shadows the adult Ski Patrol, and we learn a lot of lessons along the way.

On the mountain (and in life), you never know what challenges might arise. One of the most important things I’ve learned from Junior Ski Patrol is to be prepared for anything. I’ve gotten my CPR and first aid certifications so I’m always prepared to administer life-saving care to anyone who might need it. I know how to pack a bag full of enough essentials to survive harsh weather or injuries.

But ski patrol has also taught me so much more than just how to help others. It has shown me how I work best on a team. I’m not naturally a leader, which is something I’ve always felt ashamed about. After learning from our mentors who all fulfill different roles on their adult Ski Patrol team, I realized that I don’t have to be a leader to be a good team member. The quiet collaborators who can follow the lead, take initiative when needed, and do their jobs really well are just as important as the people who are front-and-center(( An important personal insight.)) .

Being on ski patrol as a high school student has been an incredible journey, and I am grateful for the opportunity to be a part of such a dedicated team. More importantly, I’m proud of the growth I’ve experienced. I went from a person who just loves skiing to a person who is more confident in herself. I no longer feel unprepared or timid. I know exactly how to keep myself safe and work alongside others. While I don’t want to be a professional Ski Patroller or even go into medicine, I know these lessons will serve me well wherever life takes me(( As an AO, I would have been wondering if being on JSP made them want to study medicine, so I appreciate that they answered it for me!)) . But no matter where I end up, when the mountain calls, you know I’ll answer.

AO Notes on Ski Patrol

In this fun hobby-meets-accomplishment essay, the writer shows us their strengths of care and teamwork. I like the crossover between something that they really enjoy and this impressive accomplishment they have of being on Junior Ski Patrol.

  • Lessons learned: The writer makes it very clear what lessons they learned from Junior Ski Patrol. Lessons don’t always have to be this explicit, but I appreciate how the writer really takes the time to reflect on what they’ve learned.
  • Personal insight: Okay, this point is related to the lessons learned. But it’s important to draw out on its own because personal essays are, of course, personal. This topic easily could have been just about skiing down a mountain or administering first aid on patrol. Instead, the writer kept the focus inward to meet the expectations of a personal essay.
  • What’s at stake?: We do get a good sense of personal meaning. But the writer could do a better job of speaking to the significance of this activity to their life. A good question to ask is, “What’s at stake?” What would I have lost or gained if this story had turned out differently? Asking these questions can also help you figure out what it is that you want an admissions officer to learn from your personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #13: The Regulars

One pump of vanilla syrup. Frothed milk. One espresso shot. Caramel drizzle(( Starting with some version of the following sentence would have been a stronger hook.)) . Like a scientist at her bench, I have methodically repeated these steps four days a week for the past two years. During my time as a Starbucks barista, I’ve learned hundreds of recipes and customizations. I know all the secret menu hacks, and I’ve developed several recipes for friends and family too. I pride myself on speed, quality, and memory. My favorite part of the job is the customer service. As one of the busiest locations in the region, I’ve caffeinated thousands. But it’s my regular customers, those whose orders I know like the back of my hand, who have truly impacted me.

Venti Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew, hold the vanilla syrup. A busy mom of four, Chelsea is always in a hurry. I try to catch her the moment she enters the store so I can get started right away. Her Venti drink fuels her through school dropoffs and pickups, gymnastics lessons, and evening math homework. Throughout my conversations with her, I’ve learned that Chelsea is a scheduling virtuoso. As someone with ADHD(( This paragraph is almost too much about Chelsea, so this sentence is crucial to bring the focus back to the writer.)) , I became so inspired by her ability to juggle so many people and schedules simultaneously. After asking her for advice, she helped me find a time management system that I can keep up with. I have Chelsea to thank for my improved grades.

Grande dark roast, no room for cream. Mr. Williams is a retired businessman who always tips 100%. Mr. Williams is a quiet man, so it took me months to draw any information from him. Instead of using my over-the-top customer service voice, I eventually learned to be myself. When I got him to open up, I discovered that he was a service worker himself before he made it big in business in his sixties. The truth is, Mr. Williams has tipped me hundreds of dollars throughout my time here, which is extra money that will help me pay for college. He’s taught me the value of quiet generosity(( Let’s be honest. Mr. Williams sounds like a cool guy. But Mr. Williams isn’t applying to college—the writer is! I like that we get small glimpses into who the writer is through this paragraph, but there’s still room for more.)) .

Tall soy London Fog. Sweet Darla gave up coffee twenty-five years ago, but she still loves an occasional treat. When Darla enters, I clear my schedule. She always has stories to tell about the eighty years of life she’s lived. Darla is everything I want to be at that age: she’s spunky, opinionated, and hilarious(( Here we learn a lot about the writer through Darla.)) . Sometimes I tell Darla stories of my own. When I explained the dramatic series of events that led to me landing first chair in my symphony, she said she was going to retell it her bridge club. Making Darla laugh so hard will always be one of my proudest moments.

Grande iced matcha. Taylor is my age and goes to my school. When I took her order for the first time, I felt embarrassed that I needed to work to support myself while she could enjoy expensive drinks. But her kindness softened me. As time went on, I learned that she visited Starbucks so much because she wanted to get out of her house, which wasn’t a very happy place. While I have to take on as many shifts as possible, I still have a happy home to return to afterward. Now Taylor comes in near the end of my shift so we can take our drinks and have dinner at my house.

When you work in customer service, customers enter and exit your life like a revolving door. But the regulars, those special people who draw connections from daily but brief interactions, stick with you for life. I wouldn’t be who I am today if it weren’t for these people, and I would never have met them if it weren’t for my job as a barista. I haven’t just been making drinks these past two years. I’ve been making friends(( The conclusion does a good job tying all these different stories back together. )) .

AO Notes on The Regulars

No one appreciates a good barista story more than a tired admissions officer on their 30th application of the day! I like the personality that comes through in this essay especially. But this is one of those cases where it’s almost too much about other people.

  • Creative take: Not every college essay needs a creative flair. In fact, sometimes going for “unique” structures can detract from an essay. But I like how the writer uses this format to structure the essay.
  • Organization: This essay isn’t one a reader is bound to get lost in. The introduction sets up the essay well, it’s easy to see the connections between the points the writer is conveying, and the conclusion brings the focus back to the writer.
  • More focus on self: While we do learn about the writer in this essay, we also learn a lot about Chelsea, Mr. Williams, Darla, and Taylor. The writer could have pared down the descriptions of other people—or cut one of the examples altogether—to save more room for personal reflection.

“Bad” Personal Statement Examples

These “bad” essays aren’t necessarily bad. They just aren’t very effective personal statements. Specifically, these two essays make some of the biggest college essay mistakes.

Making mistakes, especially when you’ve never written a personal statement before, is to be expected. We’ve included these examples so you can see what those mistakes look like in real-time. Learning from ineffective examples can be just as helpful as learning from the exceptional ones, so grab your pencil and start taking notes.

Our admissions officers have highlighted what’s working and what’s not. They offer helpful commentary and advice for revisions that you can use to assess your own personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #14: The Worst Year

My sophomore year of high school presented me with so many challenges(( This hook definitely gets straight to the point, but it doesn’t draw me in as a reader.)) . I struggled with a lot that year and barely managed to get by. It was the greatest challenge I ever faced.

The year started out like any other but soon went into chaos. My brother suddenly started struggling with drugs and alcohol. Before that, we didn’t know how bad he was hurting. But one night he finally came to us for help because apparently he had been using substances to cope with his emotions. He was scared because he felt like he had reached a breaking point and needed support. My parents didn’t want to help because they thought that he didn’t have a problem but I know my brother and I knew that he didn’t seem like himself. It was so sad to watch him go through that. I tried my best to help him but I was only a kid. I couldn’t really do anything besides tell him I loved him. Eventually my parents decided to get him some help, so he went away for a while and I wrote him letters every week and visited him as much as I could. The treatment he got helped thankfully. He’s doing better now and I am grateful that he is my brother.

But then Covid hit and I couldn’t even leave my house. We thought it would just be a two week vacation to school but it turned into two whole years of my life gone just like that. At the beginning I was stuck in my bedroom while my parents were working their jobs from the living room. Everyone was constantly getting annoyed with each other and driving each other wild. I would be doing a class Zoom in my room and I could hear my parents in a meeting in the living room. I had a hard time not being able to see my friends. I couldn't focus and my grades dropped. Even my teachers didn’t really seem to care. I was sick of staring at black Zoom screens all the time that I even stopped logging on. All of that combined led to me becoming very depressed and anxious. My grades dropped even more because I just couldn’t pay attention or focus enough to do my homework. I ended up getting grades way lower than I ever thought I would that year and I’m so frustrated about it because it felt like I was trying my best but it just wasn’t enough(( Here we see the writer opening up a bit and reflecting on what it was like to go through that experience.)) .

Even once we finally got back in school things didn’t get much better. The pandemic was just too much for my family so my parents ended up getting divorced at the beginning of my junior year. After all we had been through together seeing them separate made me devastated. My dad got an apartment and I had to go back and forth between their houses and pack up all my stuff every time. It was like moving my entire life every weekend. My brother was out of the house by this point so it was just me all by myself. My school was far from my dad’s new place so I’d have a long commute on the weeks I was with him. He was stressed at work and about the divorce and I just ended up feeling so lonely and spending most of my time in my room. My grades got better once online school stopped(( This moment of hope does a lot for moving the essay forward.)) but I had a hard time keeping close relationships with my friends because they didn’t like that I was living far away now and that we couldn’t really hang out anymore.

I couldn’t believe that two years would change so much. Getting through everything really challenged me. But I’m glad to be moving forward with my life.

AO Notes on The Worst Year

This student definitely had a challenging year. It’s clear that they’ve overcome a lot, and I appreciate their willingness to share their struggles. I like that the very last sentence

What this essay does well:

  • Vulnerability: Writing about challenges is never easy, especially when you’re writing to people you don’t know. This writer is bold and unafraid in doing so.

What could be improved on:

  • Not enough positivity: Here’s the thing. You definitely don’t need to be able to spin all of your challenging experiences into positive ones. But the topics you choose to write your college essay about should ultimately conclude on a positive note. You want your college essay to show you in a positive light, so you should choose a topic that lets you find a light, positive, or hopeful resolution.

Personal Statement Example #15: The Strikeout that Changed My Life

The stadium lights shone brightly in my eyes. I stepped up to the plate and drew back my bat. I wiggled my fingers, waiting. The pitcher wound up his arm and threw the ball towards me. My eyes worked overtime to track the ball. I watched as it flew directly towards the center of the plate and made a last-minute curve(( I like this vivid description.)) . It went straight into the catcher’s mitt. “Strike three!” the umpire yelled. That was the time I struck out at the quarter-finals. My team was so close to making it to the championship that we could taste it. It was the bottom of the sixth, and I gave up a valuable chance to score game-winning runs. We ended up losing. I learned a valuable lesson that fateful day. I never wanted to let my team down like that again(( And the writer jumps quickly into the main theme of the essay. Still, the message here could be more specific.)) .

We had advanced through our bracket without much trouble. The other teams were no match for our work ethic and teamwork. We were in perfect sync. As the first baseman, I was ready for any throw that came my way. We were also hitting well. I scored three home runs throughout the course of the tournament. We were a high-functioning machine. But for a machine to work, each cog has to function correctly. When I stepped up to the plate in the sixth inning, I was a broken cog.

After our quarter–final loss, I grieved with my teammates. Then I went off on my own to think. How had I let my team down so badly? How did I not even try to swing at that pitch? It was all my fault. I had to figure out what I had done wrong so I would never make the mistake again. I realized that I had been thinking selfishly. I was concerned about my own performance, my own at-bat averages(( This is a good reflection.)) . I was scared of failing because I didn’t want to be embarrassed. And worrying about all of those things caused me to lose focus and miss my chance to make a difference. Instead, I should have been thinking about how my at-bat would contribute to my team’s overall goal of winning the game.

I returned to where my teammates were congregating, and several of them patted me on the back. The next day, we went over how the game went as a team and talked about how we could improve at our tournament the following weekend. I admitted that I felt like I let the team down. My teammates said that they understood and reassured me that mistakes happen. It wasn’t my failed at-bat alone that lost us the game. Like winning, losing is a team effort. It was a culmination of lots of little issues. At the end of the day, the other team just out-performed us. But we could try hard, practice a lot, and return triumphant next weekend.

Letting my team down was a crushing blow to my self-esteem. I never want to feel like that again, but I know that the experience caused me to grow. Through all of this, I learned that I have to trust myself and my team(( Here we get to the lesson learned.)) . Focusing on myself alone can only get me so far. But focusing on my team can get me to where I want to go. I’m actually thankful that I struck out in that sixth inning because it caused me to learn an important life lesson.

AO Notes on The Strikeout that Changed My Life

This essay on its own definitely isn’t “bad.” As far as essays go, it’s clear, well-written, and organized nicely. But as a college essay, it could be doing more work on the writer’s behalf. See, as an admissions officer, I don’t actually learn that much about the writer from this essay alone. I see that they like baseball, are a good teammate, and can overcome failure. Those are wonderful traits, but they don’t exactly help set this student apart on the admissions committee floor. Instead, the student could make this essay more vulnerable and personal.

  • Writing: The writer uses some great creative writing skills to really set the scene for the readers. In that first paragraph, I really feel like I’m there watching the game.
  • Reflection: Even though the topic could be more significant, the writer does a great job reflecting on the meaning they drew from the experience.
  • Significance: It’s very clear that this topic holds a lot of meaning to the writer. But as a college essay topic, it lacks vulnerability and stakes.

Key Takeaways

Writing a personal statement is a difficult ask, especially when you’ve never even read one before. But now, with these fifteen examples in your back pocket, you’re ready to write your own.

If you’re not sure what steps to take next, hop on over to our guide to writing personal statements for advice. You can also find more extensive guidance on the Essay Academy , a comprehensive college essay writing video course and community.

Happy writing! 🥳

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 How to Write a Personal Statement with Examples

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What is a personal statement?

How to write a personal statement, what to include in a personal statement, personal statement examples, tips for writing a personal statement.

A personal statement highlights your industry credentials, previous noteworthy accomplishments, what you can bring to the company and how your interest in the role can achieve a company’s goals. What you write in a personal statement also conveys a great deal about yourself, including your talents, goals, outlook and work ethic. This article shares steps and examples that you can follow when writing your own personal statement.

A personal statement is a description that combines your notable abilities and career objectives in a brief paragraph to help hiring managers determine whether your qualifications are suitable for a position. It also summarizes substantial information that shows how much you understand the job. When writing a personal statement, it’s vital to make a connection between you and your desired job. 

Here are some steps to follow when writing a personal statement:

1. Firstly, research the company

Read the company’s profiles, achievements, vision and goals. Analyze and understand the position for which you’re applying, and find ways to connect it to the company’s overall goals. 

2. Then, make a list of your achievements

Create a list of your education and academic qualifications, training, accomplishments, skills and experience relevant to the job. Pick the most noteworthy achievements out of this list to add to your personal statement.

3. Next, demonstrate your qualifications

Using your knowledge about the company, write a brief paragraph about why you are the best person for the job. Be sure to add the most important details about you and your professional life, which includes highlighting how employing you can help the company fulfill its goals.

4. Finally, keep your personal statement short and readable

While there is no definite word count, a good personal statement should usually be about a paragraph long. What’s essential is that you can summarize all of the crucial points within a few detailed sentences. Keeping your statement easily readable can ensure that you maintain an employer’s attention.

If you’re applying to a job or updating your resume, one of the first things to do is to write a compelling personal statement highlighting essential details about yourself and your professional achievements. 

Here are the following parts you can use to help you write a personal statement:

Personal history

A good personal statement shares details that will give the hiring manager an idea of who you are both as a person and as an employee. For example, if you’re looking for an entry-level position, you can note that you’ve graduated with honors. As another example, listing your experience as a team leader can make it easier to demonstrate your qualifications for a management position. Make sure the personal history you include aligns with the position and the company’s goals.

Skills and work contributions

Your personal statement should emphasize the skill sets and talents that you can contribute to the company. Your expertise is not limited to technical aspects. It could also be communication, leadership, time management and similar skills. Communicate how these substantial assets of yours can contribute to the company’s objectives.

An example could be explaining how your expertise in programming software helped your former company secure a long-term contract. Describe how the company can benefit from your skill and experience.

Purpose and career goals

Your purpose conveys how your chosen career path aligns with the position you’re applying for. Although you can write about how the job will help your professional interests, it’s more important to identify how the company can benefit from hiring you.

For example, it could be as simple as your eagerness to seek a position as an operations supervisor, which means you must highlight how your leadership skills can help you manage teams so they can reach a sales quota. Start by explaining how your education, skills and experience have prepared you for the leadership role and, subsequently, how it can benefit the company.

Although it is a personal statement, it is best to find a balance between your individual and professional details. Keep in mind that you also only need to include details that are relevant to the position. If you’re trying to become a graphic artist, for example, focus primarily on your artistic achievements, awards, experience and goals in your statement.

Here are some examples of personal statements for different goals and career paths:

Engineering personal statement

‘Accomplished mechanical engineer with a master’s degree in modeling and simulation and more than 10 years of supervisory experience in an international manufacturing company. My technical and problem-solving skills helped develop test procedures that increased machine sales by 65% in a single financial year.’

Photographer personal statement

‘Veteran photographer with over five years of experience serving as a trainer for both photographers and editors in a regional publishing house. Supervised photo shoots for magazine features and covers that earned national recognition and awards. Searching for a leadership position in a national publication.’

Sales director personal statement

‘Target-oriented sales director within the tourism sector with over 20 years of experience in sustainable travel management. Proven success in both environmental tours and managing farm-to-table restaurants and accommodation. Increased previous company’s sales by 60% by implementing a two-year marketing plan.’

Here are some tips you can use when writing your personal statement:

  • Use a template.  Have a general personal statement you can use as a template and then customize it depending on the job description.
  • Use specific keywords and quantifiable metrics.  This can help your resume or cover letter make it through any application tracking software.
  • Talk to your colleagues. The people you work with can give you deeper insight into your work output and character.
  • Focus on the content first and the length later. You don’t need to worry much about the length of your statement when making a draft. You can always edit and shorten it.
  • Use action words.  Descriptive words make it easier for employers to envision the achievements you’ve accomplished in your professional life.
  • Make a strong first impression. A personal statement is often the first impression you make on a hiring manager. Because of this, it’s important to select only keywords, skills and experiences that are significant to your desired position.

A guide to writing the best personal statement for your college application (with template and examples!)

Why is boasting about a best friend SO much easier than writing about yourself? Unfortunately, writing about yourself is exactly what a personal statement essay requires you to do–whether it’s for your college admissions application, or for a scholarship application to pay for college . Here’s our guide, to ensure you’re well-equipped to write a killer personal statement!

Student writing personal statement

First off, what’s the purpose of a personal statement?

What topics can i write about, how do i decide what to focus on, in my college essay, okay, i’ve got my personal statement topic. but now i have to actually write it. 😱what do i do .

  • Do you have personal statement examples? 

Now it’s your turn.

Your personal statement should share something about who you are, something that can’t be found in your resume or transcript.

For colleges:

  • It should paint a picture for colleges to understand who we are and what we bring to the table. This is why it’s often better to tell a story, or give examples, rather than just list accomplishments.
  • It should complement the other parts of your application. Consider your college application as a whole. Your personal statement, application short answers, and supporting documentation should together tell a story about who you are. This also means not being super repetitive with your personal statement and your short essays. (For instance, if you have to answer 3 questions AND submit a personal statement, maybe they shouldn’t ALL focus on music.)

For scholarship applications:

  • It should indicate why you’re deserving of the scholarship. This often means making sure your essay relates to the scholarship provider’s goals. (Get more help on writing a killer scholarship essay here , and then make sure you’re applying as efficiently as possible. )
  • It should showcase your strengths. This doesn’t mean it can’t acknowledge any weaknesses, but it surely shouldn’t only focus on negative aspects!

Student writing personal statement draft

It can be overwhelming to figure out where to start. First, figure out what your choices are. Some colleges may have very specific college essay prompts. That said, many students apply using the Common App, which this year offers these 7 topics to choose from : 

  • Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.
  • The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? ( Psst – If you choose this topic, you can sign up for Going Merry and apply for a scholarship bundle : one essay, multiple scholarships! )
  • Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome?
  • Describe a problem you’ve solved or a problem you’d like to solve. It can be an intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma – anything that is of personal importance, no matter the scale. Explain its significance to you and what steps you took or could be taken to identify a solution.
  • Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.
  • Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?
  • Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you’ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

You’ll notice that #7 is a catch-all that allows you to submit any personal statement about anything at all . 

So maybe that doesn’t help you narrow it down. 

Here’s a 3-step solution:

STEP 1. Brainstorm about your life

Dedicate 5-10 minutes each to brainstorming about these 4 sets of questions.

You can do this by yourself (writing down your thoughts), or do this exercise out loud with a friend or family member, and then jot down notes as you’re talking. If you “think out loud” better than you do on paper, brainstorming with someone else may be the way to go! 

(A) What were defining moments in your life?

How did these moments in your life changed you, what did you learn from it, and how has it shaped your future plans? Some topics might include:

  • An accident or injury
  • A best friend you made (or lost)
  • A defining talk with a peer
  • Something new you tried for the first time
  • Revealing a sexual or gender identity, to friends or family
  • Discovering something about your family ( e.g., see Jesus’s story )
  • Moving to a new city
  • Traveling somewhere, or learning about a new culture ( e.g., see Gabby’s story )
  • Your first pet (new responsibilities as a fur mom or dad)

(B) What have you chosen to spend time on?

Remember to focus not just on the what , but also the why – What were your motivations? How did you feel? What have you learned? Some topics on this might include: 

  • The moment you joined band, color guard, or the soccer team. 
  • A time you struggled with that activity – e.g., Maybe you got passed over for captain of the soccer? Or maybe you got an injury and had to sit out on the sidelines? 
  • Maybe a moment you really fell in love with that activity – e.g. Maybe the first time you investigated a story for the school newspaper and realized journalism was your calling?

(C) Whom or what are you inspired by?

How did you find out about this person or thing? Why are you inspired? In what ways are you inspired? Is there anything that inspiration has made you do (e.g. join a club, do an activity or internship on the topic)? Some topics on this might include: 

  • Technology – Maybe a specific App made you inspired to learn to code? 
  • Person in your life – Maybe meeting someone (or knowing someone in your family) has affected you? 
  • A show, movie, book, or podcast that inspired you to look at life differently
  • A dance or song that has made you interested in performing arts

(D) What are you proud of?

Make a list of all the things you’re proud of. These can be milestones, hobbies, qualities, or quirks that are what make you, you. Topics to consider might be:

  • Times you saved the day – like that epic left-handed catch you made on the field
  • Personal qualities – Maybe you’re really funny, or amazingly calm under pressure. What are some examples of times when you showed those qualities?
  • Random life things you’re amazing at – Baking a mean chocolate brownie. Guessing how many gumballs are in a jar. Tell a story when that amazing talent was handy!

Don’t worry if some of your ideas repeat between sections. This is just a way to get ideas flowing! 

College student writing

STEP 2. Shortlist your ideas

Identify your strongest ideas out of the bunch. This should probably be very few (2-4).

STEP 3. Freewrite about your possible essay topics.

Once you’ve brainstormed some ideas and identified 2-4 winners, we agree with Find the Right College – just start freewriting! Start by writing a few sentences or paragraphs about any of your shortlisted topics, and let the words flow. Write for about 15 minutes, on each shortlisted topic. Don’t worry about structure or organization – this is just an exercise so you feel comfortable getting the thoughts out of your head and onto paper. 

It will also allow you to see which of the topics seems to have the most “legs” — often, you’ll notice that your best topic will:

  • Be the easiest to write about (those 15 minutes flew by!)
  • Lead you to tell at least one interesting story
  • Feel like it genuinely reveals something important about who you are
  • Not be captured easily by other parts of your application (you’ll need a full 500 words to really be able to tackle this meaty topic)

Student reviewing personal statement template

Well, let’s start here: What makes a personal statement good or even great ?

Here are some things to keep in mind: 

1. Get personal.

Remember the “personal” in personal statement. We all have a story to tell, and we all have a different journey that led us to where we are today. We might think “someone already wrote about this” or we might think our story isn’t unique, but IT IS.

2. Speak like you.

Write your personal statement in a genuine tone that reflects who you are . There’s no right or wrong tone – just make sure your tone represents YOU. This means, in particular, not using big words just to show off. Often, this just seems like you’re trying to hard. (Or, even worse, you accidentally use the word incorrectly!)

3. Think about your audience.

Who will you be writing your personal statement for? What message do you want to convey? If it’s for to the college admissions committee, how do you show you’ll align well with the culture of the school? If it’s for a scholarship provider, how do you show you support their mission?

4. Hit the big three: Story, Implication, Connection to college/major.

Most successful college essays do at least 3 things: 

  • Mention at least one anecdote or story. (“Show, don’t tell.”)
  • Explain why that anecdote or story is important to who you are.
  • End (or begin) by connecting this information, to why you are applying to this specific college. This may include information about the major (why you think their department/program is great), or more general information about what attracts you to the school (e.g., location, sports, extracurricular activities, Greek life). Get specific so the school knows you’re really interested in them! This is the one piece of your personal statement that probably shouldn’t be cut & paste.

Here’s an example of how to use that personal essay template:

  • Story: When I was 11, my family traveled to Italy and visited museums — one specific painting made me fall in love with art. ( 1-2 paragraphs )
  • Why important: After that trip, I did lots of art and studied lots of art. Mention specific extracurriculars. ( 3 paragraphs )
  • Why this college: I want to apply to X college because of its excellent art program, which I can also complement by joining Y and Z clubs. Since it’s in New York, it’ll also offer my the opportunity to visit the countless art museums like MOMA. ( 1 paragraph )

5. Hit the length.

Make sure you keep within the required length. Normally if you aim for 500 words, you’re golden. Some college or scholarship applications will allow you to write up to 600 or 650 words.

6. Edit your work.

Once you’ve written your personal statement, step away from it. There was a time when we used to rely on pencil and paper to write down all of our ideas and information (including first-draft college essays). Now, we mainly rely on screens, so our eyes grow tired, causing us to miss typos and grammar mistakes.

So save that document in an easy-to-find folder on your computer. Then stepping away from your computer and taking a break helps relax your mind and body and then refocus when you come back to edit the document.

( Psst – If you’re applying for scholarships with Going Merry, we’ve got built-in spellcheck, and we allow you to save essays in your documents folder, so no work will get lost! )

We can’t stress this one enough: Don’t submit your personal statement without checking your spelling, grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, etc.! All the grammar things! Your personal statement reflects who you are, from the topic you choose to the style you write it in, so impress colleges (or scholarship providers) with excellent structure and great grammar!

7. Then, ask someone else to edit it too.

We recommend asking a friend, counselor, or parent to read your personal statement before you submit the document. One more set of eyes will really help you get a second opinion on the tone, writing quality, and overall representation of who you are in your personal statement.

8. Be brave, and hit that “submit” button on your personal statement!

Finally, when everything is completed, click submit! Don’t hold back!

9. Remember, personal statements for your college app, can also be reused as scholarship essays.

Get double-use out of your personal statement. Going Merry is your home for all things scholarships–fill out a profile, get matched to eligible scholarships, and apply. You can even save essays so that you can easily upload the same one for multiple scholarship applications. (We were inspired by the Common App to make applying for scholarships easier.)

Register for an account here , get the full lowdown on how it works , or just sign up for the newsletter below (to get 20 scholarship opportunities delivered to our inbox each each week!).

High school student writing personal statement

Do you have personal statement examples ? 

Oh yes we do. First, here are some excerpts of personal statements from members of our very own Going Merry team!

Charlie Maynard, Going Merry CEO – wrote about what matters most to him and why, for his grad school application.

  • The open paragraph read: “Being open to new ideas and able to take advantage of opportunities is what is most important to me. The most extraordinary times in my life have come as a result of moments when I’ve seized opportunities. This has been evident in my educational life, my travels around the world and my professional career.”
  • This anchored the main topic of his essay. He then went on to explain examples.

Charlotte Lau, Going Merry Head of Growth – wrote for her college Common App personal statement:

“As a child, I was never close with my father, though we were always on good terms. He made me laugh and taught me all the things that made me into a young tomboy: what an RBI is, how to correctly hook a fish when I feel it biting, what to bring on a camping trip. But whenever I was upset, he wouldn’t know how to comfort me. He is a man of jokes and words, not of comforting motions.

But as I grew older and I too became infatuated with words—albeit in written form—our topics of conversation became more diverse and often more profound. We continued to watch sports games together, but during commercials, we’d have epistemological and ethical discussions more fitting for a philosophy class than a chat during a Knicks’ time-out. During these talks, my father would insert stories about his youth. They’d always be transitory or anecdotal, told as if they were beside the point. Still, I’d eagerly commit them to memory, and, over time, I began to get a sense of who my father was—and, in turn, who I am.”

Now, here are some excerpts from other sample personal statements:

These 3 are college essays about personal characteristics:

Essay 1: Humorous essay about getting a D and learning a lesson

“Getting a D probably isn’t the worst thing in the world, but it’s not something anyone wants to see, let alone put, on a college application. It came back to me, scrawled in red, on the first big history test of the year. The one the teacher had assured us was a third of our grade. I could already see my chances of a four-year college going up in smoke and my school year hadn’t even started yet.

What happened? I’m not a D student. I’ll get the occasional C as well as the occasional A. D’s are out of character for me, and enough of a stomach punch to really get my attention. The short version is, I didn’t study, and I don’t remember precisely why. There is always a reason not to study, isn’t there? I didn’t study and I went into a test woefully unprepared and got beaten up.

I had two options here. I could accept that I was in fact a D student despite what I had thought. Or I could study hard for the next test and try to bring my grade up by the force of the average.”

Essay 2: Why a talent (in this case, one at football) is also a responsibility

“Talent is not remarkable. It’s usually the first thing anyone compliments. “You’re so talented.” It doesn’t mean what they think it means. It doesn’t mean I worked hard. It means I was lucky, or blessed, or anything else you want to call it.

I have talent. I’ve known since I was old enough to hold a football. The game just makes intuitive sense to me. The pathways of the players, both my team and the others, where the ball has to go, and what I’m doing. In the silence before a snap, I’m already playing out what is going to happen, watching the holes in my lines, tracing the route of my receivers. […]

It is far too easy to view talent as an excuse. For me, it is a motivator. For my talent, I will accept nothing less than a dream that only a tiny percentage of people ever get to experience. To get there, I’m willing to work hard and wring every last accomplishment from myself.

Talent is a responsibility. Because you had nothing to do with acquiring it, you are compelled to achieve every last bit you can with it. While I had grown used to thinking varsity would be it, that was not the case. Now, I can focus on the goal while I accomplish the steps.”

Essay 3: On living with depression

“Before I was diagnosed, I had been told it was a normal part of growing up. I was told that teens are moody. I would grow out of it. I couldn’t imagine anyone growing out of what I was feeling. I couldn’t imagine anyone surviving.

Diagnosis and medication have saved my life, allowing me to see the world as people without my brain chemistry would. […] what I found was a place of tiny kindnesses.

It might sound bad—as though kindness can only exist in the smallest forms. This is not what I mean. There are extraordinary people out there who devote their lives to doing very large, very important things for others. I’m not talking about them, partially because they are extraordinary. They are not the norm.

What is normal are the tiny kindnesses. These do not cost a person much of anything. A slice of time, a moment of openness, and little else. They are a smile when you’re feeling down, a comforting hand on the shoulder, a moment to talk.”

And here are 3 college personal statements, about what drove their interest in their intended major: 

Essay 4: On why this applicant wants to study music

“My great-great-uncle Giacomo Ferrari was born in 1912 in Neverland, NY, the youngest of four sons. His parents had emigrated from Italy with his two eldest brothers in the early 1900s in search of a better life in America. Their struggles as immigrants are in themselves inspiring, but the challenges they faced are undoubtedly similar to those that many other immigrant families had to overcome; because of this, the actions that my relatives embarked upon are that much more extraordinary. Giacomo’s oldest brother Antonio, my great-grandfather, decided to take a correspondence course in violin, and to teach his youngest brother Giacomo how to play as well. Giacomo Ferrari eventually became an accomplished violinist and started a free “Lunchtime Strings” program for all the elementary schools in the Neverland area, giving free violin lessons and monthly concerts.

As a native English speaker who has had the privilege of studying viola and violin with trained, private teachers, I can only imagine the perseverance it took for my great-grandfather and great-great uncle to learn an instrument like the violin out of booklets and lessons that were not even written in their native language. Their passion and dedication to learning something new, something not part of their lives as blue-collar, immigrant workers, and their desire to share it with others, has inspired me as a musician and a person. It is this spirit that has motivated me to pursue an MA at Composition at the University of XXX.”

Essay 5: On why this applicant wants to be an allergy specialist

“Suddenly I started scratching my neck, feeling the hives that had started to form. I rushed to the restroom to throw up because my throat was itchy and I felt a weight on my chest. I was experiencing anaphylactic shock, which prevented me from taking anything but shallow breaths. I was fighting the one thing that is meant to protect me and keep me alive – my own body.

[…] After that incident, I began to fear. I became scared of death, eating, and even my own body. As I grew older, I became paranoid about checking food labels and I avoided eating if I didn’t know what was in the food. I knew what could happen if I ate one wrong thing, and I wasn’t willing to risk it for a snack. Ultimately, that fear turned into resentment; I resented my body for making me an outsider.

In the years that followed, this experience and my regular visits to my allergy specialist inspired me to become an allergy specialist. Even though I was probably only ten at the time, I wanted to find a way to help kids like me. I wanted to find a solution so that nobody would have to feel the way I did; nobody deserved to feel that pain, fear, and resentment. As I learned more about the medical world, I became more fascinated with the body’s immune responses, specifically, how a body reacts to allergens.”

Essay 6 : On why this applicant wants to study medicine  

“My passion for teaching others and sharing knowledge emanates from my curiosity and love for learning. My shadowing experiences in particular have stimulated my curiosity and desire to learn more about the world around me. How does platelet rich plasma stimulate tissue growth? How does diabetes affect the proximal convoluted tubule? My questions never stopped. I wanted to know everything and it felt very satisfying to apply my knowledge to clinical problems. distinct concepts together to form a coherent picture truly attracts me to medicine.

It is hard to separate science from medicine; in fact, medicine is science. However, medicine is also about people—their feelings, struggles and concerns. Humans are not pre-programmed robots that all face the same problems. Humans deserve sensitive and understanding physicians. Humans deserve doctors who are infinitely curious, constantly questioning new advents in medicine. They deserve someone who loves the challenge of problem solving and coming up with innovative individualized solutions. I want to be that physician. I want to be able to approach each case as a unique entity and incorporate my strengths into providing personalized care for my patients. Until that time, I may be found Friday mornings in the operating room, peering over shoulders, dreaming about the day I get to hold the drill.”

Students writing personal statements

You made it this far. Now, it’s time to write your personal statement!

Ready to reuse your personal statement for scholarship applications? Sign up for Going Merry today for free to keep track of your scholarship applications and essays. We’re your one-stop shop for scholarship searches and applications.

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How To Write A Personal Statement (With Examples)

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Whether you want to apply to colleges, graduate programs, or competitive jobs, writing a persuasive personal statement will give you a leg up over the other applicants. A personal statement gives you a chance to express your qualifications, motivations, and long-term objectives in a way that gets hiring managers and admissions boards excited to meet you.

No matter why you’re writing a personal statement, we’re here to help you stand out from the crowd.

Key Takeaways:

To write a personal statement, first brainstorm, then narrow down your ideas, and start with an intro that leads into your qualifications.

Make sure to proofread your personal statement before submitting.

Personal statements describe your interests, skills, and goals, with a particular focus on your passion.

Personal statements are typically found in academia, however some professional organizations may also request one.

How To Write A Personal Statement (With Examples)

What Is a Personal Statement?

How to write a personal statement, tips for writing a strong personal statement, questions to ask yourself when writing a personal statement, when do i need a personal statement, academic personal statement examples, professional personal statement example, personal statement faq.

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A personal statement is a written work that describes your skills, areas of interest, accomplishments, and goals. It is typically included with a college or scholarship application, and sometimes used as part of job applications as well.

Personal statements are a chance for you to show an admissions board or a hiring committee what makes you special outside of your resume . Think of it as an in-depth cover letter where you get to detail not only your skills, but why you’re so passionate about the subject.

Short of an interview, it’s the best way to show your personality in a way that (hopefully) convinces someone to hire or admit you.

When you’re ready to write your statement, there are a few ways you can approach it. We’re going to go over a seven-step process so you can keep your thoughts organized and work through a process. Feel free to switch up the method, so it works for you.

Understand the prompt. Before you put pen to paper, make sure you understand the prompt and what is being asked of you. If there’s a specific set of questions you need to respond to, make sure you frame your thinking that way instead of just choosing a topic.

Brainstorm. Think of some ideas and an outline before you start writing. Consider how you can answer the prompt you’re given and what unique experiences you can bring to the table. The more options you have, the better off you’ll be.

Narrow it down. An excellent way to pick your final approach to draft a statement would be to jot down a few sentences for each idea you had. This helps you tell what topic is easiest to write about or what you feel most confident. No matter how you narrow down your ideas, you need to settle on the strongest one to convey your qualifications.

Start with an intro. Once you’re ready to write, you’ll want to write your opening paragraph first. This is a chance for you to introduce yourself and let people know who you are. Try to keep this paragraph short since it’s just an intro, and you’ll have more space to get into your qualifications in the next paragraph.

Write about your qualifications. When you write about your skills, make sure you align them with the job description or the program’s goals or university.

You can expand this section to a few paragraphs (if word count allows) and be sure to cover your achievements, qualifications, skills, talents, goals, and what you can bring to the program or organization.

One to three body paragraphs should suffice, with scholarship and graduate school personal statements being the longest of the bunch, and job personal statements being the shortest.

Sum up your argument. Your statement is a persuasive argument for why the committee should pick you. It should be a compelling summary of your qualifications, and it should show that you have a clear desire to work for the company.

Proofread. Look for any spelling or grammar errors and check to make sure your writing is clear and concise. Cut out anything that doesn’t fit or help paint a good picture of what kind of student or employee you are. You might want to show your draft to a few people to ensure everything sounds right.

No matter what approach you take to writing your statement, a few things hold. We’ll give you some tips to make your statement stand out from the rest.

Write to your audience. Chances are you have a good idea of who will be reading your application and personal statement, so try to gear your writing toward them. Think of what will persuade or impress them and incorporate that into your writing.

Stay truthful. It might be tempting to exaggerate the truth or smudge a little bit, but make sure you stay truthful. If you claim to have skills or experience that you don’t have and land the job, it might be pretty easy to tell that your writing doesn’t exactly align with your experience.

Tell a story. If you can, try to weave your narrative into a story. Not only will it be more engaging for your reader, but it will also show if you can use your skill to create a story. It doesn’t need to be elaborate, but tying everything together into a narrative will impress your readers.

Use your voice. To make your statement more personal and unique, you should write in your voice. Don’t try to copy examples of statements you find or let your editor drown out what makes you unique. Make sure you keep your personality and qualifications front and center since it’s a personal statement.

Get specific. Instead of generally talking about skills you have, find ways to show your reader when you used those skills. Being specific and giving examples will make your argument more compelling and show your reader that you’re a master.

Use simple language. Since personal statements are so short, it’s not the time for long and complex sentences. Keep it concise and easy to read. You don’t want to risk confusing your reader since committees usually have a few minutes to consider your candidacy, and you don’t want to lose their attention.

Sometimes, especially during the brainstorm process, it can help to ask yourself questions to get your mind focused. These questions can help realize what you want to write in your personal statement.

Some questions you can ask yourself include:

“Why am I interested in this application? What about it makes me want to apply?”

“What are my strengths and weaknesses?”

“What type of work gets me excited and deeply engaged?”

“What is my life story and how does it relate to this application?”

“Where do I want to go?”

“Who do I want to be?”

“What have I learned from my past?”

“How can I explain my past experiences?”

“How would my friends and family describe me to a stranger?”

“What obstacles have I overcome and how does it make me who I am today?”

Asking yourself questions like these will open up your mind to new ideas on how to write your personal statement.

You may need to write a personal statement for a university, scholarship, or job application.

University application. When you’re writing a personal statement for a school application, you’ll usually have a few paragraphs to get your point across. These prompts tend to be more open-ended and give you a chance to explain why you want to attend that school, how you align with their program, and why you are an excellent fit for the school’s culture.

A personal statement for a graduate program needs to be much sharper and more focused. At this point in your education, you’re expected to know precisely where you’d like to turn your academic focus and be able to communicate that efficiently.

Scholarship application. When you need to write a personal statement for a grant or scholarship application, you want to make sure you align your values and purpose with the providers. These can be tricky to write, but they’re like a careful balance between personal statements for school and work.

Job application. For work-related personal statements, you’ll want to focus on your skills and qualifications more than your personality. Employers are more concerned with how you can meet their skill requirements. Professional personal statements tend to be shorter, so there’s less space to talk about anything but your qualifications.

Here are two examples of shorts personal statement for graduate program applications:

From the moment I stepped into the lab, smelled the clean scent of fresh lab coats, and saw the beakers glistening under the light, I felt an excitement to learn that hasn’t left me since. Each time I enter the lab, I feel the same flutter of my heart and a sense of purpose. I want to continue to chase this feeling while contributing to a broader scientific knowledge catalog, which I know the Graduate Biology Program at City University will allow me to do. I want to continue the research I started in college on communicable diseases while gaining a critical education. City University’s program emphasizes in-class and hands-on learning, a perfect combination for my learning style.
As a graduate of State University with a B.S. in Biology, I have the foundation to build my knowledge and experience. While at State University, I worked in a lab researching the efficacy of a new flu vaccine. There, I managed other student researchers, worked as a liaison between the professor running the lab and students and managed the data reports. I am ready to bring my extensive experience to City University classrooms while learning from my peers. I am eager to begin the coursework at City University, and I believe I am uniquely prepared to contribute to the campus culture and research efforts. I look forward to stepping into City University’s lab in the fall and feeling the familiar excitement that drives me to pursue a graduate program and learn more about public health.

If you need to write a professional personal statement, here’s a sample you can model yours after:

As a recent graduate of State University with a B.A. in Communications, I am prepared to take what I have learned in the classroom and bring my work ethic and go-getter attitude to ABC Company. I believe that I have the skills and experience to excel as a Marketing Coordinator from my first day. My classes in Digital Communication, Social Media Marketing, and Business Management and my work as Outreach Chair of the university newspaper have prepared me to take on responsibilities as I learn more about the field. I also believe that my dedication to animal welfare aligns with the ABC Company’s goal of finding loving homes for all of their foster pets and makes me especially interested in this position.

What do I write in a personal statement?

A personal statement should include an introduction, your relevant skills/experiences, and your goals. You want to keep your personal statement relevant for the program or job in question. Make sure to show your passion and indicate what you’d like to do with the degree or opportunity.

How do you start off a personal statement?

Start your personal statement by introducing yourself. Give a brief snapshot of your background that also describes why you’re passionate about this field or area of study in particular. Another powerful way to start off a personal statement is with a significant accomplishment that immediately speaks to your relevant skill set and experience.

What exactly is a personal statement?

A personal statement is a brief statement that sums up your qualifications. A personal statement is a brief written document that university admissions boards, scholarship programs, and sometimes hiring managers require from applicants. A personal statement’s purpose is to show the reader that you are qualified, fully invested in the aims of the program, and have plans for what you would do if granted the opportunity.

How do you write a 500-word personal statement?

To write a 500-word personal statement, start by writing without worrying about the word count. If your personal statement is too long, look for sentences that include skills, experiences, or qualifications that aren’t strictly related to the requirements or aims of the program/job you’re applying for and remove them.

If your personal statement is too short, go back to the program, scholarship, or job description. Make note of the preferred experiences and required skills. For example, if you’ve included a skill in your personal statement without experience to back it up, consider adding a brief story that shows you putting that skill into action.

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Amanda is a writer with experience in various industries, including travel, real estate, and career advice. After taking on internships and entry-level jobs, she is familiar with the job search process and landing that crucial first job. Included in her experience is work at an employer/intern matching startup where she marketed an intern database to employers and supported college interns looking for work experience.

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Personal Statement Writing

Personal Statement Examples

Cathy A.

10+ Personal Statement Examples to Elevate Your Application

Personal Statement Examples

People also read

How to Write a Personal Statement - Easy Tips & Examples

A Complete Guide to a Perfect Personal Statement Format

Common App Personal Statement Prompts - 2024

Crafting an impactful personal statement can be challenging, leaving you uncertain about how to effectively showcase your unique qualities.

The fear of self-doubt and anxiety can hinder your chances of securing academic or professional opportunities.

But don't worry! MyPerfectWords.com has come up with a solution.

This guide provides carefully curated personal statement examples, expert insights, and practical tips to help you create a persuasive and authentic narrative. 

Whether you're a seasoned applicant or a novice, our resource empowers you to stand out and seize opportunities aligned with your ambitions.

Let’s get started.

Arrow Down

  • 1. An Overview of Personal Statement Writing
  • 2. Personal Statement Examples For Students
  • 3. Winning Personal Statement Examples Across Diverse Fields
  • 4. Tips For Writing An Effective Personal Statement

An Overview of Personal Statement Writing

A personal statement is a concise and focused essay that individuals typically submit as part of their college, scholarship, or job applications. 

This document serves as a platform for candidates to express their unique qualities, experiences, aspirations, and achievements. 

Its primary purpose is to provide a clear and compelling narrative, allowing the reader to gain insight into the applicant's character, motivations, and qualifications. 

A well-crafted personal statement can distinguish an applicant from others, making it a critical component of the selection process.

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What Should A Personal Statement Include?

A well-structured personal statement should include several key elements:

  • Introduction: Begin with a strong and engaging opening that hooks the reader's attention.
  • Personal Story: Share your personal experiences and anecdotes that highlight your journey, challenges, and growth.
  • Academic and Professional Background: Mention relevant academic achievements, courses, or work experiences that have shaped your aspirations.
  • Skills and Qualities: Discuss your unique skills, strengths, and personal qualities that make you a suitable candidate.
  • Career Goals: Outline your future aspirations, career objectives, and how they align with the program or job you're applying for.
  • Why You're a Good Fit: Explain why you're an ideal fit for the program or job, emphasizing how your skills and aspirations align with the institution's values or the employer's needs.
  • Conclusion: Summarize your key points and reiterate your enthusiasm for the opportunity.

Check out this blog on personal statement format to help you structure your statement with ease.

How Long A Personal Statement Should Be?

The ideal length of a personal statement varies depending on the specific requirements set by the institution or employer. 

However, a general guideline is to aim for a statement that is around 500 to 700 words or roughly one to two pages. 

It's important to follow any length limitations provided in the application instructions, as exceeding these limits can reflect negatively on your application. 

Personal Statement Examples For Students

A personal statement for students is a critical component of college and university applications. 

It provides students with an opportunity to present themselves to admission committees, sharing their unique qualities, experiences, and aspirations. 

In this section, we will examine effective personal statements to guide students in presenting themselves convincingly.

My pursuit of a degree in Environmental Science has been fueled by a lifelong passion for conservation and sustainability. I am honored to apply for this Scholarship, which aligns perfectly with my mission to address environmental challenges and promote positive change within our communities.

From a young age, I found solace in the natural world, fostering a deep connection to the environment. This connection has driven me to excel academically while actively participating in various initiatives related to environmental protection. My time spent volunteering at the local wildlife rehabilitation center has been particularly influential, as it allowed me to witness firsthand the impact of human activities on our ecosystem. These experiences solidified my determination to become an environmental scientist and work towards innovative solutions for the preservation of our planet.

This Scholarship would be a critical stepping stone in my academic journey, allowing me to focus more on my coursework and research projects. This support would not only alleviate the financial burden of my education but also empower me to dedicate myself fully to my studies and advocacy efforts.

I am deeply committed to giving back to my community and contributing to a sustainable future. This scholarship would play a pivotal role in enabling me to continue making a meaningful difference through my research and community involvement. I am confident that with this scholarship, I can propel myself closer to my goal of becoming an environmental scientist and advocate.

In closing, I want to express my sincere gratitude for considering my application for this scholarship. Your support will not only assist me in achieving my academic and career objectives but will also reinforce my commitment to environmental stewardship. I look forward to a future where I can actively contribute to the betterment of our environment and inspire others to do the same.

Why This Personal Statement Works

This personal statement is effective for several reasons:

  • Strong Opening: The statement begins with a compelling introduction that immediately grabs the reader's attention. It opens with a clear passion for environmental science, setting the tone for the rest of the statement.
  • Relevance to Scholarship: The writer makes a direct connection between their academic and career aspirations in environmental science. This shows that the applicant has thoroughly researched the scholarship and understands how it aligns with their goals.
  • Personal Story : The statement shares a personal story about volunteering at a wildlife rehabilitation centre. This illustrates a hands-on experience that underscores the writer's commitment to their field of study.
  • Academic and Extracurricular Achievements : The applicant mentions academic achievements, demonstrating a well-rounded commitment to their field of interest. This provides evidence of their dedication and capability.
  • Clear Career Goals : The writer articulates their career goals and how the scholarship will support these aspirations. This clarity and focus make it evident that the scholarship will be put to meaningful use.

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Ever since I was a child, my fascination with the world of computer science has driven my educational and personal pursuits. This passion has fueled my determination to apply for a place in the Computer Science program at Harvard University. With a strong academic foundation and a fervent commitment to technological innovation, I am eager to embark on this transformative educational journey.

My academic journey thus far has been marked by dedication and achievement. Throughout high school, I consistently ranked among the top students in mathematics and science courses. This success culminated in my acceptance into the advanced placement Computer Science program, where I eagerly embraced the challenges and opportunities presented by programming and algorithm development.

Beyond academics, my extracurricular involvement reflects my genuine enthusiasm for computer science. I actively participated in coding competitions, where I honed my problem-solving skills and developed a deep appreciation for the intricacies of software development. My role as a coding club president allowed me to inspire and mentor fellow students, fostering a sense of camaraderie and a shared passion for technology.

Moreover, my determination to make a difference through computer science extends beyond the classroom. I am particularly proud of my involvement in a community project where I collaborated with a team to develop a mobile application that simplified access to local educational resources for underprivileged students. This experience reinforced my belief in the transformative power of technology and its potential to bridge educational gaps.

Choosing Harvard University is a natural extension of my academic and career goals. I am drawn to the university's distinguished faculty, state-of-the-art facilities, and commitment to fostering innovation. The prospect of working with professors and researchers at the forefront of computer science is both exhilarating and motivating.

I am confident that the Computer Science program at Harvard University is the ideal environment for me to develop my skills, explore emerging technologies, and contribute to groundbreaking research. I am eager to embrace the challenges and opportunities that lie ahead and to ultimately make a meaningful impact in the field of computer science.

In conclusion, I am deeply committed to my educational and career aspirations in computer science. I believe that Harvard University is the perfect place to nurture my passion and achieve my goals. I am excited about the prospect of joining your university and contributing to its vibrant academic community.

  • Passion and Clarity : The applicant demonstrates a clear and genuine passion for computer science, which is essential for admissions. They communicate their career goals with clarity, showing a strong sense of purpose.
  • Academic Excellence : The statement highlights the applicant's strong academic performance, which indicates their readiness for the program.
  • Extracurricular Involvement : The applicant's active participation in coding competitions and leadership in a coding club demonstrates their leadership and teamwork abilities.
  • Community Involvement : The mention of a community project underscores the applicant's commitment to using computer science for positive societal impact, aligning with many universities' values.
  • Fit with Harvard : The applicant effectively explains why Harvard University is the right choice for their academic and career goals. This shows they've done their research and understand the unique benefits of the institution.

Check out this blog on personal statement prompts to spark inspiration for crafting your own impactful statement.

Winning Personal Statement Examples Across Diverse Fields

Whether you're seeking admission to a university or competing for a challenging job role, these personal statement examples will provide valuable insights.

Personal Statement Examples For College

Personal Statement Examples For Jobs

Personal Statement Examples For Resume

Personal Statement Examples For Grad School

Personal Statement Examples Cv

Personal Statement Examples For Ugrad

Personal Statement Examples Medical School

Ucas Personal Statement Examples

Law School Personal Statement Examples

Tips For Writing An Effective Personal Statement

Writing an effective personal statement can significantly boost your chances of success in college or university applications. 

Here are some valuable tips to help you craft a compelling personal statement:

  • Understand the Prompt

Carefully read and understand the prompt or essay question provided by the institution. Make sure your personal statement addresses the specific points or questions asked.

  • Be Authentic

Your personal statement should reflect your true self. Avoid exaggerations, and be honest about your experiences and aspirations. Admission committees value authenticity.

  • Tell a Story

Engage your reader by telling a story. Share personal anecdotes that highlight your journey, challenges you've overcome, and personal growth. Stories make your statement more memorable.

  • Highlight Your Strengths

Identify your unique qualities, skills, and experiences that make you a strong candidate. Clearly convey how these strengths align with the program or institution's values.

  • Show, Don't Just Tell

Instead of merely listing qualities, provide examples and evidence of how you've demonstrated these qualities in your academic and extracurricular activities.

  • Address Your Goals

Discuss your academic and career goals. Explain how the program or institution you're applying to will help you achieve these goals and why it's the right fit for you.

  • Keep it Concise

Adhere to any word or page limits provided. A concise, well-structured statement is more likely to engage the reader. Be clear and to the point.

In conclusion, crafting an effective personal statement is a crucial step in your academic journey. 

By following the tips outlined in this blog, you can create a personal statement that sets you apart and enhances your chances of success.

Remember, your personal statement should be authentic, engaging, and tailored to the specific requirements of your chosen institution. Take your time, seek feedback, and ensure it reflects your true self.

If you're looking for professional assistance in crafting a standout personal statement, don't hesitate to reach out to MyPerfectWords.com. 

Our experienced writers can help you create a personalized and persuasive personal statement that reflects your unique qualities and aspirations. 

Don't miss out on this opportunity to make a lasting impression – visit MyPerfectWords.com and get started today! Your future awaits.

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Personal statement examples by subject: complete list

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Take a look at how other students have written their personal statements

When you're writing your university personal statement, a little inspiration can be handy.

On The Student Room, we have hundreds of real personal statements written by students when they applied for university in previous years.

You'll find all of these listed below, in order of subject. 

For more help with writing your personal statement, our personal statement section  is a good place to go. You can also find tips and discussion in the personal statement advice forum .

And don't forget our sister site The Uni Guide , which has expert advice on getting your personal statement sorted.

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Personal Statement Examples That Will Get You Writing

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Whether you're aiming for a job, university program, or scholarship, the value of an effective personal statement is vital to success. However, writing a personal statement that will make your application stand out can be challenging.

This post will help you put your best foot forward by providing examples and tips for crafting your personal statement. By the end, you will be able to write a standout personal statement with confidence.

What is a personal statement?

A personal statement is a written document that gives an overview of who you are, your experiences, achievements, and goals. It is typically required as part of a job, university program, or scholarship application. The purpose of a personal statement is to convince the reader that you are the right candidate for the opportunity by showcasing your strengths, experiences, and aspirations.

The content of a personal statement will vary depending on the context. Still, it generally includes information about your educational and professional background, achievements and accomplishments, skills and strengths, and goals and aspirations. It is an opportunity to highlight your unique qualities and what sets you apart from other applicants.

Personal statements are often limited to a certain word count or page limit, so it is important to be concise and focus on the most relevant information. Additionally, it is important to tailor your statement to the specific opportunity you are applying for, highlighting the skills and experiences most relevant to the role or program.

A well-crafted personal statement can be a powerful tool in the application process, demonstrating your passion, motivation, and suitability for the opportunity.

There are several reasons why you may need to write a personal statement:

  • To apply for a job A personal statement is often required as part of a job application, allowing candidates to showcase their skills, experience, and personality to potential employers.
  • To apply to a university Universities often require a personal statement as part of the application process, which allows the applicant to demonstrate their suitability for the program, their passion for the subject, and their goals for the future.
  • To apply for a scholarship Personal statements are often required for scholarship applications. They allow the applicant to explain why they deserve the scholarship and how they plan to use it to achieve their goals.
  • To promote oneself Personal statements can be used to promote oneself as an expert in a particular field or to showcase one's achievements and experience to a wider audience.

In all of these cases, a personal statement can effectively communicate your strengths and goals and make a compelling case for why you are the right candidate for a particular opportunity.

Why are personal statements important?

Crafting a killer personal statement can elevate your application to new heights! It can set you apart from the crowd and is a powerful tool to showcase your strengths, passion, and unique experiences. By weaving a compelling story about yourself, you help the reader understand what makes you tick and how you are prepared for the opportunity.

Beyond this, a captivating personal statement can provide valuable insights into your personality and values, making you an even more attractive candidate to employers and admissions officers. Trust us - a powerful personal statement is a game-changer for any successful application!

Personal statement examples

It's important to understand what to include in each personal statement. Here are some examples to consider:

Personal statement for a university application

As a passionate programmer and creative problem-solver, I am eager to pursue a degree in computer science and unleash the endless possibilities it offers me. Through this degree, I can acquire the skills and knowledge that will allow me to create meaningful solutions to real-world problems, something I strive for each day. With great excitement, I look forward to furthering my expertise in this field in a university setting and exploring the exciting opportunities ahead.

In high school, I was a dedicated student who took the initiative and maintained a strong work ethic. I earned high grades and actively participated in extracurricular activities such as the Computer Science Club and Robotics Team. My ambition has been to use my knowledge and skills to help build a better future. That is why I am confident that pursuing a career in computer science is the right decision for me.

Personal statement for job application

As a highly motivated and results-oriented professional, I am eager to contribute my skills and experience to an organization that values innovation and teamwork. Throughout my career, I have developed a reputation for being a problem-solver and effective communicator, with a keen eye for detail and the ability to work under pressure.

I have experience leading teams and coordinating tasks to ensure successful outcomes. Additionally, my communication skills enable me to effectively interact with colleagues, vendors, and customers to ensure that projects are completed on time. I am confident that my passion for my work and dedication to excellence will make me a valuable asset to any team.

Personal statement for scholarship application

Receiving this scholarship would be a life-changing opportunity for me. As a first-generation college student, I have faced many obstacles in pursuing my education, but I have never let these challenges hold me back. When my parents told me they could not help pay for my college tuition, I felt a wave of uncertainty wash over me. But I quickly realized that if I worked hard enough and never gave up, I could make my dreams come true.

With this scholarship, I can continue my studies and achieve my goals, including becoming a role model for other students in my community. I am committed to giving back to my community and using my education to impact the world positively.

Tips for crafting a personal statement

While crafting a standout personal statement can seem daunting, with the right guidance, you can create a compelling document that showcases your unique qualities and sets you apart from other applicants. This section will provide tips and strategies to help you write a powerful personal statement that effectively communicates your skills, experiences, and aspirations.

From tailoring your statement to the opportunity to using specific examples and demonstrating authenticity, these tips will help you create a personal statement that makes a lasting impression.

Here are some tips for writing a strong personal statement:

  • Research: Before writing your personal statement, research the opportunity you are applying for. This will help you to understand the requirements and tailor your statement to the specific role or program.
  • Be concise: Personal statements are often limited to a certain word count or page limit, so it is important to be concise and focus on the most relevant information. Ensure each sentence and paragraph adds value and contributes to your overall message.
  • Use specific examples: Specific examples can be used to illustrate your skills and experiences. This will help to bring your statement to life and provide evidence to support your claims.
  • Tailor your statement: Tailor your statement to the specific role or program. Highlight the skills and experiences that are most relevant to the opportunity and demonstrate how they make you a strong candidate.
  • Show, don't tell: Instead of stating that you are a good fit for the opportunity, provide specific examples and evidence to tangibly demonstrate your skills and experience.
  • Be authentic: Be true to yourself and your experiences. Your statement should reflect your personality, values, and motivations and provide insight into who you are.
  • Proofread and edit: Finally, proofread and edit your statement carefully. Check for spelling and grammar errors, and make sure your message is clear and concise. A well-written and error-free personal statement can make all the difference in a competitive application process.

By following these tips, you can create a personal statement that effectively showcases your strengths and makes a compelling case for why you are the ideal candidate for the opportunity. Remember to tailor your statement to the specific requirements of the opportunity, use specific examples to illustrate your achievements and experiences, and be authentic to yourself. With these tips in mind, you'll be well on your way to crafting a powerful personal statement that will help you stand out from the competition.

Unlock your future

Writing a personal statement can be challenging, but it can also be a rewarding experience with the right approach. A well-crafted personal statement can be the key to unlocking exciting new opportunities, whether it's a job, a university program, or a scholarship. Following the tips outlined in this blog post, you can create a personal statement that showcases your strengths, experiences, and aspirations and demonstrates why you are the ideal candidate for the opportunity. Good luck!

Header image by Akira Kaelyn .

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Craft a compelling personal statement with professional editing

Craft a compelling personal statement with professional editing

How to Write a Personal Statement for a Counseling Master’s

Graduate student writing at a desk

Need to write a personal statement for your counseling graduate school application? This guide will help you craft a standout statement by focusing on your unique experiences and aligning them with your program.

Key takeaways

  • A compelling personal statement for a counseling master’s program should narrate personal characteristics, career aspirations, and potential contributions, connecting with the admissions committee beyond academic achievements.
  • The personal statement should follow a clear narrative and provide specific examples from academic, professional and extracurricular experiences to demonstrate your readiness for the program, while demonstrating fit by aligning personal values and goals with the program’s unique offerings.
  • Start early, stay organized, and maintain a professional tone while writing your personal statement; address any weaknesses thoughtfully and avoid common mistakes such as clichés, excessive praise, or misuse of buzzwords.

Understanding the personal statement

The personal statement is your chance to give admissions officers a clear picture of who you are beyond the grades and jobs listed in your transcripts and resume. It’s a narrative essay that details your personality, career aspirations , and potential contributions to the field of mental health counseling. Crafting compelling personal statements is crucial to making a lasting impression on the admissions team. Think of a personal statement as the thing that transforms you from a collection of data points to a memorable portrait for those reviewing your graduate school application.

Key questions to consider before you begin

As you begin the writing process, make some notes of your past experiences. Here are some prompts to help you brainstorm the contents of your essay:

  • What life events made you into the resilient, determined individual you are today?
  • How have experiences in your academic background prepared you for grad school?
  • Have your career goals changed from what they were during your undergraduate education? Why?
  • Has a family member inspired you to take this path, either through their career or personal experiences?
  • Can you pinpoint the spark that ignited your passion for counseling, the moment when you realized that it could be your future career?

As you piece together your narrative, consider how these experiences align with your academic and career goals, as well as the broader impact you envision making through your work.

Essential components of a successful personal statement

Perhaps the most intimidating thing about a graduate school personal statement is knowing that you have a lot to communicate in a relatively short essay. You need to thread your personal background with your aspirations, using examples that encapsulate your commitment, and demonstrating a clear fit for the counseling program you’re aiming to join. But if you make an outline and list all the things you want to mention, you can be sure to properly accentuate your unique strengths and also paint a vivid picture of your potential success.

Crafting a clear narrative

Keep in mind that your narrative is not a full autobiography but a focused reflection of your resilience and empathy and the other corners of your life that have informed your desire to support others as a counselor. Share those poignant moments and insights that underscore your drive and passion for helping other people, and ensure that your narrative communicates not just a series of events, but the values and strengths you bring to the program. Don't forget that the personal essay also provides an opportunity to explain any discrepancies you think might come across in your other application materials such as poor grades or professional experiences in an unrelated field.

Using specific examples

Each assertion about yourself should be backed by solid examples. Specific examples, whether they are from your academic, professional, or recreational experiences, provide the evidence that substantiates your suitability for the graduate program.

Perhaps you’ve delved into personal research on mental health initiatives, or you’ve dedicated time to volunteer work that’s enriched your understanding of community needs. These anecdotes are the good examples that will allow the admissions committee to see beyond your transcripts and test scores, into the heart of your commitment and potential.

Demonstrating program fit

Demonstrating fit with the graduate program requires an understanding of the program’s strengths and a clear articulation of how its offerings align with your career aspirations.

For instance, if you’re drawn to Oklahoma City University’s commitment to social justice within their counseling program , mention how your values and experiences resonate with this ethos. Discussing aspects of a particular program that align with your future plans can distinguish you as a worthwhile applicant, genuinely interested in the unique offerings of the program. Most graduate programs will have full curriculums and faculty listed online. Make note of courses that sound exciting , faculty members who are conducting research projects you're interested in, and program outcome statements that align with your career goals, and find a way to mention them in your statement. By highlighting these specific elements, you show that you have done your research and are genuinely interested in the program.

Key tips for writing a personal statement

As you work on your grad school essay, remember these crucial pointers:

Start early and stay organized

Don't underestimate the time it will take you to write your best personal statement. Take the time to brainstorm, self-reflect, and polish your narrative until it shines with clarity and purpose.

Organization is your compass in this process, helping you navigate deadlines, requirements, and revisions with ease. Keep a keen eye on the specifics, such as word counts, spelling of university names, and formatting, ensuring that your personal statement not only meets expectations but exceeds them.

Addressing weaknesses thoughtfully

While your accomplishments will shine in your personal statement, don’t hesitate to acknowledge the challenges that have intermittently clouded them. Addressing weaknesses such as a low GPA or a challenging phase in your academic journey can actually highlight your resilience and capability for growth.

However, tread thoughtfully. Reflect on whether the personal statement is the right place to discuss these issues, and if so, ensure that the narrative emphasizes your positive qualities and the lessons learned, rather than dwelling on the negatives.

Maintaining a professional tone

A personal statement marred by grammatical errors or colloquialisms can weaken the impression you’re trying to make. Be genuine, be yourself, but remember the context. This document is a professional communication with the admissions committee, and as such, it should reflect the seriousness with which you approach this opportunity. While tools like ChatGPT could help you create an outline or can perform a grammar check on your application, avoid using it to actually write. The best personal statements resonate from their authenticity. Additionally, many graduate programs have tools they use to scan for the use of such technology and may count it against you.

Common mistakes to avoid

Beware of starting with clichés or ending with banalities—your opening and closing lines should be as impactful as the core of your statement. Avoid excessive praise of the field, focusing only on academic achievements, and misusing buzzwords. These common missteps can dilute the authenticity of your narrative and leave the admissions committee underwhelmed. Remember, admissions committees are reading hundreds of personal statements, make yours stand out.

Get help writing your personal statement for Oklahoma City University

For those aiming to be part of Oklahoma City University’s online M.Ed. in Clinical Mental Health Counseling program, rest assured that guidance is available throughout this process. Admissions outreach advisors are at your disposal, ready to guide you through every step of crafting a personal statement that resonates with the program’s ethos and expectations.

Schedule a call to tap into the wealth of knowledge and support that OCU offers. From writing your personal statement, to putting together your letters of recommendation , to preparing for your interview , their expertise can be the beacon that illuminates your path to a successful graduate school application.

Return to Clinical Mental Health Counseling

Complete the form below before proceeding to the application portal.

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Sample Personal Statement Communication

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Stanford Ph.D. Communication

One of the most poignant history lessons I have ever learned was taught to me outside of the classroom on a crowded carpeted floor with other black members of Swarthmore College’s student body. The lights dimmed and the pioneering African-­‐American historian, John Hope Franklin, lectured to us through the medium of a film made more than two decades ago. I listened, fascinated, as he explained how Europe had first appropriated Christianity, the radical religion of North Africa and much of the Arab world. As Christianity took root in Italy through its newly converted emperor, painters and sculptors by edict, as well as by choice, began to depict Biblical stories through what would become masterpieces  of European art. In one of the world’s greatest public relations campaigns, the image of God was anthropomorphized into the person of Christ rather than the message of Jesus of Nazareth.  And Jesus, who must have resembled the bronzed and brunette mestizo of the Palestinian region, instead became a light skinned European. The center of Christianity became Rome, and Christianity began a journey that transformed it from the marginalized religion of the oppressed to the religion of conquerors and imperialists. The use of manipulated images changed the course of history. So effective was this campaign that many Christians today, regardless of ethnic background or nationality, have difficulty picturing God as anything other than a man with pale skin and long, wavy hair.  

This example clearly reveals that the power of history lies with who tells it, or in other words, the wielders of communication.  Franklin’s use of film conveyed an even clearer message – that not only can one study the function of communication  in society, but one can also use its mediums to propagate formal thought and education regarding society’s development.  His piece exemplifies the way in which the academic world provides scholars with space to reflect critically on areas of interest while producing meaningful works that both shape and depict history. This powerful insight led to my decision to pursue a Ph.D. degree in Communication  at Stanford University, a program that provides its students with extensive research skills to examine the media’s influence in contemporary  society. A Ph.D. will allow me to become a scholar-­‐journalist, not only engaging viewers, but actively evaluating my work’s effects and influence—I want to tell a story and understand its impact at the same time.  

The way that stories are told, repeated, modified, and accepted or rejected has always intrigued me. As a 3 rd grader, I led a one-­‐girl petition to replace my elementary school’s old and suspiciously abbreviated history books. In high school, I wrote and directed a play that the principal ultimately censored because she feared its message would trigger a riot among the members of our racially stratified student body. When a group of white students came in blackface to a Halloween party at my putatively liberal college, I captured students’ voices on film and produced a script that depicted the outpouring of 

emotions and frustration from a variety of perspectives. While pursuing my self-­‐designed major in Social Justice, I grew to value the empowering influence of images, words, and even songs in accelerating the progress of social change worldwide, as evidenced in the U.S. Modern Civil Rights Movement and the anti-­‐apartheid struggle in South Africa. In my work as a journalist in public television, I have helped produce news stories that narrate the lives of the poor and disenfranchised.  And I have learned to appreciate the power that communication  has in shaping identity and altering human behavior.   

My academic pursuits have pushed me beyond the confines of my own knowledge and provided me with a framework within which I explore these insights and the effects of communication  in contemporary  society. I can now connect the influence of the media to Antonio Gramsci’s idea that hegemony is not just domination, but the governance of the many by the few with both coercion and consent. My studies have led me to discern the exploitative, revisionist, and consumerist aspects of the entertainment  media and its impact on people’s actions. Today, I find myself struggling with the need for national guidelines in media and the importance of self-­‐policing in a society where information should be free and accessible.  

My senior thesis in college, an ethnography of a small Newark, NJ Protestant congregation,  showed me the centrality of communication  within the Black Church and the church’s institutional impact on its surrounding community. This place of worship sits in the center of a troubled, struggling city where 

its core issues often are marginalized or overlooked by the news media. The media, instead, excessively reports on polarizing faith controversies such as 

sexuality and war, forcing the church to walk a careful line of involvement and outreach. My eyes were opened further to the world of media and politics around me and I began to ask more questions: Where did the line of media and politics blend? In what way did each segment of media— entertainment,  news, mainstream, alternative, documentary—create and generate a nation’s culture and interests, and in what ways did it simply reflect them? 

Currently, I work as a journalist for the Public Broadcasting System’s Emmy Award-­‐winning television show “NOW.” My experience at NOW has given 

me opportunities  to ask questions and expose truths that often are obscured or denied, a skill that I believe will be critical to my work as a scholar. Most recently, I was able to propose and help produce a show about voter disenfranchisement efforts surrounding the latest midterm elections. My time in television has encouraged me to examine the ways that historical events are used in contemporary  entertainment  media to not only reinvent history, but also play out modern conflicts regarding various social issues. For example, I am interested especially in the remakes of films that were incendiary social commentaries  for their time, like “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner” or “The Stepford Wives.” Do their re-­‐articulations attack the political, moral, and ethical intent of the originals? Does contemporary entertainment media attempt to reconstruct history and how does that inform us?  

As I pursue my Ph.D., I will gain the tools to explore these questions and others building upon skills I have already acquired. My undergraduate  major was both self-­‐designed and interdisciplinary,  so I have no doubt that I am prepared for self-­‐directed and multi-­‐faceted study. As a teacher, I created lessons and engaged elementary students in various subjects; it was a position I immensely respected and a role I hope to resume in a university setting. Having already gone through the process of a lengthy research project, I am confident that with support and guidance I will study and write a dissertation that adds to the scholarly field. My interests are complementary  to the areas of focus in your Communication  program, and I look forward to working with the outstanding members of your faculty. Of particular interest to me is the work of Dr. Jon Krosnick, who studies how the presentation of information affects choice and behavior, and Dr. Marcyliena Morgan, who examines the diverse uses of language among people of African descent; their mentorship and research will greatly influence my own. I am ready to participate in and contribute to the process of social change through my work as a professor and scholar. I aspire to teach, write, and produce works that comment critically on the strengths, weaknesses, and hidden truths of our society. There is no better place to begin this tremendous task than in your program, and I hope for the opportunity to do so.  

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40 Philosophy of Education Examples, Plus How To Write Your Own

Learn how to define and share your teaching philosophy.

Short Philosophy of Education Examples Feature

These days, it’s become common for educators to be asked what their personal teaching philosophy is. Whether it’s for a job interview, a college class, or to share with your principal, crafting a philosophy of education can seem like a daunting task. So set aside some time to consider your own teaching philosophy (we’ll walk you through it), and be sure to look at philosophy of education examples from others (we’ve got those too!).

What is a philosophy of education?

Before we dive into the examples, it’s important to understand the purpose of a philosophy of education. This statement will provide an explanation of your teaching values and beliefs. Your teaching philosophy is ultimately a combination of the methods you studied in college and any professional experiences you’ve learned from since. It incorporates your own experiences (negative or positive) in education.

Many teachers have two versions of their teaching philosophy: a long form (a page or so of text) and a short form. The longer form is useful for job application cover letters or to include as part of your teacher portfolio. The short form distills the longer philosophy into a couple of succinct sentences that you can use to answer teacher job interview questions or even share with parents.

What’s the best teaching philosophy?

Here’s one key thing to remember: There’s no one right answer to “What’s your teaching philosophy?” Every teacher’s will be a little bit different, depending on their own teaching style, experiences, and expectations. And many teachers find that their philosophies change over time, as they learn and grow in their careers.

When someone asks for your philosophy of education, what they really want to know is that you’ve given thought to how you prepare lessons and interact with students in and out of the classroom. They’re interested in finding out what you expect from your students and from yourself, and how you’ll apply those expectations. And they want to hear examples of how you put your teaching philosophy into action.

What’s included in strong teaching philosophy examples?

Depending on who you ask, a philosophy of education statement can include a variety of values, beliefs, and information. As you build your own teaching philosophy statement, consider these aspects, and write down your answers to the questions.

Purpose of Education (Core Beliefs)

What do you believe is the purpose of teaching and learning? Why does education matter to today’s children? How will time spent in your classroom help prepare them for the future?

Use your answers to draft the opening statement of your philosophy of education, like these:

  • Education isn’t just about what students learn, but about learning how to learn.
  • A good education prepares students to be productive and empathetic members of society.
  • Teachers help students embrace new information and new ways of seeing the world around them.
  • A strong education with a focus on fundamentals ensures students can take on any challenges that come their way.
  • I believe education is key to empowering today’s youth, so they’ll feel confident in their future careers, relationships, and duties as members of their community.
  • Well-educated students are open-minded, welcoming the opinions of others and knowing how to evaluate information critically and carefully.

Teaching Style and Practices

Do you believe in student-led learning, or do you like to use the Socratic method instead? Is your classroom a place for quiet concentration or sociable collaboration? Do you focus on play-based learning, hands-on practice, debate and discussion, problem-solving, or project-based learning? All teachers use a mix of teaching practices and styles, of course, but there are some you’re likely more comfortable with than others. Possible examples:

  • I frequently use project-based learning in my classrooms because I believe it helps make learning more relevant to my students. When students work together to address real-world problems, they use their [subject] knowledge and skills and develop communication and critical thinking abilities too.
  • Play-based learning is a big part of my teaching philosophy. Kids who learn through play have more authentic experiences, exploring and discovering the world naturally in ways that make the process more engaging and likely to make a lasting impact.
  • In my classroom, technology is key. I believe in teaching students how to use today’s technology in responsible ways, embracing new possibilities and using technology as a tool, not a crutch.
  • While I believe in trying new teaching methods, I also find that traditional learning activities can still be effective. My teaching is mainly a mix of lecture, Socratic seminar, and small-group discussions.
  • I’m a big believer in formative assessment , taking every opportunity to measure my students’ understanding and progress. I use tools like exit tickets and Kahoot! quizzes, and watch my students closely to see if they’re engaged and on track.
  • Group work and discussions play a major role in my instructional style. Students who learn to work cooperatively at a young age are better equipped to succeed in school, in their future careers, and in their communities.

Students and Learning Styles

Why is it important to recognize all learning styles? How do you accommodate different learning styles in your classroom? What are your beliefs on diversity, equity, and inclusion? How do you ensure every student in your classroom receives the same opportunities to learn? How do you expect students to behave, and how do you measure success?

Sample teaching philosophy statements about students might sound like this:

  • Every student has their own unique talents, skills, challenges, and background. By getting to know my students as individuals, I can help them find the learning styles that work best for them, now and throughout their education.
  • I find that motivated students learn best. They’re more engaged in the classroom and more diligent when working alone. I work to motivate students by making learning relevant, meaningful, and enjoyable.
  • We must give every student equal opportunities to learn and grow. Not all students have the same support outside the classroom. So as a teacher, I try to help bridge gaps when I see them and give struggling students a chance to succeed academically.
  • I believe every student has their own story and deserves a chance to create and share it. I encourage my students to approach learning as individuals, and I know I’m succeeding when they show a real interest in showing up and learning more every day.
  • In my classroom, students take responsibility for their own success. I help them craft their own learning goals, then encourage them to evaluate their progress honestly and ask for help when they need it.
  • To me, the best classrooms are those that are the most diverse. Students learn to recognize and respect each other’s differences, celebrating what each brings to the community. They also have the opportunity to find common ground, sometimes in ways that surprise them.

How do I write my philosophy of education?

Think back to any essay you’ve ever written and follow a similar format. Write in the present tense; your philosophy isn’t aspirational, it’s something you already live and follow. This is true even if you’re applying for your first teaching job. Your philosophy is informed by your student teaching, internships, and other teaching experiences.

Lead with your core beliefs about teaching and learning. These beliefs should be reflected throughout the rest of your teaching philosophy statement.

Then, explain your teaching style and practices, being sure to include concrete examples of how you put those practices into action. Transition into your beliefs about students and learning styles, with more examples. Explain why you believe in these teaching and learning styles, and how you’ve seen them work in your experiences.

A long-form philosophy of education statement usually takes a few paragraphs (not generally more than a page or two). From that long-form philosophy, highlight a few key statements and phrases and use them to sum up your teaching philosophy in a couple of well-crafted sentences for your short-form teaching philosophy.

Still feeling overwhelmed? Try answering these three key questions:

  • Why do you teach?
  • What are your favorite, tried-and-true methods for teaching and learning?
  • How do you help students of all abilities and backgrounds learn?

If you can answer those three questions, you can write your teaching philosophy!

Short Philosophy of Education Examples

We asked real educators in the We Are Teachers HELPLINE group on Facebook to share their teaching philosophy examples in a few sentences . Here’s what they had to say:

I am always trying to turn my students into self-sufficient learners who use their resources to figure it out instead of resorting to just asking someone for the answers. —Amy J.

I am always trying to turn my students into self-sufficient learners who use their resources to figure it out instead of resorting to just asking someone for the answers. —Amy J.

My philosophy is that all students can learn. Good educators meet all students’ differentiated learning needs to help all students meet their maximum learning potential. —Lisa B.

I believe that all students are unique and need a teacher that caters to their individual needs in a safe and stimulating environment. I want to create a classroom where students can flourish and explore to reach their full potential. My goal is also to create a warm, loving environment, so students feel safe to take risks and express themselves. —Valerie T.

In my classroom, I like to focus on the student-teacher relationships/one-on-one interactions. Flexibility is a must, and I’ve learned that you do the best you can with the students you have for however long you have them in your class. —Elizabeth Y

I want to prepare my students to be able to get along without me and take ownership of their learning. I have implemented a growth mindset. —Kirk H.

My teaching philosophy is centered around seeing the whole student and allowing the student to use their whole self to direct their own learning. As a secondary teacher, I also believe strongly in exposing all students to the same core content of my subject so that they have equal opportunities for careers and other experiences dependent upon that content in the future. —Jacky B.

My teaching philosophy is centered around seeing the whole student and allowing the student to use their whole self to direct their own learning. As a secondary teacher, I also believe strongly in exposing all students to the same core content of my subject so that they have equal opportunities for careers and other experiences dependent upon that content in the future. —Jacky B.

All children learn best when learning is hands-on. This works for the high students and the low students too, even the ones in between. I teach by creating experiences, not giving information. —Jessica R.

As teachers, it’s our job to foster creativity. In order to do that, it’s important for me to embrace the mistakes of my students, create a learning environment that allows them to feel comfortable enough to take chances, and try new methods. —Chelsie L.

I believe that every child can learn and deserves the best, well-trained teacher possible who has high expectations for them. I differentiate all my lessons and include all learning modalities. —Amy S.

All students can learn and want to learn. It is my job to meet them where they are and move them forward. —Holli A.

I believe learning comes from making sense of chaos. My job is to design work that will allow students to process, explore, and discuss concepts to own the learning. I need to be part of the process to guide and challenge perceptions. —Shelly G.

I believe learning comes from making sense of chaos. My job is to design work that will allow students to process, explore, and discuss concepts to own the learning. I need to be part of the process to guide and challenge perceptions. —Shelly G.

I want my students to know that they are valued members of our classroom community, and I want to teach each of them what they need to continue to grow in my classroom. —Doreen G.

Teach to every child’s passion and encourage a joy for and love of education and school. —Iris B.

I believe in creating a classroom culture of learning through mistakes and overcoming obstacles through teamwork. —Jenn B.

It’s our job to introduce our kids to many, many different things and help them find what they excel in and what they don’t. Then nurture their excellence and help them figure out how to compensate for their problem areas. That way, they will become happy, successful adults. —Haley T.

Longer Philosophy of Education Examples

Looking for longer teaching philosophy examples? Check out these selections from experienced teachers of all ages and grades.

  • Learning To Wear the Big Shoes: One Step at a Time
  • Nellie Edge: My Kindergarten Teaching Philosophy
  • Faculty Focus: My Philosophy of Teaching
  • Robinson Elementary School: My Teaching Philosophy
  • David Orace Kelly: Philosophy of Education
  • Explorations in Higher Education: My Teaching Philosophy Statement
  • University of Washington Medical School Faculty Teaching Philosophy Statements

Do you have any philosophy of education examples? Share them in the We Are Teachers HELPLINE Group on Facebook!

Want more articles and tips like this be sure to subscribe to our newsletters to find out when they’re posted..

Many educators are being asked to define their teaching philosophy. Find real philosophy of education examples and tips for building yours.

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Collage of teaching portfolio examples, including traditional digital portfolios

15 Inspiring Teaching Portfolio Examples (Plus How To Create Your Own)

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How to Write a Professional Resume Summary? [+Examples]

Kaja Jurčišinová — Staff Writer

Do you want to land more job interviews? The easiest way to achieve this is by attracting a recruiter’s attention straight away by summarizing the highlights of your career right at the start of your resume — in a section called the resume summary. 

The purpose of this resume section, which is also known as a professional summary or resume statement, is to create a good first impression. It sums up your work experience , skills, and achievements into a short and concise sales pitch where you are the product. 

Do it well, and your future employers will be more inclined to read the rest of your resume.

Without further ado, let’s show you how to write an exceptional professional summary that will not only get you to more job interviews but will also help you land a job. 

This guide will show you:

What is a professional summary?

Why do you need a professional summary, how to write a professional summary.

  • What to do when you don’t have any experience in the field?
  • What are a resume objective and a resume profile?
  • Examples of professional summaries from real professionals.

TL;DR video guide: How to write a professional summary for a resume 

A professional summary gives the hiring manager a quick overview of your skills and achievements without them having to dive into the rest of your resume. It sits at the top of your resume, beneath your name and contact information. You can think of it as a teaser for the rest of your resume.

It should sum up your top skills, experiences, and achievements as they pertain to the job description.

Take a look at the sample below to see what it looks like in practice: 

The professional summary section is also known as a:  

  • Resume summary 
  • Qualifications summary 
  • Resume statement 
  • Heading statement 
  • Competencies 
  • Career summary
  • Experience summary
  • Personal statement 

However, don’t mistake a professional summary for a resume objective or profile . We’ll discuss the differences between them later in this guide. 

How long should a professional summary be? 

Generally speaking, a resume summary should be quite short. The most common length is 3-5 sentences or bullet points. It shouldn't be longer than 5-6 concise bullet points , but it also shouldn't be shorter than 2 bullet points. 

You can also replace the first bullet point with a short introductory paragraph that includes your job title, years of experience, and specialization. 

professional summary on a resume

While many people still don't include the resume profile section in their resumes, it's a mistake. But why is it a mistake?

  • You want to grab the recruiter's attention from the get-go.
  • You'll make their life a bit easier because you'll immediately tell them who you are.

The thing is, recruiters are busy people , they go through dozens, sometimes hundreds of resumes before they can find a few qualified candidates. 

Do you know what this means? Shortcuts. At first, recruiters will be skimming resumes in search of specific keywords and phrases that align with what the company is searching for.

That’s why you want to include the best resume summary you can come up with because a good summary section consists of nothing but these juicy bite-size phrases and keywords that a recruiter can spot at a glance. 

In short, a professional summary allows you to turn a recruiter's time limitation into an advantage. 

Christy's word of advice

While recruiters are indeed busy, did you know that the information that recruiters only give each resume 6 seconds of their time isn't true? 

“This one's a little bit of a myth. It takes about six seconds to screen the resume for the key information that I'm looking for, such as location, summary, keywords, or if there's a skills section. Within this time frame, I should be able to get a feel for who you are and what you're looking for. But it's mainly about six seconds for me to pick out the basic information I need. It doesn't mean that I'm going to spend just six seconds on it or that I won't continue reading after. ” —   Christy Morgan , Kickresume's Resident HR Expert

resume summary kickresume

As we said before, a good professional summary should compel an employer to read the next section of your resume — that’s all. If it manages to do that, then it has accomplished its purpose. 

However, doing this is easier said than done, as it can be tricky to cram the most exciting bits of your career into a 3-5 bullet points summary. 

Luckily, there are a few tips and tricks you can use to craft an impressive resume summary.

Before you start writing:

  • Write other resume sections, and then write your professional summary last. It’s surprisingly easy once you’ve already written other sections of your resume. All you have to do is cherry-pick the most impressive facts and stats.
  • Pick the essential keywords from the job listing, so you can tailor your summary. Start with the job listing that made you apply for the job. Carefully reread it and find the most important keywords. These are the nouns or phrases that best describe the job position, related skills, as well as the ideal candidate. Before you begin to write, think about how they intersect with your own skills and experiences. In this way, you also have a higher chance to get through the ATS systems which companies use .

Once you start writing:

  • In the first bullet point, write your professional title. Don’t forget to add the number of years of experience. You want to communicate your professional identity immediately. You can also write it in bold. It can look something like this: “Certified Project Management Professional with over 4 years of experience”.
  • Pick the 3-4 most impressive parts of your resume and reword them into snappy bullet points. Tease your potential employer into reading further. Did you earn a recognition for the best customer service? Or hit 95% of sales targets for five consecutive years? These are the things that deserve a mention at the top of your resume!
  • Translate each achievement into numbers. Each bullet point should contain at least one piece of quantifiable data. Use percentages, numbers, or impressive sales figures. It gives the hiring manager a better idea of how you performed in your previous jobs. Numbers attract attention. Take advantage of that.
  • Sum up what you have to offer. Instead of saying what you want, keep in mind what they want. Make clear what values you can bring to the company. Look for common threads in your work history and for skills that apply most to the job.

How to use keywords in a resume summary

A professional summary can do more than catch the attention of the recruiter. It can also make your resume more ATS-friendly. 

It's a great place where you can squeeze in one or two ATS-friendly keywords , and it will still look natural.

Such keywords can be your industry-relevant hard skills, previous job positions, notable clients, certificates and courses from notable institutions, or a note-worthy university (if you recently finished your degree). 

Moreover, you should add keywords and relevant skills from the job listing.

Don't get too creative with the heading, though. While replacing the professional summary headline with “Snapshot” sounds great, ATS doesn't know what it means and therefore wouldn't recognize it.

Pro tip: Remember, while it's important to incorporate keywords into your resume summary, it's crucial to ensure these keywords align with your abilities and experiences. The ATS might shortlist your resume, but the hiring manager will quickly realize in an interview if those keywords were merely resume filler. Always maintain honesty and authenticity while drafting your summary.

summary resume example

Professional resume summary examples for most common careers

Now that you know the ins and outs of writing a resume summary, here are a few examples that can inspire you when writing your summary:

Professional summary example for customer service

Performance-driven and motivated customer service rep offering 4+ years of relevant experience. Eager to join the Techia team and contribute to the growth of the company. In the previous role, the ability to make customers comfortable and relaxed allowed for 98% customer service survey results and had 25% more sales than the average employer. 

Professional resume summary example for retail

Dedicated and hard-working storekeeper with a Business Administration degree. Eager to bring my strong attention to detail and accuracy to J&R inc. Adept at communicating with vendors and suppliers, coordinating various business operations, and maintaining documents and files in order. In the past jobs brought an extra $50k of sales per quarter and increased customer satisfaction by 20%. 

Professional summary example for nursing resume

Motivational and resourceful Orthopedic Nurse with 10 years of experience with in-depth knowledge in trauma recovery, aggressive pain management techniques, and post-surgical recovery. Especially proficient in providing external fixation care and continuous motion therapy along with neuromuscular status monitoring. Committed to work as an orthopedic nurse for people who are struggling with mobility issues due to accidental injuries and degenerative disease affecting bones and muscles.

Professional summary example for administrative assistant

Self-driven and accurate Executive Assistant skilled at performing various office/administrative duties, such as coordinating meetings, maintaining calendar and schedule, filing documents, and managing company correspondence. Highly self-motivated with a solid work ethic and multitasking abilities.

Professional summary example for data analyst

A graduate in Information Systems with two years of hands-on data analytics experience. Passionate about working with large amounts of data and to turn this data into information, information into insight and insight into business decisions. I also have a keen interest in the field of data visualization and am fascinated by the power to compress complex datasets into approachable and appealing graphics.

Professional summary example for warehouse worker

Hard-working and dedicated Warehouse Worker with 2+ years of extensive experience in inspecting incoming shipments, preparing and processing orders, and performing various administrative duties. The Employee of the Month Award winner with a strong attention to detail and accuracy and determination to achieve exceptional results. Offers excellent time management skills and important ability to work independently or in a team.

Professional summary example for receptionist 

Customer-oriented and performance-driven Front Desk Assistant skilled at performing various administrative tasks, improving all office processes and procedures, and providing support to Office Managers. Great communicator with a Business Administration degree from a well-known university and an exceptional ability to remain calm in stressful situations. Possess well-developed communication skills and excellent time management abilities.

Resume summary example for management

A Project Manager with 16 years of experience in IT projects. Responsible for the management of teams of up to 15 direct and 7 indirect employees. Has High level knowledge in project execution using best practices of waterfall and agile methodologies. High level knowledge of Jupyter Notebook, MS Project, MS Excel, MS Word. 

Professional summary example for project manager

Logistics & Planning PMO for Anheuser-Busch InBev with +7 years of experience in Supply Chain Operations & Project Management. Lived and worked for ABI in 6 cities in past years, managed +300 direct & indirect employees and +0.5 billion BRL over the years. At ABI experienced the routines in breweries operations & urban distribution. As Project Manager build the Zone Logistics Project area for ABI LAN, being responsible for 4.0 Supply Chain, integrating the technologies WMS, YMS, TMS and Tracking.

Resume summary example for stay-at-home mother

Performance-driven and knowledgeable Stay At Home Mother skilled at conducting detailed market research, developing new sales tools, creating reports, and promoting products and services. Certified Marketing Management Professional with an extensive knowledge of multiple marketing software programmes, great communication skills, and excellent teamwork abilities. Currently looking for any Marketing related remote part-time job.

Professional summary example for student

Self-driven and knowledgeable computer science student with demonstrated experience in developing user-friendly software applications, coding and testing features, and providing engineering support. Oracle Certified Professional with extensive knowledge of multiple programming languages and software development tools, excellent problem-solving skills, and ability to perform well in a team.

fresh graduate resume summary example

How to write a resume summary if you're a fresh graduate/student?

If you’re a student or a fresh graduate, you probably don’t have much to brag about in your resume yet.

But that’s true only to some extent. Even as an entry-level candidate, you already have at least some experience and skills. You just have to find the right way to articulate them.

What’s more, it’s quite likely that the other candidates are just as inexperienced as you are. After all, experienced professionals rarely apply for entry-level positions. 

Because of that, your primary goal is to stand out and make the employer remember you . And you can do that even if your experience is limited.

It’s not like you’ve just spent most of your life at school and learned nothing. You just need to understand how your studies intersect with the job’s requirements.

 Here’s how you can write your professional resume summary as a student/fresh graduate:

  • State your field of study, degree, and GPA (if it’s above 3.0).
  • Mention relevant skills gained in internships, part-time jobs, and volunteer work.
  • Add related coursework or school projects.
  • Also, try to translate your most notable achievements into numbers. Maybe you were on the student council. You can mention how you received 800 votes and helped organize 5 large school events that were attended by 2,000 students.

In the end, a fresh graduate resume summary should look a bit like this: 

Hired by Bupa — Business Administration Intern

  • An adaptable and responsible graduate seeking an entry-level position in the Business Analytics market, Business Consultancy or Financial market.
  • My double degree in Business and Law and my previous job as a financial controller have provided me with a well-rounded background and enabled me to develop an analytical/logical approach to tasks, software skills, and the ability to work under pressure.
  • In short, I am reliable, hard-working with strong attention to detail and eager to learn about new technologies and business issues. I am able to work well both on my own initiative and as a part of a team. I’m also able to travel abroad.

How to write a resume summary as an experienced professional?

If you have 10 to 15 years of professional experience under your belt, you’ve probably developed a long list of job-related accomplishments. Your qualifications summary is the ideal place to showcase the most impressive of them. 

On the other, with that extent of experience, it may be quite challenging to pick and choose the right information for your professional summary. 

So what should you do? 

  • Start by carefully rereading the job advertisement.
  • Highlight any skills you already possess that match this job offer.
  • See if you can think of any past accomplishments that show how you successfully used those skills in your previous job.

For instance, are you an experienced sales and customer service professional? Sell it. Mention how you developed strategies that resulted in an over 15 % increase in new customers. Or how your rewards program reached a customer success rate of over 45 %. Numbers can be much more persuasive than words . 

Also, always remember to use action words and relevant keywords.

Here’s a professional summary resume example from an experienced professional: 

HubSpot — Director of Business Development Resume Summary Example

  • Passionate Business Amplifier.
  • Thrives in complex market segment entry and sales and marketing launch plans for technical products and services. Founder of the highly-impactful "HubSpot for Veterans" initiative. 
  • Proven Growth Consultant and Entrepreneurial Coach for over 200 organizations. Advocate of lean startup and data-backed strategy. 
  • Leadership spans career with direct application towards startups, Techstar accelerators, corporate business development, and government. ROI-focused relationship builder.
  • Lifelong teacher and learner: Startup Institute, Techstarts, HubSpot Partner programs.

How to write a professional summary if you’re changing careers?

As a career changer , try to show how your past experience relates to the position you’re applying for or how it can help your future employer grow.

Are you a software developer who wants to work with a new programming language, let’s say Python? You can mention how you’ve already developed 7 mobile apps using JavaScript and HTML. Even something as small as completing a Python online course on CodeAcademy can work wonders.

But if you still feel like you don’t have any relevant job experience, consider writing a resume objective instead. Instead of past achievements and experiences, it highlights your transferable skills and motivation. Moreover, it explains why you seek to switch to a different industry.

On the other hand, make sure that you have absolutely no other solution, as a resume summary always makes a better impression than a resume objective . To learn more about a resume objective just scroll to the following chapter. 

Here’s an example of a professional summary for someone changing careers:

  • Marketing professional with over three years of experience in digital advertising, aiming to transition from marketing to human resources
  • Certified Human Resources Assistant with a working knowledge of all software programs needed for the position such as Bamboo HR and Zenefits.
  • Was in charge of recruiting and supervising summer interns and co-managing marketing budgets.
  • Won the Employee of the Month Award for completing all assigned tasks and projects in a timely manner.

How to write a professional summary for a resume with no work experience? 

A lot of people with no work experience default to writing a resume objective because they think they have nothing to summarize.

However, this usually ends up backfiring as the resume objective brings little to the table. That’s because the resume objective’s main focus is on you as opposed to a professional summary which focuses on solving the needs of a company.

Also, writing a summary objective can make you appear more inexperienced than you truly are. 

Instead, as someone with no work experience, you can write a professional summary by including: 

  • Your education level;
  • Adjectives that emphasize your work ethic (such as competent, decisive, and accountable);
  • Relevant skills gained at school, volunteering , or internships; 
  • Professional hobbies (for example if applying for an IT position, include that app side project you worked on). 

In addition, if you have volunteered or interned, know that regardless of whether they were paid or not, they're still considered work experience. As the skills and knowledge gained as a volunteer or intern can be quite valuable to an employer. 

With that said, here’s an example of a professional summary for someone with no work experience:

People United Foundation – Fundraiser Volunteer 

  • Resourceful and talented fundraiser who uses new forms of technology and existing techniques to help raise money for organizations and groups. 
  • Experienced in raising funds for various charitable and nonprofit institutes. 
  • Adept at researching and presenting an array of innovative fundraising ideas to a variety of donor audiences. 
  • Keen negotiator with exceptional communication time management and networking abilities. 

what is a resume objective

Resume summary vs resume objective and resume profile

While these terms are often interchangeable, a resume summary, a resume objective, and a resume profile are all slightly different things. Scroll below to see how. 

What is a resume objective?

First of all, a resume objective isn't the same thing as a resume summary. They share several common features but each serves a different purpose.

Like a resume summary, a resume objective also sits at the top of your resume. Though, it’s a bit shorter — usually about one to two sentences long . 

The biggest difference is that instead of your past accomplishments, it details your future goals.

Although a resume objective might not help hiring managers decide whether you’re qualified enough to solve their company’s problems, it may help you shift their attention away from your lack of experience.

With that said, resume objectives are a bit old-fashioned as they used to be more common in past. So it should only be written as a last resort.

resume objective sample

What is a resume profile?

Most people think that the resume profile and resume summary are the same exact thing. And they aren't that wrong. 

However, there are some slight differences between the two. 

A resume profile tends to be a little longer than a resume summary. Still, you should try to keep it under 500 characters. Additionally, while a resume summary is simply a condensed version of your resume placed at the top of it, a resume profile focuses more on your professional accomplishments and successes. 

Still — a resume summary and a resume profile are basically the same thing. So don't worry too much about the difference between the two. Just make sure you'll include either of them in your resume. 

Final tips and tricks

We've already mentioned almost everything you need to write an effective professional summary. These are some of the final tips that didn't fit anywhere else in this guide:

  • Emphasize proven experience. Instead of simply listing your skills , mention your previous accomplishments. For example, it’s much more impactful to say that you had your articles published in Forbes than to plainly claim that you’re a skilled writer.
  • Try to avoid using the word “I” . It's not really necessary, especially if you write in bullet points. 
  • Structure it well. Take it from a professional writer — bullet points are a godsend when you need to structure your text clearly without giving it too much effort. Not only will they naturally order your resume statement into clearly delineated logical parts, but they'll also make it look good and read well. Also, make sure to write your current job title in bold.
  • Keep it short. Your summary shouldn’t be longer than 5 short sentences (or bullet points). Having a long summary sort of defeats the point of having a resume summary at all. Don’t add random things. The key is to be specific.
  • Read it after yourself. When you’re finished writing, read through your summary from the perspective of a hiring manager, asking “Why should we hire you?” .

Oh, and if you want to turn your LinkedIn profile into a polished resume with just one click, we've got you covered.

How to write a resume summary?

Write your professional summary last. It’s surprisingly easy once you’ve already written other sections of your resume. In the first bullet point, include your job title and years of experience. Then cherry-pick the most impressive achievements and cram them into 4–5 bullet points.

There are some slight differences between a resume profile and a resume summary. A resume profile tends to be a little longer than a resume summary. Still, you should try to keep it under 500 characters. A resume profile also focuses more on your professional accomplishments and successes than a resume summary. 

Kaja Jurčišinová — Staff Writer

Kaja Jurčišinová

Kaja Jurcisinova is a fresh graduate and a junior copywriter at Kickresume. Kaja completed her undergraduate degree in Art History at the University of St Andrews in 2018 and graduated with a Master’s in Arts and Culture from the University of Groningen in 2021. She was an intern at multiple cultural institutions across Europe, including the Dutch Museum Association in Amsterdam, the Matter of Art Biennale in Prague, and the European Cultural Centre in Venice. At the moment, she resides in Visby on the Swedish island of Gotland.

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How to put your education on a resume [+examples], how to describe your work experience on a resume [+examples], let your resume do the work..

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New IRS, Treasury guidance focuses on “basis shifting” transactions used by partnerships

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FS-2024-21, June 17, 2024

WASHINGTON — The Department of the Treasury and the Internal Revenue Service today issued guidance on the inappropriate use of partnership rules to inflate the basis of the underlying assets without causing any meaningful change to the economics of their business.

The guidance issued today by Treasury and the IRS follows work by IRS exam teams, which have seen repeated instances of abusive basis-shifting taking place in sophisticated maneuvers by related-party partnerships.

As part of the larger IRS compliance efforts, the guidance issued today relates to certain partnership transactions that the IRS believes generate inappropriate tax benefits.

Generally, these transactions may employ several steps over a period of years and use sophisticated tax technology to ensure that little or no tax is paid while large amounts of tax basis is “stripped” from certain assets and shifted to other assets to generate tax benefits. In essence, these deals allow increased depreciation deductions or reduced gain on the sale of an asset with little or no substantive economic consequence.

These basis shifting transactions targeted in the new guidance generally fall into three groups:

Transfer of partnership interest to related party: In this transaction, a partner with a low share of the partnership’s “inside” tax basis and a high “outside” tax basis transfers the interest in a tax-free transaction to a related person or to a person who is related to other partners in the partnership. This related-party transfer generates a tax-free basis increase to the transferee partner’s share of “inside” basis.

Distribution of property to a related party: In this transaction, a partnership with related partners distributes a high-basis asset to one of the related partners that has a low outside basis. After this, the distributee partner reduces the basis of the distributed asset and the partnership increases the basis of its remaining assets. The related partners can arrange this transaction so that the reduced tax basis of the distributed asset will not adversely impact the related partners, while the basis increase to the partnership’s retained assets can produce tax savings for the related parties.

Liquidation of related partnership or partner: In this transaction, a partnership with related partners liquidates and distributes (1) a low-basis asset that is subject to accelerated cost recovery or for which the parties intend to sell to a partner with a high outside basis and (2) a high-basis property that is subject to longer cost recovery (or no cost recovery at all) or for which the parties intend to hold to a partner with a low outside basis. Under the partnership liquidation rules, the first related partner increases the basis of the property with a shorter life or which is held for sale while the second related partner decreases the basis of the long-lived or non-depreciable property, with the result that the related parties generate or accelerate tax benefits.

To help address these areas, Notice 2024-54 PDF announces two sets of upcoming regulations:

  • The first set of regulations would require partnerships to treat basis adjustments arising from covered transactions in a way that would restrict them from deriving inappropriate tax benefits from the basis adjustments.
  • The second set of regulations would provide rules to ensure clear reflection of the taxable income and tax liability of a consolidated group of corporations when members of the group own interests in partnerships. The notice further announces that that the covered transactions governed by these regulations would involve basis adjustments under Internal Revenue Code sections 732, 734(b) and/or 743(b).

Basis shifting identified as Transactions of Interest (TOI)

The proposed regulations Treasury and IRS issued today identify certain basis shifting transactions by partnerships as reportable Transactions of Interest (TOI).

“These proposed regulations will provide the IRS with information about potentially abusive partnership transactions involving basis shifting leading to significant tax benefits without causing any meaningful change to the economics of their business,” IRS Commissioner Danny Werfel said. “Our teams are seeing these very problems today. There are cases at either the litigation or the audit stage that involve transactions that are the same or similar to those described as transactions of interest in the proposed regulations issued today.”

The proposed regulations identify related-party partnership basis adjustment transactions and substantially similar transactions as a TOI – a type of reportable transaction. These proposed regulations would affect partnerships that are participating in the identified transactions by distributing partnership property or by transferring an interest in the partnership transferred in an identified transaction. The affected taxpayers and material advisors would be subject to the disclosure requirements for reportable transactions.

The TOIs generally involve positive basis adjustments of $5 million or more under subchapter K of the Internal Revenue Code – specifically sections 732(b) or (d), 734(b) or 743(b) – to which no corresponding tax is paid. The transactions would include either a distribution of partnership property to a partner that is related to one or more other partners in the partnership, or the transfer of a partnership interest in which the transferor is related to the transferee, or the transferee is related to one or more of the partners.

In these transactions, the basis increase allows related parties an opportunity for decreasing their taxable income through increased cost recovery deductions or through decreasing their taxable gain (or increasing their taxable loss) on the subsequent transfer of the property in a transaction in which gain or loss is recognized in whole or in part.

The proposed regulations would affect the partnership and the partners that are participating in the identified transactions, including by receiving a distribution of partnership property, transferring a partnership interest or receiving a partnership interest.

“You can see by these descriptions that these involve complex arrangements where taxable income can be shielded from scrutiny,” Werfel said. “These proposed regulations demonstrate the agency’s commitment to use new resources to unpack complicated noncompliance by partnerships and other high-income taxpayers, which is an important part of our efforts to bring more fairness to the tax system.”

Revenue Ruling informs the public that IRS will challenge basis stripping

Revenue Ruling 2024-14 PDF notifies taxpayers and advisors using partnerships that engage in three variations of these transactions that the IRS will apply the codified economic substance doctrine to challenge inappropriate basis adjustments and other aspects of these transactions.

Under Revenue Ruling 2024-14, the IRS announces that the economic substance doctrine will be raised in cases where related parties:

  • create inside/outside basis disparities through various methods, including the use of certain partnership allocations and distributions,
  • capitalize on the disparity by either transferring a partnership interest in a nonrecognition transaction or making a current or liquidating distribution of partnership property to a partner, and
  • claim a basis adjustment under Internal Revenue Code sections 732(b), 734(b), or 743(b) resulting from the nonrecognition transaction or distribution.
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