how to begin a maid of honor speech

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Best Tips for Maid Of Honor Speech 2024: Samples & Ideas

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Crafting a memorable maid of honor speech can be both an honor and a daunting task. It’s a chance to celebrate the bride in a heartfelt way while engaging the audience. Whether you’re a seasoned speaker or feeling the nerves, this guide will walk you through simple and effective steps to create a speech that will leave everyone touched and smiling. Remember, the key to a great speech lies in authenticity and personal anecdotes – sharing genuine stories and emotions will make your words resonate with everyone present.

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Maid Of Honor Speech Examples

Best friend maid of honor speech.

After years of helping Maids of Honor deliver awesome speeches, founder of Speechy and author of ‘The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’, Heidi Ellert-McDermott, shares her tips. The first three-fifths of the speech should include revealing, entertaining stories that give an insight into the bride and your relationship with her. Don’t be shy of some affectionate teasing. 

We’ve made a research and after surveying over 50,000 brides, the maid of honor choice was crystal clear: more than 51% of them chose their best friend as their maid of honor. This role isn’t just about tradition—it’s about an unbreakable bond. A best friend’s speech resonates deeply, filled with shared memories and heartfelt wishes.

“If you haven’t had the chance to meet me yet, my name is X. (Bride) and I have been best friends for about 10 years. We met in high school gym class, and we couldn’t stand each other at first. As you can see, things eventually changed for the better. When (Bride) first asked me to be her Maid of Honor I felt flattered. But as the big day approached, she also told me to give a speech and a toast. I’m kind of the shy type and tried my best to get out of it. But, as (Groom) can tell you, it’s almost impossible to tell (Bride) No and get away with it. I wanted to tell you both how absolutely spectacular you look today. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a better-looking couple (except for maybe my boyfriend and I). And I hope you’re all having a lovely evening and I’d like to I wish you two all the love and happiness in the world. How blessed you are to celebrate your love on this beautiful day. I know there are many happy years ahead for you. Let’s all raise our glasses to the bride and groom, and wish them a lifetime of love and happiness!”

“I never had a sister, but (Bride) has been like a sister to me for all these years. We have similar tastes, we like similar clothes… I knew (Bride) had found the one when (Groom) walked into her life. Well, I’m fine with that – she saw him first! Actually, you could see that it was love at first, second, and third sight. He is her Prince Charming and it seems to me he gives her all she needs – a strong arm, a sympathetic ear, and his credit card.”

“I met (Bride) 6 years ago, as we tried to survive in the concrete jungle of NY. To thrive there, your tribe is essential. We are quite protective of each other, so I was a bit skeptical of (Groom) when he first came into the picture. But as time goes by, I can’t imagine anyone else but him to be her one and only. They say that anyone can be passionate, but it takes a real pair of lovers to be silly. Well, together, (Bride) and (Groom) are two of the goofiest people I know.”

“Hello everyone, my name is X, and by my dress, you can tell that I am the Maid of Honor today. For many years, we have been through thick and thin, and we have shared many memories. Today is another great day to add to our collection of sweet memories, so I’m really looking forward to the cake! I know you will have challenges as all relationships do. But you know what’s great about love and relationships and marriages? It is learning to grow together. Caring and sharing, and lots of tenderness. And maybe a bit of patience, or maybe even a lot. So let’s raise our glasses to the power of love, that makes all these wonderful things happen! Today you start a completely new chapter of your lives. What can I say? Never forget the two most important replies: ‘you’re right, dear’ and ‘okay, buy it’. Love and cherish each other! These two are a rare find in today’s world. Here’s to the groom who has a bride so fair, and here’s to the bride with a groom who is so rare.”

How to write a maid of honor speech for best friend?

• Introduction: Begin by introducing yourself and expressing how honored you are to be the maid of honor for your best friend.
• Fond Memories: Share special and cherished memories you’ve shared together, highlighting the bond you both share.
• Praise and Qualities: Speak about your best friend’s wonderful qualities, accomplishments, and the ways they have positively impacted your life and the lives of others.
• The Friendship: Emphasize the strength and significance of your friendship, and how it has grown over the years.
• Love and Support: Show appreciation for the bride’s partner and express your excitement about their journey together.
• Gratitude: Thank the guests for being a part of this special day and acknowledge the couple’s families.
• Toast: Raise a toast to your best friend and their partner, wishing them a lifetime of love, joy, and happiness together.

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Sister maid of honor speech.

According to our research, the second most popular choice for the maid of honor role is the bride’s sister. While tradition often places the best friend in the spotlight, a sister brings a unique depth to the role. Their shared history, growing up together, and the intrinsic bond make a sister’s speech incredibly touching. With a wealth of childhood memories and a deep understanding of the bride, a sister’s words carry immense emotional weight. When delivering the speech, draw upon this shared journey, express genuine emotions, and celebrate the love that binds not only siblings but also the newlyweds.

“As you may know, I am the bride’s younger sister. As we were growing up, I always wanted to be like her. Do the things she did, have the things she had –  I was probably a bit annoying, I always wanted to tag along. She taught me how to care, how to share, and how to try to reach for the stars. And as I grew up I wanted to be just as beautiful, caring, smart, and successful as her. (Bride) has always set an example for me to follow. Over the years she has shown me how to love and care. Today she shows me how to find a best friend, a partner, and a true lover, all in one person. I hope that I am just as lucky someday. It’s a great happiness to find someone who loves you as much as (Groom) loves my sister. Today, I want to thank both of you for being a part of my life, and to celebrate the love you both share. Like many sisters, we weren’t always best friends. I remember fights, screaming, and door-slamming, but I couldn’t have picked a better sister and a friend. Now that we are older, I can finally admit how happy I am to have grown up with such a great sister. Having a sister is one of the greatest things in life. Having a little sister is even better because I liked to be bossy. (Bride) always wanted to be a bit more like me… But actually, there is so much that I admire about her! I have watched her grow into the gorgeous woman that she is. It is a great honor for me to be her big sister!”

“First of all, I want to thank you all for being here with us today. As most of you know I am (Bride’s) sister. As we grew, we were as close as can be. We were always in trouble and I remember wondering if there will be a guy brave enough for someone as wild as my sister is. Well, here he is!My sis has just tied the knot. And I do believe that (Groom) is her perfect match. And today I realize that all she needs is a guy who will love her just the way she is, with all her craziness. Their commitment to each other inspires all of us because that’s what we call true love. So let’s raise our glasses to this amazing couple!”

“I want you to know that it took me 3 weeks to write this speech over and over again. And I couldn’t think of anything perfect enough to describe just how much I love you. I couldn’t find words to define the kind of sister you are to me. This is your big day and there is so much I want to say… I Googled a lot of maid of honor speech examples. The one piece of advice I kept finding over and over again was to start off with a quote. I did some research and I think their love is best described by Dr. Seuss: “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because the reality is finally better than your dreams.”

“Love, be true to her; Life, be dear to her; Health, stay close to her; Joy, draw near to her; Fortune, find what you can do for her, Search your treasure house through and through for her, Follow her footsteps the wide world over – And keep her husband always her lover. – By Anna Lewis, from “To the Bride”

How to write a maid of honor speech for sister?

• Introduction: Start by introducing yourself and your relationship with the bride, emphasizing your sisterly bond.
• Anecdotes: Share heartfelt and funny stories that highlight your sister’s qualities, achievements, or memorable moments you’ve shared together.
• Praise the bride: Compliment her personality, kindness, and the positive impact she has on others.
• Address the groom: Welcome him into the family and share a warm message about their relationship.
• Express gratitude: Thank the guests for attending and acknowledge your parents and other family members.
• Toast: Raise a glass and propose a heartfelt toast to the newlyweds and their future happiness together.

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Funny Maid Of Honor Speech

As a close friend of the bride, you would have a lot of material for wedding speeches bridesmaids, you just need to know how to put them all together. A few sample wedding speeches would give you the right kind of inspiration to get you on your way.

“Well, for those of you who I haven’t had the chance to meet yet, my name is [NAME]. [BRIDE] and I have been best friends for around the last 10 years. We first met at work one day, when she stole my carrot cake out of the fridge in the lunchroom and I threw away her pineapple yogurt cartons in revenge. I never had a sister, but [BRIDE] has been my stand-in sister for all these years. You could say we are even closer than sisters. We don’t fight like sisters, but we do wear each other’s clothes. Somehow she can still fit into my clothes but I can’t fit into hers anymore. I’m sure that is just because her dryer must be shrinking them. I knew [BRIDE] had found the one when [GROOM] walked into her life. Sure, she dated a few guys…after I was done torturing them. But [GROOM] was different. Unlike those jerks, he was kind and thoughtful. And he had a job. You could see that it was love at first, second, and third sight. Clearly [GROOM] is charming and it seems to me he offers her what she needs – a strong arm, a kind ear, and an American Express Black Card. I trust [BRIDE] and [GROOM] completely. I remember the time I asked them to watch my dog Benji when I went skiing in Europe. They were so nice to help out. I got back and Benji was so happy to see me. He was 40 pounds lighter and now he sees a therapist twice a week. Of course, we are having fun today. The test of this relationship will be over the long term. Will she still love [GROOM] when he leaves his underwear on the floor and cuts his toenails at the dinner table? The answer is no. God, please, disgusting. No, seriously, I know they will have challenges as all relationships do. And [GROOM] will learn what all men learn eventually. Keep your wife happy! Happy wife, happy life. No, really, what’s great about love and relationships and marriage is learning to grow together. The communication it takes to keep a marriage going is massive. But half the fun is working things out, talking, communicating, and launching kitchen appliances at each other – real love. Today has been a great day. Family and friends are here, the sun is shining and the champagne is flowing. And we’ll need it to get through this chicken dinner.”

Sometimes the hardest part of being a maid of honor to your bestie might be writing the wedding speech. Speaking with your friend face to face is always easy, however, making toasts or speeches in front of a group of people would be totally different and not as easy. This is why anecdotes and funny wedding speeches maid of honor could help you cruise through your speech while giving the wedding guests a laugh at the same time.

Funny Lines For Maid Of Honor Speech

• “I did some research on how to give the perfect maid of honor speech, and the first tip I found was to imagine everyone in their underwear. So, here we are, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to my nightmare!”
• “Being the maid of honor is like being a ninja. You have to be quick on your feet, prepared for anything, and ready to attack at a moment’s notice. But instead of throwing shurikens, I’m armed with embarrassing stories about the bride.”
• “As the maid of honor, I’ve been given the responsibility of keeping the bride calm and relaxed throughout the wedding planning process. Which is why I’ve been slipping her Xanax in her coffee every morning.”
• “When the bride asked me to be her maid of honor, I was thrilled. But then I realized it meant I had to give a speech in front of all these people. So if I faint halfway through, just drag me off stage and make it look like part of the act.”

Bridesmaid Wedding Speech

A list of example wedding speeches maid of honor could act as a template of sorts, helping you figure out just how to structure your speech.

Some of the best wedding speeches maid of honor, shine a light on the friendship between the bride and her maid of honor, as well as the beautiful personality of the bride. Most introductions begin with the story of meeting the groom for the first time. The intro is usually a good time to inject a funny quote, poem, or actual occurrence.

“Hi everyone, I am one of the bridesmaids at this wedding and I just wanted to say how happy and lucky I am to be here to celebrate [bride] and [groom’s] wedding with everyone. Today, everything looks effortless. From the beautiful wedding ceremony to the food, music, and decorations at this venue, every little detail was planned by [bride] and [groom.] And lots of time was spent shopping for dresses and doing fittings. When you get to peek behind the scenes, you see how much work really gets put into planning a wedding. There were a lot of late nights and hours spent working on this wedding and I have to say that it all turned out quite beautifully. Let’s all give a round of applause for [bride] and [groom.] [Bride] and [groom,] thank you for such a wonderful day. I raise my glass to the two of you and wish you nothing but the best in your life together. May each day be full of love and laughter between the two of you.”

Speeches are generally not as difficult as we imagine. So, you can relax, go through these samples, and create one of the best wedding toast speeches made of honor.

Short Maid Of Honor Speech Examples

“Greetings to all of you. I’m [Name], the maid of honor. I would like to express a few words about the lovely bride and groom. [Bride] has always been a wonderful friend to me, and it’s an honor to be her maid of honor today. And [Groom], I am delighted that you are joining our family. You two are a perfect match, and I wish you all the happiness and love in the world. Let’s raise a glass to the happy couple!”

“Hello, everyone. I’m [Name], the maid of honor. [Bride], you look breathtakingly beautiful today, and I feel grateful to be a part of your extraordinary day. [Groom], you’re a fortunate man! [Bride] is intelligent, gorgeous, and has a heart of gold. I am confident that you both will have a lifetime of love and happiness together. Congratulations on your special day!”

“Good evening, all. I’m [Name], the maid of honor, and for those who don’t know me, it’s lovely to meet you. I have known [Bride] for several years, and I have never seen her as happy as she is with [Groom]. You two bring out the best in each other, and it’s evident that you are destined to be together. It’s an honor to stand here today as a witness to your love and commitment. Congratulations to the joyful couple!”

“Hello everyone, I’m [Name], the maid of honor. [Bride], you’re my best friend and I couldn’t be happier to see you marry [Groom]. You two are perfect for each other and I wish you a lifetime of love and happiness. Congratulations!”

“Good evening, all. I’m [Name], the maid of honor, and I’m honored to celebrate [Bride] and [Groom]’s special day. [Bride], you’re my best friend and I’m so happy to see you with someone as wonderful as [Groom]. Wishing you both a lifetime of love and happiness. Congratulations!”

“Hi everyone, I’m [Name], the maid of honor, and I’m thrilled to celebrate my best friend [Bride] and her groom [Groom]. [Bride], I’m so proud of you and I know that [Groom] is the perfect partner for you. Here’s to a lifetime of happiness and love. Congratulations!”

“Good evening, everyone! For those who don’t know me, I’m [Your Name], and I have the incredible honor of standing by [Bride’s Name]’s side today as her maid of honor. First and foremost, I want to say how breathtakingly beautiful she looks tonight. As I stand here, I can’t help but reflect on the journey that led us to this moment. [Bride’s Name] and I have been inseparable since childhood, and I am beyond grateful for the memories we’ve created together. We’ve laughed together, cried together, and supported each other through life’s ups and downs. And now, as I watch her embark on this new chapter with [Groom’s Name], my heart overflows with joy. I’ve witnessed the love between them grow and flourish, and it’s truly something special. [Groom’s Name], thank you for making my best friend the happiest she’s ever been. To [Bride’s Name] and [Groom’s Name], may your love continue to blossom and may your journey together be filled with laughter, love, and adventure. Here’s to a lifetime of happiness. Cheers!”

“Hello, everyone! I’m [Your Name], and I have the honor of being [Bride’s Name]’s slightly crazy, but totally awesome, maid of honor! When [Bride’s Name] asked me to take on this role, I knew it would be an adventure. From choosing the perfect dress to planning wild bachelorette parties, we’ve had our fair share of laughs and tears. And let’s not forget about all the emergency wedding dress fittings! But in all seriousness, I couldn’t have asked for a better friend. [Bride’s Name] is compassionate, hilarious, and always there to lend a helping hand. She lights up every room she enters, and I know that [Groom’s Name] feels incredibly lucky to have her as his partner in crime. [Groom’s Name], welcome to the family! We’ve all been waiting for someone to take on the challenge of dealing with [Bride’s Name]’s terrible dance moves, and it looks like you’re up for it. To the happy couple, may your love be as endless as the dance floor at the reception. Here’s to a lifetime of happiness, laughter, and love. Cheers!”

“Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests, and most importantly, the beautiful couple of the day, [Bride’s Name] and [Groom’s Name]. I’m [Your Name], and I have the privilege of being [Bride’s Name]’s maid of honor. Today, I stand here with a heart full of emotions, for I’ve had the honor of witnessing the love between [Bride’s Name] and [Groom’s Name] blossom into something truly extraordinary. Their love is like a gentle breeze, calming our souls and reminding us of the beauty in life. [Bride’s Name], you’ve always been the ray of sunshine in my life. Your kindness, grace, and unwavering love inspire all who know you. And now, as you embark on this new journey with [Groom’s Name], I know that you’ll be a guiding light in his life as well. [Groom’s Name], thank you for cherishing and loving [Bride’s Name] with all your heart. Your dedication to making her happy is evident in every glance you share. Let us all raise our glasses to the newlyweds. May your love continue to grow, like the mighty oak standing tall through the changing seasons. May your days be filled with laughter, and your hearts forever intertwined. Congratulations, and here’s to a lifetime of happiness and love!”

When delivering a speech, remember to speak from the heart, keep it concise, and maintain a positive tone. Make sure to customize the speech to fit your relationship with the couple and the overall vibe of the wedding.

How to write a short wedding speech?

• Start by introducing yourself and briefly mentioning your relationship with the bride. This will help the audience understand your perspective and why you were chosen to be the maid of honor.
• Take a moment to express your gratitude for being a part of the special day and your well wishes for the newlyweds.
• Say a few words about the bride and groom, highlighting their qualities and how they complement each other. You can talk about their journey as a couple and your hopes for their future together.
• End your speech by raising a toast to the newlyweds.

Maid Of Honor Toasts

One of the tips for giving good wedding speeches – to use a good toast. A toast is basically well wished to the newlyweds and their family, followed by a signal for guests to raise their glasses.

If you are unsure what exactly to say, here are some beautiful maid of honor toast examples to inspire you.

• “And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight. – Philippians 1:9”
• “Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. – Ephesians 4:32”
• “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Here’s to love, laughter and happily ever after. – Romans 12:10″
• “As (Groom) and (Bride) start their new life together, Let’s toast to the new husband and wife!”
• “Here’s to the husband And here’s to the wife; May they remain Lovers for life.”
• “Here’s to the health of the happy pair; may good luck follow them everywhere; And may each day of wedded bliss be always as sweet and joyous as this.”
• “May you grow old on one pillow. May their joy be as bright as the morning, and their sorrows be shadows that fade in the sunlight of love.”
• “Let’s drink to love, which is nothing—unless it’s divided into two with someone you love. May your joys be as sweet as spring flowers that grow.”
• “As bright as a fire when winter winds blow; As countless as leaves that float down in the fall; And as serene as the love that keeps watching over us all.”

As the maid of honor, you need to find the one speech, that is short and sweet, and resonates with you! Great Maid of Honor wedding speeches often includes great quotes . Famous quotes have a way of painting a picture that our own words can’t seem to do on their own.

The Maid Of Honor Speech Template

Infographic.

The biggest worry that most maids of honor have is freezing and forgetting the speech. A great solution is breaking your speech into sections and writing them down on cards that you carry with you. As you practice your speech it will be easier to memorize, and having all the words with you will keep you from panicking.

To get you started, stick to our basic Maid Of Honor Speech Outline:

• Introduce yourself (your name, your relationship to the bride, and how long you’ve known each other)
• Thank everyone involved in the wedding planning for their hard work
• Talk about the bride (why she’s a good person and friend, share a story to illustrate it)
• Tell the love story (The most romantic version of how the bride and groom met)
• Talk about the groom (Compliment him, why he’s great for your friend, what he does for her etc)
• Celebrate the couple (Why they’re so good together)
• Wish the newlyweds wonderful things for the future You could also insert a quote or a poem.
• Toast to the bride and groom – Raise your glass, say: “Here’s to the happy couple”, take and sip and voila! You’ve nailed it!

How To Write The Best Maid Of Honor Speech Ever

We’ve all seen when speeches go wrong, so how you do you get it right? After years of helping Maids of Honor deliver awesome speeches, founder of Speechy , Heidi Ellert-McDermott, shares her tips.

• Introduce yourself & explain how you know the bride.
• Include humor throughout. Yes, your speech should be a loving tribute to a true friend, but it’s also meant to entertain a crowd.
• Once you’ve written your speech, try to edit it in half. Promise, your speech will be better the punchier it is. No one ever wished a speech was longer!
• Pay tribute to the bride’s partner with than a cursory platitude. Prove you genuinely know and like them!
• Rehearse as often as you can but use notes on the day. Delivering the speech shouldn’t be a memory test.
• Remember to smile throughout your delivery. It’s a powerful (and infectious) communication tool.

Don’t

• Resort to cheesy cliches about love and friendship.
• Google gags.
• Thank anyone. It’s not your job.
• Take up more than 10 mins mic time.
• Pretend the bride is perfect. Instead cherish the crazy character she truly is, with all her quirks and eccentricities.
• Talk over laughter when you deliver your speech. If you’ve written a funny line, leave a pause after you’ve said it to allow your audience to get the joke and respond. Don’t start talking till the last giggle has died down.
• Drink more than a glass of bubbles prior to your speech. Alcohol actually increases the stress hormone.

How to Get Started Maid of Honor Wedding Speech

• Know Your Audience: Consider the bride and groom’s personalities, the formality of the event, and the sensibilities of the guests. Tailor your speech to the audience.
• Start Early: Begin writing your speech well in advance. This allows time for revisions and practice. Don’t wait until the last minute.
• Personalize It: Share anecdotes and stories that reflect your relationship with the bride. Highlight special moments and inside jokes.

Examples of How to Get Started:

• Opening with a Quote: Start with an inspiring or humorous quote related to love or marriage. For instance,

“Maya Angelou once said, ‘Love recognizes no barriers.’ Today, we’re here to celebrate a love that knows no bounds.”

• Anecdotal Introduction: Begin with a personal story about your friendship with the bride.

“As I stand here today, I can’t help but think back to the time we met in kindergarten. Who would’ve thought that our friendship would lead us to this beautiful wedding?”

• Express Your Gratitude: Begin by expressing your gratitude for being chosen as the maid of honor.

“First and foremost, I want to thank [bride’s name] for giving me the honor of standing by her side today as her maid of honor.” Remember, the key to a memorable maid of honor speech is sincerity and a touch of humor, sprinkled with personal anecdotes that capture the essence of your relationship with the bride.

How To End A Maid Of Honor Speech

When figuring out how to write a maid of honor speech, keep in mind that the latter part of the speech should be where you talk about the couple. In that vein, it’s also important to know how to end the speech flawlessly. Here are a few tips.

• Keep it short and sweet. While you might have a lot to say, there are time slots for each speech, so keeping things short would be best.
• Use sentimental wedding quotes. You might have a maid of honor speech template you follow but adding inspirational quotes to your speech is a great way to wrap things up.
• Finish with a toast. At the very end, it is customary to raise a toast to the happy couple.

10 Maid Of Honor Speech Tips

After years of helping Maids of Honor deliver awesome speeches, founder of Speechy and author of ‘The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’, Heidi Ellert-McDermott, shares her tips.

Planning Your Speech

• Think of the speechwriting process as writing a dissertation (only this time, don’t leave it till the night before your deadline!).
• Firstly, jot down all your ideas and favourite stories and then construct a central idea (narrative theme) that you stick to through. It could be that your friend is always right, or maybe the newlyweds prove that opposites really do attract. Whatever it is, make sure your speech flows from one idea to the next, rather than being a list of random thoughts.

Speech Structure

• Remember to introduce yourself and how you know the bride at the start of the speech and try to include humor within the first 30 seconds. Resist the urge to include any of those tired googled-wedding-gags and ensure your line is original and relates to the couple themselves or the surroundings you find yourself in.
• The first three-fifths of the speech should include revealing, entertaining stories that give an insight into the bride and your relationship with her. Don’t be shy of some affectionate teasing.
• Towards the latter half of the speech, introduce her partner and explain why the couple are suited. Again, make sure to include some good-natured humour here.
• The final fifth of your speech could be a full-on love-bomb of a tribute to your friend. Make sure you avoid the usual cliches and platitudes about friendship and instead, try to nail the bride’s individual characteristics and quirks that make you love her.

Edit Your Speech

• When you’ve finished writing your speech, try to edit it in half. You may not achieve it but once you get editing, you’ll be surprised by the amount of needless waffle that’s in there.
• Remember, a speech is better punchy, so be brutal. A good maid of honour speech is generally between 700 and 1,100 words. No more than 10 minutes airtime!

Choosing Quotes for a Memorable Maid of Honor Speech

Talking about love and trying to sum up a friendship, can be hard. Luckily, some other clever people have already done it and we can all exploit their genius! Whilst plagiarism isn’t ever cool, finding the perfect quote to supercharge your speech is a great idea. Founder of Speechy (the bespoke speechwriting service), Heidi Ellert-McDermott, shares her tips for hunting the perfect quote to honour your bestie.

How to Use Quotes

• Don’t resort to a generic ‘marriage advice’ quote. They’re over-used.
• Don’t overload your speech with quotes. One, maximum two.
• Quote recognisable names – or at least provide some context. Don’t quote someone you need to Google or someone who’s a random ‘relationship coach’.
• Once you add the perfect quote to your speech, script a comedy back ref or put it into the context of the couple’s real-life relationship.
• Remember, quotes can be used to add the necessary humor, as well as the sentiment.

Where to Find Quotes

• Don’t just search for ‘wedding quotes’ on Pinterest.
• Quotes become more meaningful if they come from somewhere that means something to the couple. Could the quote come from the bride’s favourite book, her partner’s favourite film, or maybe it’s from that song you play when you’ve both had a few too many dirty martinis.
• Quotes can be found everywhere from children’s books to rom-coms, from hip-hop classics to the great philosophers, from historical icons to classic sitcoms so enjoy the search!

Frequently Asked Questions

Does the maid of honor have to give a speech.

It’s definitely customary for the maid of honor to give a toast to the newlyweds at the reception, but usually, she gave a sweet speech.

How long should a maid of honor speech be?

A maid of honor speech should ideally be around 3 to 5 minutes in length. This timeframe allows you to convey your message effectively without losing the audience’s attention or making other speeches feel rushed.

What should be avoided in a maid of honor speech?

When delivering a maid of honor speech, there are a few things to avoid to ensure it is memorable for the right reasons:

• Avoid embarrassing or offensive stories: You shouldn’t share anything that may make the bride uncomfortable or might be inappropriate for the audience.
• Steer clear of inside jokes: Inside jokes may exclude or confuse other guests who are not familiar with the context. Keep your speech inclusive and relatable for everyone present.
• Don’t overshadow the couple: Avoid making the speech all about yourself or unrelated topics that detract from the celebration of the couple’s special day.
• Avoid excessive alcohol consumption: Excessive alcohol consumption can impair your ability to deliver a coherent and meaningful message.
• Don’t go on for too long: Avoid rambling or dragging out the speech, as it may lose the interest of the audience.

Remember, the maid of honor speech is an opportunity to celebrate the couple and express your love and support for them.

We hope that now you have everything you need for your perfect maid of honor speech. So just keep all of this in mind as you prepare and deliver your maid of honor speech, and you will be amazing. Make the bride proud she chose you!

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How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech

A flawless maid of honor speech can't be hastily written on your phone at the reception—it takes time and a lot of practice. Here's how to write a maid of honor speech that will garner a standing ovation.

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As a maid of honor in your BFF’s upcoming wedding, you're likely pretty thrilled about all that's in store for you, from the awesome maid of honor duties , to the epic events to plan ( hey bachelorette party !) to that maid of honor speech — but it's also normal to be a bit nervous, too. As we said, the maid of honor has lots of responsibilities, which include writing and delivering the maid of honor speech. The maid of honor speech usually occurs during the wedding reception, but you might be asked to deliver it at the rehearsal dinner instead. If you’re comfortable speaking in front of a crowd or have a background in acting or performing, the maid of honor speech should be a breeze . But, considering that public speaking is a very common fear, you might be anxious . And even if giving the maid of honor speech doesn’t worry you, figuring out exactly how to write a maid of honor speech likely does. It’s an important moment for both you and the bride, and of course you want to make it special.

How do you prepare the most amazing maid of honor speech she’s ever heard and alleviate some of your anxieties? We’re here to help.

When to start writing a maid of honor speech.

Presuming you haven’t procrastinated too long, you should give yourself as much time as possible to prepare — start at least three weeks to a month before the wedding. This may seem like a lot of time to write a short maid of honor speech, but the longer you wait to write, the more stressed you’ll become.

Choose a time when you’re feeling inspired by your friendship with the bride and/or couple. If you’re feeling extra sentimental after the bachelorette party brought up a plethora of stories you had forgotten about, write them down. Don’t underestimate the power of free writing, during which you unleash all of the thoughts and anecdotes about your bestie that cross your mind onto the page. That way, you’ll be able to see all of your feelings and memories all together at once. From there, who knows? More likely than not, you’ll discover some sort of inspiration within these reflections.

The maid of honor speech outline.

1. how to start the maid of honor speech..

First off, introduce yourself and mention your relationship with the bride, and the couple. Next, be sure you thank whomever you feel is important enough to mention, depending on the circumstances and who paid for or planned the wedding — parents, other family members, wedding party members, etc. Congrats! You have two lines of your speech out of the way.

2. Talk about the bride. 

Now things start to get more personal. If you were just going to express gratitude, it would be a toast, not a maid of honor speech. One crowd-pleasing story you might consider including is how you met the bride. If it’s not a particularly appealing or appropriate story, you might also consider a story about the two of you the really exemplifies your friendship, or a time when you knew you were going to be friends forever. If the two of you share a bond over food, maybe you could talk about that time the two of you tried (and failed) to make your own recipe from scratch. Maybe you were really frustrated at first when you were assigned to be partners in class because you didn’t think you were going to get along, but as fate would have it, you became inseparable. Get creative and get sentimental. And don’t be afraid to be funny .

3. Talk about her partner. 

After talking about you and the bride, it might be a good idea to include how you first met her almost-spouse in the maid of honor speech. I once witnessed a maid of honor that had been friends with the bride for many years, and during her speech she recalled that the bride actually had set her and the groom up on a blind date at first. The maid of honor and the future groom talked about their common friend for the entire date—and the rest was history. You’re the bride’s right hand woman, but a wedding is all about celebrating the couple, so it’s a nice transition from talking about you and the bride into talking about the bride and her partner. It also shows your solidarity and support for their relationship. No matter how you truly feel about her partner, keep a happy face on.

4. Talk about them as a couple. 

Speaking of which, after you explain how you met the bride’s new spouse, talk about the two of them as a couple. This works even better if you’ve known both of them for a long time. Maybe you were the bride’s roommate when they had their first date, and you witnessed her giddy nerves beforehand. Maybe you witnessed the very prolonged will-they-or-won’t-they period of their relationship. What did she tell you after they said "I love you," for the first time? At one wedding, the groom’s sister told a story that took place about three months before the groom and bride had gotten together. The sister was teasing her brother about his love life, when he said, “I’m in love with my best friend, but it will never happen, she’s not interested.” Her brother wouldn’t give any names — but three months later, she figured it out for herself when they started dating.

5. Keep it short and sweet.

In thinking about how to write a maid of honor speech, remember that it should only be about two to three minutes long. That’s just long enough to tell a few stories about the beloved couple and toast to a happy future. Everyone will probably be anxious to start dancing (or eating!) at this point, so there’s no need to drag on. We tend to talk more quickly when we’re nervous, so be extra aware to speak slowly. 

6. Practice.

Be sure to practice your speech in advance — whether it’s in front of a mirror, your cat, or a family member or friend. You can even time yourself to make sure the speech is an appropriate length.

7. End with a toast.

Don't forget to toast to the happy couple at the end! Raising your glass is a great natural finisher to your maid of honor speech, and a guaranteed crowd pleaser. You can add a few words, like "Now, let's all raise a glass to the newlyweds!" or something similarly concise and to the point.

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What to NOT say in a maid of honor speech

Here's what to avoid when writing your maid of honor speech.

1. Exes, drunken nights or anything else remotely inappropriate. 

It should go without saying, but exes or drunken debauchery should not be included in a maid of honor speech. A wedding is a family event, after all. Don’t talk about anything the bride wouldn’t mind her grandmother hearing. 

2. Anything that could even potentially cause tension.

Don’t mention the high divorce rate — even jokingly. It will not be received well.

3. Don’t feel pressured to be anything but yourself.

If humor isn’t your strong suit, it doesn’t have to be a hilarious maid of honor speech. You can be nostalgic, sweet, or sentimental — but not drunk. Wait to drink until after your maid of honor speech .

Whatever you write in your maid of honor speech, the most important thing is that your words come from the heart. Even if you’re not a natural-born performer , speak with feeling and emotion — not like you’re reading a classroom assignment—and talk directly to the couple, rather than focusing on the many other faces in the crowd. Your bestie may not remember the exact words you said during your maid of honor speech, but she’ll remember the care and love behind it.

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A Step-by-Step Guide to Nailing Your Maid of Honor Speech

• Chapelle writes articles for The Knot Worldwide. She covers all things wedding-related and has a personal interest in covering celebrity engagements and fashion.
• Before joining The Knot Worldwide, Chapelle was an editorial intern for Subvrt Magazine.
• Chapelle has a degree in English writing from Loyola University New Orleans.

As a wedding party member, you'll likely be asked to speak at the wedding. In fact, giving a maid of honor speech is one of the most important maid of honor duties to complete on the big day. You may be a gifted orator, which means writing (and giving) a speech will be a breeze. But if the thought of speaking in front of a crowd makes you a little nervous, don't panic. With the help of Heidi Ellert-McDermott, professional speech writer and founder of Speechy , we've provided you with everything you need to know about the matron of honor speech. Learn what to say, how to say it and exactly how to get rid of any nervous butterflies. Use these tips, template, outline and more to write a perfect maid of honor speech that'll bring the house down.

In this article:

Printable Template | How to Write | Examples | Tips | FAQs

Printable Maid of Honor Speech Template

For those looking for a quick and simple reminder of how to write a maid of honor speech, bookmark this template. You could even save it as your phone or laptop wallpaper while you're writing to keep you on task.

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech Outline

So, how do you write a matron of honor speech? It helps, but you don't need to be a professional speechwriter to write a special toast for the newlyweds. Use this guide to create a heartfelt message that'll make everyone laugh, cry or both.

1. Reflect on your relationship with the couple.

Think about your relationships with each person in the couple. This is your time to write down any personal moments you shared with them. These moments can bring some tears or laughs, but they show the wedding guests how you know the happy couple. Maybe you and one of the newlyweds went on an epic trip to Europe together. Or you and the newlyweds have known each other since high school and have plenty of silly and embarrassing stories from that time. No matter which memory you choose for your maid of honor speech, pick your favorite (appropriate) story and have fun with it.

2. Celebrate the couple's relationship.

Another part of your matron of honor speech should be dedicated to the couple's relationship. You can talk about when they first met, when you knew they were in love, or how you knew they were meant to be. If some details are a little fuzzy, talk with the other honor attendants or close friends of the couple to help refresh your memory. Overall, you want to paint a picture of how the couple was when they first met, how they've grown together and why they complement one another.

3. Avoid taboo topics.

There are certain topics you shouldn't have in your maid of honor speech. It doesn't matter how you try to deliver it. These taboo subjects are liable to offend someone:

• Negativity about marriage in general.
• Past relationships.
• Previous marriages/divorces.
• Drinking, drugs, gambling.
• "Adult" humor or any other mention of sex.

Remember, you don't want to cause any drama. Keep the focus of your speech on uplifting the happy couple and celebrating their love for one another.

4. Add jokes—but not too many.

Feel like you have a comedic gift? Consider adding some jokes, one-liners or funny marriage quotes to your maid of honor speech. Ensure you don't use any inside jokes or references only you and the newlyweds would understand. Your speech should be something every wedding guest can appreciate and laugh at. This also means your jokes shouldn't be too harsh or bring up any taboo wedding speech topics we previously listed.

Be deliberate about where you put your jokes and spread them out. You want them to add comedic relief to a sentimental toast, not seem like a stand-up routine. Start your speech with a funny opening line so the guests can laugh and get an idea of what kind of person you are—plus, laughs give you time to overcome any nerves you might have.

5. Create your maid of honor speech outline.

Get creative and personalize your maid of honor speech as much as you want. A customized script is much more endearing for guests. But when it comes down to it, a great wedding toast will include the following remarks:

• Start with an introduction—along with an explanation about your connection to the happy couple.
• Next, give a word of thanks to the couple for inviting you to be part of their special day.
• Say one or two personal anecdotes, like a favorite memory, joke or sweet sentiment that most guests will understand.
• Provide encouraging advice or a thoughtful quote about the newlyweds' future.
• Finish with a closing remark and an invitation for guests to raise their glasses.

Maid of Honor Speech Examples

Need more than a maid of honor speech template to help you? Then choose your favorite sample maid of honor speech below and use it to help get your creative juices flowing.

Funny Maid of Honor Speech

Hello! For those of you who haven't had the chance to meet me yet, my name is [Your Name]. [Newlywed's Name] and I have been best friends since high school, which means we've been on each other's top eight friends list for a while. That's for my old Myspace users out there.

Typically, public speaking makes me beyond nervous, but I knew I had to make a speech for one of the most important people in my life. I've known [Newlywed's Name] for a long time and have appreciated every special moment we've shared over the years. [Newlywed's Name] has a beautiful soul, and I'm so happy that [Newlywed's Name] has found someone who complements it.

As everyone probably knows [Newlywed's Name] isn't a shy person, so the fact that [Newlywed's Name] would always giggle and blush whenever referring to 'the hot coworker' and I knew something special was going to come out of it. I've gotten to know [Spouse's Name] really well over the years, and I can honestly say [Spouse's Name] is one of the most genuine and caring people I've ever met.

Everyone aims to find their one true love, their soulmate, the person that's going to love and cherish them for the rest of their lives. And that moment came for [Newlywed's Name]...when they met me 18 years ago. But in all seriousness, I wish you and [Spouse's Name] a long and wonderful marriage. Congrats to you both, and I hope you find a lifetime of happiness together. Cheers!

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Maid of honor speech for best friend.

Good evening everyone! I thought the most nerve-wracking part of being a maid of honor was giving the speech, but fixing [Newlywed's Name] shoe malfunction before the wedding ceremony is high on the list.

I think I've calmed down by now, so I'll continue. My name is [Your Name], and I've known [Newlywed's Name] since college. We sat next to each other one time in an eight A.M. Spanish class and have been inseparable ever since. We've known each other for so long I would consider us siblings now, and I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful person in my life.

[Spouse's Name] is charming, intelligent, thoughtful and to quote [Newlywed's Name] after their first date, 'sooo cuteee.' I consider myself a top-notch wingwoman and matchmaker, but even I couldn't have picked a better person for [Newlywed's Name] to fall in love with. Anyone can take one look at them together and see that they're a perfect example of 'meant to be.'

I'm honored that you both have not only chosen me to be a significant part of your big day but also a significant person in your lives. I'm excited to watch you two enjoy this new chapter in your lives as a married couple. I love you both so much!

Maid of Honor Speech for Sister

Hello everyone! If you couldn't tell already from our almost identical faces, I'm [Bride's Name] sister. We're only two years apart, so we've always been really close. We would do everything together, like that one time we got gum stuck in our hair on the same day and spent hours combing peanut butter into each other's hair to help get the gum out. Unfortunately, this didn't work out, and we had to chop a lot of hair off.

Regardless of all the trouble we've got ourselves into, I can't imagine sharing such fun memories with anyone else. I've always looked up to [Bride's Name] and continue to think of her as a great role model to me and many others. I feel so happy and proud to call [Bride's Name] my sister.

[Spouse's Name], you've come into our lives seamlessly, and I've never seen my sister happier. You're such a funny and loving person, and to this day, every time my sister talks about you, she gets giddy. I really do think you guys are perfect for one another, and I can't wait to see how you grow even more as life partners.

Everyone raise your glass to congratulate [Bride's Name] and [Spouse's Name]. May each day be full of love and laughter!

Maid of Honor Speech for Cousin

Shout out to Ellert-McDermott for writing the passionate maid of honor speech below.

Ladies and gentlemen, friends and family and all you lucky souls who scored an invite to the wedding of the century. My name is [Your Name], and I have the pleasure of being the maid of honor today, or as I like to call it, the 'official party planner, the emergency dress fixer and human tissue dispenser.'

You all know [Bride's Name] as this gorgeous, successful, brilliant person you see before you today, but I know her as my little cousin. And I don't care how many promotions she gets, how many exotic countries she visits or how married she gets, that's who she'll always be to me. Yes, the girl who, for several years, ate nothing but chicken nugget sandwiches and had a special tree she liked to wee behind when we visited Grandma.

Being the only girls in our tribe of siblings, we quickly became best friends and partners in crime. We loved playing dress-up, but rather than pretending to marry our Prince Charmings, we'd pretend to be lawyers or scientists. And we wonder why no one wanted to hang out with us.

Our geekiness lasted well into our teens and developed into a mild addiction to One Direction, "Glee" and astronomy. We'd spend hours staring into our telescopes, wondering what we would say when we became the first astronauts to land on Mars. Sadly, that dream never came to fruition, but [Bride's Name], as we all know, did become a lawyer—an incredibly successful one at that.

But seriously, watching [Bride's Name] achieve her dreams has been a delight because she's quite simply one of life's special people. I feel incredibly lucky to have been blessed with such a fun-loving, wise and caring cousin––a special type of friend who's duty-bond to be in my life forever.

I always knew that [Bride's Name] deserved to be loved by someone special, and I'm delighted to say that person is [Newlywed's Name]. I've had the privilege of getting to know [Newlywed's Name] well over the last three years, and I must say, you're a brave soul for marrying into our family and having to cope with our crazy Christmas traditions. But I think you've figured out our secret. The louder we are, the more we like you. And just to clarify, we like you very much.

You have a kind heart, a wonderful wit and you're willing to dance to One Direction after we've had a few beers. I can also see how much you love my cousin. I can see that you 'get her;' that you know just how she likes her coffee, that you understand her sarcasm is a sign of affection and that you appreciate how intelligent she is even if she insists on watching "Selling Sunset" at every opportunity she can.

You're an incredible couple, and I've no doubt your love will continue to grow with every passing day. As your maid of honor, I couldn't be happier for you, and I look forward to sharing more happy memories with you guys in the future. And with that, everyone please join me in a toast to the happy couple and a life filled with love and laughter.

Short Maid of Honor Speech

I would like to quote the famous American author, Mark Twain, who once said, 'To get the full value of joy, you must have someone to divide it with.' This perfectly explains why [Newlywed's Name] and [Spouse's Name] have always radiated so much joy since they've met each other.

I do not doubt [Newlywed's Name] has found the person they will spend the rest of their life with. You both make a beautiful couple and may you continue to get the full value of joy out of life with one another.

Congratulations, [Newlywed's Name] and [Spouse's Name]!

Maid of Honor Speech Tips

Completing your matron of honor speech is a big accomplishment, but the work doesn't stop when you write the closing line. The right delivery is what makes it. Here are confidence tips for your maid of honor speech and other speaking engagements.

Don't procrastinate.

We recommend you start writing your maid of honor speech at least two months before the wedding day. As an honor attendant, you're expected to attend and plan numerous prewedding events, like dress fittings, the bach party and the rehearsal dinner , which means you won't have much time to write as the wedding day approaches. Also, it doesn't hurt to write a few drafts and ask someone you trust to edit your work. By preparing in advance, you'll be able to focus on writing a toast you're excited to read in front of a crowd and not have to worry about leaving a wedding event early so you can go home and write.

Add stories, not adjectives.

"Adjectives are just white noise in wedding speeches. Describing the newlywed as 'kind,' 'fun' or 'beautiful' is nice but doesn't really add much. Illustrate their characteristics and qualities by sharing the evidence of them in action," Ellert-McDermott, author of "The Modern Couple's Guide to Wedding Speeches," says.

Be true to yourself.

This is the time to open your heart and share a few favorite memories or silly stories that capture your relationship with the newlyweds. So don't feel pressured to write a maid of honor speech that sounds overly professional. A great maid of honor toast is about speaking honestly and naturally, so write how you generally speak. Don't forget this isn't the time to use inappropriate language since you'll be speaking to the couple's nearest and dearest. Your writing should feel like a natural extension of the way you talk. A genuine speech from the heart is impactful.

Remember to mention the partner.

"Yes, the focus of your speech is your friend and your relationship with them, but don't forget what the day's actually about. Try to make your tribute to their partner seem like more than a cliched afterthought," Ellert-McDermott advises.

Write it down.

Yes, you're expected to make an amazing speech, but that doesn't mean you must memorize it. Writing the entire speech word for word or just jotting down bullet points of your speech's outline can work wonders for your confidence. We suggest you read your maid of honor speech on index cards instead of reading it off your cell phone. Phones are more convenient, but the phone screen light that washes over your face as you're reading your speech distorts wedding photographs. To avoid ruining any wedding images, write your speech down instead. ( Psst. People say handwritten notes boost brain activity and optimize memory.)

Practice in front of an audience.

Practicing your speech is just as important as writing it. As with any public speaking gig, you'll become more comfortable with the material as you practice it. Read your toast aloud a few times to catch any spelling or grammar errors. This will also help you find a rhythm—you'll know exactly when you want to pause for reactions and emphasize certain points, which is key for staying within a designated time frame. You can also read your words to another wedding party member for feedback. When the time comes to stand up in front of the crowd, you'll be grateful for the pre-performance audience.

Stay calm, cool and collected.

Whether this is your first time giving a wedding speech or you're a pro, it's normal to feel a little nervous beforehand. Take a few deep breaths to calm your nerves and collect your thoughts. Speak slowly and clearly, and remind yourself that guests are excited to hear what you're saying. As nerve-wracking as it might feel to give a big speech at your loved one's wedding, their heartfelt reaction to your words will make your efforts worth it. As soon as your speech is over, you'll be free to celebrate with the newlyweds and the rest of the wedding party.

Don't forget to smile.

"Because they're nervous, speakers often forget to smile as they deliver their speech, but it's a simple and effective way to create a good vibe in the room. A smile is literally infectious, so make sure it looks like you're actually enjoying your time on the mic," Ellert-McDermott says. Putting on a soft smile also helps the photographer capture stunning pictures of you killing your speech.

Maid of Honor Speech Frequently Asked Questions

Delivering a unique maid of honor speech can seem daunting, but we're here to help you take the stress out of it. Here are answers to common questions regarding the maid of honor speech.

Does the maid of honor have to give a speech?

It's expected for a maid of honor to give a speech, especially if the other honor attendants are planning on giving one, but it's not required. Giving a maid of honor speech can be a fun experience, but it isn't for everyone. If public speaking makes you nervous, you can express yourself in other ways, like through song, dance or by creating a sweet love story presentation about the happy couple.

How long should a maid of honor speech be?

In addition to the matron of honor speech, there might also be a best man speech , toasts from the couple's parents or even a thank-you message from the newlyweds. Since there are several speeches to fit in with meal courses, dancing, games and additional reception activities , keep your salutations short and sweet. Aim to make your maid of honor speech a minimum of four minutes and at most six minutes—Ellert-McDermott suggests anything between 700 and 1000 words.

Wedding guests will be excited to hear your well-wishes and funny stories, but a long MOH speech can lose the wedding guests' interest (especially if it's full of too many personal inside jokes). A four-minute speech gives you enough time to speak about the couple's love story, offer a personal anecdote or two and finish with encouragement for married life.

How to Start a Maid of Honor Speech

"Like every other speaker, the maid of honor should say a quick hello and introduce themselves to the guests. They should explain how they know the bride and try to add some humor early on too. Tailor your speech to suit the style of the wedding. Is it a rock n roll affair or a traditional bash with children present? Consider your audience and decide if 'ladies and gentlemen' is necessary or overly formal (generally, it's the latter)," Ellert-McDermott notes.

How to End a Maid of Honor Speech

"Towards the end of the speech, the maid of honor should reiterate their joy in seeing their friend getting married. They may refer back to special memories they share with the bride and explain why she is such a great friend to them. The final few lines should be about wishing the couple well in their future life together and proposing a toast to them both," Ellert-McDermott suggests. Here is an example of a personal maid of honor toast ending from Ellert-McDermott:

Here's to a lifetime of drinking mojitos and dancing on tables. To Sophie and Taylor.

When does the maid of honor give a speech?

If the couple is following the traditional wedding speech order , the maid of honor gives her speech after the newlyweds' parents. Typically, following the maid of honor is the best man. That wedding speech order isn't for everyone since a couple's wedding party size and reception timeline impact the order too. Also, sometimes couples opt to have all the wedding speeches delivered during the rehearsal dinner. So check with the to-be-weds about the order to confirm your spot in the toast lineup.

What to do if there are multiple maids of honor?

If you are one of the multiple maids of honor , you and the others should keep your maid of honor speeches to three to five minutes long. Before delivering your speeches, we suggest you and the other maids of honor go over them together to make sure they aren't too similar (and if they are, to adjust accordingly). If you and the other maids of honor have a close relationship, want to create only one speech or you don't want to give your speech alone, consider doing a joint maid of honor speech. By doing a combined speech, you have more opportunities to be creative, like setting each other up for jokes or performing a heartfelt song together.

How to Give A Perfect Maid of Honor Speech: A Step-by-Step Guide

• The Speaker Lab
• March 15, 2024

Table of Contents

Standing by the bride’s side on her wedding day comes with the duty of delivering a maid of honor speech . This toast is more than just words; it’s a celebration, an embodiment of sisterhood, and a gift to be remembered. As you embark on crafting this pivotal message, our guide offers practical steps for creating an address that echoes your unique connection with the bride and touches every heart in attendance.

Dive into tips that will help you share heartfelt stories about your bond, balance humor with sincerity for laughs without tears, and project confidence as you speak from the heart. Whether you’re best friends or siblings doesn’t matter—we’ve got insights tailored to make sure your maid of honor toast honors not only tradition but also personal style. Here are a few tips on turning your thoughts into an unforgettable tribute to love and friendship.

Crafting Your Maid of Honor Speech: A Step-by-Step Guide

When it’s time to craft your maid of honor speech, starting with the bride and ending with the couple sets a narrative that flows from personal affection to shared joy. Think about how you first met or a moment that embodies her spirit. Brainstorming ideas can help capture those perfect tidbits for your outline.

Mention the Couple in Your Speech

Your bond with the bride is unique, so let your speech reflect that. Kick things off by highlighting her quirks, strengths, and endearing traits. But remember, today marks not just another chapter in her life but also in their shared story as a couple. Transition smoothly from talking about just the bride to talking about her and her partner, celebrating their union. This shift will resonate well during any wedding reception.

Utilize Anecdotes

Anecdotes are like spices—they make good stories great. Weave these stories throughout your speech to paint an authentic picture of your relationship with memorable moments. If she’s always been there for you through thick and thin or if she has dance moves that could rival Beyoncé’s—now’s your chance to share these laugh-out-loud instances while crafting an unforgettable tribute.

Incorporating heartfelt anecdotes within speeches strengthens connections—not only between speakers but also among everyone gathered here today who came together thanks to true love blossoming between two amazing individuals.

End Positively

Aim high as you close out—a toast wishing future happiness for the couple brings smiles all around. Wish them laughter-filled days ahead because nothing beats seeing our loved ones happy.

Personalizing Your Speech with Heartfelt Stories

Your maid of honor speech is not just another wedding toast. It’s a narrative that weaves your life with the bride into an unforgettable tale. Personal anecdotes are the threads that turn this speech from ordinary to extraordinary, making every guest feel like they’ve been part of your journey.

Best Friend Memories That Shine

You’re her maid of honor for good reason: you have stories that span years and heartbeats. In your speech, reflect on those shared moments, whether it was spontaneous dance moves at concerts or hours spent plotting future happiness over coffee. Witnessing true love blossom between the couple has surely impacted you deeply too—share these observations by weaving their journey through your narrative seamlessly. It’s about showcasing the sisterly bond between best friends—one that will continue through marriage and beyond.

Sisterly Bonds That Last a Lifetime

If she’s not only your friend but also your sister, there’s even more depth to explore in your tribute. Growing up together means sharing everything: secrets, clothes (sometimes begrudgingly), and countless firsts—from steps to crushes to major milestones like graduating college. Mentioning experiences unique to siblings adds layers of emotion others can appreciate, because who hasn’t felt love tug sharply during family moments?

Talk about how being the bride’s younger sister has shaped both of you—how her strength inspired yours or how sibling antics paved the way for mutual respect and understanding today. Here’s where storytelling excels, painting pictures so vivid every listener feels part of those cherished childhood scenes.

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The Art of Humor in Maid of Honor Speeches

Injecting humor into a maid of honor speech is like adding the perfect amount of spice to a dish—it enhances the flavor without overpowering it. When you’re aiming to make the maid of honor speech funny and entertaining, remember that timing is everything. Adding humor to your maid of honor speech means striking a balance. You want guests chuckling with fondness, not cringing in their seats.

Balance Funny Lines with Sincerity

Finding just the right mix can be tricky but think about those moments shared with your best friend (or sisterly bonds if she’s family). These relationships are treasure troves for humorous yet endearing stories. If she’s been known for her questionable dance moves since childhood, share that anecdote before tying it back to her lovely personality—this way laughter arises from affection rather than embarrassment.

When brainstorming ideas to add comedic elements into your tribute, look at experiences that shine a light on who she truly is. Letting personal anecdotes lead naturally toward touching insights offers up plenty more than laughs. It speaks volumes about depth behind sisterly love or friendship long cherished.

Incorporate Shared Experiences

To ensure your jokes land well with all wedding guests, consider how well they know both bride and groom—the audience should feel included in each jest. After all, love story references hit differently when even distant relatives nod along because they understand where you’re coming from.

Respect Wedding Party Etiquette

While humor adds spice to any good story, it’s crucial not to mention exes or bring up anything inappropriate in your wedding speech . Instead, choose uplifting memories—maybe ones revolving around wedding planning or other milestones leading up till now. Whatever you choose, know that weaving genuine sentiments within jokes ensures laughter doesn’t overshadow sincerity. 

Wedding Words and Speechy provide excellent resources if looking for help writing such messages effectively.

Tips for Public Speaking Mastery

Public speaking can feel like dancing on a tightrope, but with the right techniques, you’ll have the audience in the palm of your hand. One essential skill is mastering anxiety. If public speaking makes you nervous, using breathing techniques and visualization can transform nerves into compelling energy.

Overcoming Public Speaking Anxiety

Anxiety before public speaking is like an unwelcome guest at weddings—it shows up uninvited. To send this gatecrasher packing, try grounding yourself with deep breaths. Alternatively, visualize delivering that killer toast amidst roaring applause from guests. This is just one effective way to set positive expectations for your performance.

Practicing Your Maid of Honor Speech Delivery

The artistry of wedding speeches lies not only in what you say but how you say it. To get comfortable with how you deliver your speech, practice plenty. Recite your speech out loud in front of a mirror until your words feel smooth and effortless. As you practice, pay attention to your timing. After all, a well-placed pause after delivering a joke invites laughter and builds rapport with wedding guests who hang on every word.

Using Breathing Techniques and Visualization

A deep inhale has power beyond filling lungs—it centers focus too. When anxious thoughts arise while standing before wedding reception attendees, take slow breaths to reclaim composure.

Etiquette Essentials for Maid of Honor Speeches

Making sure your maid of honor speech hits all the right notes is about striking a balance between humor and sentimentality, while also being mindful of proper etiquette. Crafting such an address isn’t just about writing; it’s also delivering a message that resonates with the wedding guests and honors the happy couple.

Dos and Don’ts When Writing Your Speech

The first rule in maid of honor speeches is to be respectful at all times. Remembering this will help you avoid common mistakes like mentioning exes or inside jokes that might not sit well with everyone present. Keep your anecdotes tasteful and ensure they highlight the beautiful bond you share with the bride or her partner.

Avoid going off on tangents by sticking to a concise speech outline . This structure should guide you through touching upon key moments shared without losing focus on what makes this union remarkable.

Proper Etiquette in Timing Your Toast

Brevity is soulful wit’s friend when addressing wedding guests during such momentous occasions as these. Ideally your speech will last about two minutes.

Balancing Humor with Sentimentality

Funny lines are welcome breathers amid heartfelt sentiments. However, never lets laughs come at someone else’s expense nor derail from your main points.

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FAQs on Giving a Maid of Honor Speech

What does the maid of honor say in her speech.

The maid of honor toasts with anecdotes, praises for the bride, well-wishes for the couple, and usually a splash of humor.

What is an ideal maid of honor speech?

An ideal toast blends warmth, wit, and wisdom about the bride’s journey and her future with her partner.

How do you start off a maid of honor speech?

Kick things off by warmly greeting guests before diving into your heartfelt connection with the bride.

What is an example of a maid of honor speech for best friends?

“As we’ve journeyed from carefree days on the swing set to this moment, you’ve proved to be a loyal, kind friend. I can’t express how happy I am to know that now you’ve found a friend like that in your spouse. I wish both of you a lifetime of love and laughter. Cheers!”

Remember, a great maid of honor speech starts with the bride and ends with the couple. Share those anecdotes that speak to the bride’s personality and don’t be afraid to use a little humor.

In the days leading up to your speech, practice your public speaking skills so you can deliver your speech with confidence. Steer clear from taboo topics—this is about celebration, not airing dirty laundry.

As you stand before friends and family, remember: today you’re not just giving a toast—you’re weaving memories into every guest’s heart.

• Last Updated: March 22, 2024

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How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech—Template Included

Wondering how to write a maid of honor speech? This guide covers everything you need to know and includes a template to help you get started.

Your best friend is getting married , and she’s asked you to be her maid of honor—one of the most meaningful and important roles in helping your best friend bring her wedding daydreams to life. With this honor comes a number of important duties, and at the top of that list is delivering the maid of honor speech.

The maid of honor speech traditionally takes place at the wedding reception , but it’s possible you might deliver it at the rehearsal dinner. Regardless of when the speech will take place, it’s best to get started writing it at least three weeks before the wedding day. After all, a meaningful maid of honor speech isn’t something you can write up on your phone the morning of the wedding—it requires some thought, preparation, and maybe a round of edits or two.

If the task of giving a moving speech to a room full of people feels a bit nerve-wracking, don’t panic. We’ve broken down everything you need to know to craft the perfect speech from start to finish, along with how to keep your nerves at bay when it comes time to deliver it.

6 Tips to Prepare for Your Maid of Honor Speech

You don’t need to be a professional writer or orator to create a meaningful maid of honor speech. Use the tips below to get an idea of what to include and get an idea of the overall structure of a solid speech.

1. Introduce Yourself and Express Thanks

Begin your speech by introducing yourself and your relationship with the bride. Then, share a word of thanks for those who had a hand in planning the wedding —the bride’s family, the groom’s family, and anyone else who you feel should be mentioned.

2. Talk About the Bride

Now it’s time to get personal about the bride and your history together. You might share an anecdote about how you two met, what her friendship has meant to you over the years, or any other endearing story that illustrates why she’s so special. It’s best to focus this section of the speech on the bride before her partner came into the picture, which you can lead into in the next section.

3. Talk About Her Partner

Now is a good time to discuss the bride’s spouse. While you’re certainly the designated right-hand woman to the bride, remember that the focus of a maid of honor speech should be on celebrating the couple , the beauty of their relationship and their future together as newlyweds.

When thinking about what to say about her partner, you can share any number of special sentiments that you feel illustrate who they are and what they mean to the bride. You also might decide to talk about what you love about her partner, mention their greatest characteristics, or share a story about how much he or she means to the bride.

4. Talk About the Couple

While the last section focuses on the bride’s partner as an individual, use this section to talk about who they are as a couple. If you’re close friends with both partners, you might have some special memories to share looking back on the journey of their relationship. If not, you might talk about the impact the bride’s partner has had on her and how you saw her grow as their bond grew over time. Whatever you choose to speak about, be sure to keep the focus on the beauty of their relationship.

5. Share Encouragement or Advice for the Newlyweds’ Future

As you near the end of your speech, try closing with a word of encouragement or advice for the couple and their future together as newlyweds. After all, the whole point of the maid of honor speech is to celebrate the couple! You might include an inspirational quote or poem if you feel like it fits, but be sure to keep it short and sweet to avoid a long-winded reading.

6. Closing Toast

The closing of your speech should be short and sweet—simply share a closing remark to commemorate the happy couple. Then, invite the guests to raise their glasses in a toast to the newlyweds.

How to Nail Your Maid of Honor Speech

While the steps above are helpful in nailing the structure of your speech, there are a few additional tips to keep in mind that will help you write a compelling and meaningful speech.

Set Aside Reflection Time

Before you even attempt to write your speech, it’s a good idea to carve out some time to simply think and reflect. This can help kick off the creative process and get you into the right headspace as you ideate what you might want to include. Spend this time reflecting on the memories you share with the bride, and try to pinpoint any ideas or emotions that come to mind when you think of her. This way, you come away with a road map of all the major points you want to touch on in your speech.

Define Your Objective

As you’re planning your speech, it’s helpful to define your overall objective before you dive into the nitty gritty details and stories you’ll share. Think about the goal you want your speech to accomplish: is it to make the wedding guests laugh, cry, maybe both? Is the couple known for their sense of humor? Perhaps you add some comedic flair to your speech.

If you’ve been through a lot with the bride or want to touch on some more serious memories, perhaps you craft your speech to be more emotionally moving. In the end, defining your objective will help you find the direction your speech will take.

Don’t Go Overboard with Anecdotes

If you have a ton of history with the bride, you might have a miles-long list of heartwarming stories you want to share. However, one key to a compelling speech is keeping it short and sweet. A standard maid of honor speech should only be three to four minutes long, and you don’t want to risk boring the guests or taking the focus off of the celebration. To avoid this, choose one or two must-have memories or anecdotes that you know you want to include, and nix the rest.

Develop Your Story

Along with keeping things short and sweet, another key to writing a compelling maid of honor speech is to tell it like a story. Any story worth hearing has a defined beginning, middle and end. While you’re in control of the details that fill the story, you want to ensure that every detail aligns with the main point of your speech. Whatever you talk about should clearly tie back to the overall focus of the speech, which is celebrating the bond the couple shares and wishing them well for their new future together.

Be Authentic

The bride chose you as her maid of honor for a reason, so you shouldn’t feel like you have to be anything but yourself when you give your speech. Throw off any pressure you might feel to sound a certain way if it doesn’t ring true to you and your connection with the bride. A great maid of honor speech is about speaking openly and honestly about the bride and her partner—remember to write in the same way you’d speak to avoid sounding stiff or robotic.

Practice, Don’t Memorize

If you feel like you need to memorize your speech word for word, don’t! Instead, focus on practicing your speech in the weeks leading up to the wedding day. This way, the main points will be well committed to your memory and you won’t need to memorize it line by line. However, it’s still helpful to use a bulleted list of the main points when it’s time to give your speech—this way you don’t have to worry about losing track mid-speech.

When you’re practicing your speech, make sure you’re practicing out loud so you can get a feel for the overall flow and rhythm of what you plan to say. It’s also helpful to read it aloud to a friend or the other bridesmaids to get some outside perspective on how your speech sounds and any tweaks that might help it shine.

Maid of Honor Speech Template

Your maid of honor speech should be authentic and personal, and there’s a number of directions you might choose to take your speech in. If you’re stuck on where to begin, the template below is a great starting point to give you an idea of the general structure and flow of a maid of honor speech. Fill it in with your own words to personalize it according to you and your unique relationship with the bride!

“Hello everyone, I’m [name] and [bride’s name] maid of honor. I met [bride’s name] X years ago when [how you met]. When [bride] and I became friends, it was [personal anecdote about your relationship with the bride]. I’ll never forget [personal memory between you and the bride].

When [partner’s name] came into the picture, [personal anecdote about how you met their partner]. [Partner’s name] was [personal anecdote about the partner’s characteristics or favorite memory].

Watching their relationship grow over time has been [personal sentiments about the couple’s bond. I’ll always remember how [personal anecdote about the journey of their relationship]. Ever since then, I’ve seen [bride’s name] [sentiment about the impact of the couple’s relationship].

It’s a privilege to join with you all in honoring the marriage of [bride] and [partner], and I know I speak for everyone when I say we’re thrilled to stand by your side today and support you both as you enter your new life together. If there’s one piece of advice I’d share, it’s [word of advice or encouragement for the newlyweds]. Thank you both for showing us what it means to love unconditionally. Please raise a glass to [bride] and [partner]! May you two never stop loving each other, growing together, and showing up for each other today and every day. Cheers!”

Whether this is your first wedding speech or your 20th, feelings of nervousness are normal! With some dedicated time and practice (and a few deep breaths beforehand) you’ll be more than ready to nail your maid of honor speech. All that really matters is that your words come from the heart. After all, the couple might not remember every single word you share, but they’ll always remember the love and care that went into it.

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• Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception? How to Write a Wedding Toast Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech How to Write a Best Man Toast Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech What to Know About a Newlywed Toast Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips 60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech

Follow these expert tips to knock your maid of honor speech out of the park.

Photo by Janine Licare

In This Article

You've been asked to play a huge role in your best friend's wedding—maid of honor! But, the job comes with a slew of important tasks , including giving the maid of honor speech. While this is a moment to celebrate your friendship, the idea of getting up in front of a crowd can be nerve-wracking if you're not used to giving speeches.

As staunch advocates of BFF love, we've taken it upon ourselves to create a go-to guide for penning the perfect speech to see your bestie off on their new life with their partner. With a few tips and tricks along with plenty of practice, your maid of honor speech will go off without a hitch.

With expert insight from professional speechwriter Katelyn Peterson—founder of vow- and toast-writing company Wedding Words —and examples of real-life speeches, we have all the details you need. Read on for helpful tips and guidelines to deliver an absolutely unforgettable maid of honor speech .

Meet the Expert

Katelyn Peterson is a speech writer and the founder of vow- and toast-writing company Wedding Words .

Maid of Honor Speech Template

While every maid of honor speech will be different, we've put together an outline to get you started on yours.

Start with the bride; end with the couple.

Of everyone at the wedding, you have the best insight into how much your bestie's partner has changed them for the better. Your maid of honor speech needs to be about the friend you knew long before meeting their soulmate and then pivot to what role they have played in their life. Maybe your friend is even funnier now, or maybe you've simply never seen your BFF so happy. This is also a great way to incorporate their new spouse into the speech if you don't really know them that well; speak to the way that they complement each other or how your BFF's new spouse has made them a better person.

Pepper in anecdotes.

Stories do a better job of getting your point across than blanket statements do. "Each anecdote you share should have an underlying theme that ties all the short stories together," says Peterson. "Reveal that theme near the end of your speech , and you’ll achieve a strong emotional impact."

End with a positive outlook.

The nature of this speech is not so much about your relationship with your friend, but the bond the couple shares. Make sure all of the separate components of your toast draw a positive conclusion, ending in how happy the couple is together and your best wishes for their marriage .

Maid of Honor Speech Tips

Keep in mind these helpful tips from professional speechwriter Katelyn Peterson to ensure you nail your maid-of-honor toast .

Kick-start the creative process by writing down any memories , emotions, or ideas that make you think of your BFF. "I recommend free-writing for 20 minutes," says Peterson. "When you’re done with this exercise, you should have some quality material that you can weave into the form of a speech." This allows you to create a blueprint of all the major points you want to make—more or less creating a roadmap for your ideas—and then fill it in with supporting information.

Ditch Generic Praise

"Use entertaining and engaging stories to show the bride’s personality ," advises Peterson. There's a big difference between simply saying, "She is such a great friend!" versus telling a story that illustrates just that.

Half the guests may not know your BFF all that well, so use this moment to paint a picture of how amazing they are. Bring their character to life with details only you could know.

Remember it isn't about you.

While a lot of the anecdotes should be about your time with your friend, you should not be the focal point. After you briefly introduce yourself (remember: most of the people probably won't know who you are or your relation to the couple), you shouldn't be making any additional references to yourself. You're simply the vehicle to explain why the newlyweds are so fantastic.

Do not mention exes.

No one wants to be reminded of past relationships , particularly in front of their family, friends, and new life partner. Keep the tone of your speech positive, and it will reflect positively on you also. You don't want to come across as though you're trying to roast your friend.

Keep it short.

The longer your speech, the more opportunities you'll have for people to start losing attention. "Keep your speech under five minutes," suggests Peterson. "Anywhere between two to five minutes is great."

Be sure to pause for a few seconds after each joke to let the audience laugh. When you immediately start speaking right afterward, you won't give people a chance to laugh or even understand the next line. Keep in mind that starting the speech on a funny note can help you capture the attention of the audience for a minute or two, but it's the meaningful content that will keep them enthralled until the end. "Your goal should be to have guests laughing and wiping tears away by balancing humor with sincerity," says Peterson.

If you experience public-speaking jitters, try looking just above everyone’s head. This can minimize your anxiety while allowing guests to think you're looking right at them.

Don't use inside jokes.

If the joke or situation is something other wedding guests would have to be there to understand, avoid using it. If people don't understand the context behind it, it will probably go over their heads. It's okay to poke a little bit of fun at your friend, but keep it light. Don't say anything that would be embarrassing or make them feel uncomfortable.

"The more you recite your speech out loud, the more comfortable you’ll become," notes Peterson. Practice your speech twice a day, starting at least a week beforehand, and record yourself a couple of times so you can hear your pacing and tone. Rehearse the speech in front of friends, too, in order to see if your jokes get a laugh, and try practicing in a mirror to nail your physical presence.

How to Get Started

Here are a few questions to ask yourself to start brainstorming ideas for your speech.

• Who will be speaking before or after you, and how will this affect the content of your speech? (You might want to include a reference to their toast in your speech, thank them for an introduction, or introduce the next speaker.)
• What would your friend want their in-laws and newly acquired family to know about them, and how can you attest to those qualities or characteristics from your own experiences with them?
• What's a warm memory of the newlyweds that always makes you smile? (Ask yourself: If their relationship were a Hollywood movie trailer, what key moments would be featured?)
• When you picture the couple's life together in a few years (or from this moment forward), what do you see? Is there any advice you can give them for their lifelong journey ahead?
• Is there something you want to say to your bestie's new spouse? (Perhaps a few lighthearted tips on how to handle more trying situations that you've learned from your own experiences with them.)

Maid of Honor Speech Examples to Make Your Own

If you're feeling stuck, here are three examples of speeches from real bridesmaids to inspire your own.

"Good evening, everyone. I’m Cami, the maid of honor and the bride’s best friend. Over the past 15 years, I’ve witnessed Madison prioritize everyone else’s happiness, but today, we get to honor hers. With Madison being my most fun-loving friend, I knew she’d be down to join me on a two-week adventure traveling throughout Europe. We lived together, but nothing cements a friendship quite like sharing a full-size bed in dingy hostels from the Netherlands to Spain. Madison’s luggage kept breaking, and she went through four suitcases in 14 days! There we were, strolling down a busy street in Madrid and Madison’s clothes were falling out of her over-packed suitcase, painting the path behind us with her sundresses and socks. But she never let her rundown luggage ruin the trip. She just kept rolling with it. Literally. I can always depend on Madison to roll with any situation, to show up for the people that she loves, and to have a good time.

But the truth is everyone in this room is better for knowing you, Madison. You love so deeply, selflessly, and unconditionally. And I know that Pete is the best partner for Madison because I’ve seen him mirror these traits for her. No matter what may come your way, your combined patience, resilience, and love will make you an unstoppable team. And most importantly, I know you two will continue to keep rolling with it . Cheers!" —Cami

"I’m Ashley and welcome! I was introduced to Sarah through a mutual friend to evaluate if she would be a fit as my future roommate. I showed up to that first dinner wearing a casual sundress and flats. Meanwhile, Sarah walked in with voluminous curls, smoky eyes , red lipstick, and a smile that showed me she deserved that Miss Florida title in ’04. I just thought, 'Who is this girl?' Over the next two hours, I learned that this girl was the coolest, funniest person and that I had to live with her. We moved in and it was truly an immediate fit from watching the same shows to downing bottles of the same wine. Despite our homebody nature, we did enjoy our Saturday nights running around the city. One night after several margaritas, Sarah and I found ourselves locked out of our house. So we came up with the best plan we could imagine: Let’s cannonball into our pool. There we were: Two tequila-loving girls cannonballing to see who could create the biggest splash. From that night on, whenever we went out, we’d ask ourselves one key question: 'Is it going to be a cannonball in the pool kind of night?'

And just like she’s always filled the gap in our friend group—we know that John has entered her life to level her out in the best of ways, too. Let’s raise a glass to Sarah and John! May your life together be full of cannonball-in-the-pool kind of nights." —Ashley

"Hi, my name is Makena and I’m the bride’s younger sister and maid of honor . As I look at Winnie and Miles today, I see two people in the most loving, trustworthy, and nurturing relationship I’ve ever witnessed. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to me that even on her wedding day, Winnie is teaching me about life and love. Because the truth is Winnie has been my lifelong teacher. She’s the one who taught me how to read and how to ride a bike, but my most memorable teaching moment was when I was 11 years old.  We had this mutual understanding—or so I thought—that we would not read each other’s journals. But I, of course, read hers and naively assumed she did not read mine. I learned the truth when I opened my journal one day to see an entire page filled with Winnie’s handwriting. There in the middle of my journal was a critique from my sister detailing out how I could improve my writing.

I know that if it weren’t for my sister, I would not be the person I am today. I’m inspired daily by the woman she is. Her confidence is unshakable, her excitability is contagious, and her determination is awe-inspiring. Winnie will finally get to experience what I’ve felt like my entire life with her. She’ll be cared for, unconditionally loved, and will learn every day with Miles as her lifelong teacher through love. Please raise a glass to Winnie and Miles! May you two never stop learning from each other as you continue to love each other." —Makena

First things first: Don't overcomplicate it! Stay authentic to yourself and keep it simple by telling a story, sharing why you love the bride, and toasting the newlyweds.

Keep it short and sweet! Having a two to five minute speech that is both sentimental and humorous is the best way to honor the couple in a way that is engaging and memorable .

Close out your speech with a simple, light-hearted joke and a toast to the newlyweds . This will create the perfect opportunity for a combined cheer and chuckle from the crowd .

A Guide to Wedding Reception Toasts

Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception?

How to Write a Wedding Toast

Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech

How to Write a Best Man Toast

Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech

What to Know About a Newlywed Toast

Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips

60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

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To us here at Modern MOH, the writing and delivery of the maid of honor speech is the most sacred duty of them all. We feel this is your true time to shine and the greatest opportunity to show your bestie just how much her happiness means to you. By taking the time to construct a heartfelt and well-written speech, then delivering it to the best of your ability, you will help make your bride’s wedding day all the more perfect.

And while we doubt we were your first stop on the “ how to write a maid of honor speech ” search train, we do hope to be your final destination. You see, unlike most articles you’ll find on the subject of maid of honor speeches, we’re actually going to give it to you straight. No vaguely basic outlines or generically boring examples, just the cold hard facts.

Because we have some serious experience in the toast department, and if there’s one thing we’ve learned about writing a killer maid of honor speech, it’s this: there is no secret formula, no one best way . How could there be? Each and every relationship between a maid of honor and a bride is different from the next, just as each and every memory is uniquely yours. 

Lastly, we know the thought of having to give a wedding toast in front of a large group of people may be terrifying for most, that’s why we’re here to teach you a thing or two to ease those nerves. From start to finish, we have all the tips and tricks you need to know to bring the house down.

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech in 5 Simple Steps

1. define your overall objective.

Before you begin writing your maid of honor speech, you must first define your objective. In other words, you need to have a goal you’re looking to accomplish. For example, are you hoping to make wedding guests laugh? Cry? Both? Do you want to talk about your history with the bride, about how you met the groom, or what their relationship as a couple means to you?

Knowing the answers to these questions will help you figure out the direction you should take when writing your wedding toast.

If you find yourself struggling to define your objective, simply think of your relationship with both the bride and groom. Do they have a great sense of humor? Is your time together spent mostly joking around and laughing? If so, try taking a comedic approach to your toast by cracking a few funny jokes along the way.

Or maybe you and your bride have been through some very serious times together that you want to share, in which case your speech may be much more emotionally moving. The great part about this objective is that it’s your own, so there is no one right or best way to go about it.

MODERN MOH TIP:  Touch on a little bit of everything. Start strong with a joke or two and finish out with a sentimental toast.  While there is no exact formula to it, a truly good maid of honor speech is both funny enough to get wedding guests laughing and moving enough to bring a tear to their eye. Secondly, don’t spend so much time talking about your history with the bride that you forget to talk about the groom. Even if you don’t have your own personal memories with your best friend’s new hubby, that doesn’t mean he should be left out of your speech. Instead, talk about their relationship as a couple and what it means to you, including your wishes for the bride and groom’s future together. 

2. Decide on Your Point of View

The key to writing a killer of maid of honor speech is to not think of it as a speech, but instead a story. And as the narrator of this particular story, it’s up to you to determine the point of view from which you tell it. While it may seem obvious that you’d write from the first-person POV, there are definitely some benefits to switching it up.

To begin with, writing from a third-person POV will give your toast a unique twist and a more story-like feel. For example, instead of saying “Taylor and I met on the school bus in the third grade and she’s been my best friend ever since” , you could say “When Taylor was in the third grade, she met a little girl on the school bus who remains her best friend to this day” .

Like the idea, but don’t think you can write an entire speech that way? No problem. Unlike what you were taught in grade school, you have the freedom to switch between differing points of view when telling your story. If you haven’t caught on yet, let us reiterate: there is no right or wrong when it comes to writing your speech.

MODERN MOH TIP: Take advantage of switching up points of view. Start with narrating from the first person point of view, especially if it’s easier for you to tell the history between you and the bride that way. When it comes time to talk about the couple, tell their story from an outsider’s perspective. If you do decide to go this route, don’t get so crazy with it that you start confusing your audience. The whole point of using different points of view is to enhance your maid of honor speech, not complicate it.

3. Determine Your Must-Haves

Now that you’ve defined your objective and decided on your POV, it’s time to determine your must-haves. By must-haves, we mean the anecdotes you absolutely want to include in your maid of honor speech. For instance, is there a particularly good memory you have with the bride that you definitely want to share with wedding guests? Or maybe you were there when the bride and groom met and you want to tell your side of the couple’s story?

Determining your must-haves before you begin writing your toast will guarantee you don’t forget to feature them. Not to mention, it will keep you from going off track when it comes time to put pen to paper. If you’re having trouble narrowing it down, keep this in mind: it’s much better to have one or two epic stories than a mix of mediocre ones.

MODERN MOH TIP: Don’t be that maid of honor that goes on and on about memories and “funny” inside jokes you have with the bride (no wedding guest wants to hear it, trust us). Instead, tell one or two really good stories that portray your friendship and then move on to her relationship with the groom and their history as a couple. Too many MOHs make the mistake of making their toast all about them and not enough about the couple whose wedding they are supposed to be celebrating. If you want to talk about yourself in front of a big audience, try Youtube.

4. Develop Your Story From Beginning to End

As we mentioned before, the key to writing a killer maid of honor speech is to tell it like a story. And just like any good story, you must develop it from beginning to middle to end (think along the lines of “ once upon a time ” to “ they lived happily ever after ”). While it’s entirely up to you to decide what constitutes the beginning, middle, and end of your particular story, you should avoid big jumps in time. In other words, do your best to develop it in chronological order so you don’t confuse wedding guests.

For instance: Start by telling the story of how you and the bride met, continue on with a memory you have of the bride and groom, and finish with a toast for the couple. Again, there is no magic formula when it comes to writing a maid of honor speech, but having a clear and concise storyline is highly suggested.

MODERN MOH TIP: Don’t be predictable. Chances are you and your best friend didn’t cross paths in some epic way (especially if you’re sisters), so skip the generic “this is how we met” story. Instead, dive right into a funny/crazy/holy s*$&! moment to get the crowd’s attention. And don’t be boring with your finale either. No generic “cheers to the Mr. & Mrs.” toast, we know you can do better than that. Your goal should be to receive a standing ovation from the couple and their wedding guests, not a polite golf clap.

5. Describe Your Characters in Detail

We can’t stress how important this final step is when it comes to writing your maid of honor speech. Seriously, taking the extra step to describe your characters in detail is what differentiates the bland from the bomb. And just so we’re clear, by characters we mean the bride and groom, and by detail we mean elaboration. For example, instead of saying “Taylor is such a great friend, she’s always been there for me whenever I needed her” , you should say “I’ve never met a more loving and loyal person than Taylor, she truly exemplifies what it means to be a best friend” .

These extra tweaks may seem insignificant to you, but they’re exactly the lines that will resonate with your audience and more importantly, the couple. And if writing isn’t your strong suit, don’t worry. Simply speak from the heart, you’ll be surprised at how well your final product turns out.

MODERN MOH TIP: Use a thesaurus (seriously, we do it all the time). It’s a good way to spice up your word choice and will stop you from repeating yourself. On the flip side, don’t feel like you have to use a ton of fancy words- you want to sound like yourself after all, not Shakespeare. Lastly, don’t be afraid to throw a bit of alliteration in there. It brings character to your writing and will make your toast much more memorable ( see what we did there? )

How to End a Maid of Honor Speech

Now that you’ve got the beginning and middle of your speech outlined, it’s time to work on your ending. As this will be your final moment with the mic, your goal should be to make it a memorable one.

One hard-fast rule on ending any maid of honor speech is to address both the bride and groom as a newlywed couple and offer your best wishes for a happy marriage. The easiest way to accomplish this is by raising a toast.

As far as the contents of your toast, it’s up to you if you want to use your own words or prefer to recite a heartfelt quote . To help you decide, ask yourself the following question:

If the answer is yes, by all means, write up your own personal toast. If the answer is no, start searching for the perfect quote.

MODERN MOH TIP:  Select a few possible endings for your maid of honor speech and do test runs through them all to see which flows the best. Oftentimes it’s easier to decide based on how you deliver the words than how they sound in your head.

Have you checked out all our tips and still need help writing the perfect Maid of Honor speech?

Not to worry, Bridesmaid for Hire can help you craft an amazing, personal speech instantly!

Don’t believe it? Give it a try and see for yourself!

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21 Comments

Suggestions for the maid of honor when she’s the mother of the bride…? I don’t wanna get too mushy I want to keep it lighthearted and fun but I want it to be special.

What a super special time for you and your daughter!

I would definitely recommend starting with some funny childhood stories, especially if you they feature any family members or friends who are attending. Pulling the audience in is the best way to capture their attention!

I totally get not wanting to get too mushy, but as her mom, you definitely have the opportunity for an extra hard tug at the heartstrings (and I absolutely suggest doing so!) Whether you talk about how you’ve envisioned this day since she was a little girl, or how you felt when you realized your daughter had met ‘the one’, speaking from the heart as her mom will add the perfect sentimental touch to your speech.

Good luck with everything- I have total faith that you’ll knock it out of the park 🙂

What should I write when I’m the step daughter of the bride

Hi Charlotte,

That is so sweet of your stepmother to ask you to be her maid of honor! During your speech, I would be sure to tell her how much your relationship as stepmother and stepdaughter means to you, as well as what her relationship with your father means to your family.

You are in a unique position that you have been such a close part of their relationship, so I would use that to your advantage!

Good luck 🙂

What if I’m the maid of honor and need to write this speech, but really dislike the groom?

Unfortunately, this situation is more common than you may think and my advice is always the same- do not under any circumstances let your feelings about the groom be known during your speech.

Even if you can’t find it within yourself to say something nice specifically about the groom, this does not mean you should ignore him altogether. Simply include a few lines about the two as a couple, keeping it light and positive.

I’m the sister of the groom and barely know the bride! She and my brother live several states away and have visited a total of about 6 days (2 long weekends)- so there are no real stories or experiences about us. How do I pull this off?? Any tips would be wonderful!!

This is definitely a difficult position to be in, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still deliver a great speech!

My best recommendation would be to reach out to your brother and future SIL’s closest friends to ask for any stories they may have about them as a couple (e.g. how they met, a favorite memory, etc.) Just because you don’t have your own experiences to share doesn’t mean you can’t speak to their relationship through the voice of their loved ones.

Also, don’t make a point to say you don’t know the bride very well. Instead, say something along the lines of “I know that living far away from each other makes it difficult to spend time together, but I truly look forward to getting to know you better as not just a sister-in-law, but a friend.”

I hope this helps in some way! Good luck 🙂

Help! What if I’ve never met the groom? We’ve been long distance best friends for a while now.

For those MOHs who have never met/don’t know the groom very well, I always recommend that they talk to the bride for some insight. Start by asking your BFF about how they met, her favorite memories as a couple, and their hopes/dreams as husband and wife.

You can also reach out to the best man or other groomsmen to get their perspective of the groom and his relationship with your friend. Just because you don’t have your own experiences to share doesn’t mean you can’t speak to their relationship through the voice of their loved ones.

Hope this helps! Good luck 🙂

So, the bride and myself have only been friends for about a year and a half. We are so close though, it feels like we’ve known each other forever. How do I go about talking about our friendship when most of the suggestions are childhood memories or having known the bride for so long. Thanks!

Hi Brittany! I think the fact that you’ve only known each other for a year and a half, but are close enough to be playing such an important role in your friend’s wedding is so special. I would totally highlight that in your speech as a way to show the audience how welcoming and obviously lovable the bride is.

And just because you don’t have a long history together does not mean that you and your friend don’t have fun memories for you to reminisce on during your speech. You can also talk about your hopes and plans for the future of your friendship!

I hope this helps and good luck! 🙂

I feel like writing this speech for my sister’s wedding should be so easy, but I am struggling hard. I have so many funny stories but can’t figure out how to tie one or two of them together to create a wonderful speech. Please help!

Sometimes writing such an important speech for someone you love is the opposite of easy because you put so much pressure on yourself to make it perfect! I would recommend choosing stories that the audience can easily follow along with without feeling totally left out or lost. In other words, don’t rely on stories that feature an inside joke between you and your sister or you’ll be the only two laughing at the end.

I hope this helps! Good luck 🙂

Help!! My sister is getting married next September so I have some time but of course she asked me to be her MOH but her best friend had her as her MOH and I thought she was going to have her be hers in return since they are basically sisters and have known each other since they were very little. I love that I’m her MOH but is it possible to have two?? How should I go about bringing it up? I’m 6 years younger than my sister so her best friend knows more about her and her friends and the groom even since she was there watching them fall in love. I feel like I’m at a disadvantage. I don’t want to not be her MOH but I also rather share the title with her best friend that way we could make a killer speech??

Hi Kait, this is a tough position to be in! If you are simply worried about not making a great MOH speech, you could just let your sister know your fears and ask her if she would mind you bringing her friend in for some insight and inspiration.

On the other hand, if you truly feel that you could be a better MOH all around with your sister’s friend’s help, then I think it’s totally ok to let your sister know this. Just be sure to emphasize that it’s not because you don’t want to be her MOH at all, but that you really could use the support of her very close friend to make her wedding experience the best that it can be.

I hope this helps! If you have any more questions or concerns, feel free to let me know.

My big sister is getting married in September and she asked me to be here MOH. I’m struggling to write my speech for her because I dont have any fond memories with her, and we weren’t exactly the closest due to past occurrences. I’m very nervous with public speaking as is, so this is adding a lot more stress than I’d like. I’m lost of how to write a speech that’s short but meaningful.

Hi Beth, so sorry to hear that you’re stressing out about your speech! It can definitely be challenging to write a speech when you don’t have a lot of fond memories to touch on, but it’s certainly not impossible.

Since you and your sister have had a difficult past, my advice would be to instead focus the speech on the relationship she has with the groom. Keep it short by telling one good story about them as a couple, and wrap it up with your well wishes for their future as husband and wife. As long as you speak from the heart and sound sincere, your speech will be very meaningful!

Hi! I’m such a procrastinator and I’m the MOH of my best friend of 21 years and she is getting married this weekend! How do I make my speech a short and sweet one but also adding a few memories? I feel like there is just SO much to say lol

Hi Leslie, How lovely that you’ve been friends for so long! I can imagine that you must have a ton of stories that you can share, so your challenge will be sorting through all the memories! Maybe start by jotting down some of your top stories that you’d like to share, keeping in mind to avoid inside jokes.

If you’d like to keep things short, you can start with one of your funny childhood memories with your BFF to get the audience engaged. Perhaps then move on to discussing the bride and groom as a couple – think about how they met, perhaps? Then you can end things off with a toast for the future of the couple.

I hope this helps! Best of luck with the wedding!

Some great points, thank you! It could be good to edit the article to be open to bride-bride; groom-groom etc so the wording is more inclusive.

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Public Speaking Tips & Speech Topics

Maid of Honor Speech [What to Say + Outline + Template]

Jim Peterson has over 20 years experience on speech writing. He wrote over 300 free speech topic ideas and how-to guides for any kind of public speaking and speech writing assignments at My Speech Class.

Giving a maid of honor speech is an honor – and also a responsibility.

If you’re invited to be maid of honor at a family member or friend’s wedding, you have a huge role in the wedding ceremony. Writing the perfect wedding toast or speech can often seem like the hardest part.

Coming up with the perfect toast for this special day is much easier when you have sample speeches to be inspired by. We’ve compiled an essential list of maid of honor speech examples, from roast to religious.

Read on for our step-by-step guide to writing a maid of honor speech, and then watch the examples below. Now you’re ready to prepare a great speech with confidence.

In this article:

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech

Maid of honor speech topics blueprint, maid of honor speech outline, maid of honor speech examples.

Can We Write Your Speech?

Get your audience blown away with help from a professional speechwriter. Free proofreading and copy-editing included.

The Maid of Honor, sometimes also called the Bridesmaid or even the Matron of Honor, speaks after the Best Man. Remember, the audience has to listen to lots of speeches before and after you.

So, my tip number one is: Keep it brief and simple; for your own utility and the convenience of the guests.

Maid of honor speeches can take many different forms. They might be funny or sweet, creative or traditional . Often, the speech will incorporate different elements, like humor and nostalgia, to hit all the right notes. Most speeches are 5 to 10 minutes long, but wedding speeches can also take many shapes, from short toasts to extended performances.

These simple tips will help you write a maid of honor speech that’s a perfect fit for the wedding day.

Begin Early

When you need to write a maid of honor speech, you’ll want to start early.

Begin the brainstorming process as soon as you’re asked to be maid of honor or bridesmaid. This might involve jotting down fun memories or an embarrassing story you’ve shared with the bride. You can also consider talking about the groom, the bride and groom’s relationship, or how they met.

Write down some ideas early on and then take a few days or weeks to let them percolate. When you come back to your ideas, the speech outline will start to become more clear.

Try a Quote

A great way to start or end your speech can be with a beautiful quote that has meaning for the wedding day. It can be funny, emotional, or poignant. Just make sure it’s something that has meaning for the newlyweds and that wedding guests can resonate with as well.

Tell Stories

The best speeches combine quotes or big ideas about love with real stories. Stories are fun for guests to listen to, and give your speech a solid foundation.

Choosing the right stories about the bride, or the bride and groom, is important. Do you want your speech to be funny, inspiring, or touching? The stories you tell will help set the tone. Think about details: the sights, sounds, or sensations you remember will keep the audience’s attention. Just don’t let it get too long – most speeches should be 10 minutes or less.

Be Prepared

Your speech will go much better if you’ve practiced ahead of time – more than once. The more you practice, the more confident you will feel when the big day comes.

Practice reading your speech, and time yourself to make sure it’s the length you want. Keep in mind that at the wedding ceremony or reception there will be pauses for laughter or applause, which will make your speech a few minutes longer.

You might want to videotape yourself practicing, or even practice in front of a friend or family member to get some feedback on your delivery. Just make sure not to give it to the bride ahead of time – your speech should come as a surprise on the wedding day.

Don’t forget to bring notes, too. Even if you never actually look at them, they will help you feel more comfortable when you take the microphone, and can save you if you draw a blank when it’s time to start.

A heartfelt speech is better than a perfect one.

Don’t be afraid that you’re going to stumble over a word or mess up somehow. If you’ve practiced ahead of time and drafted your speech early, you’ve done all the preparation you need.

Take the stage with confidence, knowing that little mistakes and imperfections can sometimes make a speech that much more meaningful because it’s genuine. If you laugh or cry, the wedding guests are probably going to laugh or cry with you. Keep your sense of humor if the mic cuts out or you stumble over a word. Enjoy the moment!

Here are our maid of honor speech tips in a sample template plus the speaking do’s and don’ts in a matrimonial ceremony based on their complimentary life styles. You are invited and do not know what to say?

Use our template for outlining thoughts, ideas and facts about the bridal couple. I will show you what you should mention and what the text should focus on. If you are not an experienced talker: relax, you do not have to say much, less is more is often said and well put!

But always: public speeches should be from the heart! Be enthusiastic and sincere, but do not exaggerate.

Maid Of Honor Speech Template

INTRODUCTION

• Tell who you are for the ones who don’t know.
• Thank your friend for asking you to be in this wedding.
• How long have you known the bride and groom?
• Why were you selected to accept the honor giving the oral?
• Why did you accept the invitation?
• How did the two of them met?
• What did you think when you saw their friendship became more serious? Reflect on their complimentary life styles. Approach this from the female side. Be tasteful. The best man is at the grooms’ side … so his job is to cover that part, not you 🙂
• Can you come up with a funny story that illustrates the personality of the wedding couple? Think about characterizing sweet, inspiring, exciting or just average daily events or moments.
• Can you come up with a hilarious anecdote based on a real life situation?
• Conclude this part of this special wedding address with letting them know that’s why you were so happy when they announced their wedding. As I said before: keep it short. Stick to one funny story. Ask others if they really like it, if it’s funny enough to share.

THE CEREMONY

• Stress the importance of the matrimonial ceremony. Give your personal view.
• Use a famous quote about marriage, love or the future.
• Relate a short poem to the couple. Quotes and poems are a good starting point for inspiration.
• Wish the bride and groom a long and happy life.
• Express your love and best wishes for the future.
• If they have had hard times, then mention it briefly in one poetic sentence. Not more. Focus on this happy day!
• You can thank and toast to the bride and groom on behalf of the bride, but only if she asked you to do so.

Do’s And Don’ts

• Bring notes, know what you want to say. Too much improvisation can lead to babbling, stumbling or a too long maid of honor speech.
• Do not get too personal. Ask others if the stories you want to tell will not embarrass the bride and groom or the guests. Check double check is the motto.
• Do not come up with negative or depressing speech topics. Kee it nice and friendly for all.
• Avoid sexual tinted expressions, political engagement or religion issues and hold back your horses when you want to mention actual news or political stories.
• Read a draft out loud in front of somenone else and ask for opinions. Alter with the recommendations in mind.

Although maid of honor speeches can take many forms, having a classic speech outline will help you get started. If you’re not sure what to write, follow these simple steps and you’ll be able to write a beautiful, traditional speech.

1. Introduce Yourself

You can’t count on all the wedding guests knowing who you are or how you know the bride. Make time early in your speech to mention your name, what your relationship to the bride is, and how long you’ve known each other.

2. Thank People

Weddings can be expensive, stressful, and difficult to plan. It’s good to take a moment in your speech to thank the parents and other notable guests who helped make the wedding day happen.

3. Tell Stories

Next, you can launch into a story of your choice. There are many different directions you can take this part of the speech. An embarrassing story you share with the bride can get guests laughing, while a touching anecdote about the newlywed couple’s relationship might make happy tears flow.

4. Add a Quote

You can add a meaningful quote anywhere in your speech. The quotes you choose should have meaning to both you and the bride (and maybe the groom as well), and also be relatable to the other guests in attendance. If it’s an inside joke or an obscure reference that not many people will get, you may want to leave it out.

5. Give Heartfelt Emotion

Even the funniest roasts of the bride often have a moment when the speech becomes touching. No matter what the tone of your speech is, it doesn’t hurt to take a moment and recognize the beauty of the day. The best speeches often aren’t all funny or all sentimental – they’re a mix of both.

6. Finish Strong

Your ending will be the part of the speech guests are most likely to remember. Give a strong ending, whether it’s a quote, a final story, or proposing a toast to the bride and groom.

Sister Maid of Honor Speech

This sister wedding speech celebrates all of the fun of watching your family get married. The bride’s sister starts out with humor, telling family memories through a funny lens. However, she quickly gets emotional as she recounts how much her sister means to her.

“You’ve been a great mentor. You’ve been a beautiful impact on my life, and you taught me that there’s beauty in everyone no matter what they do.”

Best Friend Matron of Honor Speech

The best friend of the bride for over 10 years, this matron of honor has nothing but praise for the bride. She recounts how she approved right away upon meeting the groom, and how excited she was upon learning of their engagement.

“You have really, truly become like my sister. I knew I’d be telling you how beautiful you looked, but seeing you next to your handsome groom, you really are absolutely breathtaking.”

Short Matron of Honor Speech

This short speech starts with a funny memory of the bride talking about the groom years before their engagement. In just a minute and a half, the matron of honor brings both laughter and heartfelt emotion to her speech.

“Speaking from experience, marriage is a wild ride. But when you find that right partner, you never want the ride to end.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRniSDMhWgM

Maid of Honor Toast

In a fun, beautiful toast to the bride, this bride’s sister thanks guests for coming, and then launches into memories of growing up together. She shouts out to both the bride and the groom for being important parts of her life.

“Katie is so much more than a big sister to me  – she’s my best friend, my mentor, and the unfailing reminder that sometimes being a sister is even better than being a princess.”

Matron of Honor Speech

This matron of honor gets guests laughing by pulling out a scroll to read from at the beginning of her speech. She recounts the embarrassing story of how the bride stole her spot on the varsity team when they first met. However, their friendship quickly blossomed, and the matron of honor touches on many of the fun things they did together as kids.

“I had the time of my life growing up with you.”

Funny Maid of Honor Speech

In a funny, lighthearted speech, this maid of honor recounts growing up with the bride, and even planning her wedding as little girls. The maid of honor also turns to the groom and thanks him for being the perfect partner for her friend. She fills the speech with memories, from embarrassing to sweet, and ends with a song for a truly memorable wedding moment.

“You’re all the things I hoped for my best friend and more, and I’m so grateful you found her and that you love her the way she really deserves.”

Roast Speech

This maid of honor kept guests laughing with her deadpan delivery of jokes in this short speech. Her stand-up comedy is perfect for the occasion, and she pokes fun at everyone from the bride to the groom to herself.

“When I first sat down and started thinking about what I want to say here tonight, I kept thinking to myself, ‘I can’t believe Erin’s getting married…in less than an hour. No, I’m kidding, I had it written before breakfast.”

Christian Maid of Honor Speech

A sweet speech from the bride’s best friend hits the right notes in a short amount of time. She compares the couple’s love to being like the love of Christ because it is so strong and so beautiful.

“The love that these two share is so strong, it doesn’t need a thousand stories, it doesn’t need a thousand words; it just radiates from these two.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKKwOBW_8xY

Creative Maid of Honor Speech

This fun maid of honor speech starts with the bride’s sister recalling dancing to pop songs as a kid with her mom, who was pregnant with the bride. Then, she uses a musical interlude to tell the story of the bride’s life from a sister’s perspective. In a mashup of pop music covers, the maid of honor gives a great performance that gets the wedding guests clapping in time.

“[My mom and I] danced around the house to Cyndi Lauper’s ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. And lo and behold, 9:30 am on day 9…DeeDee arrives. Apparently she also just wanted to have fun.”

Bridesmaid Speech

In this genuine, sweet speech, the bridesmaid’s excitement about the happy couple’s new marriage is truly evident. Her fun while holding the microphone is contagious to all the guests.

“I’m just so excited to be here, to witness the true love that is so evident between Taylor and Niko.”

Touching Maid of Honor Speech

This heartfelt, emotional maid of honor speech was given by a college friend of both the bride and the groom. She recounts the story of how she first met the bride, and then tells the bride and groom’s love story as she saw it unfold.

“It was obvious there was something truly amazing between the two of them. Four months of courting and a very, very, very confused Mark later, Mara finally accepted his proposal to be boyfriend and girlfriend – and the rest is history.”

Bridesmaid Toast

These bridesmaids toast the bride in song form. They celebrate the happy couple in their own words, and then shout out to notable wedding guests, keeping everyone entertained the entire time.

“Love is the reason we’re all here – that’s what you toasted for.”

Maid of Honor Speech

The maid of honor speech can be just as hilarious and emotional as the best man speech . Amusing, creative speeches like this one might get a standing ovation. The maid of honor uses a numerical countdown to format her speech, ending with the number one which is, of course, the bride.

“At the end of the day, you’re always gonna have that one person who’s in your corner, who’s your personal cheerleader.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uX9Y6OhkH1s

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How To Write A Maid Of Honor Speech (Examples And Advice)

Some of the best speeches at weddings are the maid of honor speeches. You’ve been chosen for this special role because you know things about the bride that her parents don’t (and maybe some that should stay that way..ahem). You’ve also probably been through thick and thin together. 

You may want to share some kind words about the groom, but it’s what you say to the bride during your speech that will matter the most at this time of transition in her life.

She needs to know you’re her Girl Friday, and you’ve got her back through every milestone. Your maid of honor speech is one of the best ways to deliver that message. 

So, bearing all of the above in mind, you might be feeling apprehensive about your speech. After all, she chose YOU to be her best bestie on her big day and everyone’s going to be waiting with bated breath for your words of wisdom and hilarious anecdotes from the times you’ve spent together.

Well, we’re to tell you there’s zero reason to worry about your speech. It’s your best friend’s wedding day and all she wants is to have you by her side. No one is expecting you to deliver a Shakespearean soliloquy or do a stand-up comedy act. Just deliver heartfelt words and you’ll be golden. We promise. To help you put together a great speech, we’ve put together this handy guide. Keep reading for useful advice, a template for your speech, and some inspiring examples of maid of honour speeches.

Rules and Etiquette

Before you get started on your cue cards, there are a few things to get out of the way in terms of etiquette.

Keep it clean

We put this one first because sometimes it’s soooo hard to keep it PG when we’ve got so much hilarious dirt on our best girl (especially after a few drinks at the open bar). 

Try to refrain, though. Obviously, her parents are there, his parents are there, and who knows how many other family members with ears on you. 

It could make it super awkward if everyone heard about what happened at the bachelorette party. Let the best man commit that faux pas; it’s entirely possible that he will. 

Do your homework

You probably already know who is on the guest list, but you may not know some of the guests’ plus ones. If you can, find out about who’s coming that you don’t know. You don’t want to run the risk of offending someone or making them uncomfortable if the subject matter steers toward one of the big four topics to avoid. Keep reading for more on those.

Watch out for touchy topics

Best to steer clear of money issues unless they flatter the bride and groom. Definitely best to steer clear of politics. And definitely, definitely leave family dirt in the ground. 

There’s nothing more awkward than accidentally (or purposefully) calling someone on the carpet for family strife. Everyone there probably already knows that her dad’s new wife threw a tantrum and made a scene at Thanksgiving. But leave it unsaid. No matter how funny it was.

Suppose the wedding had a religious ceremony, and the bride/groom’s families are religious. In that case, that may be something to mention if it is relevant to you, too. Just be sensitive and keep it as inclusive as possible. 

So to recap. Money, politics, religion, and family drama – the BIG FOUR no-go topics. 

IF YOU REMEMBER NOTHING ELSE, REMEMBER THIS:

NO jokes about divorce.

NO jokes about exes. 

All righty, beyond that…

Keep the comedy coming

Everyone loves a funny wedding speech, and you’re among the top three who have the best opportunity to give one. If you’ve had any fun together at all (which obviously you have, or you wouldn’t be the maid of honor), you’ll have a virtual goldmine of funny stories about the bride. Again, as long as they’re PG, serve ’em up.

If comedy isn’t your strong suit, no biggie. A moving tribute to her, her new husband, and how great they are together is just as entertaining when it’s well-spoken. 

Watch your time

Unfortunately, no matter how many great stories you could tell, you’ve only got a short time to speak. Time yourself after you’ve written out your speech to make sure it’s no longer than seven minutes. An ideal speech will be five minutes or less. 

Don’t get too emotional- you’ve got mascara to think about!

Oh jeez, this one will probably be harder than keeping it PG. Keep some hankies tucked away, but try to laugh through the tears of joy. Some people get awkward and just don’t know how to deal with it when other people cry. 

Make An Outline

Right. Standard etiquette out of the way. Time to start writing it all down. Start with an outline, then round out the details after you’ve got the bones to your speech figured out. 

Introduce yourself

This is an important opener, as not everyone may know you yet. Superfast: who you are, and how you are related to the bride and groom.

If there’s a person or two you feel deserves special recognition and would like to thank, go ahead, but make it quick. Usually, it’s up to the parentals and groom to thank everyone for coming. 

Include a little bit about how you met. Were you friends right out of the gate? Is there a funny story about how you didn’t gel at first?

Talk about what makes you so tight close and what you bond over. Tell stories about some of the adventures you’ve shared. 

Talk about the groom

Make sure you take some time to talk about her new husband! Share a recollection of your first time meeting and your impressions of him. This is an excellent time for funny stories too, and it’s also the perfect time to outline what you love about the groom and how happy you are that he makes her happy. 

Talk about the bride

Now is when the waterworks will probably begin. Try to keep it together as you talk about all of the things that make her extraordinary. Let her know how much you appreciate her. Tell everyone what she means to you and what a great friend she is. 

If there are things you’re particularly proud of her for, things like accomplishments, acts of selflessness, all those great things, now is the time to let her know. 

Share some thoughts about them as a couple

Why are you so glad they’re together? What makes them so great for each other? What is your wish for them in the future? 

If you’re already married, you can talk about all the things you love about marriage and impart those wishes on her. 

Raise a toast

Here’s an excellent opportunity to let her know (briefly) how honored you are to be chosen as maid of honor and invite everyone to raise a toast to the newlyweds. If you’ve got a closer for this one, leave it with the toast, or you could say something simple like “To happily ever afters. Thanks for sharing yours with us.” 

Maid Of Honor Speech Examples

You’ve got your outline done and now you just need to put the final touches on your speech and master the delivery. Easy peasy! Hey, you’ve got this sista, we know it and you should too. But if you need some extra confidence-boosting inspiration, we strongly suggest you check out these awesome maid of honour speeches. If these gals can do it, we know you can too! 

Sisterly Love and Laughs 

Love this sister’s speech. It’s so funny and heartfelt, it was fantastic. And it was all a smidge over four minutes. Masterful. 

Hilarious and So Well Delivered! 

This speech is nothing short of awesome. Not to mention entertaining. 

An Epic…Performance

Somehow this fabulous maid of honor has managed to get by breaking the divorce rule (kind of, in a way) like a BOSS. She’s hilarious and fun, and someone better recognize that daring karaoke remix for the glorious thing it is. 

Parting Advice

You’re gonna have a blast writing your maid of honor speech, particularly if you had a bachelorette party for her where everyone reminisced over your years together. 

When your best friend gets married, you inherit with her all the good times (and sometimes bad) she’ll experience in married life. Let her know you can’t wait to be there for the next part of her life’s journey. 

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How To Write The Perfect Maid Of Honor Speech

Cheat sheet included

S o the time has come, and you’re getting ready to write your maid of honor speech! We get it. You’ve been mentally writing your toast since the day you and your BFF met in second grade, or since you became roommates in college, or since she was the only person at your new job who welcomed you. Or you have more to say than you can possibly boil down into one maid of honor speech because this is your sister . She’s been with you through thick and thin.

When the time comes to write something that feels so darn special, it’s easy to find yourself with more questions than answers. Just how many inside jokes can you include? (Not that many.) How long should your toast be? (Not that long.) What should the maid of honor speech say? (We’ve got a formula for you.) How should you end the maid of honor toast? (Go out strong.) We get how overwhelming it can be, and we are here to turn all of that love into the perfect three-minute speech, that will bring down the house.

How do you write a wedding speech? Let’s break it down: In its simplest form, the maid of honor speech is one to four minutes wherein you will wax poetic about how much you love this person, how you can’t believe that she and her partner found each other because they are so perfect together, and how you can’t wait to see what kind of life they will build together. You’ll throw in a few anecdotes (tales from summer camp or college, erring on the side of caution and eschewing details that no one except the two of you needs to know). You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll toast the couple, and it will be brilliant. But if any part of you is worried about how that might come together, We’ve got some very specific tips on how to write the perfect maid of honor toast:

Related Post

How to write a maid of honor speech.

• Start early . Don’t leave writing your Maid of Honor toast for the night before, or even that week. You’ll be busy supporting your friend and I promise it’ll feel less stressful if you get ahead of it.
• Brainstorm . Before you start writing, maybe even weeks before, do some brainstorming. Have a note started on your phone from the moment you know you’ll have a speech to write, spend an evening going through old photos, do whatever it takes to help yourself remember some old stories and anecdotes that will help you make your speech that much more personal.
• Write drunk, edit sober . Or, write fast, edit slow. Just know that your first draft isn’t the end-all. You’ll undoubtedly have a hard time deciding which story to tell, maybe you’ll include a few too many jokes or loving jabs… either way, give yourself the time and space to really edit. And ask a friend for feedback, too.
• Cut it down . Take Raymond Carver’s advice: “Get in, get out. Don’t linger. Go on.” It can sometimes be so much easier to write or say a lot of words, but narrowing it down to the core feelings and message are what will make it powerful.
• Practice, practice, practice . Please don’t let the day of the wedding be the first time you read your toast out loud. Thank me later.

Download our “how to write a maid of honor speech” workbook:

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Happy speech writing friend! You’ve got this!

Get Our Maid of Honor Speech Workbook, Now!

How long should the maid of honor speech be?

You should set a goal of two to three minutes for your Maid of Honor toast. Can it be a bit longer? Sure. But avoid surpassing five minutes. Katelyn Peterson, a wedding speech and vow writer from Wedding Words, gives the following advice, “Written, your speech should be 300 – 700 words. This comes out to roughly 2 – 5 minutes. Any longer and you’ll lose impact while guests lose interest. Plus, there’s nothing that needs to be said in 10 minutes that you can’t say in 5 minutes. Brevity is key to making a positive impact through your speech.”

What should the maid of honor speech say?

Katelyn Peterson has this great thought on what you should include in your toast: “Great speeches include great storytelling. What does every story have? A relatable character, a compelling event, and an internal shift.”

Her example: Tell the story about that time the bride (relatable character) helped you break into your own apartment after you locked yourself out (compelling event) and you ended up laughing so hard, you weren’t upset anymore because she made a challenging moment fun (internal shift). This story also SHOWS something about the bride (which every story should accomplish in a MOH speech). She has the ability to take stressful situations and make them fun. This is your theme. Now come up with two more short stories that SHOW this theme in action using these same storytelling elements.

How should you end the maid of honor speech?

While it’s a speech, it is also meant to be a toast. So, consider ending your time at the mic with a clear closing remark, and asking folks to raise their glasses and toast to the couple. Katelyn also suggests that you “close with a callback. Callbacks are instant crowd-pleasers.” So if you can circle back to one of your stories or anecdotes in your closing toast, you will really win at this whole maid of honor thing.

Photo by Leah and Mark & Co.

Tips For Writing Your Toast

• Get personal. Obviously, this is not the time to use every awful person your friend has dated as evidence for how excellent her chosen life-mate is, but it  is  the time to share a few personal stories. You’ll want to talk about how happy you are for the couple, how much as you knew your BFF was your BFF the second she traded shoelaces with you, you knew that her chosen partner was perfection when they showed up to her house wearing bacon-themed socks. After that, wrap it up nicely and sweetly, toast the couple, and have a seat.
• Don’t worry about the Best Man. Best men have a rep for sometimes being uncool during their speeches ( let’s avoid that ). And if you’re worried, just ignore whatever the best man might get up to, and do you. You don’t have to bring out the waterworks as a counterpoint to a counterpoint to potentially awkward jokes if that’s not your style. If you want to be funny, be funny! Steal the best man’s thunder. It’s fine.
• Don’t turn it into stand-up.   That said, your toast is not the time to try out your future career as a stand-up comedian (unless you literally are a stand-up comedian, in which case, you’ve got this). No one is expecting Maya Angelou to suddenly appear and speak through you, but they probably are expecting something heartfelt and sincere. So really consider the speech and take it seriously, even if humor is your vehicle of delivery.
• Consider your audience . If you were writing this maid of honor toast for the bachelorette party, I’d say, ‘go wild.’ You’re not though. There will be your friend’s new in-laws, grandparents, and siblings around… so keep it appropriate and, ideally, not at all embarrassing. (Hot tip: Avoid talking about exes.)
• Don’t wait too long to start writing.  Try to start writing your speech the month before the wedding so that you can practice on a friend (not the one who is getting married) or partner, and adjust as needed.

Photo by Vivian Chen

A Made of Honor Speech Template

• Part 1: Introduction, Congratulations, & “I love you both so much.”
• Part 2: A lovely anecdote about the couple’s relationship and how awesome they are. (Try to stay away from something about just one of them, but about them as a couple. Talking about primarily one person within the context of their relationship and their love can be lovely, too, if that’s your relationship to the couple.) This should be the bulk of your speech.
• Part 3: I hope you are always as happy, joyous, and in love as that moment. OR This proves how madly in love you two are. May you continue to be an inspiration to us all. Etc.
• Part 4:  (Actually make the toast.) Everyone drinks!

Photo by Betty Clicker

maid of honor speech EXAMPLEs

Here’s a sample maid of honor toast that follows the formula perfectly:

Haley and Rachel, I love you both so much . Haley, not only for you being one of my best friends, but for being there for me when being my friend didn’t just involve late night Wal-Mart runs and hours of watching ’80s movies. We’ve grown up together and I am so very grateful that we did not grow apart. And Rachel, I love you, too, for not only being such an incredible partner for my Haley, but for being a great friend to me also. I know you didn’t expect that dating Haley would include helping her flaky friend after she locked her keys in the car three times in one month, but you are a doll for doing so with a smile and only laughing at me a little. However, what I love most about the two of you is how you are together. I’ve never seen two people that fit so well in each other’s lives; it’s hard to imagine a time when you weren’t “Haley and Rachel.” It may seem to some like you two were just meant to be and that fate put you together, but I think to look at it that way diminishes how amazing your relationship really is. Having been there from the beginning, I know that what appeared to be seamless was the effort of two people who truly loved one another and were determined to make their relationship work. They didn’t just magically fit into each other’s lives; they rearranged their lives to make room. They changed priorities, made time for one another and learned to love each other’s little quirks… like Rachel’s not-so-secret love of R&B vocalists. But nothing shows this as much as Haley, Rachel, and the hockey debacle. You see, when they started dating, Rachel noticed that Haley had a framed Gretsky jersey in her living room. And, deciding to play it cool, Rachel started asking Haley if she wanted to go to local hockey games and watching the latest game on TV just so she’d have something to talk about to Haley the next time they chatted. Haley, oblivious to all of this, thought Rachel really liked hockey so she enlisted my brother to teach her more about the game. Because, you see, Haley never watched hockey. The jersey belonged to her Uncle Mike, and Aunt Laura gave it to her as a reminder of him after he passed away. Meanwhile, both my brother and Rachel are pretending to know more about hockey than they actually do and were starring in their own sports-themed comedy of errors. Eventually, they figured it out… and by eventually I mean seven months later. However, once these two worked on their communication skills, they had a new favorite hobby to do together… and further proof that Uncle Mike really is watching over Haley. AND, he’s bound and determined that she marry a hockey lover! And it only goes to show not only how goofy these two are for each other, but how much they truly are committed to being in each other’s lives. Your love makes us smile, makes us tear up with joy and makes us believe in the kind of love cynics would make you feel is impossible. Thank you for being an inspiration and my friends. To Haley and Rachel!  (everybody drinks)

Here’s another great example. There’s a reason this YouTube video has over a million views. The speaker in this video follows a pretty simple maid of honor toast template, one that might help you.

• “Good evening, everyone.”
• Short joke or anecdote from the day.
• A bit about how you know the couple. (Katelyn from Wedding Words suggests that you “don’t add fluff to your intro. “For those of you who don’t know me…” is an unnecessary line. Instead, jump right in by simply stating your name, role, and relationship to the couple.”
• Storytime. This might be one long story or a few short stories. Tell about the couple’s love story, about when you met the partner or when you knew this was going to be your friend or sister’s spouse. Throw in a few small laughs.
• Offer advice or well-wishes for the couple’s future.
• “I love you.”

One more heartfelt example. Her outline is similar, do we see a pattern?

• Hello / introduction (if you’re going to make it funny, make yourself the ‘butt of the joke.’)
• Storytime. The maid of honor stretched her story out to create the entire speech while peppering in mini-stories about different times she and her family spent time with the groom. She got some good laughs without any embarrassment to the couple.
• She didn’t feel like she had advice to give, so she offered “Three things I know,” where she highlighted different wonderful things about the couple’s love.
• She did a call back to the beginning of her story.

Have you ever written or heard a truly great maid of honor toast? What works—and what doesn’t?

Founder & Editor-In-Chief

Meg is the Founder of APW, and has been the sites EIC for the past twelve years. She has written two best selling wedding books:   A Practical Wedding   and  A Practical Wedding Planner .  Meg’s work has been referenced in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, NPR, Jezebel, and Refinery29 . She’s also written hugely viral wedding articles for Buzzfeed. She lives in Oakland, CA with her husband and two children. For more than you ever wanted to know about Meg, you can visit MegKeene.com .

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• Maid of honor speech for a sister

How to easily write a great Maid of Honor speech for your sister

Step-by-step help, a maid of honor speech outline template to use, with a FREE printable and a heartfelt speech example

By:  Susan Dugdale  | Last modified: 09-28-2023

Understandably many women feel a little bit nervous about writing a maid of honor speech for their sister!

After all, this can be a daunting task. You love your sister. And she's honored you, by choosing you for this special role.

The last thing you want is to embarrass her, or her wedding guests, on her big day. But what do you say?

What are the right words to reflect your relationship with your sister? How do you sincerely share the happiness you feel for her and her new husband-to-be?

And where, on earth, do you begin?

The answer is here. The good news is that it's straight forward, and simple. Not hard work at all.

What's on this page

How to start your sister's maid of honor speech

How to brainstorm : the process from generating ideas to selecting the best ones to use, step by step.

The five parts of the speech template with explanatory notes and example text:

• 1. The introduction

2. History with the bride

3. life before the groom, 4. the romance.

• 5. The conclusion

A FREE printable maid of honor speech outline to help you effectively organize and order what you want to say

More MOH resources : 2 more maid of honor speeches, poems and readings...

How to start your maid of honor speech

Grab a piece of paper, a pen, and start with a brainstorming session to collect up the stories and ideas you think you might like to share.

Then follow each of the five steps in the maid of honor speech outline that form the speech template below.

You'll come out the other end of the process with a short, simple and sincere speech: one that really does honor your sister on her wedding day. Read the example speech and see for yourself!

Return to Top

Do a brainstorm to collect your thoughts

The best way to begin writing the perfect maid of honor speech for your sister is to collect your thoughts together. And the best way to do that is to brainstorm.

The brainstorming process

The brainstorming process is very simple. Jot down ideas about what you think you want to touch on in your speech, just as I've done in the image above. 

Allow yourself complete freedom to explore as many potential topics as you can and, as much time as you need.

Recall fond memories. Remember shared experiences: the good times, the hard times and the funny times. Think about her best qualities: the ones you admire her for.

Do not edit or censor your words

Do not edit yourself! Put down whatever comes into your mind. Don't stop to worry about whether it's good, bad or appropriate. You'll review it later, and definitely don't stop to check your spelling!

You do not need to write full sentences or paragraphs: just notes. You want enough words to trigger your memory about what you thought would be a good idea to say and that's all.

If you run out of paper, get another piece. Keep going until you can genuinely think of nothing more.

Picking the best material from your brainstorm notes

Next you will pick the best of these ideas and organize them into the 5 sections of the template below. This will give your speech a logical structure: a clear beginning, middle and end.

Obviously, the tone: whether the speech is laugh-out-loud funny, wryly amusing, sentimental or heartfelt and sincere, is something you'll decide for yourself. That's governed by the stories and ideas you choose to share and the language you use to express them.

Read a maid of honor speech example for a sister

This example maid of honor speech is based on the notes from the brainstorm image above.

The text of the speech is split into five parts: one for each of the required sections. As you scroll down the page you'll see it in the green call-out box under each section's explanatory notes.

1. The introduction to your maid of honor sister speech

In the introduction it's customary to identify yourself because there may be guests who don't know you and don't know you are the bride's sister.

Next you welcome the guests to your sister's wedding reception, thank the happy couple for letting everyone share in their day, and then you thank your sister for the privilege of being her maid of honor.

(I've added a story too: to make it more interesting and bring a smile!☺)

1. Introduction

What a day, Mary!

Remember when we were kids, how we dressed up in Mom’s old party dresses? And how we used to put a white tablecloth on our heads and march around, singing, “Here comes the bride, fair fat and wide.”?

Good evening. My name is Jennifer, and this beautiful woman, this stunning bride: the antithesis of “fair fat and wide”, is my beloved little sister.

As little girls, we laughed ourselves silly over that game. Now here we are twenty-five years later.

Not laughing. Mary’s not wearing a tablecloth. And this time it’s for real.

It's a great honor to be asked to speak. Thank you.

Thank you too, to all of you, for coming to share this special day with us. Especially Frank’s family.

We know Mary adores you, almost as much as she does us. It’s wonderful seeing our families all together to celebrate this marriage.

Next, you could share a short story: something humorous, or anecdotal, about the bride from your childhood memories. This will give the audience a picture of your relationship with her, and also set the tone for the rest of the speech.

Whether you choose to write something funny, serious or sentimental, the most important thing to remember is to be genuine.

2. History with the bride 

The pair of us, share thirty years worth of loyalty and love: with an occasional sisterly quarrel thrown in. The usual sort of thing. Her snitching my favorite pair of jeans, without asking, and looking better in them, when we were 17 and 15 years old. A bit of phone snooping...Nothing major. Certainly nothing a bossy big sister couldn’t handle.

Before I left home, we shared a bedroom for a long time. That means you go through cycles of liking, loving and loathing each other. Sometimes all at once.

The jeans was definitely loathing.

The way she took my side over not eating Brussels sprouts was sisterly solidarity. Mary and me united against parental cruelty! I liked that.

But what was truly excellent, was our bed time stories: the ones we told each other. As soon as Mom turned off the light and closed the door, we’d pick up from where we left off the night before.

A favorite was the classic tale of a prince (handsome) arriving in the nick of time to rescue the beautiful damsel in distress, from some dastardly fellow, or a particularly nasty situation.

(We rejected stories about girls having a fabulous time up to their elbows in grease rebuilding a vintage car in the garage. We wanted lace, lots of it and happily ever after, down the aisle.)

In our stable of handsome princes, the handsomest prince of them all, the one we both swooned over was Darren. Darren was a super-super man created for us, by us. He was brave, brilliant, strong, just like Dad, and let us do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. (Not like Dad.)

Did he ever go out to work? Nah. Did he ever tell us we had to rescue ourselves? No chance.

Darren was always there. Always ready. Always had time and always, always knew what to do. Darren was masculine perfection.

I can’t remember the exact moment when this fine fellow left.

But I do know Frank had quite an act to follow.

This next section focuses on your sister's life and what she was doing before she met her new spouse.

For example, maybe she was busy focused on her career and never really gave enough time to finding a best friend and life-partner.

Or perhaps your sister was having a good time travelling the world when she found her match.

Or did she fall for her good friend, the person next door whom she's known since she was eight?

Stories to avoid

There are a couple of things to watch out for.

The first is to be mindful about sharing anything that could be embarrassing for either your sister, her new husband, or your family members and friends. (Past relationships are generally off limits.)

In addition, please don't fall into the trap of sharing a tale or something about your sister that no one can relate to except for you and her. If you do that you'll find yourself looking at puzzled faces.

When my sister dreams, she dreams big, and then she makes it her business to have them come true.

High school was followed by college which was followed by the career she’s always wanted: to be an editor and read for a living. The pinnacle of bliss for a 'booky' girl! A job enabling her to bask in the afterglow of a successfully relocated sentence terminal: aka a period or full stop.

I’m proud of what she's achieved, how she balances her life, somehow making time for everything.  She's graceful, organized and appears, unrushed. (A trick I need to learn!) 

Mary’s a good person, a great friend and, my role model.

Then along came Frank. Was it true love at first sight?

Next, transition to a paragraph about your sister and her husband. How did they meet? How has the groom changed your sister’s life?

You can talk about how inspiring their relationship is to you or share a humorous story involving your sister and new brother-in-law.

This part doesn’t have to be very long.  It's necessary because it brings your speech into the present. A good way to conclude this portion is by formally welcoming the groom into your family.

Did she swoon? Was she in a ghastly situation: a set of parentheses too many? And nowhere obvious to put them? You’ll have to ask her yourself.

What I’ve learned about Frank over the last six years...

(Yes, six years! And you all thought it was tough waiting for her to get to the church. 10 minutes. Diddly-squat, compared to what she put him through!)

What I’ve learned leaves us in no doubt he’s earned her hand in his.

This man loves books just as much as she does. Hard to believe, but it’s true. Both of them live by the wisdom: when in doubt go to the library. You’ll find the answer to everything there.

Some people do bar crawls. These guys do libraries. And book stores, and book rescues: tatty, out of print treasures from street stalls.

He’s kind. He’s thoughtful. He loves walking in the country side, chocolate, and his dog, a golden lab called Fido.

We think Fido was the clincher, with dark chocolate close behind. Plus, books, his ability to listen, to laugh...

In short, he knows how to be there for her, day after day, night after night, page after page, chapter after chapter.

5. Conclusion

There are many possibilities for a conclusion. You could end with a quote, a joke, some spiritual advice, a toast or simply say, congratulations.

Do try to keep with the tone you’ve set in the rest of the speech and end with what feels most appropriate for your sister.

Darren? Pooh! He’s been well and truly replaced by the real and best thing. We couldn’t possibly imagine a better partner for her. They're a perfect match.

Ladies and gentleman please join me in congratulating Mary and her handsome prince Frank. May they continue to share their love story for many, many happy years.

Get a printable Maid of Honor speech outline

This printable maid of honor speech outline template * pdf will help you organize and order the stories and ideas you generate for your speech when you do the ** brainstorming exercise.

Follow the step-by-step instructions on page 1 of the template, select what you want to use from your brainstorm notes, and enter them in the right places.  

Once the outline is complete, you'll be ready to turn it into a speech.

To get the printable either click on the image below or this link: maid of honor speech outline .

( * The pdf will open in a new window.) ( ** For best results do the brainstorming exercise before trying to complete the template. )

More MOH speech resources to help

I have other pages which you may find useful. For instance:

• another two maid of honor speech examples

•  how to end a Maid of Honor speech : 20 examples of conclusions of varying types. Some are funny. Some use quotations...
• a huge collection of wedding poems and readings . You might find just what you want there.
• notes on writing a bridesmaid speech
• detailed notes on general speech preparation (very good if you've never prepared a speech before)
• advice on how to practice your speech because getting the words written is only part of the task. Delivering them completes it. Doing that the very best you can will make your maid of honor speech extra special for everybody.

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The Ultimate Guide to Crafting a Memorable Maid of Honor Speech

In this guide, we share tips and templates for writing a great maid of honor speech.

Writing the perfect maid of honor speech can be a daunting task, but with a little preparation and creativity, you can deliver a heartfelt and memorable speech that will leave the audience laughing and crying. Here are some tips on how to write the perfect maid of honor speech.

• Start by brainstorming your ideas. Think about your relationship with the bride, your favorite memories together, and any funny or touching anecdotes that you can share. Make a list of all your ideas and then choose the ones that you think will be most meaningful to the audience.
• Next, organize your thoughts. Decide on the main theme or message that you want to convey and then organize your ideas around that theme. This will help to keep your speech focused and make it easier for the audience to follow.
• Use personal anecdotes to add humor and warmth to your speech. Share a funny story about the bride or a touching memory that you have shared together. These anecdotes will make your speech more relatable and enjoyable for the audience.
• Speak from the heart. The most important thing is to speak from the heart and be genuine in your words. Avoid using cliche or overly rehearsed words and phrases, and instead speak in a way that feels natural and authentic to you.
• Practice your speech ahead of time. Rehearsing your speech will help you to feel more confident and comfortable when delivering it. Practice in front of a mirror or with a friend, and make any necessary adjustments to your speech.
• Keep it short and sweet. While you want to make sure to cover all the important points, try not to make your speech too long. Remember that the audience has been listening to speeches all night, and they will appreciate a shorter, more succinct speech.
• End on a high note. Finish your speech with a heartfelt and meaningful message, perhaps a quote or a wish for the happy couple.

By following these tips, you can write a maid of honor speech that is engaging, heartfelt, and memorable. Remember to speak from the heart, use personal anecdotes, and practice ahead of time. With a little preparation, you can deliver a speech that the bride, groom, and all the guests will never forget.

Here are 10 templates to give you ideas and inspiration for your maid of honor speech:

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #1

Good evening everyone,

I am honored to be standing here today as [Bride]'s maid of honor. [Bride], you look absolutely radiant, and I know that you are truly happy on this special day.

I have known [Bride] for many years now, and I have been privileged to witness her transformation from a shy, young girl to the confident, strong woman that she is today. She is an inspiration to me and to so many others, and I am honored to call her my friend.

[Bride], when you first told me that you were in love with [Groom], I could see the spark in your eyes, the way your face lit up when you spoke about him. It was clear to me then that you had found your soulmate, and I knew that you would be happy together.

[Groom], you are a truly lucky man. [Bride] is not only beautiful, but she is also kind, smart and funny. She is a woman of integrity and grace, and she will be a devoted and loving wife.

As we raise our glasses to the happy couple, let us also remember that love is not just about the joys of today, but also the challenges of tomorrow. Love is about being there for each other, through the good times and the bad, and about building a strong foundation of trust and mutual respect.

So, to [Groom] and [Bride], I wish you a lifetime of love and happiness. May your love continue to grow stronger with each passing day, and may your happiness be as boundless as the love that you share.

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #2

First of all, let me just say, WOW! This wedding is absolutely stunning, and I am so happy to be here to celebrate the love and commitment of [Groom] and [Bride].

As the Maid of Honor, it is an honor and a privilege to stand here and speak on behalf of [Bride], my sister, best friend and confidant. [Bride], you look absolutely breathtaking, and I am so happy for you and [Groom] as you begin this new chapter in your lives together.

I have known [Groom] for a while now, and I have seen how he makes [Bride] the happiest woman in the world. He brings out the best in her, and I know that they will have a lifetime of love, laughter and happiness together.

[Groom] and [Bride], I want to remind you that marriage isn't always easy, but it is always worth it. It's about making a promise to love, support, and stand by one another, through the good times and the bad. And I know that you two will do just that.

So, let's raise a glass to the happy couple. May your love continue to grow stronger with each passing day, and may your happiness be as boundless as the love that you share.

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #3

Good evening everyone, I'm honored to be standing here today as the maid of honor for [bride's name]. Now, I know some of you may be thinking, 'Oh great, another boring wedding speech.' But fear not, because I'm not just any maid of honor, I'm [bride's name] maid of honor, and that means I have some stories to tell.

First of all, I have to say that [bride's name] is not only my best friend, but also the most beautiful bride I've ever seen. And I've seen a lot of brides, trust me.

I've known [bride's name] for [number] years now, and in that time, I've learned a lot about her. For example, I've learned that she's a terrible dancer, but she makes up for it with her enthusiasm. I've also learned that she can eat an entire pizza by herself, but she'll still fit into her wedding dress.

But most importantly, I've learned that [bride's name] is one of the kindest, most caring people I've ever met. She's always there for her friends and family, and she's never too busy to lend a helping hand or a listening ear.

[Groom's name], you're a lucky man. You have found not only a beautiful wife, but also a true partner and a best friend.

So, let's raise a glass to the happy couple. May your love continue to grow stronger with each passing year. And [bride's name], if you ever need a dance partner or a pizza buddy, you know where to find me. Cheers!

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #4

Dear friends and family,

As the maid of honor, I am honored to stand here today and speak on behalf of the bride. She and I have been friends for many years and I am incredibly happy to see her so in love and so happy.

The groom is truly a lucky man to have found such a wonderful person in the bride. She is kind, caring, and always puts others before herself. She has a heart of gold and I am so grateful to call her my friend.

The love that the bride and groom share is truly a once in a lifetime kind of love. They bring out the best in each other and together they are truly unstoppable. I am so excited to see what the future holds for them and I know that they will have a lifetime of happiness ahead of them.

So, to the bride and groom, I want to say congratulations on finding each other and for choosing to spend the rest of your lives together. I wish you all the happiness in the world and I am honored to have been a part of your special day. Cheers to the happy couple!

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #5

Dear family and friends,

As the maid of honor, I am honored to stand here today and celebrate the love of [bride/groom] and [bride/groom]. I have known [bride/groom] for [insert number of years] years and have been blessed to have [her/him] in my life.

[Insert personal anecdote about how you met the bride/groom and your friendship].

When [bride/groom] told me [she/he] was getting married, I couldn't have been happier for [her/him]. And when [she/he] asked me to be [her/his] maid of honor, I was truly touched and humbled.

[Insert personal anecdote about the bride/groom and their partner].

[Bride/groom] and [partner], you are truly a match made in heaven. Your love for each other is evident in the way you look at each other, the way you laugh together, and the way you support each other. You are a true inspiration to me and to everyone here.

[Insert personal anecdote about the bride/groom and their partner's relationship]

On behalf of [bride/groom], [partner], and myself, thank you for joining us on this special day. We are so grateful to have each and every one of you here to share in our joy. Cheers to the happy couple!

May your love for each other continue to grow and flourish, and may you have a lifetime of happiness together.

To the bride and groom, cheers to you both.

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #6

Good evening everyone! I am honored to stand here as the maid of honor on this special day. (Name of bride) and (Name of groom) have chosen me to stand by their side and I couldn't be happier for them.

As the maid of honor, it is my duty to share some embarrassing stories about the bride. But, let's be honest, (Name of bride) is far too perfect to have any embarrassing moments worth sharing. So, instead, I will share with you some funny moments we've had together.

Like the time we went on a trip to [insert personal anecdotes] and ended up getting lost in the middle of nowhere and had to ask for directions from a cow. Or when we were trying to bake a cake together and ended up setting off the smoke alarm.

But in all seriousness, (Name of bride) and (Name of groom) are truly meant to be. They bring out the best in each other and I am so happy to see them starting this new chapter in their lives together.

I would like to raise a glass and toast to the happy couple. May your love continue to grow stronger with each passing day.

So, let's raise our glasses and join me in wishing (Name of bride) and (Name of groom) a lifetime of happiness and love. Cheers!

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #7

Dear [guests],

I am honored to stand here today as [bride/groom]'s [maid of honor/best man]. [Name of bride/groom] and I have known each other for [insert time frame], and in that time, I have been lucky enough to witness the love and devotion that [bride/groom] and [partner's name] share.

[Insert personal story or anecdote about the couple that highlights their love and connection].

[Partner's name], you have brought out the best in [bride/groom], and I know that you will continue to do so for the rest of your lives together.

[Insert personal story or anecdote about the couple that highlights their growth and development as a couple].

[Name of bride/groom], you are not only my [sister/brother/friend], you are also my role model. I have always looked up to you and been inspired by your strength, your kindness, and your ability to love unconditionally.

[Insert personal story or anecdote about the couple's relationship with their family and friends].

As [bride/groom] and [partner's name] begin this new chapter of their lives together, I am honored to stand by their side and witness their love and commitment to one another.

[Insert toast or well wishes for the couple].

Cheers to the happy couple!

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #8

Ladies and gentlemen, [bride's name] has begged me to speak on her behalf tonight, so here goes nothing.

First off, [bride's name] has always been [insert personal story about bride]. But let's not forget about [groom's name], who [insert personal story about groom].

[Groom's name] and [bride's name] have been together for [length of time] and in that time, they've been through [insert personal story about the couple].

But honestly, the real reason I'm here is to talk about [bride's name]'s [insert personal story about bride's personality trait].

Let's raise a glass to the happy couple and to [bride's name]'s [insert personal story about bride's personality trait] that will no doubt keep [groom's name] on his toes for years to come.

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #9

Good evening everyone! I am honored to be here tonight to give a speech as the maid of honor for [bride's name]. Before I begin, I just want to say that [bride's name] is truly lucky to have such an amazing group of friends and family here to celebrate with her on her special day.

Now, let's get down to business. I have known [bride's name] for [insert time period] and in that time, I have learned a thing or two about her. For example, I know that [insert personal story about bride].

And let's not forget about the groom, [groom's name]. I have to say, I was a little skeptical at first when [bride's name] first started dating him. But after getting to know him, I can confidently say that he is [insert personal story about groom].

Of course, no wedding would be complete without a few cringe-worthy memories. Like the time [bride's name] and I [insert embarrassing story about bride]. Or the time [groom's name] and I [insert embarrassing story about groom].

But in all seriousness, I am so happy for [bride's name] and [groom's name]. They truly are meant for each other and I know they will have a lifetime of happiness together.

So let's raise a glass to the happy couple. Cheers to [bride's name] and [groom's name]!

May you laugh together, love together, and dance together forever.

Maid of Honor Speech Idea #10

Dear guests,

First and foremost, I would like to extend my heartfelt congratulations to the newlyweds [bride/groom] and [bride/groom]. It is an honor to stand here today as [bride/groom]'s Maid of Honor and to have the opportunity to share some words about the beautiful couple.

[Insert personal anecdote about how you met the bride/groom]. From the moment I met [bride/groom], I knew that [she/he] was someone special. [Insert another personal anecdote about a memorable experience you shared with the bride/groom].

[Bride/groom], you are truly a remarkable person, with a heart full of love, kindness, and generosity. And [bride/groom], you are [her/his] perfect match in every way. Your love for each other is truly inspiring and it is evident in the way you look at each other.

[Insert a personal anecdote about the bride and groom's relationship]. I have watched your relationship grow and flourish, and I am in awe of the love and commitment you have for each other. Your love is not only strong but also genuine and selfless, and I have no doubt that you will have a lifetime of happiness together.

Today, as you start your journey as husband and wife, I want to wish you all the love, joy, and laughter in the world. May your marriage be filled with adventures, love, and laughter, and may you always be there for each other, through thick and thin.

To the newlyweds, congratulations and here's to a lifetime of happiness.

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech: Wording Examples and Ideas

As a maid of honor, you’ll need to juggle several important duties – from organising an epic bridal shower to going wedding dress shopping and holding the bride’s bouquet.

But the most daunting task of all? Writing and delivering a maid of honor speech at the reception!

We totally get how terrifying this can be, which is why we’re here to help. Keep reading for our ultimate guide on writing the perfect maid of honor speech below, including some brainstorming prompts and wording examples to get you started.

How Long Should a Maid of Honor Speech Be?

Let’s get the good news out of the way first: your maid of honor speech doesn’t have to be long! Remember, you probably won’t be the only one speaking at the reception, so you’ll want to keep your speech short and sweet. We’d say the perfect maid of honor speech should ideally be between 2 to 4 minutes, and definitely no longer than 5.

What Should a Maid of Honor Speech Include?

Simply put, a maid of honor speech should be based around two key things: celebrating your relationship with the bride and celebrating her relationship with her new husband or wife. 

Maid of honor speeches usually includes a mix of personal anecdotes, compliments to the happy couple, and well wishes for the future. Your speech can include your favourite memories with the bride, but it should also strike the right balance by including some sentiments towards her partner and their relationship, too. Usually, you’ll start your speech by talking about the bride and wrap it up by talking about her and her partner as a couple.

So, what does this look like in action? If you’re looking for a helpful framework to follow, consider this tried and tested formula for a winning maid of honor speech below:

• Introduce yourself. It might seem obvious, but introducing yourself is important to give your speech context and explain your relationship with the bride. Don’t forget, there may be guests at the wedding who have no idea who you are!
• Talk about the bride. Begin your speech by complimenting the bride. What do you love about her? What makes her such a good person/best friend/sibling? Be specific with your compliments, too – rather than saying, “She’s such a generous friend”, share a specific moment that demonstrates this.
• Include a favourite anecdote. Do you have a favourite memory that sticks out when you reflect on your relationship with the bride? This is a good time to share one or two short anecdotes. They can be funny stories or more sincere and heartfelt moments.
• Compliment their partner. Now it’s time to bring her partner into the speech. What are your favourite qualities about them? What was your first impression of them? Why are they such a good match for the bride?
• Celebrate the couple. This is where you’ll want to highlight the relationship between the happy couple. Talk about what makes their relationship so special, what you admire about them as a couple, and how their lives have changed for the better.
• Share your well wishes. Tie it all together by offering your best piece of marriage advice, favourite quote, or some warm wishes for the future.
• Share a toast. Finally, raise your glass to toast the happy couple (and reward yourself with a sip of champagne, too!).

Things To Avoid In Your Maid of Honor Speech

Now that you know what to include in a maid of honor speech, is there anything you should strictly avoid? When it comes to correct etiquette, keep the following suggestions in mind to ensure your speech is well-received: 

• Sharing funny stories or gently “roasting” the couple is totally fine if that suits your relationship with them, but steer clear of anything inappropriate, rude, or embarrassing. Remember, there will likely be elderly relatives and important family members in the room, so keep it PG-rated.
• If you’re not comfortable using jokes or humour, then don’t! It’s better to keep your speech genuine and heartfelt, rather than trying to be funny. Of course, it’s completely okay to include some comedy, but don’t force it unless it’s true to who you are.
• While you and your BFF probably have a lifetime of inside jokes between you, try to avoid referencing these in your speech. If the majority of wedding guests won’t understand it, it’s probably not worth including.
• Finally, don’t bring up any old boyfriends or ex-partners! It probably goes without saying, but your maid of honor speech is about celebrating the happy couple – not bringing up unwanted memories from the past.

Maid of Honor Speech Writing Prompts

Still feeling stuck? The best place to start crafting your maid of honor speech is usually with a good brainstorming session. Use these questions and writing prompts to help you get the inspiration flowing:

• How did you meet the bride? 
• What was your first impression of her?
• How has your relationship evolved over the years?
• What’s your favourite memory with the bride?
• What’s your funniest story about the bride?
• What are the bride’s best qualities? How does she demonstrate this?
• How would you describe the bride in 3 words?
• How did you meet her partner?
• What was your first impression of her partner?
• What are her partner’s best qualities? How do they demonstrate this?
• How would you describe her partner in 3 words?
• How did you know her partner was “the one”?
• How did her partner propose?
• What do you admire most about the couple?
• What milestones have the couple celebrated?
• How has their relationship evolved over the years?
• Have they overcome any challenges or hardships together?
• What makes their relationship unique?
• What’s your favourite memory with the couple?
• How have they made an impact on your life?
• What are your hopes for their future together as a married couple?

Once you’ve spent some time answering these prompts, you should have plenty of fantastic material to work with. 

Maid of Honor Speech Examples and Ideas

Now, it’s time to start pulling everything together! Use these maid of honor speech templates and examples below to be inspired:

Maid of Honor Speech Example For Sister:

“Hi everyone. I wanted to start by thanking you all for being here today to celebrate this amazing couple. As most of you know, I’m (Bride’s) little sister, (Name). 

I think we can all agree that (Bride) has a personality like no other. She’s outspoken, feisty, and stubborn – but also the most caring, loyal, and funniest person I’ve ever known. Growing up, we were like two peas in a pod. We were always getting into trouble and causing mischief together – and truthfully, not much has changed! I’ll never forget the time we (insert relevant anecdote), or the time we (insert relevant anecdote). It’s memories like these that make me so thankful to have (Bride) as a sister.

I used to wonder if there would ever be a guy brave enough to handle (Bride). Well, my sister has just tied the knot, and I think she’s found her perfect match in (Partner). (Partner), I couldn’t have chosen anyone better for my big sister. You’re kind, patient, and just the right amount of crazy to fit into our family – as demonstrated by the time you (insert relevant anecdote). Most importantly, you love my sister for who she is – stubbornness and all.

Your commitment to each other inspires me every day, and watching your relationship grow over the years has been so special to witness. I wish you both nothing but the best for the future, and I know you’re going to have some unforgettable adventures together. So, with that, I’d like to invite everyone to raise their glasses for a toast. Here’s to the happy couple!”

Maid of Honor Speech Example for Best Friend:

“Hi everyone. For those who haven’t yet had the chance to meet me, I’m (Name). (Bride) and I have been best friends since college, where we quickly bonded over our shared love for (insert hobbies/interests). 10 years later, and I couldn’t be happier to be standing here today to celebrate the amazing person (Bride) is, and the amazing life she and (Partner) have created together.

There are so many traits that I love about (Bride). First, her wacky sense of humour and ability to find the funny moment in any situation – like the time she (insert relevant anecdote). Secondly, her thoughtfulness and generosity, especially when she (insert relevant anecdote). And finally, her ability to light up any room she walks into. (Bride), you look so beautiful tonight.

Now, onto (Partner). My first impression of (Partner) was that he was incredibly kind, friendly, and humble. All of these things are still true, but as I’ve gotten to know him better, I’ve also seen how hilariously goofy he can be. I’ll never forget when he (insert relevant anecdote). It was then I knew that he was “the one” for my best friend.

(Bride) and (Partner), you complement each other perfectly, and it’s easy to see how crazy you are about each other. I’m so honoured to call you my friends, and I can’t wait to see how you navigate this exciting next chapter together. I’ll leave with you a quote to take with you through marriage: (insert relevant quote). Here’s to (Bride) and (Partner)!”

Nailing Your Wedding Speech

Finally, don’t forget that practice makes perfect. Once you’ve crafted your maid of honor speech, spend some time rehearsing it before the day until you’re comfortable with your delivery. The more prepared you are, the more confident you’ll feel when the big moment comes!

And while the thought of writing a maid of honor speech can definitely be daunting, try not to put too much pressure on yourself. Simply speak authentically from the heart, and you can’t go wrong.

Want to be the best maid of honor ever? Read these 13 important maid of honor duties you can’t forget to do !

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How To Write A Killer Maid Of Honor Speech

Don't forget to make a toast.

Everyone knows how big the wedding industry is and just how much goes into wedding planning. Whether the couple has hired a professional wedding planner or simply put their bridal party to work, there's tons to do before the big day.

Aside from the wedding ceremony and reception details, there are also the best man and maid of honor duties to consider. For example, they're responsible for ensuring things go smoothly on the wedding day, planning the bachelor and bachelorette party, or helping the bride and groom with anything they might need. Among their duties are also the best man and maid of honor speeches.

Wedding speeches can cause a lot of anxiety for those making the wedding toast, and it's completely understandable. Finding the right words to say about your close friend or family member on her wedding day can be a challenge. When writing your maid of honor speech, word it in a way that tells the couple's love story but also highlights the best things about the bride and how they've been improved since being with her new husband.

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Even if you know the bride well and have tons of inside jokes together, crafting a speech that entertains guests while casting her in the best light can be hard to balance. Whether it's your first or fifth time writing maid of honor toasts, there are a few tips and formats to keep in mind to ensure your speech is well received, memorable and makes the bride and groom feel special on their big day.

All you want is to be the best maid of honor to the bride, and we want to help you get there. Here's how to write a killer maid of honor speech that both the bride and groom, as well as all the guests at the wedding reception will remember. 

How To Write A Maid Of Honor Speech

Writing a maid of honor speech is a very personal process -- which is one of the reasons why it's so difficult. Every bride has their own idea of what they would want to be included in a speech, what things are off-limits and what would be important for the bride and her guests to hear from a maid of honor speech.

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This also makes it difficult to put together a hard and fast guideline of rules to follow when writing a maid of honor speech. Though every pride is different, there are some ground rules and templates that can be used as a starting point to use as a guide. 

Maid Of Honor Speech Outline 

In an ideal scenario, a well-executed maid of honor speech generally follows the below outline.

Step One: Say a few things about the bride

Sometimes the hardest part of writing a maid of honor speech is knowing where to start. It can be helpful to envision yourself standing up in front of the room and asking yourself, what would they want to know? 

A good starting point would be to introduce yourself and say how you know the bride. You may include an anecdote about how you met, but make sure you keep mentions of yourself light and keep the focus on the bride. For example, what was it that drew you to want to meet her initially? What are some of the positive qualities about her you recognized off the bat? Over time? 

Step Two: Say how happy you are for the bride and groom

Now that everyone knows who you are and how you know the bride, express how happy you are to be part of her special day, and how excited you are to see the new couple begin their lives together.

Step Three: Tell one personal story about you and the bride

This can be the hardest part about writing a maid of honor speech. You likely have so many fun stories you'd love to share, but for the sake of time stick to one. Try to have this story be something that everyone can relate to – maybe it's the time that she came up with an inventive solution to a problem you were met with while on a trip because she's so resourceful, or the time her spontaneity caused you to make friends with strangers.

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This can be a heartfelt story as well, of a time where she did something meaningful for you. Try to keep these stories light and fun and cast the bride in the best light.

Step Four: Say a few more positive things about the bride

After you've shared a personal story, build on the other positive attributes of the bride. Is she dependable? Fun? Hilarious? Giving? Think about the ways she's impacted your life for the better. Chances are the wedding guests who have showed up for her on her big day have been touched by her in that way, too, which will make your speech relatable. 

Step Five: Talk about why the bride and groom are great together

Hopefully, you've had the chance to get to know the bride's significant other well. But in the event that you haven't spent as much time with her new spouse as you might have liked for the sake of writing this speech, focus on how you've noticed how much happier she is since they've been together. 

RELATED: 22 Beautiful Wedding Quotes to Celebrate Love and Partnership

Step six: thank the bride and the family.

Planning a wedding is rarely ever a solo person effort. It's likely that in addition to the work and funds the bride and groom put forward to make this day happen, the families of the new couple likely contributed as well. While you don't need to necessarily call this out, thanking the bride and groom for making you part of their day, and their families for making this incredible event happen is always a good move. 

Step Seven: Make a wedding toast

Wondering how to end a maid of honor speech? With a toast! Wish the couple well and ask the room to join you in raising a glass to toast to the new couple. This might be the easiest (and most fun) part of the maid of honor speech, so don't skip it!

Maid Of Honor Speech Tips

Try freewriting. If you're having trouble starting your maid of honor speech, it could be because you feel the immense pressure to say the exact right thing. Freewriting, or writing your thoughts as you go, helps take the pressure off and allows you to get all of your feelings and thoughts about the bride down on paper. Set a timer and allow yourself to write for 20 minutes.

Think about all the positives about the bride, the memories you've shared, and any stories that you love to talk about her. At the end of your 20 minutes, you'll likely have plenty of material to pick and choose from for your maid of honor speech.

RELATED:  New Study Says Couples Who Use Pronouns ‘We’ and ‘Us’ Are Happier in Love

Keep it brief. How long should a maid of honor speech be? Keep your maid of honor speech under five minutes. Any longer than this, and people start to lose interest. Not to mention, there are other speeches that need to be made along with finding time for all the other wedding traditions. Before the wedding, it's a good idea to time your speech to ensure it's not too long.

Pause for responses. If you're someone who gets nervous speaking in front of people, it can be tempting to power through the entire speech without stopping to allow people to react. Make sure you give people space to react. Even if your speech isn't funny, you may be surprised at the "awws" or even applause that people feel compelled to give -- especially if they've had a few drinks at this point. Keep your speech well-paced and remember to incorporate breathing room. 

Maid Of Honor Speech Dos And Don’ts

Don't mention past relationships. This one might seem like a given, but it's an important one to avoid. Even if you did witness the bride kiss a lot of frogs before finding her prince, now is not the time to bring that up. Instead of focusing on past dating mishaps, including what was different about the person she's marrying and the positive attributes that drew her to him.

Do practice ahead of time. Even if you're a pro at public speaking, practicing your maid of honor speech to ensure you're familiar with it, that it's well-timed and doesn't run too long is a smart idea ahead of the big day. 

RELATED:  75 Relationship Quotes To Cherish The One You Love

Don't be generic . As much as possible, try to steer clear of generic phrases when talking about the bride and make the speech authentic to your friendship. Weddings are formal events, but if your friendship with the bride is funny and goofy, don't be afraid to interject that into your speech.

Do stay sober before the big speech. This can be difficult, especially during a long ceremony day. Only you know your relationship with alcohol and how it impacts you, so be mindful of how much you're drinking before you get up in front of a room full of wedding guests to give a speech. 

Maid Of Honor Speech Examples

Still having trouble writing your maid of honor speech? Here are a few maid of honor toast examples to help get the creative juices flowing. 

Speech for a Best Friend

Hi everyone. My name is [name], and I've known [Bride] since [childhood/high school/college] when she and I [insert story of how you met/bonded]. Having known her for [X] years, it makes me so happy to be able to stand up here today and celebrate her. 

If you know [Bride], you know how thoughtful she is -- she always takes care of others before herself. This is why I was so happy when she met [Groom], who is equally giving and has always made her his top priority -- even on their very first date, which he took the red-eye back for after a work trip because it worked best with [bride's] schedule.

RELATED: The Best Love Quotes for Him and Her

[Tell the story of your first impression of the groom]. Example: My first impression of [Groom] was that taking care of others was also important to him. He really went out of his way to make sure all of our friends had a great time at the restaurant we were at, even going out of his way to carry the drinks over to our table himself when he saw how busy our waitress was -- something that I could see [Bride] doing as well. 

Over the last [X] years, I've seen how happy being with [groom] has made [bride], and I'm so honored to be here to wish them well. [Bride] has truly met her match, and I can't wait to see what's in store for you both as you start your lives together.

Please join me in a toast to the new couple – as the character from our favorite TV show put it best, [insert love quote here]. Cheers to the happy couple!

Speech for a Sister

Thank you all for being here to celebrate my sister, [Bride]. I'm the youngest of five siblings, and being the only other girl, [bride] was forced to team up with me against our brothers. I've looked up to her in so many ways and continue to learn from her even in adulthood. She has always paved her own way, and I admire that about her. 

When [Bride] met [Groom], I knew instantly that something had changed. She seemed calmer and at ease. After meeting [Groom], it was clear that his easy-going nature and go with the flow attitude had rubbed off on my sister. [Groom] fits so well with our family, it almost feels like he's always been a part of it. I'm so excited to make that official today.

Let's raise a glass to toast the happy couple. I wish you both a lifetime of unconditional love and happiness and can't wait to see what the next chapter brings. Cheers!

Funny Maid of Honor Speech

Hi everyone, I'm [Name], and I've been [Bride's] best friend since we met on the playground in elementary school. We've come a long way since staking our claim on the best swings at recess. [Bride] has been friends with me through thick and thin, and there's nothing I wouldn't do for her. Including giving a maid of honor speech to a room full of strangers. 

Everyone who meets [Bride] likes her more than me, even my own cat, which is fair since she's absolutely my better half. She's selfless, hilarious and can turn any situation into a positive one. Even when [Groom] called her the wrong name on their blind first date, she stuck to it and played the role of [Name]. Luckily he got it right when he said "I Do" today.

RELATED:  Unconditional Love: What is It & How Do You Find It?

In all seriousness, I'm so happy [Bride] and [Groom] found one another. These two look at each other the way I look at the food being brought to my table at a restaurant. I know they're going to have a happy, beautiful life together...and I'm an ugly crier so I'm going to stop there. 

Let's raise a glass to the new couple. Wishing you both the best that life has to offer. Cheers!

Writing a maid of honor speech is an important job. This speech will likely be something that the couple refers back to throughout their lives, that gets played whenever they revisit their wedding video.

Writing a maid of honor speech can feel overwhelming but having a maid of honor speech template and maid of honor speech examples to refer back to can be a huge help. Overall, be authentic and show the bride in the best light. And don't forget to make a toast!

KEEP READING:

Social exchange theory: psychology’s most powerful relationship hack, explained, hot stories, why setting relationship goals is important - and how to do it.

Ever wondered how power couple, Beyoncé and Jay-Z keep their love alive for 16 years? Hint: luck has nothing to do with it. If you've been blaming your failed relationships on "the wrong person"—think again. It may be time to reconsider who is really at fault.

Just like building a dream career, successful relationships don't happen overnight and they don't happen by chance. It takes hard work, thoughtful strategizing, and it isn't always "sexy." Forget the glitz and glam—these power couples know the real secret lies in setting goals and boundaries. From cozy date nights to self-care, these are a few A-listers who are masters at making love last.

Ready to unlock their secrets?

A Lasting, Passionate Relationship Isn't Just For Starry-Eyed Romantics—It's For Skeptics Too!

According to award-winning psychotherapist and TV host Dr. Jenn Mann, the #1 reason relationships don't make it past the 1-year mark is because as soon as our relationship doesn't go according to plan, tensions can get so high, the whole relationship crumbles.

"It is easy to get along in the honeymoon phase of a relationship. During the early stages, when we are falling in love, all we see is how alike we are and how wonderful our new partner is. We see our commonalities, not our differences. “You like pizza. I like pizza! We are so alike! We are perfect for each other!” We are merged. We feel like one person, a unit, a “we.” The first time we see our differences, it may feel like a huge betrayal (“What do you mean you voted for him?”), because it marks the moment when we are thrown back into the reality of being two separate people with different thoughts and beliefs." So what about all the people who make it past the honeymoon phase? The "1 year mark"? Does that mean they have it all figured out? Jenn Mann , Instyle

RELATED: After 40 Years Together Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell Refuse to Marry–How They Work Against the Rules

Maybe...but maybe not. Ask yourself are your partner really share a deep and powerful connection, or are you just co-existing...like glorified roommates?

We've all heard the dreaded saying, "I love them but I'm not in love with them"—in fact, we've probably even said it ourselves, but what if we told you that being "in love" isn't the luck of the draw you think it is?

What Are Relationship Goals? Why Are They Important?

Relationship goals are more than just whimsical fantasies or Instagram-worthy snapshots; they are the guiding principles that steer a couple toward a fulfilling and harmonious partnership. At their core, relationship goals encompass the shared visions, aspirations, and milestones that both partners aim to achieve together. These goals provide a roadmap for growth, fostering communication, understanding, and mutual respect along the way.

Most importantly, they serve as your relationship-sonar in times of turbulence so you and your co-pilot can navigate the storm together. From building trust and deepening intimacy to navigating challenges as a united front, setting relationship goals cultivates a sense of purpose and commitment that strengthens the bond between partners.

In essence, relationship goals aren't just important—they are the foundation upon which enduring love is built.

How to Get Clear on Your Love Goals

CANNES, FRANCE - MAY 12: Actor George Clooney and his wife Amal Clooney attend the "Money Monster" premiere during the 69th annual Cannes Film Festival at the Palais des Festivals on May 12, 2016 in Cannes, France.

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Whether you're in a happily committed relationship, enjoying the thrill of new love, or searching for a partner, setting relationship goals is within everyone's reach. But before we dive into pursuing the love we desire, it's important to have a clear idea of what that love actually looks like.

Some Questions To Ask Yourself

• What does my ideal, healthy relationships look like?
• What romantic relationships do I idealize?
• How would my partner and I stay on the same page or resolve conflict?
• How do I prefer to receive love from my partner?
• How would my partner and I best communicate in everyday life?

When it comes to setting relationship goals, it's not one-size-fits-all. Getting a clear picture of what a healthy relationship looks like for you may be vastly different than what it looks like for a friend or a family member.

Don't be afraid to compare notes but try and stay away from comparing goals.

The 8 Most Important Couple Goals To Set And When

​NEW YORK, NY - MAY 05: Actors Blake Lively (L) and Ryan Reynolds attend the "Charles James: Beyond Fashion" Costume Institute Gala at the Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 5, 2014 in New York City. 

Photo by Mike Coppola/Getty Images

First and foremost, relationship goals should be something both you and your partner set together. Setting one-sided couple goals probably isn't the best idea and will likely lead to disappointment. You have to start somewhere—and the best place to start is on the same page.

"When Ryan and I got together, we made a rule not to work at the same time so that we could always prioritize our personal life. That takes working really hard when we're not. Just like financial planning and sustaining that - it takes balance." Blake Lively, Further Ado Podcast

If you're drawing a blank on what an appropriate relationship goal looks like, here are the 8 most important things to know when it comes to making your relationship work.

#1. Understand Each Other's " Love Language "

Counselor, Gary Chapman coined the widely popular theory of the "Five Love Languages". In his work, Chapman found that couples often had difficulty feeling and expressing love (despite their partner's best efforts). So he broke down the themes from these discussions into what's known as the five love languages:

• Physical touch
• Quality time
• Acts of service
• Words of affirmation.

Chances are, you and your partner don't have the same love language. The chances are even higher that you show your partner love the way you want to receive love. It's a bit of a trap. The problem probably looks a little something like this :

• After a long work week, you spend hours cooking your partner their all-time favorite meal (acts of service)—the least they could do is wash the dishes (acts of service).
• Instead, the dishes pile up in the sink while they run over to the TV and put on your favorite movie for a Netflix and cuddle sesh (Quality Time, Physical Touch).
• Even though their heart's in the right place, you can't enjoy the movie because you're too busy thinking if they really "loved" you...that casserole dish wouldn't be soaking in the sink.

It easy to see why identifying you and your partner's love language is a quick way to get crossed wires, uncrossed. Good news is, "quality time" is one of the most common love languages and it here's a simple hack to get it right.

#2. Commit To A Weekly Date Night — "Don't Stop The Romance"

NEW YORK, NY - CIRCA 1978: Suzanne Somers and husband Alan Hamel at Studio 54 circa 1978 in New York City.

Robin Platzer/IMAGES/Getty Images

If there's one thing Suzanne Somers and Alan Hamel knew how to get right—it was romance.

After 55 years together, Somers heartbreakingly passed away in 2023 and fans were overwhelmed by Hamel's masterful letter he wrote to Somers in her final days. He found a way to pack 55 years of love into one last, beautiful, tearjerking punch.

READ MORE: On Her Final Night, Suzanne Somers’ Read Alan Hamel’s Love Letter – A Beautiful Look at Love After 46 Years

But even though the love of his life would leave him too soon—Hamel and Somers lived with no regrets. They made every moment on earth together count. In rain or shine—dressed up or dressed down—the soulmates famously shared the secret to their marriage:

"Listen to one another, give each other a lot of attention, keep it exciting, date. My marriage is very romantic. … We might sit here and have a tequila. … We dance, I cook, we sit out and watch the moonlight on the ocean." Suzanne Somers

They also reportedly had sex twice a day—but who's counting!

#3. Maintain The Physical Connection

TOPSHOT - US singer-songwriter Taylor Swift kisses Kansas City Chiefs' tight end #87 Travis Kelce after the Chiefs won Super Bowl LVIII against the San Francisco 49ers at Allegiant Stadium in Las Vegas, Nevada, February 11, 2024.

PATRICK T. FALLON/AFP via Getty Images

While we may not all have the libido of ThighMaster influencer Suzanne Somers we don't have to! When it comes to setting relationship goals around intimacy don't underestimate the significance of physical touch.

Incorporating consistent physical connection into your relationship offers numerous benefits. Simple gestures like hand-holding, hugs, or a reassuring pat on the shoulder can trigger the release of oxytocin, the "feel-good hormone," while also reducing cortisol levels, the body's stress hormone.

While physical intimacy is undeniably important, it's crucial to understand that it's just one facet of intimacy in a relationship. Intellectual, spiritual, and emotional connections are equally vital. Creating a safe and comfortable environment where both partners understand each other's preferences and boundaries enhances the pleasure derived from physical touch.

However, it's essential to approach physical intimacy with sensitivity and awareness. Attempting to force physical closeness or using it as a substitute for deeper emotional connection can backfire. Achieving a healthy balance in physical touch requires open communication, mutual understanding of body language, and respect for each other's boundaries.

Remember, physical connection encompasses more than just sexual intimacy. From a warm hug in the morning to a sweet kiss goodnight, there are countless ways to express affection and strengthen the bond with your partner.

You don't need to be an expert in massage therapy to reap the benefits of physical touch—simple gestures can go a long way in nurturing intimacy and emotional well-being. So, prioritize physical connections and make them an integral part of your relationship journey.

However, try not to get the purpose of the "love languages" confused. Showing your partner "love" is so important but it's not a substitute for the sometimes hard conversations.

#4. Improve Your Communication

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When it comes to love communication really is key—and miscommunications are one of the first things that can tear a couple apart.

As you’re building your list of goals, an important thing to think about is the way you and your partner communicate. It's easy to make the assumption that our partner knows exactly how we feel–—but assumptions can be deadly to a relationship. No matter how long the two of you have been together, your partner can never know what you truly feel unless you tell them. So prioritize communication.

"If I was going to have an equal voice with this very opinionated man, I had to get myself up." - Michelle Obama, "Becoming"

Understanding how your partner feels and why they think this way is critical to a healthy romantic partnership. Different backgrounds, upbringings and experiences can sometimes make it difficult to see things from our partner's perspective. Make it part of your relationship goals to better understand one another.

If communication is a couple goal you both want to prioritize but have trouble with, seeking the help of a licensed therapist to act as an unbiased evaluator can be a great tool to utilize.

Just ask Barack Obama and Michelle Obama! After 30 years together, the former President and First Lady have openly credited therapy as a huge help in making sure they are always on the same page!

#5. Discuss Your Shared Values And Prepare For Values To Change AS You Grow

TOPSHOT - US actor Ben Affleck kisses US actress and singer Jennifer Lopez as they arrive for the screening of the film "The Last Duel" presented out of competition on September 10, 2021 during the 78th Venice Film Festival at Venice Lido.

FILIPPO MONTEFORTE/AFP via Getty Images

One of the biggest miscommunications a couple can have is thinking they have the same values—only to find out, in big relationship-defining moments they couldn't be more wrong. A relationship-defining moment could be when a couple is deciding how they want to raise their children or whether or not they want to get married. This discovery can be devastating. The million-dollar question is, how do you avoid it?

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck are great examples of a Hollywood "it" couple who had miscommunications and learned from it. "Bennifer" didn't make it the first time around—and the exes went on to raise their children in very different ways—with Lopez opting for a more lavish Miami lifestyle and Affleck keeping it low-key in LA. So what changed? What made this couple reunite years later?

Did the stars align? Or did they just get clear on their shared values?

Though the two went their separate ways in 2004, 17 years later they resurrected one of Hollywood’s favorite romances. After being spotted on multiple loved-up outings and at red-carpet appearances together, they were finally married in 2023. But before they tied the knot the couple made it a priority to talk about what mattered and how this time was going to be different.

In an exclusive sit down with VOGUE, Lopez shared how the second time around was even better than the first. They had years to mature and become full-formed individuals. When they reunited they were no longer "two halves" struggling to make a whole. They were two whole people coming together who put their shared family values first, instead of their careers.

He’s a wonderful, wonderful father and father figure to them as well, ’cause he has his own three beautiful children and then there’s us. He’s fantastic. He really steps up to the challenge of what [being a stepfather] is and what that means, and they love him." Jennifer Lopez, VOGUE (2023)

Lopez and Affleck's story is a revealing reminder of the significance of aligning with a partner who shares your values, particularly when envisioning a future together. While initial discussions about important topics such as living arrangements, family planning, and career aspirations may lay the foundation for a strong connection, it's crucial to recognize that values can evolve over time.

Continual communication about evolving priorities and aspirations is essential for maintaining harmony and alignment within the relationship. Whether it's a shift in living preferences or a newfound desire to establish roots in a specific location, addressing these changes openly and honestly fosters understanding and prevents potential conflicts down the road.

If identifying your and your partner's values may feel too broad, here are the 7 most important "core values " according to psychotherapist and celebrity relationship guru, Esther Perel.

• Communication : Keeping open lines of communication with your partner can set you up to have a successful relationship. The busyness of life can make it challenging for couples to keep one another informed. However, maintaining a clear back-and-forth of information is the only way to ensure the relationship will be sustainable.
• Equality : Seeing each other as equals fosters mutual respect. This can create a deeper emotional connection and create greater intimacy between you and your partner.
• Honesty : Honesty and trust go hand in hand. Being honest with your loved one allows you to build a healthy relationship. Without honesty, the foundation of the relationship can falter and lead to heartbreak.
• Intimacy : Take time for physical and emotional intimacy. You should not ignore a healthy sex life, frequent displays of affection, and date nights.
• Shared beliefs : Religious beliefs can play a significant part in a person’s life. Though religious differences do not always signal a deal-breaker, having shared beliefs can make navigating through life together, especially if parenting, easier.
• Trust : Every good relationship needs a foundation of trust. Relationship experts claim trust is the most important value of every successful relationship. Without trust, romantic relationships quickly deteriorate.
• Validation : Emotional validation is the process of making your partner feel understood. Ensure you acknowledge their points of view and emotions. Emotional validation provides mental health benefits and is a healthy way to care for your partner's well-being.

While it's highly unlikely you and your partner will share all values, you and your partner must have at least 3-5 of these values in common.

#6. Support One Another—No Matter What"Always supporting me (literally)"

The #1 most important shared values a couple needs to have, is family values. David Beckham and Victoria Beckham may just be the best example when it comes to demonstrating how powerful supporting your partner can be (literally)! After all, you're not just building a life together...you're building your forever family.

Even though celebs are stars in their own right—over 25 years together have proven the power couple are partners in work and in life. The couple share four children: Brooklyn , 24, Romeo , 21, Cruz , 19, and Harper Seven , 11.

In their widely successful Netflix doc, Beckham , The Beckhams unpack years of their life together. The ups (winning a World Cup), the downs (the cheating scandal that nearly broke them), and everything in between!

The power couple may lead crazy busy lives but it's never stopped them from making sure family comes first.

"Running a business [and] most importantly, being a mum, wouldn't be possible without David. Not only is he the most incredible father, but he's supportive and someone who loves and inspires me every single day." Victoria Beckham, Glamour Women of the Year Award.

The bottom line is—if you're putting them before you and they are putting you before them, you have the best chance for success. But supporting your partner can look different depending on the situation. It's not about blindly agreeing to everything they say. Sometimes it looks like challenging their beliefs to help them grow

#7. Fight Fair—Be A "Master Negotiator"

EAST HAMPTON, NY - JULY 06: Barbra Streisand and James Brolin attend the "And So It Goes" premiere at Guild Hall on July 6, 2014 in East Hampton, New York.

Sonia Moskowitz/Getty Images

Disagreements in relationships are inevitable. How delicately a couple navigates conflicts can make or break a relationship. So that's why if you're going to fight, fight fair. Or in other words: compromise!

"I think everybody needs to be a negotiator. Everybody needs to have patience and know when to take a walk." James Brolin, PEOPLE

After 25 years of marriage to the legendary diva Barbra Streisand, it should go without saying that Brolin knows a thing or two about conflict resolution. His advice couldn't be more spot on.

RELATED: Barbra Streisand and James Brolin’s Advice for a Successful Marriage Is Seriously Simple

Research suggests that "happy couples" avoid criticism, steer clear of extreme language, and prevent arguments from escalating through joint problem-solving.

If you know your partner shuts down when things get heated, don't push their boundaries and force them to give you answers. Step back. Give them space to think. Or in James Brolin's words let them "take a walk."

Fighting fair can look like this:

• Knowing how your partner's conflict resolution style may differ from your own
• Respecting your partner's boundaries
• Making your needs known

If this all sounds like a lot—one simple trick to remember when you're in a heated debate with your partner is to avoid starting a sentence with "you always..." or "you never..."!

Do they always leave the toilet seat up? They never take out the garbage?

Probably not. But the truth is, remembering this when we're "seeing red" can feel impossible. In the middle of a fight—the #1 most important thing to remember is this—what outcome do we really want after passions cool and the fight is over?

Do we want to hurt or do we want to heal?

#8. Manage Your Emotions—Don't Forget You Want The Same Outcome!

9th November 1999: Married American actors Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick smiling while standing in front of a handheld 'Access Hollywood' microphone at the For All Kids Foundation's Second Annual White Rose Awards Gala at the Marriott Marquis in Times Square, New York City.

Karl Feile/Hulton Archive/Getty Images

It shouldn't come as a surprise that effective communication is critical for a healthy relationship, but just because this goal is simple—doesn't mean it's easy.

When we have a problem with our partner it can be tempting to "outsource" for advice. We may call our mom or a best friend. We swear we're "just venting," but a lot of the time what we are looking for is advice.

That's not always a bad thing! But it can be a slippery slope (especially when you're not dealing with a licensed professional).

We can be quick to tell everyone what our problem with our partner is...except our partner!

That's why after over 30 years of marriage to Matthew Broderick, Sarah Jessica Parker's best piece of advice is to "keep things just between the two of you".

RELATED: Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick’s Advice to a Lasting Marriage Is One Very Simple ‘Secret’

Asking outside opinions can distract us from dealing with the real problem. We can't expect someone to change if they don't know what is going on with us, right?

If Your Partner Calls You The More "Emotional" One...

If your partner calls you the more "emotional" one, when problems arise, you're probably pretty reactive. Chances are you read into every little action and behavior—when they seem "distant" you take it personally.

The "emotional one" is the person pacing in the living room, interrogating their partner who sits silently on the couch cross-armed. It's confusing. The more you try to "communicate"—the more they shut down.

But remember facts are not feelings! Sometimes when you think you're communicating—you're not. You may phrase your insecurities like a question—but really you're making a statement.

For Example: In a tense car ride after leaving your mother-in-law's house you may ask your partner, "Why do you never stand up for me?" Even though it's phrased like a question it's not. You're telling them they never stand up for you. It makes sense they may get defensive or shut down completely.

That's not a conversation. That's a confrontation.

If you're a volcanic eruption of emotions all your partner is going to want to do is step on rocks to dodge the hot lava!

Conflict Resolution Tip: For The "Emotional Ones"

Try taking a beat and not being so reactive. Breathe and ask yourself if the big emotions you're experiencing are rooted in reality. Then sit with it for a few days.

If you're still feeling you have something you need to say, then say it!

Your partner may get defensive but trust they will come around—because they want your relationship to work too. Don't jump on every little word they say. Wait it out. Actively listen instead of waiting for what you want to hear.

Don't take their pace personally. Just because you may want to "fix" the problem right away, doesn't mean it's always the right answer.

If Your Partner Calls You The More "Emotionally Unavailable" One...

For the "emotionally unavailable" ones, communicating looks completely different.

Unlike their partners, the "emotionally unavailable" ones tend to suppress and detach from their relationship conflicts. This can lead to big miscommunications that eventually push their partner away in the long run—which isn't what they want!

If the "Emotional" partner seems to care too much— the "emotionally unavailable" partner doesn't seem to care at all. However no matter how convincing their act may be, this isn't the truth.

The emotionally unavailable partner wants to be seen and heard too. They just don't know how to process their feelings at the same rate! The "emotional" partner has a tendency to take over the conversation and leave little room for the "emotionally unavailable" partner to process their feelings and say their piece.

So instead, they shut down. But what these personality types don't understand is their partner wants to hear how they feel. They just have a hard time asking instead of guessing.

RELATED: HOW YOUR ATTACHMENT STYLE AFFECTS YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Once you can identify why this caused you to feel a certain way, try and get into these habits:

• Talk to loved ones about what they’re feeling
• Write down what you think and feel
• Try meditation or therapy
• Exercise to relieve stress and increase endorphins
• Practice being aware of their thoughts when they’re emotional
• Remove themselves from an emotional situation if it is becoming uncontrollable

Don't be afraid to discuss these goals with your partner. It's about progress not perfection. They just want reassurance that you care. Don't be afraid to ask for them to work on their emotional regulation too.

These sorts of goals are often best met when both parties are working together, and often key components of a more lasting love.

If nothing else remember: it's not a confrontation, it's a conversation!

How to set goals: a normal and healthy part of a relationship.

You understand why it's essential to set goals in a healthy and thriving relationship and have a few couple goals in mind that you'd like to discuss with your partner. Now it's time to sit down and have a conversation. Here are a few tips for setting relationship goals with your significant other.

• Choose a neutral space to discuss relationship goals
• Determine the length of time for each relationship goal
• Set check-in dates for each relationship goal
• Include at least one fun relationship goal
• Make sure your relationship goals are measurable
• Evaluate how your love goals make you feel
• Make sure your couple goals are equally weighted

Don't just set and forget your goals. Consistency is key. Achieving goals requires ongoing work from both you and your partner.

It Works If You Work It—Because You're Worth It!

Setting relationship goals takes time and effort – but the payoff is worth it. Even if you decide to start small, setting couple goals will undoubtedly yield a stronger relationship.

However it's important to remember while there is no shame in working on your relationship don't mistake setting goals with trying to change your partner. Sadly, sometimes when a relationship has soured it's a case of not-meant-to-be that all the self-help books in the world can't fix.

However, if you're merely ironing out the wrinkles with the right person and you both share aligned love goals, you'll have a clear pathway for achieving them and a means of assessing your relationship goals as you move forward. It's important to keep in mind that working towards relationship goals should be a positive endeavor – something that feels rewarding and enjoyable.

"Every woman in her late 20s goes through a period where she just doesn't believe love is out there anymore, but it is. And I think the minute you stop looking for it is when it comes for you." Kristen Bell

With the right tools, effort and mindset, you can use relationship goals to build the future you want with your partner.

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Snoop dogg wouldn't choose sides, tupac called him out, the real reason why cameron diaz left hollywood for good, antonio banderas chose dakota johnson, his marriage blew up, high school crushes meet again at 50th reunion - then, a phone call leads to them getting married, how jennifer aniston saved reese witherspoon, did all the break ups lead jennifer lopez to her true love, liam neeson left his son after losing wife natasha richardson, kevin costner wishes he could tell whitney houston this.., subscribe to our newsletter, the great takedown of nickelodeon’s dan schneider - how even small voices have the power for impact, chris gardner beyond the pursuit of happyness: the work begins, 100 powerful motivational quotes to help you rise above, wim hof: the iceman’s heroic journey to warming the hearts of millions, how adam sandler saved drew barrymore again.

Growing up with no family whatsoever, Drew Barrymore desperately searched for a place to call home. But her dark past and abandonment led Drew down a tragic path, ultimately leading to a heartbreaking divorce. She was determined to close herself off for good, but Adam saw a rare and precious light inside of her. Why couldn’t Adam let Drew fight this nightmare alone? And what led Drew to face the biggest pain of her past once and for all?

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How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech in 7 Steps

By wedding spot.

Whether you’ve never written a speech before or you’re a toast-giving pro, writing a maid of honor speech can present some unforeseen nerves, which is completely understandable. After all, public speaking is one of the most widely-felt fears across the world. That being said, it’s important to remember that the moment isn’t about you; it’s about your best friend/sibling/etc. marrying the love of their life. To make things easier, we compiled a step-by-step guide on how to write a maid of honor speech, as well as some do’s and don’ts to help you feel confident on the big day.

Learn how to write a maid of honor speech in 7 simple steps:

The beginning.

Step 1: Begin your speech-writing journey with some brainstorming. Whether that’s creating an outline, scribbling down a stream of consciousness, typing out specific stories that come to mind when thinking of the bride and their partner, or anything in between, brainstorming is a helpful first pass of getting your ideas in order.

Here are a few writing prompts to get your creative juices flowing:

What words best describe the happy couple and their relationship?

What is your favorite memory with the bride?

What do you remember about the time period when the couple first met?

What do you picture when you think of the newlyweds in five years? Ten years? Fifty years?

What is a story that epitomizes their relationship?

Step 2: Once you have a bit of a road map, begin writing out the actual speech. Start by getting all of the “business” out of the way. Start by introducing yourself and how you know the bride. Make sure to thank whoever hosted both the rehearsal dinner and the wedding, as well as any showers /parties that you’ve been to throughout the course of the engagement. 

Step 3: Spend some time talking about the bride and your relationship with each other. Paint a vivid picture of what things were like when you first met. Tell a lovely anecdote of your friendship — maybe there’s a funny story of an adventure the two of you went on together. Embrace the authentic nature of yourself as well as the bride. If your friendship is more sentimental, make this part of the speech sentimental. If your friendship is more wild and funny, add some humor to this section. But most importantly, make sure to keep it more about the bride than about you!

Step 4: Next up, the bride’s partner. Whether you know them well or not, use this as a moment to talk about what makes them wonderful. This is the perfect segue into the next section of your speech, which is about the couple together. 

Step 5: Now it’s time to talk about the newlyweds as a couple. You can tell the story of their first date from your perspective. How they’ve both grown into incredible people as individuals and as partners. Maybe something you admire about them or a quality of theirs that inspires you as a person. This should be the meat of your speech. Add jokes. Flourish with detail. Spill your heart. But remember, if you’re adding humor to your speech, make sure you don’t include a bunch of super-inside jokes that guests won’t understand. Also, be sure to leave pauses for laughter. You don’t want to talk over any laughs, because it will make it hard for some guests to hear what you’re saying next.

Step 6: Now it’s time to tie your whole speech up. If you can, summarize everything you’ve said up to this point with a few sentences. The theme of your speech, in other words. For example, “Rachel and Jackson exemplify what it means to be a supportive partner.” No matter what you do here. try to avoid any cliche phrases to keep your speech fresh and unique.

Step 7: End the speech with a toast. It’s important that you signal to everyone your speech is coming to a close, and a toast is a perfect way to do it. Something as simple as, “Here’s to the newlyweds! May you never stop loving and never stop growing. Cheers!” is all you need to say.

Do’s and don’ts of maid of honor speeches:

Do: Stay authentic to your true self! If you’re funny, make a joke. If you’re nostalgic, reminisce on the past. If you’re bold, add something unique. If you stay true to yourself, you can’t go wrong. Remember: You were picked for this role for a reason!

Don’t: Use a pre-written speech you found online. It may be tempting if you’ve never written a speech before, but we promise it will feel fake and won’t be in line with the unique beauty of the special couple.

Do: Practice! Some people say it’s best to practice in front of a mirror. Others say to recite your speech to a trusted friend or family member. But either way, make sure you practice your speech out loud .

Don’t: Mention any exes. There are some rare instances that this is OK, but it’s something you should run by the couple/their parents/etc. first no matter what.

Do: Speak slowly and articulate your words, both when practicing and on the big night. Many people have the tendency to talk much faster when they’re nervous . Try to be cognizant of this before, and during, your speech.

Don’t: Drag on forever. Short and sweet is better than long and boring.  The ideal running time for a maid of honor speech is between 2-3 minutes. The goal is to keep it short, but impactful.

Do: Use quotes and passages that mean something to you and the couple.

Don’t: Drink too much before having to give your speech.

Do: Use notecards to help you remember your speech. It’s best not to write the entire speech on note cards if you can avoid it. That way you can make eye contact with guests and be fully present. 

Don’t: Put too much pressure on yourself. This should be a wonderful moment of love. When you feel yourself getting anxious or feeling not good enough, remember that it’s all about love.

Do: Have a fabulous night filled with joy, excitement, and memories to come!

Put this guide on how to write a maid of honor speech to use!

Now that you know seven foolproof steps on how to write a maid of honor speech, along with tips and essential do’s and don'ts, you’re ready to help usher in the couple’s entry into wedded bliss. Keep in mind that being chosen as the maid of honor is a complete honor, and it comes with its own list of responsibilities. To make sure you’re completely prepared, we’ve compiled a maid of honor duties checklist to keep you on the ball and eliminate any anxiety you might be feeling. Above all else, remember: This is a celebration of love! You’re going to be great.

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The Wedding Spot blog is designed to help couples navigate every step of the wedding planning journey. From before the engagement to after you say “I do,” our goal is to give you the tips, ideas, and inspiration to prepare for your big day — and all that comes with it.

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How to Write a Maid of Honour Speech: A Wedding Editor's Guide

Been asked to give a maid of honour speech? Our Editor explains how to give the perfect speech as a bridesmaid, with expert tips from speech writing pros

Mark Horton Photos

I’ve been working in weddings now for over 10 years, and in that time, I’ve read more wedding speeches than I dare to count. I’m fluent in cheesy puns, sentimental toasts and eye-roll inducing anecdotes, but I don’t get to see many maid of honour speeches .

I love everything about weddings - except for how silent women usually are during them. Give me bride speeches , give me maid of honour speeches and a tribute from the mother of the bride! So when my sister asked me to give a maid of honour speech at her wedding, I was delighted.

Just one problem - I didn’t know where to start. How do you write a maid of honour speech? I’m going to tell you everything I learned about giving a maid of honour speech, including expert tips from pro speech writer Heidi Ellert-McDermott from Speechy . 

Does the Maid of Honour Give a Speech?

Traditionally, the maid of honour doesn’t give a speech at a wedding - but what is tradition, really? Just peer pressure from dead old guys - the kind of dead old guys who didn’t like it when women spoke up.

So you can absolutely give a maid of honour speech! And you should, even if it’s just to annoy the dead old guys. 

How to Write a Maid of Honour Speech?

The hardest thing I found about writing a speech as a bridesmaid was that there wasn’t a template. Don’t get me wrong, we have lots of lovely maid of honour speech examples to inspire you, but unlike the speeches for the best man , the groom etc., there’s no formula in place for who you thank, or who you’re supposed to toast.

In fact, it’s all so neatly divided up in the order of wedding speeches for the men, that actually if you go into that territory, you’re probably stepping on someone’s toes and usurping their speech.

So, with that in mind, I asked to go first - that allowed the traditional wedding speech order to remain mostly unchanged, and it meant that I got the floor first for all the jokes. Sneaky, I know. 

Wedding speech expert Heidi advises: “Discuss the length of your speech with the nearlyweds before you start writing it. You never want to go over ten minutes (about 1,300 words including room for laughter) but you may want to go significantly shorter if there are more than the usual three speakers at the wedding and the speeches are scheduled one after the other.

“Of course, while you always want to leave people wanting more, you’re probably short-changing the bride if your speech is less than 750 words. You need enough time to be sentimental, humorous and tell a few classic anecdotes.”

How to Start a Bridesmaid or Maid of Honour Speech

“Don’t get sucked into thinking you need to go overly formal. No need for a ‘Good evening, ladies and gentlemen’; a ‘hello everyone’ sets a friendlier tone,” recommends Heidi.

I did introduce myself as the sister of the bride when giving my speech, but actually as I looked around the room I realised I probably didn’t need to as I knew everyone there - if it's a smaller, intimate setting or there’s an MC, you don’t need to waste your word count on this. 

I followed Heidi’s advice to not bother “mentioning the lovely venue, or any other wedding-waffle,” as I knew that would come in the later speeches.

What to Include in a Maid of Honour Speech

Heidi recommends that a good maid of honour or bridesmaid speech should include the following: 

Stories: Think about a couple of classic anecdotes that illustrate the bride’s funniest and best qualities and quirks in action.

Humour: You might not think you’re a naturally funny person but that’s still no excuse for not trying to get some giggles. While you don’t have the pressure of the best man, having a few funny lines in your speech makes it more entertaining and memorable. Humour also makes people like you more – especially self-deprecating humour.

Meaningful Tributes: Observe your friend in action and spot the behaviours that make you love her as much as you do. As well as paying tribute to your friend, make sure you also pay tribute to their spouse. Talk about why they make the perfect couple and your hopes for their future together.

Making Your Maid of Honour Speech Funny

mark horton photos

I started my maid of honour speech for my sister with a funny but sentimental tribute to her and her partner - I talked about how much I’d enjoyed my experience in a jokey, light-hearted way (saying I got to walk down the aisle with a nice dress and flowers, but no wedding planning stress or financial burdens), and led into how I’d finally got the brother I’d always wished for in my new brother-in-law, which resulted in a surprise round of applause breaking out. 

As I knew going too sentimental would make me well up - and I had expensive false lashes to think of - I very quickly pivoted into a funny story from our childhood, complete with a retro 90s prop I’d sourced from eBay to lean into the gag. 

I made sure the anecdote had a purpose though - as well as making everyone laugh, it did demonstrate some of my sister’s character traits, and I was able to link them to her relationship, and use it as a basis for some marriage advice. 

Don’t believe the rumour that only the best man can have a funny speech - people at weddings want to have a laugh, so you can put some wedding jokes in there, or hilarious personal anecdotes, as your audience will be keen to laugh with you.

How to End a Maid of Honour Speech

It’s traditional to end your maid of honour speech with a toast - obviously all wedding speeches have set people you’re meant to toast, but I didn’t really mind if I stepped on anyone’s toes here, after all, the newlyweds can’t be toasted too much on their wedding day!

I couldn’t resist a little cheesy gag (they’re for everyone, not just best men!) so I urged everyone to stand, ‘for my standing ovation,’ before asking them to raise their glasses to the bride and groom. 

I tied the toast into my anecdote to make it more personal, choosing to say: “May you always admit when you are wrong, and may you never share a bath. To Sops and Sam!” You’ll have to read my maid of honour speech to get that joke…

Personalising the toast and bringing it back to something you’ve spoken about it your speech is a great way to set it apart from all the toasts that will follow, or have come before. 

Reflecting on my experience of giving a speech as a bridesmaid, I’d say the part I thought would be the hardest - not having a template - actually turned out to be the most liberating bit. 

You don’t have to get tied up in thank yous and compliments, instead, you can speak from the heart. And let’s face it, for all the funny stories a best man can tell, we just know the female best friend or sister of the bride is sitting on an absolute goldmine.

Discover the absolute best wedding toasts here, now you know how to write your speech!

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